The next morning there was a pile of fresh vegetables lying on the earth outside the little wooden front door. Dirt clung like sticky crumbs to the ripe bright flesh of the offerings. Harry's eyes met Draco's with despair.
"They've found us. We have to leave." There was a broken, hopeless look in his eyes. They couldn't run forever. They didn't have the strength for that. And where would they go? Maybe it was already over before it ever began.
Draco shook his head. "I don't think so. I mean, they've found us, yes, but it's the centaurs. They never help anybody. I think they want to be left alone just as much as we do."
"Then why help us? Nothing is free." Nothing is ever free. They always want something in return. Price is never negotiable.
"There are seeds here Potter." The tone bordered on the sarcastic one that he'd developed over the years but this was quieter and didn't sting the other boy.
"They want us to stay. So they probably aren't planning on telling anyone we're here." Harry stated the inevitable conclusion.
Draco had knelt to rifle through the vegetables and the little cloth bags of seeds. Now he looked up to meet Potter's eyes. "I don't know how to grow a garden. Did…do you?"
The corner of the other boy's lips quirked up in bitter irony. How strange that in this the Dursleys would help him live. "I'll teach you."
Draco handed a large twisted carrot to Harry, brushing the dirt off fastidiously. He hated dirt and he could never get it all off. "I can sew." He stated diffidently. It wasn't exactly a good will offering but it was as close as he was going to come.
Harry looked vaguely surprised at that revelation but he didn't say anything. Instead he went back inside the doorway and returned a few minutes later with Draco's wand in tow. "Do you feel up for some more transfiguration? We're going to need a shovel to break the ground if we're going to have a garden."
None of the bags of seed were labeled, so they had to guess at the contents as they broke the ground, raked, and planted. It took them longer than they had expected, for the land here was rocky and hard unlike the tame backyard plot Harry was used to. By the time they finished it was late afternoon and they were both sweaty and tired.
They sat with their backs up against the outside wall of their little cabin and surveyed their work. The short rows of furrowed dirt didn't look nearly so impressive as they ought to have. But in their minds the little raised hills shone with their pride and hard work.
Draco was staring at his hands spread passively in his lap, the dirt caked in the creases and under the nail. One of those nails had a little tear in it and the dirt discolored the ivory white half moon to a strange dark color he had never seen on his hands before.
Harry looked over at his companion's silence and noticed his innocent seeming expression. His eyes narrowed thoughtfully and he turned over the large rock by his foot, scooping up the cool earth and the wriggling fat pink earthworm that squirmed anxiously across his palm. He set the small handful into the other boy's hands, the worm trying to burrow into a nonexistent safe spot inside the creases of his skin.
"This is life Malfoy. Sometimes if you just put your hand out on the dirt at the right time you can sort of feel it pulsing in there, all warm and alive."
He'd expected Malfoy to throw it to the ground and wipe his hands on his pants but he didn't.
"I…I've never seen it like this. I've never…" His voice trailed off but Harry understood. Understood the obsession to be clean, to wipe away stains that weren't there but would never come out. But there is bad dirt and there is good dirt. Clean dirt.
Draco looked up at him finally and Harry could see the hot bright pink in his cheeks and across his nose from the sunburn that had scorched the fair skin. It was probably the first the blonde had ever had. Well, there wasn't much they could do about it now.
"Isn't that your owl?" Draco said unexpectedly and Harry turned to see Hedwig flying down from overhead.
"She has practice finding missing people." Harry replied, his throat thickening. He turned his face away for a few minutes, pretended to be examining the forest around them. Draco let him keep that illusion, not questioning the strange statement.
After a few seconds Harry turned back and took the proffered parchment from his owl. It was a copy of the Daily Prophet.
"Say, it appears Dumbledore's taken a leave of absence."
"What?" Now Draco let his curiosity have full reign. How could he resist the very Slytherin smirk in Potter's voice?
"Oh yes. It appears Professor Snape went to see him last night in a private meeting and returned to tell everyone the Headmaster was taking a brief leave of absence."
"Guess he got our pensieve."
"Doesn't seem to have handled it well."
"Poor man." Draco's voice carried anything but sympathy. He turned suddenly fierce eyes on his darker haired companion. "You're not sorry, are you?" he demanded.
Harry shook his head. "No. Maybe we did it out of vengeance but turn about is fair play."
"Guess Granger didn't make a nancy out of you yet."
Harry leaned his head back to catch the sun and grinned. "You remember that time in second year after the Chamber of Secrets opened when Crabbe and Goyle came into your dorm acting so strange?"
"Crabbe and Goyle are strange. I can't say I particularly noticed. Why?"
"It wasn't really them. Hermione got Ron and me to take Polyjuice potions to see if you were the heir of Slytherin."
"Really?" The blonde looked flabbergasted and Harry wondered if he was going to get mad. Instead he suddenly burst out laughing uproariously, holding his sides tightly. "Oh, that's rich! Who'd your third musketeer impersonate?"
"Well, she thought she already had her hair sample but she accidentally got a cat hair instead…" He'd been worried for her at the time but now Harry had to let out a chuckle at the picture of Hermione as half cat. She had looked pretty strange.
Malfoy wiped at his watering eyes. "I haven't laughed so hard in ages! Who would have expected Little Miss By-The-Rules to be a criminal mastermind?"
"Oh, you'd be surprised."
"I suppose I should be honored that you thought I was the heir."
"But you're not." Harry said shrewdly.
Draco smoothed his pants unconsciously, having discarded the handful of dirt from earlier. He didn't seem to realize that his little habit was in fact putting his pants in worse state. "Maybe I don't like people thinking I'm capable of that. I don't…didn't…don't know how to be any different though. You…funny, but this is the best conversation I've had with anyone for as long as I can remember. The other houses are all afraid of me and my own house is full of fawning bootlicking little death eater clones. Well, not all of them but it's hard to tell which ones and it's safer not to guess but just to assume they all are. If…he'd told me to do what you thought…" It was unclear if he was referring to Voldemort or his father but it didn't really matter.
"What about Crabbe and Goyle? Or Pansy and Blaise? You always seemed close with them."
He shrugged dismissively. "Pansy and Blaise are too smart not to keep a close eye on them. And Crabbe and Goyle let me boss them around." A heady feeling for someone who had never had control, even over themselves. Curiously, Draco turned to Harry. "Would you have opened it if the old man had told you to? Before whoever else opened it I mean."
Harry frowned. "Hypothetically, if he had asked me I probably would have. He has a way of making everything sound like the only reasonable choice. He makes you feel like this silly little child being cosseted."
A heavy sigh stirred blonde hair. "So we both would have done it if we'd been told."
"Yes."
"We had to leave, didn't we?"
"Yes."
"How will we do this on our own? They can't…they can't tell us what to do. I always…make the wrong decisions. I can't…I won't be able to…" He was trying not to hyperventilate and failing.
Harry began rubbing firm circles on the other's back and his tone was deadly earnest. "That's exactly the problem Malfoy and you know it. This is our life and they can't just use us and control us for the rest of our lives or we won't exist at all. I can't keep living like this. I can't keep looking over my shoulder for the next blow or the next revelation that throws my whole life down around my knees again. I can't wait for the next person to die because I was kept in the dark and everyone thought it would be better for me not to know. And you can't live your life trying to make your father happy or scrabbling not to get killed by everyone you know. And you know that's what would happen. You would join Voldemort and be dodging knives from both your own side and the other side too. We have to…live for ourselves. We have to…live."
Draco had calmed somewhat. "You sound funny when you say that."
Harry swallowed, thinking of the prophesy about his claim to life and Voldemort's. "It's something I can't really talk about."
"A secret."
"Yes." He allowed surprise to enter his voice. "Ron and Hermione never noticed." But you did.
"You only let them see what you want them to."
"Maybe so. They wouldn't understand any of it. Sometimes I think Ron's still half in awe that I'm bloody Harry Potter and besides, he's got this great family where nothing ever really goes wrong. Hermione, well, she would try to make it some sort of textbook formula or something. Put distance between it. They wouldn't mean to but that's just how it would work out."
"Hmm. I wouldn't have anyone to tell."
"You told me."
"I didn't really."
"You did." Harry insisted.
"And you told me."
"I did."
They sat in companionable silence for a long while, neither feeling the need to speak but just enjoying the rare peace they were so unused to.
"How will we continue to learn magic?" Harry asked after while, watching the shadows lengthen across their precious garden.
Draco shifted comfortably. "Your newspaper there probably has ads for correspondence courses. I used to take them when I was younger. My fa-" He faltered but forced himself to go on. "My father didn't want strangers in the house discovering his connection to the Dark Lord."
"Hmpf. As if everyone didn't already know."
"But he can be subtle about some things. Watch and see what the papers say about me."
"You mean since everyone back there will think you're dead?"
"I'll bet you that my name never even makes it into Looney's dad's paper."
"Do you think mine will?" The tone was too innocent, for while he would never hope for anyone to find him, he also hoped that they would care enough to look for him. He knew he had friends but sometimes he wondered how much that really meant. Sometimes he couldn't really believe that anyone would care.
Draco's eyes showed neither pity nor spite. They were cool and emotionless. "No," he said. "Dumbledore wouldn't want to start a panic in the wizard world by telling them their savior is gone and, besides, it would reflect badly on him that he lost you. If anyone asks he'll make up some cock and bull story about you being moved to a secure location."
Harry didn't say anything, not sure if he was upset by that news or not. Would Hermione and Ron question Dumbledore? Why would they? It had taken Harry so long to even begin to doubt him. But it hurt that they wouldn't be looking for him. He shook his head at his confusing thoughts and didn't refuse the comforting hand on his shoulder.
Neither name made the papers.
Author's Note: I realize that the comment about clean dirt might make it sound like Harry was sexually abused at some point but I didn't really intend it that way. I think that having Voldemort around and watching Cedric die, plus all the emotional abuse that's gone on would tend to make one feel dirty enough. I'm not ruling out the possibility though. And you can make what you will of Draco. Anyway, please review!