In cold blood

Written by Becca

Disclaimer: I own nothing you recognise and most things you don't.

Summary: From the word go, Harry's summer goes downhill and he sinks into a deep despair. With no hope and the resurrection of Lord Voldemort, Harry does what any normal teenager would do in those circumstances; he tries to take his life. When he awakes he finds himself in a family who seem to welcome him openly. He has changed, he is no longer human and yet he still has to defeat the darkest lord of the century...will he stand alone or will he find, in this family, what he had always desired...Love and affection?

Chapter Eleven

Harry awoke held tightly in strong arms and he cracked an eye open and then just stared at his lover with a shy smile on his face. He recalled all they had done the night before and blushed slightly; they had made love a total of four times before they fell asleep and Severus had shown him things that he didn't even know were possible. Harry pressed a kiss to his sleeping lovers cheek and just watched him for a bit before looking at the clock. It would be dinnertime in ten minutes and one of them ought to make an appearance at least.

With a sigh, Harry nudged his lover awake and smiled as those dark eyes fell on him immediately, a beautiful smile twisted at those lips and Harry grinned before kissing him firmly "Its nearly dinner time. I – err – I thought at least one of us should make an appearance," he said and Severus groaned before pulling him closer, he nuzzled into Harry's hair for a minute before sighing

"I suppose you're right. If we don't I'm sure we'll have your mother breaking down the door if not Albus. Come on we should get washed" he said and then pouted before grinning impishly "Join me in the shower?" he said and Harry laughed but didn't resist as he was picked up and carried through to the bathroom.

They showered together and took a little detour, which involved quite a bit of conditioner and a lot of moaning before they dried and dressed. Harry stopped outside of Snape's quarters and as they were going in different directions, he wanted to say goodbye. He turned to his lover and kissed him shyly before stepping back

"I – thank you. I had a wonderful night," he said and Severus smiled before pulling him in to a deeper kiss. Unlike the others this one was slow, gentle and loving. When they broke apart for air, Severus cupped his loves cheek and smiled beautifully at him

"I should be the one thanking you. You are divine Olwë and I hope we have many, many more times together. I love you," he said sincerely and Harry kissed him again on the cheek

"I love you too" he said softly before turning and walked off down the corridor. He was nearly skipping and the grin on his face couldn't be wiped off by anything. He changed from his tuxedo into just ordinary muggle clothes and then headed down to the Great Hall quickly, he was already late for dinner.

As soon as he entered the Hall, his eyes flickered up to the head table and he saw his family all watching him with smirks on their face, Severus's eyes were smouldering with lust again and Harry blushed before ducking his head. He sat at the Gryffindor table and groaned when Hermione jumped onto his knee immediately and then slapped him

"Where have you been? You've not been back all night!" she screeched as she went to slap him again. Harry sighed and caught her wrist, he could see out of the corner of his eye that his mother was about to come down and he shook his head at her before glaring at his friend

"Hermione. Where I have been is none of your concern, if you hit me again, then that's the end of whatever bit of friendship we have left ok?" he said seriously and Hermione stared at him for a minute in complete shock and then to everyone else's surprise, including Harry's, she dragged his head forward and kissed him firmly.

Severus was seething up at the staff table and when it didn't look like Granger was going to let his Harry go, he jumped to his feet, ignoring the satisfied smirks of Harry's family and stalked down to the Gryffindor table. He grabbed Harry's arm and pulled him to his feet, making Hermione fall and hit floor hard, and then he crushed their lips together, in front of everyone. Harry didn't particularly care though and he melted against that body, opening up to his lover.

When they broke apart, Harry noticed everyone was staring and Hermione hadn't even bothered to try and get up off the floor. Severus sneered at her before pulling Harry closer "Don't touch what is mine" he snarled and then pulled Harry up to the head table and sat the boy on his knee, still getting stared at by everyone.

Harry bit his lip and watched as Hermione ran from the room in tears. He shifted slightly on Severus's knee and turned to see all the teachers were staring at him, his family smirking, Remus and Sirius in complete shock, Dumbledore with twinkling eyes and the others just stuttered soundlessly. The students weren't better off though and Harry sighed

"You could have been a little more gentle with Hermione Sev, she didn't know" he whispered but Severus just grinned, completely satisfied with himself

"I've had to watch that girl slap you, sit on your knee, slap you again and then kiss you. I think I restrained myself remarkably well all things considered," he said cheerfully and then fed him some strawberries on a spoon. Harry sighed and leant back against that chest, resting he back of his head on Severus's shoulder as he opened his mouth to accept the fruit and then giggled when some dripped down his chin. Severus smirked and licked it off before getting some more.

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Later that night, Harry found himself wandering under the stars, thinking about all that had happened in the last few days. In all truths, he was dangerously close to being discovered. It was about time he stopped fearing other people's reactions now anyway and his family and Severus would stand by him if nobody else did. Things would be much easier if he didn't have to hide anyway and so he made up his mind to tell Dumbledore, Remus and Sirius tomorrow.

He sighed and sat down in his favourite spot by the lake as he imagined the many reactions he would probably get the next day. A part of him was looking forward to it; a clear conscience of sorts but the rest of him was terrified of their rejection. He didn't think old man Dumbledore would reject him though, not when he was so close to Severus and it was obvious he wasn't prejudice against all other vampires as he had given his family a job.

He heard someone coming closer and smiled when his sister sat next to him. Anéthiel took his hand and grinned at him before leaning her head on his shoulder and staring across the lake. "Mum tells us you're coming clean soon," she said after a while and Harry nodded

"I am, tomorrow" he said and then paused "Besides, its annoying being called Harry all the time, when I've only just got used to my new name" he said and Ané snorted before shaking her head

"Do you want any of us to be with you when you tell them?" she asked but Harry sighed and stared up at the stars

"No. I think its something I need to do on my own, you know?" he replied eventually and then closed his eyes, hugging his sister closer as they fell into a comfortable silence.

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Well, the time had come. Celeste had made sure that Remus and Sirius would be in Dumbledore's office and so now Harry was stood outside the gargoyles and then took a deep breath. He was beginning to wish he had asked his family to come with him but he just shrugged and then gave the password, his muscles tense and his skin paler than usual. He walked up the stairs and then knocked on the door, entering when called.

Sirius and Remus were there but so was the four heads of houses, including Severus. Harry stilled when he saw them all before he forced a tight smile and took the offered seat. Dumbledore was studying him closely and he pushed a cup of tea across to him before he spoke "I hope you don't mind having everyone here Harry, but I have a feeling they will need to know this anyway. If it's easier, you can just tell us and I will inform them later" he said quietly but Harry shook his head and bit his lip.

"I – no. Its fine" he said and then took another deep breath before smiling at the headmaster "I guess its time now then. I'm as ready as I'll ever be," he added and Albus smiled before leaning over and squeezing his hand supportively

"No matter what Harry, I'll always be here for you" he said firmly, Harry nodded and his eyes flickered to Remus and Sirius for a minute before he bit his lip again

"Well. The easiest thing to start with I suppose is my being a vampire," he said and everyone except Albus, Severus and Harry jumped to their feet and started talking at once. Severus waved his wand and muttered under his breath, effectively silencing everyone before they could say anything they would regret

"I think you should all listen to him," he said firmly and Albus nodded

"Sit back down and be careful with your words," he said sternly, looking at Sirius in particular before he smiled and took Harry's hand again "And how did you come to be turned Harry? Who turned you and why?" he asked and Harry bit his lip again. He lowered his head before pushing his sleeved back and holding out his wrists for the headmaster to see

"I – it was that night I disappeared. I knew I wasn't going to make it to the school year one way or another. My uncle would have killed me if I didn't. I just, I wasn't thinking clearly and all I could see when I closed my eyes was Cedric and Seamus and then my uncle found me outside and he – and then he locked me out and I just had enough and then I did that." He paused for a minute, still not looking up "My family were watching from the shadows, trying to decide which side would have their loyalty and my brother Marius turned me just before I died...or well...I don't know, some would think being a vampire is classed as dead" he said shrugging weakly.

Dumbledore gently took Harry's hands into his own and he trailed a finger down the thick scars and back again before looking him in the eye "Harry. Don't be ashamed, I love you and you don't know how relieved I am Marius was there for you. I know immortality was probably the last thing you wanted after trying to kill yourself but Merlin am I glad. I'm not angry or disappointed in you my boy, I completely understand" he said and then pulled him into a hug "What happened then?"

"Well I woke up nearly a week later at home, my father had already been to secure jobs so that they didn't have to leave me. My mum told me everything and then I spent another week in the library reading up on vampires to see what I was. After a while, it wasn't that hard to accept, I mean, I know I'm needed now, I know my friends and my family need me as I need them and I know that in the end, I'm going to be the one to kill Voldemort" he said and then smiled softly

"I was given a choice, don't think that I was held there against my will. I was being offered something I had always desired and I decided I needed to think about it before I made any decisions. I spent the rest of the summer getting to know my family and after a few weeks it felt like I had known them all my life and had come to care for them. I love them all now and am happy with them but, I guess I was scared the rest of my family would...reject me when they found out" he said and then bit his lip

"Its a lot easier for me to accept than for others to accept me. Then when Hermione started acting all weird and protective, I realised that she wasn't going to understand. Ron, well Ron's my best friend, my brother even but he can be very impulsive and then when Siri was saying that vampires are bloodthirsty monsters I saw that he wouldn't understand either. I know it's not easy for one to change their beliefs when they have been taught differently all their life." He sighed again and smiled when Severus pulled him onto his knee and kissed his neck

"But my mother and sev said to me that people will accept me in time if they truly love me and I hated lying to you all after everything you've done for me. Now, well, I'm not ashamed of who or what I am. I don't regret anything I've done because if I hadn't tried to kill myself that night then I would not be part of a family as wonderful as mine now" he said and finished with a shrug. Albus smiled at him and Harry noticed the other teachers had tears in their eyes. Severus removed the charm on them whilst the headmaster pulled Harry into a tight hug and then he smiled

"Got room for a Grampa in there?" he asked, pressing his hand over Harry's heart. Harry squealed and threw his arms around the old mans neck

"Always" he whispered and then turned to look at Remus and Sirius "There's room for more...if you're interested" he said quietly, fidgeting. Remus stepped forward without hesitation and wrapped his arms around Harry's waist, pulling him closer.

"Definitely Harry, I'm so sorry" he said and Harry grinned at him and kissed his cheek

"Me too...mum gets a little overprotective sometimes," he said as he touched the werewolf's nose and winced. Remus laughed along with the others and Harry looked up at Sirius

"Harry, what's the name of your parents?" Sirius asked, his expression blank for once and Harry swallowed hard

"Celeste de Constrella and Armand van Alberict" he said quietly and Sirius nodded

"Then your godfathers someone else because it certainly isn't me" he said before turning on his heel and leaving the room. Harry bit his lip and stared after him

"Harry? Harry?" Severus called gently but Harry didn't take any notice "Olwë, come here love" he said, coaxing the boy into his arms "He'll come round, you know that. You expected him to be difficult," he whispered and Harry sighed before nodding

"Olwë?" Remus asked, arching an eyebrow and Harry blushed, ducking his head

"I – my family gave me a name. I'm Olwë Maeglin Melwasúl now and my nickname is Rúmil" he said and ducked his head. Severus laughed and kissed the top of his head before explaining what it meant.

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Well, that was over. All things considered it went well really. So then why did he feel so empty? Dumbledore and Remus accepted him, the other teachers accepted him...everyone did but Sirius. His godfather, one of the only things that kept him stable through his fifth year. Harry sighed and pushed himself to his feet, maybe if he went and talked to the man then he would understand. He pulled the marauders map from his trunk and looked to see where Sirius was then folded it in his pocket when he saw the astronomy tower.

He wondered whether he should perhaps give him some time alone but his own sanity couldn't really take that and so he jogged up the several stairs. He had talked to his family since but had insisted that he wanted to be alone for a while. They understood anyway and so at least he wasn't pissing anyone off just yet except Sirius. He turned the corner and just stood in the doorway leading out to the tower to just watch his godfather stare up at the stars and he bit his lip and the tear stains that streaked down those cheeks

"Lily and James will always be my parents Siri," he said quietly, stepping outside. "They will always hold that place in my heart and neither Celeste nor Armand are trying to take their place." He but his lip when Sirius didn't even turn to him and sighed, "Siri, don't you see though? I'm immortal now; I'm going to be walking this earth for a long time unless Voldemort gets lucky." He said and reached out to touch his godfather's shoulder

"Please Siri, I need you to accept me, accept what I am. I – I'm scared of losing you, I need you" he whispered and lowered his head when the man still didn't even look at him let alone speak. His shoulders slumped and he closed his eyes, trying to fight back the tears. "You're all that kept me here for my fifth year. I'm scared of losing you to Voldemort but I'm terrified of losing you because of this. Celeste is my mother yes and I love her but don't think I've forgotten about my real parents, I never will. Sirius, just because I have family now does not mean I do not want or need you" he turned to leave

"I love you. I love you so much and I was scared, I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner but I was scared you would hate me and now you do and – I'm sorry. I love you and I will always be here for you but I – I understand" he finished, letting his tears fall. He felt a hand on his shoulder and tensed as he was spun around again and then Sirius was in front of him, crying his own tears as he pulled the boy into a hug

"I don't hate you Harry, Merlin I could never hate you. I love you so much but I thought – I thought you didn't need me anymore and I hated that and then I didn't know what to do. I'm glad your happy Harry, really I am. Its about damn time is all... Don't leave me. Promise you wont leave me?" he asked and Harry buried his head in his godfathers shoulder

"Never. Never" he whispered