*lightning*
BOOM! (thunder)
Mary Sue…is…ALIVE!!!
*piercing shriek of horror from Emily of Duranan*
MWAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAAAHAHH!!!!
Well, then…oh, wait. You're still here? *sigh* Guess I'd better give you the chapter then…
Disclaimer: Get it through your heads. I. DO. NOT. OWN. TORTALL! Or anything in Tortall, except for Mary Sue, who believe me is not a fun thing to own. I prohibit you to steal her, though; geez, the last thing we need is another Mary Sue running around the tp board.
(yes, yes, I'm a hypocrite…)
Mary Sue of Tortall
Chapter 4
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Mary Sue may have looked like your average—well, above-average—beautiful, buffle-brained lady as she walked briskly down to breakfast, but her mind was actually hard at work. She needed to come up with the rest of her alias. Mary Sue of…of…
"Excuse me, o fair one, dear sunrise, did you by chance drop this?"
The speaker was a young, tall, rather dim looking squire; an unruly mop of red curls flopped over into his grey eyes. He held a diamond pin that caught the light prettily. For some odd reason, she felt her heart begin to melt…
*
Thirty minutes, a quick detour in the servants' hallway, and a change of clothes later, Mary Sue of Diamond Pin once again made her way down the hallway. If her cheeks were a little flushed, her hair the tiniest pit out of place, no one said anything; it just made her look prettier.
*
"…Sir Myles is crazy if he thinks we're going to be able to do a 30-page essay on the Scanran wars all in one night, especially when we've got to practice for exhibition all week!"
Neal rolled his eyes. "We all already know that Sir Myles is crazy," he said dryly. "I think he made that quite clear last Midwinter when he expected yours truly to carry on a conversation with the—erm—lovely Lady Ursula. For three hours. So that he could sneak away to play chess and drink wine."
"You should talk about being crazy, Neal," Kel said with a grin. She turned to the rest o their messmates. "Neal here was going on this morning about how when he went to his rooms this morning, a beautiful blonde was undressing in there—stop kicking me, Neal—and then—I'm not going to stop telling them, Nealan, so you might as well give up before I decide to go at you with my glaive—and then, she kicked him out of his own rooms."
Faleron, Owen, Merric, and Seaver all looked skeptically at Neal, who sat red-faced with a scowl on his face. "What?" he cried, hands flying into the air. "It's true!"
Kel stifled a small giggle at her overly dramatic friend. Only Neal would start to hallucinate about gorgeous women as a side effect of being dumped by his fiancée. That's not nice, she reprimanded herself. You know Neal's still heartbroken over Yuki. No need to make him the butt of jokes for it.
Glancing around the table, she realized something was missing.
"Hey guys—where's Cleon?"
Right on cue, the lanky redhead burst into the mess hall, his complexion almost matching his hair. Kel arched her eyebrows. She knew what made his face that color…
Apparently Faleron didn't. "Cleon," he asked bemusedly, "what happened to you?"
"I, uh," he nervously ran a hand through his curls, "well, y'see, I was in the hallway, and I noticed this piece of jewelry, and—well, I asked this drop-dead-gorgeous lady if it was hers—and then—well—it's like I've been reborn…nothing will ever be the same…" At this point Cleon was staring aimlessly into space, fork suspended in the air halfway to his mouth, eyes starry, and
"Cleon. You're drooling."
"Oh, uh, sorry, Kel," he said hurriedly, quickly wiping off his chin. Kel rolled her eyes. "What is it with you guys? First it's Neal, claiming that beautiful women—"
"Just one woman!" Neal corrected her.
"…claiming that a beautiful woman has invaded his—"
"Although, she was enough to equal several women…"
"Queenscove! Will you stop? You're making me gag!"
"Sorry, Kel," Neal said sheepishly. She glared at him.
"Both of you, stop babbling on about your romantic delusions and eat your vegetables."
"One question, Kel: why?"
She paused for a moment to think. She had just opened her mouth to say something when the door to the mess hall flew open, radiant, and all conversation halted. A figure stood in the doorway, a lovely—no, beautiful—figure, slim, but with curves, sleek blonde hair falling in loose waves to her narrow waist, a face that would put the queen to shame—was it a goddess?
It shattered the silence with a small giggle. Kel mentally crossed out goddess from the list of things the girl could be.
She took a step into the room. Kel felt a knot in her stomach form and harden. What was it that she didn't like about this girl?
All males in the room felt—well, something else that was already formed harden.
(a/n: ew! I can't believe I just wrote that! Ok, carry on.)
As she stepped further into the room, it became apparent that the glow was just sunlight coming through the open door. The mood in the room became a little, just a lttle, more relaxed. The girl seemed to be looking for something; her eyes locked with Kel's, and she walked briskly over to their table.
Neal and Cleon jumped simultaneously to their feet as she reached them.
"She's mine!"
"Back off, you—you—flowery nincompoop! She was in my rooms!"
"Flowery nincompoop??!? You're the flowery nincompoop, you flailing halibut! And besides, I'm the one that she—well, you know—with!"
[small fistfight ensues, leaving Neal with a split lip and Cleon with possible brain damage. Or wait, it must have been something else…Cleon couldn't possibly have brain damage. That would require a brain.]
"Why, boys," she said in a soft voice, "I hope you haven't been fighting over me." Her huge eyes filled with concern, and the two squires quickly straightened, hands clasped behind their backs.
"What, us," they chorused, "fighting? Uh—no…."
"You mean you don't think I'm worth fighting for?"
"Er—of course we do! That's why we were fighting!"
Mary Sue's hand went to her heart. "You mean you've gone and hurt yourselves over me? Oh, you poor, sweet dears…have my handkerchief." She handed Neal a pink lacy slip of fabric, embroidered with the letters MS, and gave Cleon an appraising look.
"You're going to require a bit more…lucky for you, I'm a healer. Just close your eyes for a moment—this won't hurt a bit…"
[Cleon screams, loudly and shrilly]
[shot of Kaddar at tea in Carthak. Carthakis look around to see where that strange, shrill noise is coming from…]
[back to their table. Note that all plates, cups and bowls have broken.]
"There. See? That wasn't bad at all, was it?!"
Cleon smiled weakly, and she patted him on the head. Her eyes then went to Kel.
"K-Keladry? Keladry of Mindelan?"
Kel gave her a confused look. "Yeah, that's me…how'd you know?"
"Oh, I read the—haha, I mean, lucky guess!" Mary Sue smiled furiously through her blush. "You are the only female squire, after all, though."
"Yeah…yeah, I am. But um—what are you dong here, if you don't mind me asking?"
"You mean this—this isn't where nobles are supposed to get breakfast?" Mary Sue's eyes were welling with tears again. Kel gave her a look.
"Nobles get breakfast in their rooms when they pull the ring. This would be the mess hall, for pages, squires, and visiting knights."
"Hey," Neal interjected, "no need to be rude about it! She's probably new here." Mary Sue smiled, and Kel gave him an indignant look.
"I wasn't being rude!"
Neal scowled. "I didn't like your tone," he muttered. Kel rolled her eyes and looked back at Mary Sue.
"Well, what are you waiting around here for? I told you, this isn't where nobles eat, unless they're in training. And we're going to have to go in just a minute, to the practice yards. And I'm afraid we can't stay back today, because exhibition is all next week, and we really need to practice."
"Well—" she bit her lip—"I—I don't really have anywhere else to go…maybe could I come with you?"
"You're kidding, right? This isn't fun and games. We need to practice. And besides, it's not that interesting, anyways."
"Well, maybe I could practice with you."
Kel raised her eyebrows once again. There was silence for a moment before Owen finally found his voice.
"C'mon, Kel," he nudged his friend. "I'm sure it'll be jolly fun!"
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Ok, ok, I lied. Again. But in case you can't tell, Mary Sue's weapons skills will most definitely be the focus of the next chap…I just couldn't fit it in here. *grumbles*
Hey! Don't yell at me! Be happy! This chapter is FIVE PAGES LONG!!!!
Hmph.
Anyways, as always, review! I shall then be more motivated to post sooner. Or at least, I'll be more likely to be more motivated to…ah, whatever. Just review.