Author's Notes: How will Snape react to the mundane aspects of muggle
life? How will he react to arriving in a large muggle city, in a foreign
country no less? He's not a happy camper, and has no desire to play
tourist. Mira takes matters into her own hands when she realizes just how
badly he needs to relax.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Nope. None of it.
Chapter 21: Culture Shock.
After a few seconds of the disorienting, swirling, falling feeling that characterizes portkey travel, the couple felt their feet meet solid ground. They stood, leaning into each other for a moment, while they got their footing and caught their breath from the narrow escape back in England.
Snape looked around at his surroundings. He found himself in a small brick walled courtyard. It was just before dawn in New Orleans. The air was much warmer and damper than back home in the Northern part of Great Britain, and it was very still and quiet. He could hear the gentle trickling of water in a little fountain on the other side of the courtyard, and he smelled the earthy smell of dirt and plants from the many large terra cotta pots situated against the courtyard walls.
"Can they follow us through?" Asked Mira.
"No, not without the portkey. The distance is simply too great to try and follow, even if they were skilled enough to be able to ride apparation energy wakes."
"Then we're safe, for now at least."
Mira turned and took in the sight of the courtyard. It had been a long time since she had last been here. The plants were no longer in bloom, and the garden had a slightly decayed air to it, being winter in a warm weather climate. But other than the normal changes brought by time, everything was as she remembered.
She placed a hand on his shoulder. "Come on, let's go inside."
Mira led Snape across the courtyard, fished the keys out of her pocket, and unlocked a plain wood door on the back wall of the large brick building. They stepped into a small hallway that led from the back of the building to the front. It was a private entrance for the shopkeeper and the residents who lived there. She motioned towards a staircase in a small alcove. "I'm on the top floor, this is the only way up or down, besides the fire escape out back."
They climbed the stairs, passing a landing at the second floor that gave access to the door to the second floor apartment. On the third floor landing, there was another simple wooden door with a large wooden number three nailed to it. There was no handle on the door, nor any hinges. Mira pulled her little wand out of her robe pocket and tapped it to the door. A handle and hinges materialized. She used her key to unlock the door. She turned back to Snape.
"Welcome to my home. It's not much, it's not very magical, but it's mine."
She walked through a small entry foyer and switched on a lamp, which revealed a spacious but modestly furnished room. There was a small kitchenette to one side and a small table with four chairs near a pass- through opening. The sitting area had two sections, one consisted of a grouping of comfortable chairs around a small fireplace, opposite that was an entertainment center full of electronics and a pair of sofas situated in front of it with a low table between them. An arched doorway in the back of the sitting room led to a narrow hallway. To the right and left were matching bedroom suites which each consisted of a bedchamber, bathroom, and small study. Each bedchamber had a small step-out balcony. Mira's, to the right, faced out over the courtyard, the spare bedroom faced left, over a somewhat busy street on the edges of the French Quarter in New Orleans.
Snape looked curiously at the muggle electronics and other non-magical objects.
"Come on, there's more!"
Mira led him back through the little hallway, through the sitting area, back out the front door. To the side of the third floor landing, there was a small door that at first glance, appeared to be a broom or coat closet. She used her key and opened it up to reveal a stairway.
Warily, Snape followed her up the narrow steps to the roof of the building. They emerged onto a rooftop garden consisting of two long narrow glass conservatories. The view was spectacular. In the distance were the tall buildings of the modern downtown section of the city, and the sky was a rich shade of blue, punctuated by the orange glow of the sun, as dawn broke over the city.
"The couple who rent the first two floors from me grow herbs and flowers in the greenhouses; magical as well as non-magical. The wife dabbles in potioning. Too bad you won't get a chance to sit down and have a chat with her. She could probably teach you a lot about the native plants of this region."
Snape stood transfixed on the city skyline. He had never seen tall city buildings from this close of a vantage point before. Whenever he flew long distances on broom, he tended to stick to the skies above less populated areas. He felt very uncomfortable around such modern technology, muggle technology.
"Come on, let's get you settled in, I'm sure this is all a bit new and strange to you."
"That is most certainly an understatement" he replied tersely.
Mira took his hand and led him to the stairs and back to her apartment.
"Why don't you have a seat and make yourself comfortable. I'll go and see if there's any tea fit to brew in the kitchen. I may have sugar, but I'm afraid no cream, unless muggle imitation powdered creamer is okay?"
"Black tea is fine, whatever you have is fine."
Snape sat on one of the sofas and looked curiously at the array of muggle electronics stacked on the entertainment center. He thought he recognized something there as a radio, but the rest was completely foreign to him. There was a small flat black plastic object with numbered buttons sitting on the table. He picked it up and was examining it when a strange trilling noise started coming from a strange object on the surface of the kitchen pass through counter. He jumped up from the sofa and whipped out his wand and pointed it at the thing.
Watching from the pass-through, Mira snickered to herself.
"Relax! It's just the telephone. Jules and Maggie downstairs must have realized that I'm here."
Mira and removed the top part of the object and held it to the side of her face and started talking into it.
"Hello? Hi Jules! Yeah, I just got in a few minutes ago. No, I'm afraid I'll only be here for a few days at the most, and then I have to go back to England. I've brought a friend; so don't be alarmed if you see a strange man hanging around with me. What do you mean I only hang around with strange men! Screw you Jules! With the raggedy ass broom you flew into town on! Heh, right. Kiss-kiss yourself. And give Maggie my regards. Tell her I hope to come back for a longer visit soon. Okay, bye now."
Mira hung up the phone and turned to Snape, who had a very confused look on his face.
"It's a telephone. You know, a telephone? Oh, I guess you don't know, do you. Come here, let me show you how it works."
Snape pocketed his wand and approached her warily.
"Okay, see, this part here, the base with the buttons that have numbers on them? You press those buttons to dial a phone number. Every house or business that has a telephone has it's own telephone number assigned to it. You pick up this part, the handset, put it to your ear, and listen for a dial tone."
She handed the handset to him. He put it to his ear and heard a strange humming noise.
"Okay, if you hear that noise, then the line's working properly, and you press the buttons of the phone number that you want to call."
Mira pressed a series of digits on the base of the phone, and motioned for Snape to listen to the earpiece.
He heard three short higher pitched buzzing sounds, then a click. A woman's voice started speaking.
"The weather today is Sunny, with a high of fifty-seven degrees. Some cloudiness this evening, but no chance of precipitation. At the sound of the tone, the time will be six eleven a.m."
There was a beeping noise, then a few clicks, and then the original buzzing sound Snape first heard when he put the phone to his ear.
"Who did we just call?"
"Information. It's not really a person, it's computer generated. But now you know how a telephone works."
He gingerly placed the handset back on the cradle, and looked at Mira with a confused and irritated look on his face.
"Mira, this is all quite fascinating, but I really don't have the time for a crash course in muggle life. What can I do to help you retrieve the artifact so that we can get it back to England?"
"I'm sorry. I understand you're anxious to get this over with, but sit back down, let me bring you your tea. You've come a long way and have seen a lot of strange new things. While you drink your tea, I'll make a telephone call to see if we can get to the artifact tonight."
She stroked his hair and went back to the kitchen and emerged with a small tea tray that held a large mug of steaming tea with the string and tag of a teabag hanging down the side, a spoon, and two glass jars. One jar contained sugar, the other contained powdered imitation creamer. She set it down in front of him on the table.
"I'm sorry I don't have the things to serve a proper pot of tea for you, but I spend very little time here nowadays and this is the best I could come up with. The one jar has sugar in it, the other one; the white powdery stuff is fake creamer. Not as good as cream or milk, but it'll do."
She left him to his tea and went into the bedroom to make the call in private. The desk clerk at the plantation house inn who answered the phone said that there were no rooms available for that evening, but he had one opening up in the morning. She told him that was fine, and gave the necessary information to book a room for the following night. She hung up the phone, went into her bathroom, splashed some cool water onto her face, found a black silk kimono robe in her closet, and changed out of her witches' robe. She emerged from the bedroom refreshed and more suitably attired for a predominately muggle city.
Snape set down his mug of tea and looked at her quizzically. "Mira, what did you change into muggle clothes for?"
"Because once we step out that front door, we enter into a muggle city. Jules and Maggie are wizarding folks, as are many others who live in the French Quarter. But it's not a magical district like Diagon Alley or Hogsmeade. I simply feel more comfortable dressed in muggle clothes when I'm here in New Orleans. I'll sort us both out some street clothes in a little bit. Maybe Jules has something I can borrow for you?"
"When are we leaving to get the artifact?"
"I'm sorry Severus, we can't go get it until tomorrow night. The plantation it's hidden at is being used as a bed and breakfast inn nowadays, and I have to have a legitimate reason to be there to access the room it's hidden in. I can't just apparate in and out, there are muggles all over the place. I tried to reserve a room for tonight, but there were no vacancies. But I have a room booked for tomorrow night. Well arrive under the pretense of being guests, and I can get to the artifact then."
Snape's brows creased in disappointment. At having to spend an entire day there doing nothing productive, and at the thought of having to spend time in even closer proximity to muggles. Mira sensed his apprehension and disappointment and tried to cheer him up.
"Well, we can make the best of it. If you're game, I'll show you around the Quarter. Show you the few strictly magical places in town, as well as some of the other interesting sights. What do you say?"
"I'm really not sure I'm up to going out exploring Mira."
"Oh come on, we can't just sit here until tomorrow afternoon. Please, it'll be fun. I'll make you a deal. Give it an hour, just an hour. And if you're unable to get comfortable with it, we'll come back and just wait until we can go pick up the artifact. What do you say?"
"I don't know."
Mira took his hands and pleaded with mock sincerity. "Oh please! For me? Just give it one hour."
Snape snatched his hands out of hers and crossed his arms over his chest, "Oh alright! Damn, you can be annoying woman! I'll go. But if I say so, we come straight back here. Do I make myself clear?"
"Clear. It's a deal. Calm down, it'll be okay. You need to relax."
"How can I relax in such a strange place?"
Mira reached out and put her hand on his thigh.
"We've got a few hours before the city really wakes up and gets moving. Come on, let's go kill some time, I'll help you relax."
He raised his eyebrow and smirked as she took him by the hand and led him into her bedroom.
Disclaimer: Not mine. Nope. None of it.
Chapter 21: Culture Shock.
After a few seconds of the disorienting, swirling, falling feeling that characterizes portkey travel, the couple felt their feet meet solid ground. They stood, leaning into each other for a moment, while they got their footing and caught their breath from the narrow escape back in England.
Snape looked around at his surroundings. He found himself in a small brick walled courtyard. It was just before dawn in New Orleans. The air was much warmer and damper than back home in the Northern part of Great Britain, and it was very still and quiet. He could hear the gentle trickling of water in a little fountain on the other side of the courtyard, and he smelled the earthy smell of dirt and plants from the many large terra cotta pots situated against the courtyard walls.
"Can they follow us through?" Asked Mira.
"No, not without the portkey. The distance is simply too great to try and follow, even if they were skilled enough to be able to ride apparation energy wakes."
"Then we're safe, for now at least."
Mira turned and took in the sight of the courtyard. It had been a long time since she had last been here. The plants were no longer in bloom, and the garden had a slightly decayed air to it, being winter in a warm weather climate. But other than the normal changes brought by time, everything was as she remembered.
She placed a hand on his shoulder. "Come on, let's go inside."
Mira led Snape across the courtyard, fished the keys out of her pocket, and unlocked a plain wood door on the back wall of the large brick building. They stepped into a small hallway that led from the back of the building to the front. It was a private entrance for the shopkeeper and the residents who lived there. She motioned towards a staircase in a small alcove. "I'm on the top floor, this is the only way up or down, besides the fire escape out back."
They climbed the stairs, passing a landing at the second floor that gave access to the door to the second floor apartment. On the third floor landing, there was another simple wooden door with a large wooden number three nailed to it. There was no handle on the door, nor any hinges. Mira pulled her little wand out of her robe pocket and tapped it to the door. A handle and hinges materialized. She used her key to unlock the door. She turned back to Snape.
"Welcome to my home. It's not much, it's not very magical, but it's mine."
She walked through a small entry foyer and switched on a lamp, which revealed a spacious but modestly furnished room. There was a small kitchenette to one side and a small table with four chairs near a pass- through opening. The sitting area had two sections, one consisted of a grouping of comfortable chairs around a small fireplace, opposite that was an entertainment center full of electronics and a pair of sofas situated in front of it with a low table between them. An arched doorway in the back of the sitting room led to a narrow hallway. To the right and left were matching bedroom suites which each consisted of a bedchamber, bathroom, and small study. Each bedchamber had a small step-out balcony. Mira's, to the right, faced out over the courtyard, the spare bedroom faced left, over a somewhat busy street on the edges of the French Quarter in New Orleans.
Snape looked curiously at the muggle electronics and other non-magical objects.
"Come on, there's more!"
Mira led him back through the little hallway, through the sitting area, back out the front door. To the side of the third floor landing, there was a small door that at first glance, appeared to be a broom or coat closet. She used her key and opened it up to reveal a stairway.
Warily, Snape followed her up the narrow steps to the roof of the building. They emerged onto a rooftop garden consisting of two long narrow glass conservatories. The view was spectacular. In the distance were the tall buildings of the modern downtown section of the city, and the sky was a rich shade of blue, punctuated by the orange glow of the sun, as dawn broke over the city.
"The couple who rent the first two floors from me grow herbs and flowers in the greenhouses; magical as well as non-magical. The wife dabbles in potioning. Too bad you won't get a chance to sit down and have a chat with her. She could probably teach you a lot about the native plants of this region."
Snape stood transfixed on the city skyline. He had never seen tall city buildings from this close of a vantage point before. Whenever he flew long distances on broom, he tended to stick to the skies above less populated areas. He felt very uncomfortable around such modern technology, muggle technology.
"Come on, let's get you settled in, I'm sure this is all a bit new and strange to you."
"That is most certainly an understatement" he replied tersely.
Mira took his hand and led him to the stairs and back to her apartment.
"Why don't you have a seat and make yourself comfortable. I'll go and see if there's any tea fit to brew in the kitchen. I may have sugar, but I'm afraid no cream, unless muggle imitation powdered creamer is okay?"
"Black tea is fine, whatever you have is fine."
Snape sat on one of the sofas and looked curiously at the array of muggle electronics stacked on the entertainment center. He thought he recognized something there as a radio, but the rest was completely foreign to him. There was a small flat black plastic object with numbered buttons sitting on the table. He picked it up and was examining it when a strange trilling noise started coming from a strange object on the surface of the kitchen pass through counter. He jumped up from the sofa and whipped out his wand and pointed it at the thing.
Watching from the pass-through, Mira snickered to herself.
"Relax! It's just the telephone. Jules and Maggie downstairs must have realized that I'm here."
Mira and removed the top part of the object and held it to the side of her face and started talking into it.
"Hello? Hi Jules! Yeah, I just got in a few minutes ago. No, I'm afraid I'll only be here for a few days at the most, and then I have to go back to England. I've brought a friend; so don't be alarmed if you see a strange man hanging around with me. What do you mean I only hang around with strange men! Screw you Jules! With the raggedy ass broom you flew into town on! Heh, right. Kiss-kiss yourself. And give Maggie my regards. Tell her I hope to come back for a longer visit soon. Okay, bye now."
Mira hung up the phone and turned to Snape, who had a very confused look on his face.
"It's a telephone. You know, a telephone? Oh, I guess you don't know, do you. Come here, let me show you how it works."
Snape pocketed his wand and approached her warily.
"Okay, see, this part here, the base with the buttons that have numbers on them? You press those buttons to dial a phone number. Every house or business that has a telephone has it's own telephone number assigned to it. You pick up this part, the handset, put it to your ear, and listen for a dial tone."
She handed the handset to him. He put it to his ear and heard a strange humming noise.
"Okay, if you hear that noise, then the line's working properly, and you press the buttons of the phone number that you want to call."
Mira pressed a series of digits on the base of the phone, and motioned for Snape to listen to the earpiece.
He heard three short higher pitched buzzing sounds, then a click. A woman's voice started speaking.
"The weather today is Sunny, with a high of fifty-seven degrees. Some cloudiness this evening, but no chance of precipitation. At the sound of the tone, the time will be six eleven a.m."
There was a beeping noise, then a few clicks, and then the original buzzing sound Snape first heard when he put the phone to his ear.
"Who did we just call?"
"Information. It's not really a person, it's computer generated. But now you know how a telephone works."
He gingerly placed the handset back on the cradle, and looked at Mira with a confused and irritated look on his face.
"Mira, this is all quite fascinating, but I really don't have the time for a crash course in muggle life. What can I do to help you retrieve the artifact so that we can get it back to England?"
"I'm sorry. I understand you're anxious to get this over with, but sit back down, let me bring you your tea. You've come a long way and have seen a lot of strange new things. While you drink your tea, I'll make a telephone call to see if we can get to the artifact tonight."
She stroked his hair and went back to the kitchen and emerged with a small tea tray that held a large mug of steaming tea with the string and tag of a teabag hanging down the side, a spoon, and two glass jars. One jar contained sugar, the other contained powdered imitation creamer. She set it down in front of him on the table.
"I'm sorry I don't have the things to serve a proper pot of tea for you, but I spend very little time here nowadays and this is the best I could come up with. The one jar has sugar in it, the other one; the white powdery stuff is fake creamer. Not as good as cream or milk, but it'll do."
She left him to his tea and went into the bedroom to make the call in private. The desk clerk at the plantation house inn who answered the phone said that there were no rooms available for that evening, but he had one opening up in the morning. She told him that was fine, and gave the necessary information to book a room for the following night. She hung up the phone, went into her bathroom, splashed some cool water onto her face, found a black silk kimono robe in her closet, and changed out of her witches' robe. She emerged from the bedroom refreshed and more suitably attired for a predominately muggle city.
Snape set down his mug of tea and looked at her quizzically. "Mira, what did you change into muggle clothes for?"
"Because once we step out that front door, we enter into a muggle city. Jules and Maggie are wizarding folks, as are many others who live in the French Quarter. But it's not a magical district like Diagon Alley or Hogsmeade. I simply feel more comfortable dressed in muggle clothes when I'm here in New Orleans. I'll sort us both out some street clothes in a little bit. Maybe Jules has something I can borrow for you?"
"When are we leaving to get the artifact?"
"I'm sorry Severus, we can't go get it until tomorrow night. The plantation it's hidden at is being used as a bed and breakfast inn nowadays, and I have to have a legitimate reason to be there to access the room it's hidden in. I can't just apparate in and out, there are muggles all over the place. I tried to reserve a room for tonight, but there were no vacancies. But I have a room booked for tomorrow night. Well arrive under the pretense of being guests, and I can get to the artifact then."
Snape's brows creased in disappointment. At having to spend an entire day there doing nothing productive, and at the thought of having to spend time in even closer proximity to muggles. Mira sensed his apprehension and disappointment and tried to cheer him up.
"Well, we can make the best of it. If you're game, I'll show you around the Quarter. Show you the few strictly magical places in town, as well as some of the other interesting sights. What do you say?"
"I'm really not sure I'm up to going out exploring Mira."
"Oh come on, we can't just sit here until tomorrow afternoon. Please, it'll be fun. I'll make you a deal. Give it an hour, just an hour. And if you're unable to get comfortable with it, we'll come back and just wait until we can go pick up the artifact. What do you say?"
"I don't know."
Mira took his hands and pleaded with mock sincerity. "Oh please! For me? Just give it one hour."
Snape snatched his hands out of hers and crossed his arms over his chest, "Oh alright! Damn, you can be annoying woman! I'll go. But if I say so, we come straight back here. Do I make myself clear?"
"Clear. It's a deal. Calm down, it'll be okay. You need to relax."
"How can I relax in such a strange place?"
Mira reached out and put her hand on his thigh.
"We've got a few hours before the city really wakes up and gets moving. Come on, let's go kill some time, I'll help you relax."
He raised his eyebrow and smirked as she took him by the hand and led him into her bedroom.