Disclaimer: Me own the boys? Yes, of course. Ever wondered why you haven't seen em for a while?
(laughs maniacally) Eh heh…only joking….
(gets chased by vicious fangirls) I WAS JOKING!!!!!
Author's Note: This fic is not just mine, it's written by my good friends Kookie Dough and Panda-Monium as well. I know that this has been probably been done before. It was a hot and steamy day in Australia and the evil spirits of anime took us over! That's our excuse anyway…
Read this fic: Whilst drinking a double chocolate latte and listening to I Am the Walrus, by the Beatles of course. That should put you in the right frame of mind to read. (winks)
It was a dark and stormy day. The boys where thoroughly sick of having nothing to do, especially Duo. Unfortunately for the rest of them, Duo had an idea.
"Hey guuuuyyyyyyssss….." Duo purred innocently.
Of course, the other boys knew Duo was less than innocent. They all tried to either back away or ignore him.
Duo, however, continued undaunted.
"I have an idea! And since we've all got nothing to do…"
At this, Heero decided that the open door to the right looked very inviting. He tried to quickstep it out of the room, but collided with Trowa, who was doing the exact same thing. Unfortunately their collision gave Duo just enough time to close and lock the door, and every other escape route he could find. Quatre whimpered in the corner nervously.
Duo began clearing the floor.
"Let's play Truth or Dare!"
10 minutes later all the boys were sitting in a circle on the ground, having been bullied or bribed by a very persistent Duo. Heero however, was being held down by Trowa and Wufei who figured that if they had to do it, he had to as well.
"Well," Duo started excitedly, "Since Heero, you are so enthusiastic about this, you can go first!' Heero mumbled something intelligible in Japanese.
"Now, now, no swearing! This will be fun!"
Heero reached for his self-destruct detonator and pushed the button. Duo laughed.
"So that's what I was cutting!" Heero groaned.
"Now Heero, Truth or Dare?"
Heero weighed his options up for a moment, then considering his relationship with Relena, decided. "Dare"
Duo clasped his hands together, "Excellent!"
This was not a good sign from where Heero was sitting.
Duo looked around the room for inspiration, a malicious smile on his face as his eyes rested upon Trowa.
"Okay, I dare you," He paused for effect, "To KISS TROWA!!!!" Trowa's eyes widened in horror. Heero, however, was more vocal with his distress.
"WHAT? THAT'S NOT FAIR!"
Everyone looked at Heero, shocked at his outburst. Duo just chuckled.
"Who said it had to be fair?"
Wufei grabbed the end of Duo's plait, pulling a knife from somewhere, "Baka, if you don't want to be physically scarred and lose this rat tail you've been accumulating over the years, then I suggest you change the dare. You have a twisted sense of humor, and I don't need this scene you're creating to be imbedded in my nightmares for the rest of my life!"
Duo twisted to get free, but Wufei's hold was iron. Quatre, meanwhile, left the room inconspicuously to splash his face with water, after that nasty image of his Trowa being kissed by Heero.
"Oh Wufei! You're no fun!"
"Stop whining baka and change it!"
"Okay, okay! I'll change it!" He thought for a moment….
"Okay, here. I'll change it that no dares will include anyone in this room, or involve anything physically scarring." He stroked his plait lovingly as he spoke. He tried to think of a new dare for Heero.
"How about….Heero, you have to kiss Quatre!"
At this, Wufei jumped out his seat, brandishing his knife. Duo threw his hands up in defense.
"What? He's in the kitchen, he's not in this room…Okay, okay, I was only joking…Touchy!"
Quatre crept back into the room slowly, having heard his name somewhere in that conversation.
" Umm…What were you guys talking about?"
Heero just looked up, annoyed, "You don't want to know."
Quatre just smiled slightly, "Okay!"
Duo suddenly interrupted, "Ah ha! I have thought of the perfect dare for you!"
He walked around the table and loomed over Heero, smiling ear-to-ear. "You HAVE to do it though! It's like your mission!"
Heero rolled his eyes, "Okay…"
Duo bounded out of the room for a moment. He came back with a lot of strange things in his arms. To Heero, they all looked strangely and horribly familiar.
"Oh no….not that…Anything but that…."
Duo's eyes glinted evilly.
"Oh yes, you promised to do it!"
He stood up onto the table. "Heero Yuy, your dare is to put on Relena's fluffy blue party dress, make up and everything," He paused, and lent closer to Heero's horrified face, "And walk through the mall, to buy me some milk!"
An hour later….
Wufei and Trowa dragged a defeated looking Heero back home.
"Wow," said Quatre, "I can't believe someone actually asked him out!"
Duo just smirked. "Thanks for getting us that milk Heero!"
Heero looked Duo in the eye, "You're dead Maxwell. Who the hell's next?"
Once back home, and happily back to normal, the Gundam boys had again taken their places in the circle. They waited for Duo to ask the next victim.
Wufei sighed impatiently, "So who's next in this twisted little game of yours Maxwell?"
"Well," Duo started, "Now that you ask, You are!"
Wufei shut his mouth very quickly.
"So, Truth or Dare?"
Wufei thought for a moment, "Well, after Yuy's stunt, I pick Truth."
Duo didn't even have to think for this one.
"Well then, here's your question, and you have to answer it truthfully! If you don't, it would be dishonorable!" Wufei raised an eyebrow suspiciously.
"Just give me the question, Maxwell."
Duo seemed to lean in as if to pounce, "Okay then Mr. Eager! Here's your question; Isn't it true that," He paused dramatically, " That Meiran didn't fuck you any?"
Wufei looked outraged, "WHAT? YOU SICK BASTARD!"
Duo didn't flinch, "Just answer the question, Wu-man!"
Wufei tried to stand to leave, but Heero pushed him abruptly back into place.
"I don't think so. Not after what I've been through Chang…" He gave Wufei one of his famous death glares, "Answer the question!"
Wufei shrunk back, mumbling under his breath.
"What was that?" Duo got closer, "She didn't! I so knew it! No wonder you didn't like her!"
Behind them, Quatre was solemnly counting notes into Trowa's hand.
Wufei stood up to strangle Duo, "HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY NATAKU!"
Duo ran to stand behind Heero, for protection. "Settle down Wu-man, I was joking! And besides, you've answered your question now. So…."
He walked straight up to Quatre. "You're next!" Quatre whimpered.
"Truth or Dare!"
Quatre thought about all the horrible things that Duo could make him do. An image of himself having to waltz through a field of daisies naked in front of the town came to mind. He shuddered.
"Okay, Truth."
Duo pushed Quatre into a chair. "Right then! Listen closely Q-man…"
Duo looked around the room for a moment before his eyes rested, once again, on Trowa.
"Quatre R. Winner; Is it not true that you…like Trowa Barton!" Both Trowa and Quatre squeaked.
Quatre tried to avoid the question, "But…I….I don't understand your question!"
"Fine, let me make it clearer for you; Do you Quatre have gay fantasies about Trowa?"
Quatre was desperately seeking an escape, but Wufei and Heero simply glared at him to even try it.
Duo sighed impatiently, "Fine. Trowa, the lie detector please!"
Trowa regretted having promised to get it for him now. He really didn't want to know Quatre's answer.
Duo quickly hooked it all up to him. Asking him again, "Quatre, do you want to fuck Trowa?"
Quatre turned white, "Hey, that's a different question! Pick one!"
"Okay, here is the one I pick; do you want to fuck Trowa?"
Quatre realised too late his mistake. "Ummm….no…"
The lie detector proceeded to go crazy.
Duo jumped up and down in glee, "He's lying, he's lying! It's true, I so knew it!"
Quatre shriveled, "OKAY, okay, okay, it's true!"
Trowa looked the most horrified he'd ever looked, "I…have to excuse myself for a moment." He proceeded to exit quickly.
"Hey wait a second…" Duo looked up from his new favourite machine, "Get him back in here! He's next!" Wufei and Heero gladly did just that.
"Okay…" Duo said to the restrained Trowa, "Truth or Dare?"
Trowa looked at Heero and Wufei, "What did I ever do to you?"
Heero tightened his grip, "I didn't think your memory was that bad, Mr. Sure I'll Help Put The Dress On."
Trowa sighed in defeat, succumbed to his fate, "Fine. Dare." Duo swung around to look for inspiration once more.
Trowa whispered under his breath, "Dare. I have too many secrets…." Luckily Duo didn't hear him.
As Duo paced the room, he suddenly jumped up; "I have it! Trowa Barton, I dare you to get rid of that ridiculous bang!"
Trowa looked hurt, "Ridiculous? At least my hair isn't long enough to put Rapunzel to shame…"
Duo ignored him, as he noticed Wufei unsheathing his knife again, "Heh, heh, only joking! Umm…let's see…." He disappeared for a moment. Trowa shuddered remembering the last time his braided friend had disappeared.
When said individual returned, he was holding a small pink bag. Trowa cocked an eyebrow, the one not obscured by the bang.
"Trowa…I have a perfect dare for you!" Duo purred.
"You, Trowa Barton, must walk along a tightrope!"
Trowa simply shrugged, "Sure. I can do that." Heero and Wufei both looked cheated.
Duo raised a hand; "I'm not finished yet! Trowa, you must walk a tightrope….in Catherine's underwear!"
Trowa opened and shut his mouth several times. Finally, in a very controlled voice, he said, "Fine. On one condition; Quatre is not watching!"
Quatre put down his video camera sadly, "Awwww…."
Duo threw the pink bag to Trowa, "Well then, hurry up! Give us a yell if you need any help!" Trowa simply stared menacingly.
When Trowa returned, Quatre was safely locked away in the kitchen. His yelling could be heard throughout the house, however.
Duo led his next victim outside, where the tightrope had been secured. Trowa reluctantly took off the bathrobe he had been wearing. He looked ridiculous in his sister's favourite black underwear.
"You look ridiculous in your sister's favourite black underwear." Wufei stated the given.
Trowa simply stared. How'd Wufei know it was Catherine's favourite pair of underwear? He decided he didn't want to know right now.
Duo cleared his throat, "Okay Tro! Time to start the show!" Trowa climbed up the tree and stepped onto the tightrope. Once there, he nearly fell off when he realised Duo had picked a place in perfect view of the neighbour's 14-year-old daughter's pool party. The 20 or so girls attending, having been pre-warned by Duo, sat waiting expectantly. They even cheered once they realised that that "Tall, dark and silent" man they'd spotted through the window earlier had finally gotten up onto the tightrope.
"Stop Trowa!" Duo swiftly ran out of the house, climbing up the tree and handed Trowa a lovely pink and green parasol. Duo winked and quickly jumped back down the tree, shouting over his shoulder, "Don't forget your balance!"
Trowa was half tempted to throw the parasol back at the braided idiot, but then saw that he'd led a blindfolded Quatre out into the yard. There he was starting to undo the knot at the back of the blindfold. Trowa gestured to Duo wildly to stop. Duo smiled and motioned the putting up of the parasol to Trowa. Trowa turned back to his task and grudgingly put up his girly parasol. The girls cheered madly, amid squeals of "He's so cute!" Trowa shuddered, and stepped forward along the tightrope.
10 minutes later, Trowa was already off the tightrope and dressed normally. Quatre had run next door to ask if anyone had taken a picture. He came back looking sorely disappointed.
"Well," said Duo, dusting off his hands, "That was fun guys! And I guess Trowa's stunt concludes tonight's game! I guess I'll just go to bed now, it is getting late…."
The other four boys were suddenly blocking all his exit paths.
"What? Something…wrong?" He asked nervously. He didn't like the evil gleams in their eyes.
"We've done everyone alright, except for…..you." Trowa said in a strangely out of character tone.
"Hey, you guys! You wouldn't go all sadistic on me now, would you?" He smiled in what he thought was his most charming smile.
"That you doubt we would surprises me," said Heero, loading his gun. Wufei stepped forward, brandishing his sword this time. Trowa and Quatre both lunged for Duo's arms, holding them painfully behind his back. Heero pressed the barrel of his gun to Duo's chin.
"This is pay back, Maxwell."
Author's Note: HA HA! Now if you're all good and review, I might just tell you all what they do to little Duo-chan! SO REVIEW FOLKS!
Kookie Dough: Please note that we were all high on sugar, air, and only god knows what else when we wrote this.
Panda-Monium: Yes we were, so please GOMEN NASAI!!!
Eyslk: Anyway, hope you enjoyed it! Reiview! Until next time….
:::BYE!:::