Disclaimer: I SWEAR I don't own Harry Potter. Really. Ask J. K. Rowling. Or anyone at this site, really.

A/N: im getting better at updates.. although after this chapter is posted, I gotta start on chp 2 of my other fic, rantings and ravings. This is tha last chapter of this story! If ya want more l/j tho plz read my rantings and ravings story.

I hadn't slept at all since I had crept back to my dormitory at one o'clock.

I had gotten my scrapbook, filled with pictures from first year to now, and laid on my bed looking at it. A good bit from fifth year and up were quick snapshots of Lily. I traced the outline of Lily's photograph face, sighing, while the picture of her smiled shyly at me.

Opening the curtains hanging from the sides of my bed, I swung my legs over the edge and put the book up. I couldn't sleep, and decided to walk down to the kitchens, even though it was four in the morning. I got my Invisibility Cloak and the Marauder's Map, quietly sneaking out of the room where my three friends slept.

I fell out of my light sleep and out of my chair when I heard the portrait shut at four, early the next morning. I climbed back into the chair and tried to go back to sleep.

It was only 4:05 in the morning. I knew we weren't supposed to be out of bed, but, as Head Girl, I could make up some excuse. I decided to go down to the kitchens.

Five minutes later, thanks to all the wonderful secret passages the founders of the school had created, I found myself sitting down at a table in the kitchens, being served by a dozen house elves. They knew me by now, seeing as Sirius, Remus, Peter, and me found the kitchens the first month of school in first year.

I got a cup of coffee and sat, stirring the cup, in silence. My thoughts returned to who else but Lily. I had to win her over, for the sake of my sanity. I just sat there, brooding, until the fruit bowl portrait swung forwards on the other side of the kitchen.

While walking down from the Common Room, I wondered who had left there, waking me up.

James hadn't been sneaking out lately, as far as I knew.

It was probably Sirius, of to song some girl in the Astronomy Tower or his new favorite broom closet on the sixth floor. Hey, as Head Girl, I knew quite a bit about my fellow students.

Then I thought about James again. I stopped walking, and leaned against the corridor wall.

What was I going to do with him?

The nutcase, obsessing over me until I loved him like crazy, and then ignoring me.

I sank to the cold, stone floor.

How much longer would he torture me? And then, would he say he gave up on me? Or that… he never even cared?

I began to panic.

What if he didn't ever like me? And he fell in love with some other girl, but I still loved him?

I jumped up.

I would live out the rest of my days alone, maybe watching him with some other girl, still pining over him?

I started running.

I ran furiously 'til I couldn't take it anymore and then only slowed to a jog. I just wanted to get to the kitchens, get a damn good amount of ice cream, and go to sleep.

I picked up my pace, trying to keep my mind off James.

A minute later I reached the corridor outside of the kitchens and walked in through the opening behind the fruit bowl painting.

It was Lily. What the hell was she doing in the kitchens at 4:25 AM?

She looked up, her face red, and her eyes widened as she saw me.

"Oh… er… sorry. Didn't think anyone would be in here," she said. "I'll just go." Lily turned back around, intending to leave the room.

"It's okay," I told her quickly. "I don't mind."

"Um… okay." Lily hesitantly sat across from me at the little table.

"Why are you here?" I blurted out.

"Well… I couldn't sleep and just to… think about things." Lily gave a sheepish grin.

"Oh, I can leave if you wanna be alone…" She hates me. I shouldn't be bothering her right then. But I didn't want to leave her. It's the one time I've talked to her all year.

"No. I can't just kick you out of the kitchens and I… wouldn't mind company, really." Lily smiled shyly at me.

"Er, okay, then." She really didn't mind talking to me? Maybe, eventually, she would become my friend, or even go out with me. I grinned. "D'you want something to eat?"

"Well, I've had a craving for some ice cream." She grinned back at me, and a house-elf came up to her.

"Miss would like ice cream?" the creature squeaked. "What kind, miss?"

"How about mint chocolate chip?" I told the house-elf, smiling. I couldn't believe I was sitting in the kitchens with James, at four-something in the morning.

Soon as the words came out of my mouth, a few house-elves came running with quite a large bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream. I laughed, thanking them, and started to eat.

"What about you? Why are you down here?" I curiously asked James.

"Couldn't sleep either. And, yeah, I s'pose I needed to think."

"Oh." I continued eating.

"What do you want to do after school?" James suddenly asked me.

"Well… I had thought about being an auror. With Voldemort and everything out there. What about you?"

"Same. My parents are aurors."

"My parents are muggles," I laughed.

James smiled at me.

We talked for almost two hours. I had never seen that side of James Potter before, and really I loved him even more for it.

We talked about our future, classes, quidditch, our friends, families, pasts, our memories, favorite foods and such, and basically anything we could think of.

During that time, I felt like James and I had been old friends for years, even though I didn't want to be just friends. But anything was better than him ignoring me.

"So, you've never had a serious boyfriend?" James asked me.

"No. Don't pretend you've ever had a serious girlfriend; all the girls you've dated have lasted three weeks tops," I teased him. Even if I dated him, would I be like one of those girls?

"Well…" he smiled, "I've never really liked any of those girls."

"Really? Then why'd you date them?" I asked him. I really wanted to know.

"Er, well. All the girls I've ever dated are just… I don't know. I guess I was just trying to take my mind off things."

"Things?"

James grew serious.

"There's always been one girl that just wouldn't date me. I know I was rude, and arrogant, and self-centered, but this year I've tried my hardest to change, just for her. Because I love her. But she doesn't know that. She thinks it's just a foolish crush, but it's not." I can't believe I'm admitting my deepest feelings about Lily Evans to her. I wonder if she'll know it's her. By the stunned look on her face, I think she had guessed the girl was her.

"Who?" she asked hoarsely.

Oh. My. God. Is he talking about me? What the bloody hell? I thought he hated me now or something. Yet what if he wasn't talking about me?

I knew my face looked shocked. I was. My mind was racing. I had to ask him, to make sure it was me.

"Who?" My voice startled me. It sounded so unlike me.

I looked in James's beautiful hazel eyes and my breath caught in my throat.

His eyes were full of something I had never seen, or noticed, before. Maybe it was love. Was it love? What was he doing?

He was leaning closer to me across the table. I couldn't move. I had no idea what he was doing.

His lips met mine in a soft, sweet, pure kiss, just like my first kiss all over again. He wrapped his arms around me and my hands encircled his neck.

I was kissing Lily Evans. I was kissing Lily! I slipped my arms around her waist, bringing her closer to me.

I don't know how long we just held each other, just giving tender kisses. It was heaven.

Inevitably we broke apart. Sometime during our kiss, I had pulled Lily on to my lap.

She leaned her head against my chest and I fingered her hair.

That kiss was… absolutely perfect. It was… so different than all the other kisses I've ever had from other guys. I knew it was because I loved James.

"James," I whispered to him. "I love you."

He held me closer.

"I love you too."

I sighed happily and leaned in for another kiss.

A/N: okay if that last fluffy junk was bad, dunt kill me ive never written fluff before lol. so, that was tha last chp. But im gonna b writin a lot more stuff for other stories. Ive got a ton of ideas just beggin to b written. ;)

Response to Reviewers:

kitty-katty-blu: ok well hopefully all tha criticism would be constructive. ;) wut were u gonna use The Reason for?

buggaboo1: lol thanks! Well this chp didn't have song and I hope it was enuff words fer u. like 1500 or sumthin.. not as long as I wanted, but still I couldn't really think of much else and I wanted it to end there. Yeah snape/hermione is just.. near impossible lol but still u wrote it good.

fire-icecat: thank u! my writing style is my favorite! lol.

hpandfriendsruletheworld: thank ya! hope u like this chp as much as the others. ur review made me write faster! :D

A/N: well there ya go! Im glad every1 liked this n hope y'all read my other stuff. Luv y'all! Oh yeah, and I just got simple plan: still not getting any… and yellowcard: ocean avenue. They rule!!

::mello::