A/N: Hmm… got nothing really to say – except Angel fans don't expect much of him – I hate the blooding brooding vamp and he's just lucky I don't kill him off.
Thanks to all my reviewers, who waited 'patiently' as I struggled through writer's block and didn't say outright that the last chapter sucked.
Chapter 10 – Introspection
The sun had just set, and the last rays of light were fading away. Even so, Buffy Summers sat in the unlit room – allowing the darkness to envelope her. Her eyes stared forward, as if she could make out something that no one else could. Perhaps she could.
Jack stood in the doorway, silent, knowing that she had sensed his presence the moment he stepped in the room. Possibly even before that. The light from the moon served to make Buffy half-hidden in shadows, rather than illuminate. At that moment she was both in the room, and elsewhere.
Jack wondered where else she was – what place she was looking for.
Buffy spoke without turning, "He called, didn't he."
"Yeah, don't know how Craig managed it, but he got the go ahead from the President. Apparently…we're an elite force codenamed the Pack that he has personally overseen the training of. We ship out to Cheyenne Mountain in a few days – which gives me just enough time to get Hammond's souvenir. What do you get a three-star general I wonder?" Jack mused.
Buffy chuckled softly at that, though the sound barely made it to Jack's ears. He didn't speak, knowing that she would – in time.
"Maybe then I'll get to meet Jack O'Neill."
A small frown played on the colonel's lips.
"Unless I have a clone I don't know about, I'll go with 'huh'?"
"I saw the looks on your teammates' faces, Sir; it was the same as the ones on Xander and Willow's. They weren't seeing Jack O'Neill, their friend – they were meeting, Sir; the man that existed in the same cage as the Pack four years ago."
As much as he wanted to, he knew he couldn't deny it. In the last few days he hadn't been the Jack O'Neill that SG1 had known for the last two years. He was the man who had tortured teenagers in order to train them in the same art; he was the man who had watched his recruits tear at one another until one was dead. To maintain his sanity, he had buried those memories down so deep that they were barely there…but around Buffy and the Pack they came flooding back, along with the man who had been there.
"And who are you?" Jack asked, following Buffy's train of thought. She sat quietly, staring out the window. Seeing vampires or her own demons, Jack couldn't say.
"I killed a man today; someone I knew – even though I didn't like him. I should feel guilty, but I don't. Snyder had seen too much, for the safety of the Pack I couldn't let him live."
O'Neill started at what he felt was an abrupt change in the subject.
"You did what you were trained to do."
"I was trained to kill cleanly and swiftly – not what I did to Snyder. The First One decided to kill Snyder, but I was the one that wanted him to hurt. Not the slayer, not the First One, and not whomever the military was trying to make me into. It was Buffy Summers that tore out Snyder's heart."
"Sometimes torture is necessary, to set an example," Jack ventured, trying to read Buffy's mood.
"I know, that's why the Pack tortured Hathaway; we could have let the guards live but we killed them to show we could kill efficiently. Dr. Hathaway was our proof that we remembered our other lessons just as well. Everything was done to prove to Craig that we could be a valuable resource, and a dangerous enemy if not treated carefully. No – I didn't need to kill Snyder like that."
Buffy slowly got up and turned towards Jack – an emotionless mask covering her face. Walking up to him, she hugged him carefully as if he would break. Confused, Jack returned the hug.
"But I still don't feel guilty," she mumbled into his shirt. She looked up at him with eyes filled with sadness…and acceptance.
"And I think that what humanity I had left died with him."
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Joyce Summers sat surrounded by Buffy's friends, wondering how she was going to tell them that she had her own daughter committed. From the looks on their faces, it was obvious they already knew part of the story. Mrs. Summers sighed and took a deep breath.
"It was after Buffy had broken up with her boyfriend, Pike. She was disappearing for days, staying out late at night, and her father and I were worried. Her behaviour had become erratic, and she wasn't hanging out with any of her friends from school. I guess her father and I had asked what was bothering her too many times when she exploded. She began ranting about her destiny, and vampires, and her dead Watcher…"
"And you thought she had lost it," Faith interrupted tonelessly.
"Yes. So…we took her to see Dr. Hathaway. He was a specialist in teenage psychosis, and he took on Buffy's case as a referral. On his advice, we had Buffy committed. At the time we thought that it would only take a few days for Buffy to realize that she was imagining everything, but…"
"They told us that Buffy had started hurting herself – that every morning they would find her bruised and scratched and ranting about vampires and demons. We were shaken badly, so when Dr. Hathaway offered to transfer her to his personal clinic we were ecstatic. I mean, we were positive that Buffy was getting the help she needed and we would have her healthy and back to us in no time."
Tears ran down the older woman's face, though she made no move to wipe them away. She wasn't really in the room anymore – she was back then, reliving the agony of watching her daughter lose her grip on reality. Now knowing that there had been nothing wrong with Buffy, other than the fact her parents had sent her to a mental hospital.
"After that, Buffy seemed to get better. She stopped talking about vampires and demons but…she changed. I looked into her eyes and I didn't see my daughter anymore. It was like there was a stranger looking out."
Joyce's voice trailed off as she focused on that image of Buffy in her mind; those eyes staring back at her with no feeling. But it passed and Joyce continued on.
"A few months later, there was an escape by some of the patients, and a few days after that Buffy was released. It was like having the old Buffy back at first – that is, until she burnt the school gym down."
Everyone remained silent as Joyce finished her story. Giles placed a sympathetic hand on her shoulder.
"Thank you, I'm sure that was hard for you."
"Yeah, well, that still doesn't explain what's been going on with B lately," Faith spoke, prowling the room like a caged animal. "I mean it's obvious that something dirty was going down there; why else would B be chummy with a military crew-cut who worked as an orderly?"
Joyce looked up confused.
"Mr. O'Connor was in the military?"
"Is, as in the present tense, as in a fake name, as in a secret military operation. Is this ringing any bells?" Faith shouted the last part.
"Faith, I know you're worried about Buffy but taking it out of Mrs. Summers is not going to help matters," Giles reprimanded Faith, who merely shot up her arms and stormed out.
"What was Faith talking about?" Joyce asked anxiously.
"It seems the hospital where Buffy was taken wasn't exactly as it seems. Willow researched their records and found that most of the personnel were, in fact, in the military. Since Buffy's odd behaviour coincides with the arrival of Jack 'O'Connor' and Dr. Hathaway, we believe that they may have been experimenting with behaviour modification. Willow is trying to track down their records, but they seem to have disappeared."
"Dr. Hathaway is here?" she asked surprised.
"Briefly, yes. He came to take Buffy into his custody when…she escaped. I'm afraid I haven't been able to get the details from Buffy just yet," Giles looked embarrassed that he had no idea where his slayer was.
"If you want to find her, you shouldn't wait here," Joyce said slowly, as if she was afraid to say the words. That saying them would make it a reality.
"She has nothing left here to come back to."
**************************************
Faith wondered around the cemetery, idly twirling a stake. The excuse was that she was patrolling for vampires, but deep down she knew she was looking for Buffy. It always seemed like Faith was looking or waiting for the older slayer. One of these days she would stop, and she bet the blonde wouldn't even notice. She had Willow for the best friend; Angel as the boyfriend; Giles as the confidant and support. What did she need Faith for?
The dark slayer felt a tingling in her stomach, and smiled at the thought of a good beating. She turned the corner to see that it wasn't just any vampire she had sensed, but Angel…and Buffy. The two were talking, but by the look on Angel's face it wasn't one he was enjoying.
Oh great, on top of everything else Buffy is going to do the whole 'star-crossed lovers' bit.
With Slayer hearing, Faith was able to hear what they were saying without giving away her presence.
"Buffy, you have to deal with this. I can smell the blood on you," Angel protested.
"Look, Angel, I've dealt, gotten the t-shirt, and moved on. I did what I had to do, so just back off," Buffy growled, trying to get past the vampire.
"What's happened to you?" Angel asked, grabbing the blonde's arm. Buffy looked down at the vampire's hand and gave him a dangerous look.
"Life, Angel, though you've forgotten what it's like by now. Don't challenge me, I am stronger than you and I will not have you challenging me in my territory."
A confused expression crossed Angel's face.
"Challenged? Buffy, you're not making any sense," as soon as the sentence was out of his mouth, a growling could be heard from all around. Appearing as if from the shadows themselves, the Pack appeared. Their eyes glinted with a wildness that Angel recognized – though he had only seen it in the eyes of animals. He turned back to Buffy to see those same eyes staring back at him. Realizing his life was jeopardy, the vampire fled -- wondering what he had just seen this night.
Faith watched the teenagers surround Buffy, touching her with small but deliberate caresses. The older slayer smiled, and returned their caresses with her own. Eventually, she gestured for them to leave and within a heartbeat the area was empty. The dark slayer's heart jumped into her throat when she heard Buffy's voice.
"Faith, I know you're there."
Sheepishly, Faith came out of the shadows and regarded her sister slayer. The older girl seemed the most normal and the most off since the day Buffy had ran out of the library weeks ago. Buffy smiled at Faith, and the dark-haired girl kicked herself when she felt an answering goofy grin come across her own face.
Buffy, for her part, was amused by the emotional turmoil coming from her sister slayer. Ever since her activation, the slayer connection had intensified and Buffy now could almost hear Faith's thoughts. The activation had also brought a level of clarity to the blonde slayer's emotions. She no longer tried to deny what she was feeling, or justify or guilt herself about how she felt. The whole process was pointless – and very human.
As a result, Buffy knew for certain her relationship with Angel was over; it had been for some time. It wasn't love she felt for the vampire, if it ever had been. It had been guilt – guilt for causing Angel to lose his soul, and guilt for sending him to hell. But now she was ready to move on.
"Faith, did you know that for wolves, the most powerful male and the most powerful female would often mate?" Buffy conversationally asked.
"Um…no? What does that got to do with anything?" Faith asked, completely clueless. Buffy just turned to Faith with that same smile on her face.
"I just remembered and thought that it explained quite a few things."
"Like what," Faith asked, staring into the other girl's eyes, trying to figure her out.
"Like this," Buffy said as she pressed her mouth to Faith's in a kiss.
TBC
A/N: If anyone reads author notes, I warned this would eventually be Buffy/Faith (not major but there) so no one yell at me – especially after getting a long chapter