Chapter 4: No White Horses

"I'm sorry Buffy," Giles said, his eyes apologetic, "but it's very clear. After reviewing all your dreams not to mention what Drusilla told you. The Slayer needs her Champion. All the signs point to the fact that he will be needed in, whatever doom is coming."

They were all ensconced in the living room. Buffy, Giles, Xander, Willow, and Dawn. The Slayer and her friends had arrived home raw and exhausted from London, the parting with the Council had been so strained to be nearly down right hostile. Spilling was as smooth and polite as ever but the Scoobies new they were under suspicion, and that things with the Watchers would most likely only become worse with time. Andrew was off at his latest D&D battle. He had been able to beg off research, since, as he explained, he was Dungeon Master, but really because Giles couldn't stand to have him present. They had been researching for two hours, sifting through Buffy's dream journals and old dusty books for any reference to a Slayer's Champion. Buffy, was barely suppressing her irritation, she was a little tired of everyone both inside and outside her dreams telling her about this Champion guy. She was a modern woman dammit! Why did she have to need some stupid guy on white horse?

"Aha!" The sound was a high excited squeak.

"Dawn?" Buffy questioned. Looking to the corner where her younger sister was bouncing up and down with barely suppressed glee.

"I found it, a reference to the Slayer's Champion."

"In what book?" Giles demanded, striding over to the small table where Dawn sat.

"Yeah Dawny, which diary was it?" Xander question from his spot in the armchair where he sat with a venerable tome on his lap.

"Oh please," Dawn rolled her eyes. "Like the Watchers would really know anything about Slayer lore."

Buffy ducked her head, suppressing a smirk, as Xander and Willow, simultaneously tossed their books on the sofa, mirroring expressions of disgust on their faces.

"I do beg your pardon Dawn but—" Giles began, but the young girl quickly cut across his huff.

"This a book Thaisa lent me, it's about early women warrior mythology, you know, Amazons and Artemis Demon's, and stuff "

Willow leaned forward with an expression of interest, Thaisa was the Coven librarian, and she had recently been lending Dawn texts from her private collection. Giles was picking up the book and examining its worn green cover with interest. "Myths and Sagas of the SheWarriors by the Demon Thanois?" he read, a frown creasing his brow. Flipping to the page Dawn had marked he began to read, "One of the oldest and least likely myths, is that of a Slayer's Champion–"

"Hey!" Dawn protested. "I found the info, I should get to do the exposition!"

Giles raised his eyes heavenward, "So sorry Dawn," he smiled with thin patience. "Do you mind if I read it?"

"Well I guess not," Dawn mock huffed, her blue eyes twinkling. "It does sound better in your voice anyway."

"Heaven grant me patience." Giles murmured, ignoring the muffled guffaws of his other young friends he continued. "A Slayer Queen is probably the rarest and most feared woman warrior in lore. There are only three known, in history, and it is unlikely there were more considering a Slayers short life span. For," Here Giles paused with a frown. "For more information on Slayer Queens see Darkardan's Legends .Darkardan's Legend?" Giles paused a far off look in his eyes. "I don't think the Coven has that book, it's written in ancient Pheonician, never been translated, perhaps–"

"Giles." Buffy breathed in exasperation. The older man's eyes snapped back to the book.

"Right. Sorry. The Slayers Champion, is her counterpart, her guardian, her partner in all things. He must be her equal, her anchor. He, or possibly she, is usually a skilled warrior of unusual origin, as he must be, to match her prowess. Most are thwarted early on if not by others, than by the pair themselves as the two can end up killing each other in their early meetings; when the pull of their polarized forces is often misunderstood as a fight for dominance." Here Giles paused for breath, scanning the room to find only blank faces, and Buffy looking at the floor. "A Champion will fight all his Queen's battles, both violent and internal, he is her mediating force, her connection to the otherworld. It is very rare for such a relationship to work as both parties must strive for balance both in the relationship and in each other. This relationship does not always lead to love, but once a Slayer bestows upon the Champion her favor it does form an irrevocable bond, and when love is found in the pairing it is often dangerous and eternal. Though all this is really based on conjecture from ancient lore, not on any solid fact."

Buffy's ears were roaring, she could feel the pulse in her stomach and hear her heart beating in her head. Once her favor is bestowed.

"Well," said Willow slowly. "I guess we better call Angel."

"He does seem the obvious choice." Said Giles reluctantly.

"Wait, wait, Angel?" Xander asked, rising from his seat. We gotta work with Angel? Cause I gotta say, Mr. Broody, probably my least favorite person to save the world with."

"Yes, Xander we are all aware you dislike him, but as I may remind you that is not the issue here." That was Giles, whipping his spectacles off to relieve some of his mounting irritation. He didn't want Angel there either, and Xander wasn't helping.

Everything inside Buffy had gone quite still. My Champion .

The amulet, cold and hard in her palm. "Angel says it can only be worn by a Champion." The way he slowly lowered his hand, then the wonder in his eyes, his face, as she handed him that awful piece of crystal and chain. Blue eyes twinkling at her, masking the depth of the emotion within.

"Been called a lot of things in my time."

My Champion.

She didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Fate was toying with her, playing another of its cruel tricks, and she would never understand why. My Champion. Oh God.

Willows voice suddenly cut sharp and clear across the roaring in her ears. "Should we call him now? It will take a while to make all the arrangements."

That got Buffy's attention."It's not him." It came out a whisper

"Wait," that was Xander, hand held up in his traditional "let's think rationally" gesture. "I still think we should think about this, he's tied to some pretty evil mojo now I mean–

Taking a deep breath Buffy tried again. "It's not him." She croaked.

This time Dawn, heard her frowning as she took in her sister's pale face and wide eyes."Buffy?" She asked with concern. Willow turned

"Buffy?" She echoed, placing a concerned hand on her friend's shoulder.

Xander and Gile's turned to look at expectantly at her, Willow's concern mirrored on their faces.

Buffy took a deep breath. "It's not him. It's not Angel."

"Well thank goodness for that." Xander crowed oblivious to everyone's glares. "If I had to spend another mission with–" He stopped suddenly, realizing his mistake. "But, this is bad. Because, now we don't know who he is." The brunette dropped his arms to his sides in defeat.

Giles sat on Buffy's other side, brow creased in puzzlement. "Buffy, I must admit I'm not exactly crushed at this news, but may I ask how you know this? Angel does seem the obvious choice."

"Because I didn't choose him."

Giles cleared his throat, speaking to her gently. "Buffy, Angel is a Champion of the people, I know having your choices made for you can be frustrating, fate is difficult to accept, and it will be hard having him here, for all of us, but–"

Buffy's head was ringing with silent hysterical laughter. Giles didn't get it, none of them got it. But why would they? They had never known him. Never understood really understood his sacrifice; and suddenly she was very, very angry, because if anyone should understand, it was these people, the ones he'd died to save. She rose abruptly from her seat, cheeks flushed, green eyes snapping with anger.

"I did choose, I chose my Champion, and it's not Angel." Holding up her hand sharply at the question that was about to exit Willow's lips, she continued. "He is a Champion, yes, but he's not my Champion." Fresh pain suddenly laced through her heart, causing tears to spring unnoticed into her eyes. "My Champion is dead."

"Buffy," Giles stammered, his face shocked, "I'm sorry but I don't understand, who?"

Looking at the aghast and confused faces of her friends Buffy felt her rage return. "God, you really don't do you?" Standing in center of the room she surveyed them all with steely eyes. "Who saved me? Who wore that damn amulet into the last battle? Who saved all of you, all of us?" An uncomfortable understanding was beginning to dawn on her friends faces, but she didn't give them a chance to adapt. "Spike. Spike saved us. He saved me, he saved all of you, everyone, God, he saved the world! But most of all he saved me. He saved me when there were no battles, nothing but me to fight. And he won, he always saved me from myself. So I chose him. Spike was my Champion, Spike!" And suddenly it was all too much, and the tears broke and were running down her cheeks. "And he's gone." And with a sob Buffy fled from the room, leaving the stunned group behind.

"Buffy?" Dawn called softly, creeping quietly into her sister's dim room. Buffy was sitting in the center of her bed, knees hugged to her chest, looking very small, her lovely face was impassive, but tears were continuing to drip down her cheeks.

"I'm sorry, Dawny. I know you understood him, what he did, but–"

"I was mad at him Buffy." Dawn said softly, sitting on the bed beside her sister. "What he did, I felt betrayed. By both of you really, I loved you both so much, and you took each other away from me. When he came back, I was furious about what happened, but I was also afraid it would happen again, that he'd take you away from me."

"I'm sorry Dawn." Buffy whispered, fresh tears sliding from her eyes. She a moved bit to put her arm around her sister, stroking her fingers absently through her silky brown hair. "I know that was an awful year. There are so many things I wish I could take back."

Dawn gave her sister a squeeze. "It's okay Buffy, I know. And he really was a hero, I've always known that, even if I stopped believing it for a while."

"Yes he was." Buffy whispered, numbly watching the patterns of light and tree shadow moving on her wall "He's mentioned in the prophecy, he should be hear now." She drew a long shuddering breath. "He would be, if I hadn't killed him."

"Oh please." Dawn said sharply, turning to face her sister with a look of exasperation on her face. "Narcissistic much."

"Wha?" Buffy asked, the tone of Dawn's voice shocking her from her stupor of grief.

"Come on Buffy." Dawn said seriously. "When could anyone ever tell Spike what to do? Yeah he did almost everything for you, but you wanted him to leave didn't you? And he wouldn't, he stayed in that cavern and he stuck it out to the end. He did it for the world, and he did it for you, yeah, but did it for himself too. It was his choice."

Buffy stared in wonder at her sister for a moment, then felt her face crumple with grief, pulling the young girl into her arms she cried quietly into her hair. "I miss him Dawn."

"I know, Buffy, I know." Dawn soothed, running calming hands over her shaking back.. "But he's resting now. That's what he wanted wasn't it?"

"I know." Buffy sobbed. "That's what makes it so awful."

Dawn pulled back to look at her. "Why?"

"Because I know what I have to do."

The three Scoobies were sitting silently in the living room. Giles on the of the edge of the armchair, arms resting loosely on his knees, spectacles in hand as he stared at nothing. Willow curled up in a corner of the sofa, knees curled into her chest, face streaked with tears.

"So, Spike a Champion huh?" Mused Xander where he sat tensely with his arm around Willow, "Who woulda thought?"

Giles looked up the corners of his mouth turning up slight in an absent smile. "It does rather boggle the mind."

"I wonder if–" started Xander. They stopped as Willow suddenly sat up behind him, a mixture of hope and apprehension on her face.

"Buffy."

Xander glanced up guiltily to where Buffy stood impassively at the bottom of the stairs, a silent Dawn behind her.

"Buffy, is there something...we can do." Willow asked nervously.

Buffy's voice was soft and serious, its grim tone carrying undercurrents of her speeches before battle. "Yes, yes, there is." She stated taking in the room with a determined gaze. "Things for all of you to do."

Giles, stood as if to cross to the young woman, than seemed to think better of it and atyed where he was. "Of course, Buffy. Whatever we can do, you know that."

Buffy nodded brusquely. "Thank you."

"So Buff." Xander queried, trying desperately to break the tension that hadn't been relieved. "What's the plan."

"Well according to all these portent things, the Slayer has to have her Champion. My Champions gone." Buffy lifted a determined face to the room. "So we're going to get him back."

The fire popped loudly in the hearth, Buffy watched her friends expectantly, but was met only with stunned silence. "Guys?" She questioned finally, breaking out of her business-like pose.

"Sorry Buff," Xander muttered, "It's just, I was kind of hoping I heard you wrong. Are you serious?"

Buffy nodded curtly. "Really kinda am."

"Buffy...." Willow began, then trailed off worrying at her lower lip.

"Come on Will," Buffy implored, " I need you with me on this."

"Let's hold on just a darn second here." Xander snapped rising to his feet. "I can't believe we're talking about this again." Glancing agitatedly around the room he began to pace. "I mean we've been here before. Resurrection equals much pain. Pain, and angst, and mis-communication, and creepy snakes crawling out of your friend's mouth."

"Buffy," Giles stepped in before Xander could continue his tirade. "I must admit to be quite shocked at this."

Buffy tensed again, all her defenses on alert. "You said it was necessary Giles."

"I said we needed the Champion yes, but I cannot condone–"

"You don't have to condone it." Buffy snapped startling everyone in the room. Ignoring her tight lipped Watcher she turned back to a nervous Willow on the sofa. "Can you do it Willow?"

"Buffy," Willow stammered, "I'm not sure that's the point. I mean, do you really know what your asking? I've never heard of anything like this being done before. We don't have a body, or even ashes; but, do really mean this? I mean you of all people should know, especially after," the red head paused, swallowing the guilt that would never really be gone, "Especially after what happened to you. Spike could be at peace, or somewhere he's happy. We don't even know where he is."

"I don't know."Buffy murmured absently her gaze inward on something they couldn't see.

"Drusilla, she said Spike wasn't where she was going, and that he was.....neither here nor there."

"Oh, Drusilla said," Xander snorted. "Well that's reassuring, I mean here I was being all skeptical."

"Neither here nor there?" Willow asked, a thinking crease forming between her brows. "Could she have meant..." She looked at Giles, who seemed to be looking intrigued in spite of himself.

"The Ether." He finished frowning slightly. "It's a bit thin, but its possible."

"The Ether?" Buffy questioned.

"It's like an in-between place."

"Like Limbo?" Dawn asked.

"Dawn," Buffy stated, "this is serious, and anyway how does referencing party games have anything to do with—Oh," She said in a small voice as she noticed everyone staring blankly at her. "I get it now, continue."

"It isn't a waiting place, it's literally in-between. Between the worlds, the air, molecules, sort of everywhere and nowhere at once, so in a sense it's--"

"All around." Buffy finished for her, hope lighting her face. "So Spike could be there. How? How, do we find it?"

"Well we can't, not really, I mean. The Ether isn't a definite place Buffy, not like another dimension. It doesn't have portals, or a gateway, it's volatile energy."

"Chaotic energy." Giles inserted.

"But people slip through," Dawn added with interest, "I mean in fairy legends, people slip through "thin places" and just disappear, get lost to the world, or something. Nothing about how to find it though."

"No one would want to." Willow said firmly. "The Ether is chaos, some people say it's the place where nightmares come from, that they're energy leaking through the cracks, that it can shape to your dreams and things you're afraid of."

"Like in The Sphere." Xander chimed in excitedly, then winced. "Can we just pretend that Andrew said that?"

With a brief glare at the interruption, Willow continued. "It can't be controlled, it's partly what makes teleportation spells dangerous, you could end up nowhere and get caught in the Ether trying to move between worlds."

"Moving between worlds?" Dawn questioned suddenly. "Like if someone died, and was trying to pass between worlds or something, they could get stuck there too?"

Willow nodded slowly, her eyes on Buffy. "It's possible."

"Willow." Buffy said slowly, a tremor of excitement running through her voice. "Could you find me a way in."

"No, Buffy, it's far too dangerous." Giles had risen from his chair in agitation, lines of worry deep around his mouth.

"Giles!" Buffy growled, then paused as her eyes softened. "I'm going to do this, please don't fight me."

"It isn't not only you I am concerned for Buffy, this could be very dangerous for Willow too. For anyone trying to force there way into the Ether the repercussions could be terrible, for Willow they would be catastrophic. If it took control of her–"

"He's right," Willow cut in. "I can't force it."She rose before Buffy could protest, and continued. "But I can ask it."

"Are your suggesting trying to communicate with Ether." Giles asked incredulously. "I don't lik the idea of you doing that alone."

"Maybe she won't have to." Buffy turned roguish green eyes on her friend. "You think the Coven might help?"

Willow's eyes twinkled back, something of the old spark back in them at the hint of a challenge.

"I think they just might."

Yeesh, I hope that chapter wasn't as much of a headache to read as it was to write. But never fear, now that the exposition is out of the way we can get down to business:

A lot of magic, a few trials, a little romance, and Giles getting knocked unconscious, again. If this sounds good to you, please review. It makes the words flow that much faster.