Disclaimer: see Chapter 1

A/N: Sorry that this part took so long…Don't worry; I have every intention of finishing this. Between the holidays and a bad case of writer's block, it has just taken a while… Thanks for being patient.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Kihran stepped cautiously into the Captain's ready room. It had been over a week since he had come aboard Enterprise, and while nobody had been suspicious of him so far, Kihran knew that there was a strong possibility that his deception could be revealed at any moment. He had tried to keep a low profile this past week, avoiding personal conversations with the crew when possible, which was not difficult. Apparently, Lieutenant Reed had not had many close friends aboard the ship, and Kihran's desire for privacy did not seem unusual. He had even been avoiding Ensign Sato since his first encounter with her in the mess hall, despite his strong desire to get to know her better. This morning however the Captain had unexpectedly asked to meet with him. Since the brief discussion in the docking bay, Kihran had not had any real interaction with Captain Archer besides his bridge shifts, which he spent quietly monitoring his station, answering questions only when asked.

As he entered the room, Captain Archer stood waiting. "Malcolm," the Captain greeted him hesitantly.

"Captain," Kihran replied, trying to sound confident. Captain Archer stepped towards him as though to engage him in conversation, then decided against it, and retreated to the opposite end of the room. Something was clearly bothering him.

"Malcolm…" he began, only to stop again. "Malcolm, I guess you've realized that I've been avoiding you…

"Have you?" asked Kihran, surprised.

The Captain looked him in the eyes for the first time since he had entered the room. "The reason I called you here… is to apologize again."

"Sir...?" Kihran asked.

"I should have listened to you about stationing guards around sickbay. I didn't listen, and because of that, you were injured and Phlox was attacked. I should have trusted your instincts."

Kihran thought for a moment before deciding how to respond to the Captain's admission of guilt. "Is that still bothering you? You couldn't have known what would happen. Besides, I was not seriously hurt. It was just a fight. And the Doctor is OK. Besides…"

"It doesn't matter," the Captain stated forcefully. "You could have been seriously injured, Malcolm. And that alien could have done a lot more damage than he did. We didn't know anything about him or where he came from, and I practically handed him free reign of the ship."

"Captain," Kihran said solemnly, "You should not feel guilty for wanting to treat an injured person with respect, and you should certainly not feel guilty for wanting to trust people, and believe that people are good."

"People could have died because of my trust in people, Malcolm." Captain Archer said, very upset.

"But everything worked out OK." Kihran replied.

"Did it?" the Captain replied.

He knows, thought Kihran, tensing and feeling for the knife he had strapped to his arm under the sleeve of his uniform.

"After what happened in the expanse, and all of the missions we've done for Starfleet lately, I think I wanted to trust people again so much, to prove to myself and everybody else that we are a ship of exploration, not a warship… that I put the crew in danger. I'm not sure that I can just go back to exploring the galaxy peacefully Malcolm. We've encountered so many hostile aliens and tense situations… a part of me is always going to be suspicious now, to not want to trust people. And I'm afraid that that part of me is right."

Kihran let out a breath, relieved that he had not been forced to hurt anybody else. He was, however disturbed by the Captain's confession. 'How will he feel if he finds out what I have done? Will he feel responsible for the torture of his officer?' Guilt surged through Kihran for a moment, but he composed himself quickly.

"Captain…" he said slowly, "It is my job to protect this crew from hostile aliens, and to ensure the security of this ship. And while that should be one of your concerns, your main concern should be exploring, meeting new species… promoting diplomacy and peace throughout the galaxy. You made the right decision, not posting a security team. You can't greet people with hostility and suspicion. This was one incident. There will be many more, I'm sure, which will end much more peacefully than this one did. Give it time, Captain. You'll figure things out."

Captain Archer was quiet for a moment, moved by Kihran's statement. Kihran was quiet as well, the small twinge of guilt he had felt now beginning to consume him.

"Thank you, Malcolm," the Captain stated with a small smile. "I think I needed that."

Kihran stood straight for a moment before the Captain dismissed him. He turned and left quickly, wanting to get back to his quarters as quickly as possible so that nobody would see his tears.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The girl could not have been any more than six years old. She crawled towards him slowly, unable to stand or walk, every movement bringing her more pain. She was screaming, crying out into the night for somebody to help her, but no help would come. It was too late, he knew. There was nothing he could do for her now. She didn't recognize him, but then she wouldn't. She couldn't even recognize her own parents anymore, her delirium was so intense. Large parts of her brain had liquefied, as had her other internal organs. He could see that her once full head of hair had thinned and fallen out, and her skin was peeling away in places, burned and raw. She was screaming and he wanted to help her. He wanted to put things right, and make her healthy again. To bring her parents back from the dead. He wanted to resurrect the entire crumbling ruin that stood before him, once a prosperous and lively city. But it was impossible. The damage had been done. So he watched in horror, as the young girl died an agonizingly painful death, her screams echoing in his brain. He had done this. He had created this plague which had destroyed this little girl, and everything she knew. As he watched, the young girl's screams stopped and he knew that she was dead. There were no survivors.

Kihran cried out as he jolted awake, sweating profusely. The sheets were tangled around him, clinging to him. As his awareness returned and he looked around Malcolm's quarters, he began to sob uncontrollably, the dream refusing to fade from his memory. After his meeting with the Captain, Kihran's guilt had not dissipated. It had followed him for the rest of the day, as he tried to put it out of his mind with work on the phase cannons. He had appeared so upset that one of his team had insisted that he go back to his quarters and rest, and that the Armoury could survive without him.

'Pull yourself together,' Kihran thought. 'You shouldn't feel guilty for anything. Kihran Ushku was the one who killed that girl, not you. You are Malcolm Reed, the Chief Security officer onboard the starship Enterprise. Kihran Ushku is being punished for his crimes. Let him feel guilty, not you.'

Somehow those thoughts did not bring him the comfort he had hoped they would.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"Time to wake up!"

Malcolm awoke with a start as the guard shoved him harshly off of the small bed and onto the hard ground of the lab. He coughed roughly, small spatters of blood landing on the floor underneath him before he was yanked up by his hair and deposited back on the bed. "Good morning to you, too." he said defiantly to his tormentor, whose name he now knew was Rakat. He was rewarded with a hard smack across the face, reopening a variety of cuts and scrapes and leaving another bruise on his already mangled face.

"Kiva Dorian expects results today. You have played him for a fool for too long, and I don't expect that he'll tolerate you much longer. When he finishes with you, I will make you pay for your treachery in ways you can't even imagine." Rakat told him.

"When you finally catch the real Kihran Ushku, I'll be glad to see you do that." Malcolm shot back. At that, Rakat shot him a murderous look and stalked out of the small laboratory, the door sealing shut behind him.

'So begins another day in hell' thought Malcolm. He had lost track of how long he had been here. It felt like an eternity. It was only the continued insistence that he was not Kihran and the belief that his ship would come for him and the real Kihran would pay that had gotten Malcolm through so far. Each day passed slowly and seemed endless, the same as the one before it. It always began the same, with him being woken up by Rakat, then left to wait in the lab alone with his misery. Today though there was no wait at all, as the door reopened and another Karatesh entered the lab, this one thinner and taller than Rakat, but no less mean-looking. His name was Tirq and while he appeared menacing, Malcolm knew that Tirq was no threat to him. His presence in the lab had nothing to do with torturing him. Tirq was a scientist.

"Good day, Kihran." the alien told Malcolm as he stepped into the room.

"Not one word of that statement is true." Malcolm shot back.

The alien's responded with a sigh and a shake of his head. "I had hoped that you might be in a more co-operative mood today, Kihran. Dorian is getting very tired of your foolishness."

"So I've been told." Malcolm responded.

In the time that he had been in the lab, Tirq had been a near constant presence. Tirq had apparently been working with Kihran developing the bio-weapon before he escaped, and each day attempted to get Malcolm to help him continue with the research. His attempts always ended the same way: with Malcolm's insistence that he was not Kihran, and his refusal to help with anything. When Tirq's form of persuasion had no effect, Rakat would return to take a more forceful approach. Malcolm was certain that this day would be no different.

"I wish that you would help me, Kihran." Tirq told him. "Once this is finished, there is still a possibility that Dorian will let you go." Tirq began his research for the day, pulling a variety of equipment out of the cupboards, setting up new chemical samples to be tested.

"Do you really believe that?" Malcolm asked incredulously.

"I do," Tirq replied. "I have to."

Malcolm could not help but be confused by what Tirq had said. 'Is he a prisoner here as well?' he wondered.

"There is some food here for you, Kihran." Tirq told him. "Rakat brought it in for you. Eat, and then you can help me with these new tests."

"You know I won't." Malcolm replied stubbornly, attempting to pull himself into a sitting position on the bed. "I couldn't even if I wanted to…"

"… Because you are not Kihran. You are Malcolm Reed of the starship Enterprise." Tirq finished his sentence for him. "I've heard it before, Kihran. This lie is getting you nowhere. Why do you insist on continuing with it?"

"Because it is the truth. Why won't anybody believe me?" Malcolm asked desperately, beginning to feel nauseous.

"Why would we believe you, Kihran?" Tirq asked angrily. "You are known throughout many worlds for your lies and your deceit. You have already lied to all of us once Kihran. Why should we believe anything you say now, especially such an outrageous lie?"

Tirq turned away from his research and stepped towards Malcolm, placing a hand on Malcolm's shoulder. "Please don't make me have to call for Rakat again, Kihran. I hate to watch you suffer this way, because of your own stubbornness."

Malcolm could hear real kindness in Tirq's voice, which made Malcolm cry. The thought of spending another minute with Rakat terrified him, but there was nothing he could do to prevent it from happening. He could not help design a weapon that would destroy thousands of people. Even if he wanted to, he simply didn't have the knowledge that Kihran possessed to do it.

"I'm sorry Tirq… but I can't help you." Saying the words felt physically painful for Malcolm.

Tirq was disappointed, Malcolm could tell. But he recovered from his disappointment quickly and turned back to his research. "I will hold Rakat off as long as I can, Kihran. At least eat something. It will make you feel a bit better."

So Malcolm did as Tirq had asked him and ate quietly, waiting for the inevitable moment when Tirq would call for Rakat. This day would be the same as the others he knew. But soon things would change. He just had to be patient. 'Enterprise will come for me. They'll straighten everything out. And then everyone will believe me when I tell them the truth. I am Malcolm Reed. Kihran Ushku should be here, not me. I don't deserve to be punished for his crimes.'

But as time passed, those thoughts brought him less comfort than they should have.