Naruto stared at the ceiling of his bedroom gloomily, flopping on his side and burying his head into his pillow. He had been staying in bed all day just to pass the time. The idea of getting up repulsed him, he just couldn't bring himself to do it. It felt like his stomach was a great, empty hole. Not even the thought of ramen could cheer him up.
Getting up, would mean going to train-which was the only thing to do at a time like this-which eventually led up to facing him. He winced at the mere thought. It was pathetic, really. When did things become like this? When did the very picture of him lying by his bedside so disgust him that he had to throw it under his bed? As if hiding the photo would make him go away?
He was living a lie. They both were. What had once begun so beautifully, with both of them full of hope and ready to take any challenge ahead of them, was now hollow and wasted. It made Naruto sick that things had turned out like this. He had been so happy, filled to the brim with undeniable joy, and Sasuke-Sasuke had smiled! An honest, true smile, and Naruto felt like he would burst every time he looked at him. It seemed as if this overwhelming feeling would never leave. Like the two of them would never quit smiling. Maybe if he wished hard enough, it would.
But things changed. Somehow, someway or another, the flame between them dulled and withered away. And the two of them kept bickering and arguing all the time, but it wasn't like it had been before. This time they weren't lightly teasing, they weren't expressing concern in a discreet way, they were unleashing their frustration and disappointment the only way they new how.
Why couldn't they just be honest to each other? When had they become dishonest? When did this lie start? Naruto, much as it pained him to realize it, knew that this façade was killing him. He felt rotten and dirty. Lying to all his friends was bad enough, but to himself? It was too much. Too much! But he, in the deep recesses in his mind, knew the hard truth. What they had, it was gone, and it wasn't coming back.
Naruto clutched his side, squeezing painfully as he felt his face distort and a salty taste reach his lips. God, it hurt, when would this agony subside? It was his own damn fault, for ever even imagining about being in love.
It was too much to reach for. He had been happy before, when they were just rivals, comrades when it really mattered, friends only on the brink of death. But lovers? Lovers!? It was the stupidest thing they had ever gone. The biggest mistake of his life. True friendship didn't mean turning out that way.
It was their weakness. The loneliness. No one wanted to be lonely, and Naruto had thought it would go away when he found his team, his friends, but as he matured, a new longing arose in him. It tore at his insides, and try as he could, it welled up every time he glanced at his friend when the other wasn't looking, It made him choke, made him wish he would just explode already, the need surging as his blood pumped and his palms grew moist. It was both exhilarating and terrifying, making him want to die in silence at one moment, and the next throw himself at Sasuke. It was shocking, feeling this way, so confused and vulnerable. He didn't know this would ever happen to him.
He never dreamed anything would happen between them, or in actuality, all he did was dream. But it was nothing but fantasy, silly school-boys' romance, he told himself. In time it would go away, but it didn't , at least not soon enough.
Because, one day, Sasuke approached him. Seemingly out of the blue, and they just thrust themselves into a fight. Though it as passionate as their usual battles, it was wholly different. The next thing Naruto knew, he woke up to the glaring sun and a smiling Sasuke. The opposite of what he was used to, excluding that Sasuke was never in his bed.
From their onward they were closer than ever before. In a casual, disclosed sort of way. Their behavior didn't alter totally, it just became much warmer and they were more content and relaxed than they had been in what seemed like years.
It just felt right. Perfect. In their foolish , youthful minds, it felt similar to destiny. Sure, they had dealt with many unexpected problems and mountains of conflicts, odd and awkward situations that made them nauseous, issues over their awful pasts, yet they overcame it. That had to be something, what they had was simply amazing.
Too soon did it all melt away. Now, it was just too late. Naruto couldn't pretend anymore, he couldn't fake what he was feeling. It was too late. It had gone, passed away like the fleeing wind.
Naruto stopped shaking at wiped his face with his blanket, clutching it and draping it across himself tightly. He looked around the messy room, which he had stumbled into the previous night after a particularly tiring mission, grateful that Sasuke didn't even ask to stay over. He had gone straight to bed, and had now been lying in it for well over twelve hours.
Looking over at the window, he could see the sun shining through the window's blinds. It looked fresh and merry, golden and withstanding. Naruto could see that it was obviously going to be a beautiful day. Somehow this empowered him. With newly invoked vigor, he pushed back the covers and stood up. Eyes shining with determination, he felt a sense of invincibility. The day was too gorgeous to ignore.
He was suddenly grateful for all he'd had with Sasuke. It had shown him how beautiful a deep, true love could be. The regret had passed, and he felt more refreshed and like his old self.
Today would be the day, no more lying. He'd free himself.
End
A/N: God that was corny…sigh Sorry, I haven't written in eons, and this was the result of listening to "It's Too Late Baby" numerous times, sung by Carol King. That song is beautiful, and it inspired this. I'm sorry Naruto was so OOC, but it fit the situation in my mind. I was just thinking of how painful it is when one realizes that you've fallen out of love. I'm pretty sure it hurts like hell, so I made Naruto much more mature and understanding. sighs again Please offer constructive criticism, ne? I could really use some good advice to better my writing skills.