Disclaimer: They're not really mine….ok, so they're not mine at all, but a girl can dream right?

Rating: PG-13 for language and violence

Timeframe: Post AJBAC

A/N: Ok, yes, beat me over the head with some huge blunt object, for I have been neglecting my authorly dues. I am so sorry fans of mine (few though you are). I'm back at school. So I go to class all day, then in the evenings I have work, then after that I have homework until about 1-2am when I pour myself into bed only to get up and do it all over again. But all of this has taught me that time-management is not just some random subject that teachers and parents bring up to bore you to death and make you look stupid. It is that very thing which has enabled me to continue with this story. I will never ever leave a fic unfinished. I completely understand how it can happen, but have a great intolerance for submerging myself in a story only to find it drops off at a crucial point. I have decided that I will devote at least half an hour every single day to working on my fics. Speaking of which, I have started a new story, which has also been taking up my time. I already have three chapters written, and I'm hoping to get it up on the net this week sometime. Anyway, enough of my senseless rambling. Onward with the story.

Chapter 8

Enlighten Me

Logan's eyes widened in surprise. "Max…it-it's me. Logan, remember?"

Max…is that my name? Max cocked her head to the side, and stared at him intently. "No, I'm sorry, I don't. I mean, you look familiar…like I've seen you before and I know I should remember, but I don't know where."

Logan sighed, and closed his eyes. "Do you remember anything?" he asked.

Max knitted her brow in thought. "I don't know," she replied, shaking her head. "It's not so much thoughts and images…but feelings…" she trailed off. "Everything in my head is a jumbled mess. I just-I can't think right now."

Logan nodded, still not fully understanding what was happening. Well, of course. Fate doesn't come without a cruel sense of irony. That would just make life dull…"Ok, you stay here and rest, I'm gonna go call my doctor."

Max settled back down into the mattress, and rested her head on the pillow, closing her eyes. Logan pulled the sheets up over her, and brushed a lock of hair out of her face. She winced slightly at the touch, and Logan reprimanded himself a second time for having been so inconsiderate.

Quietly, he stole out of the room, and retrieved his phone from it's holder on the table in his living room. Sam was listed under speed dial 4, and after three rings, he groggily spoke into the phone.

"Hello?"

"Sam? It's Logan."

"Why does this feel like déjà vu?" Sam remarked.

Logan almost wanted to smile, but then he remembered the reason for his call. "Listen, Max woke up."

"That's great!" Sam's elated voice carried over the receiver. "How is she?"

Logan took a deep shaky breath before admitting what he had wanted to deny for the past five minutes. "She can't remember anything."

Sam Carr waved his finger back and forth before the deep chocolate brown eyes before him. They followed steadily, and he took notes on his chart. Logan stood in the background watching anxiously.

Max also watched the doctor cautiously. She felt a slight buzz in her head, and seconds later, a flash before her eyes.

flashback

Men in long white coats stood over her. A bright, blinding white light shone in her eyes. They were poking her; touching her with instruments she never knew existed. Why were they doing this to her? She just wanted to get away…

Then they were standing over him. The young boy, whose still lifeless body was displayed on the cold metal table before them…they were standing over him; they were hurting him…

It's okay, he can't feel it, Max's inner voice reminded her as she looked on helplessly. He can't feel anything ever again…

flashback ends

Max shivered noticeably, and Logan rushed to her side. "Are you okay, Max?"

"Yeah," she answered slowly, looking him in the eye. "Just something about doctors makes me uneasy." She turned to Sam with a quick "no offense".

"None taken," he replied with a small smile.

Logan looked at her carefully. "Yeah, you've never liked doctors Max. You refuse to go to one, and you won't even go to a hospital unless you or someone you know is near death," he joked, though that had happened before, more than once.

Max regarded him rather curiously. "Why?"

He pondered whether or not it was safe to tell her the truth, and decided to take the easy way out. For now. "Childhood fear," he responded vaguely, to which Max accepted at face value.

Finally Sam stood, and motioned for Logan to follow him out into the hallway, which he did.

"So what's the verdict?" the journalist asked almost fearfully.

"Well, it looks as though most of her wounds have healed. Some of her bruises are still a little tender, and she'll have to keep the splint on, probably for another couple of days, but it seems like she's at least gotten most of the feeling back in her fingers. I'm gonna give you some morphine to give her in case she complains of pain…"

Logan eyed him expectantly. "What about the whole memory thing?"

Sam sighed heavily. "Max…has amnesia," he said slowly.

Logan thought his heart would sink through the floor. "Why?" he asked, almost like a fearful child. "She remembered me in the car…"

"I don't know why Logan," the doctor answered him. "It could be from PTSD—"

"PTSD?" Logan cut him off before he even had the chance to explain.

"Yeah, post traumatic stress disorder. It can sometimes cause delayed amnesia. When a person has gone through a particularly traumatic ordeal, such as Max has, sometimes the mind shuts it out so that the body can continue to function physically. You know, like repressed memories. Only whatever she's gone through…was distressing enough that she's lost all of her memories."

He nodded thoughtfully. "When will she remember?"

"I don't know that either. Every person is different, and the brain is very complex. A lot of what we understand of brain illnesses like this is just speculation. Sometimes, the patient will remember within a few hours. Most of the time, within a week or so. But I won't lie to you Logan; there have been cases where the patient never gets their memory back." The look on Logan's face caused him to quickly add, "I'm not saying that's what's going to happen to Max. I might be completely wrong about this PTSD diagnosis. The amnesia could've been caused because she hit her head on something; it could've been a reaction to the cocktail I gave her. I don't know what she was given before you brought her here. There might've been some sort of chemical reaction between the two drugs, I don't know. It could've been anything. She's a strong girl, and I have every confidence that she'll make a full recovery. But I want you to be prepared in case she doesn't."

Logan swallowed hard. "Is there anything I can do to help her?"

Sam nodded. "The best thing you can do for her is to be there for her. Surround her with people she knows, but don't overwhelm her. Show her things. Things that you think may have been significant to her; sometimes that can jar a memory. But don't press it; if it doesn't pull anything, it's not going to; and you getting frustrated isn't going to help either of you. Talk to her; tell her about experiences you guys have shared. Memories that you have together. I know you have them," he added with a glint in his eyes.

Logan couldn't help the slight flush of color that hinted at his cheeks. "Anything else?"

Sam shook his head. "Not that I can think of at the moment. Try to keep her comfortable. I'll come back and check-in in a few days."

The two men shook hands, and after Logan thanked him profusely, Sam left. Logan turned towards the closed bedroom door, and approached it slowly.

"I just got you back, Max," he whispered softly. "There's no way in hell I'm letting you get away again." He placed his hand on the handle, and turned slowly. Here goes everything…

Renfro stood silently in front of the committee. It wasn't her fault that 452 had escaped. It was that bastard Deck…if she made it out of this, she was going to skin him alive. How dare he turn his back on Manticore?? Wasn't he the one who incessantly went on and on about the blood, sweat and tears he put into the program to make it the way it was. Well whatever, if he loved his project so much, she'd be damned if she'd stand back and take the fall for whatever problems arose. Of course, that would mean that she wouldn't be standing in front of the committee right now, being chewed out for his actions.

"So let me get this straight," the older gentleman stated as he paced in front of the director. "You don't have Eyes Only. You don't have 452, and you have no idea where Donald Lydecker is?"

"Not a clue, sir," Renfro answered truthfully. She hated being caught under the scrutinizing gaze of the committee. It made her feel open and vulnerable. She had of course been in this position before, but for nothing as big as this. Apparently, the committee was counting on her to get the information about Eyes Only out of 452. She had unwisely placed the burden on Lydecker's shoulders; believing that his extensive connection, training and knowledge of the X5s would give him an advantage where information gathering was concerned. Evidently, she'd been wrong. He had spent hours upon hours everyday with that girl for nearly the past two months, and got nothing. His failure had been her failure, and that was all the committee saw.

"Of course you don't," Pyre responded. He had a habit of pacing in front of his 'victims', as he liked to call them. It made them somewhat nervous and got the message across. This was only the third time Renfro had been said victim, and he almost wanted to be lenient. He knew of her work with the Manticore project. She had only been placed on it a few months ago, and he could already see promising results. But he knew the rest of the committee seated behind him wouldn't approve of his clemency. Finally, he stopped pacing and stood in front of the shorter woman. This had gone on long enough, and he was now late for a round of golf with the mayor. Either she got it, or she didn't. "The committee recognizes you for your thorough work on the Manticore project, and is pleased with your latest results. However, I'm sure you understand the urgency we have for the discovery of Eyes Only. If he reveals the location of the Gilette facility, billions of dollars of US government research and development will go straight down the porcelain septic tank. 452 has that information, and she is now out roaming the streets with it. Find her. Get the identity of Eyes Only, and bring Donald Lydecker to me." He paused. "If you don't, not only will you lose your status and placement with the Manticore project, but we will personally make sure you never work for this government again. Is that understood?"

Renfro took her punishment without emotion as she was taught, and gave a curt nod. "Yes sir," she replied.

"You have three days. Dismissed." Pyre turned and found his seat at the table of the committee, who all nodded to him in approval.

Renfro turned and left without saying another word. The door closed with a soft click behind her, and she strolled down the hall with only one thought on her mind. I'll do more than bring Deck to the committee. I'll slice his head off myself, and serve it to them on a silver platter. A grim smile crossed her lips as the doors of the elevator closed in her face. The colonel had just earned himself a spot at the top of her hit list…right below 452.

The door slowly creaked open, as Logan peered around it. He found Max resting peacefully. In a quick decision, he chose not to awake her, but instead headed toward the kitchen to make some breakfast.

As he stood over the stove, preparing the meal for her, his mind wandered to all the scenarios that had crossed his mind back when he didn't even know Max was alive. Back then, he had only suspected, and in his dreams, they had run to each other, and embraced, expressing long known secrets of love, and promising never to let each other go. Never did it cross his mind that Max might not remember him.

The smell of cinnamon wafted through the house, and Logan hoped it wouldn't draw Max to the kitchen. He wanted it to be a surprise. Quickly, he finished, and arranged everything on a tray. Slowly, he made his way back towards the room, and once again opened the door to find Max asleep. Gradually, he approached her bedside.

"Max," he whispered softly. "Are you awake?"

Max's eyes opened, and she looked up at him. "Oh, hey. What's goin on?"

Logan smiled. "I made you breakfast."

"You did?" Max smiled back. She wasn't sure why, but this was significant to her. Sitting up, she eyed the tray carefully as Logan placed it on her lap. The smile fell from her face as she realized what lay before her. Then she looked up at Logan, and spoke in a whisper. "You made me cinnamon buns…they're my favorite."

Logan knelt at her side, hoping not to look too hopeful. "You remember?"

Max looked away, and her eyes showed that her mind was actually very far away. "I remember the first time you made them for me. It was after…" she stopped. "After…I don't know. I can't remember," she sighed, hoping Logan wouldn't be able to read the frustration in her voice.

"It's okay, Max," his voice was no more than a murmur, but Max took every word to heart. "It's good that you remembered that. It means that you're still you inside, you're just lost. But I won't stop trying to help you until you're happy again."

Max smiled a little. "Thanks, it means a lot that you care."

Logan started to answer her, but the phone rang just then. He excused himself, and decided to take it in the living room, just in case Max could overhear.

"Hello?"

"What's up, Richie Rich?" came the familiar voice over the receiver.

"Oh, hey Cindy," he sighed. He was tired of explaining to her the lack of funds that his name now entailed.

"How's my boo?" she asked.

"Well, there's good news, and there's not-so-good news. Which one do you want first?"

"Gimme the good news, Original Cindy needs a little somethin-somethin to brighten up her day. Keep in mind she works for Normal." At which of course, Normal's voice could be heard yelling 'Bip bip bip' in the background.

"Ok," Logan laughed. "The good news is she woke up."

"She did?!" Cindy could barely contain herself. "I'm on my way over right now."

"NO!" he quickly objected. "Wait until after work. I think she might need her job back, and if you lose yours, whose gonna convince Normal to take her back?"

She was quiet for a moment, thinking it over. "Aight," she finally answered, "but the minute I'm out of this hellhole, I'm headin over that way."

"Ok," Logan sighed, glad that she had fell for the bait. There was no way in hell he was letting Max go near Jam Pony again. Manticore probably already had the place on lockdown. But he felt as though he needed a little more time with Max before he let her see anyone else. Keeping in mind Sam's warning about overwhelming her, Logan was grateful that Max had remembered her favorite breakfast. He had hoped it would draw something out, but didn't want to seem disappointed if it didn't. If she didn't remember anything else, at least she recognized that he cared about her, and that was enough for now.

It was a minute before he realized that the other end of the line had went dead, and hung the phone up. Only then did he remember that he never got around to telling Max's best friend that she probably wouldn't remember her when she saw her, but he decided to worry about that later. He heard a small noise, and looked up to see Max standing a few feet away with the empty tray in her hands.

"Max! You scared the crap out of me. Why do you always sneak up on me?" came out of his mouth before he could stop himself.

"I do?" Max inquired.

"Sorry, I'm a little on edge. Didn't get much sleep last night." Max stared at him blankly for a minute, and Logan tried to ignore his body's natural response to seeing the woman of his dreams dressed in his own t-shirt and boxers. "Ok, if you want to get a shower or whatever, you have clothes in the bottom two dressers of my bureau, and the bathroom's right there, so knock yourself out."

"What are you gonna do?"

"I'm gonna go do some work at my laptop in the computer room. I'm a little behind, so playing catch-up is a definite must." He smiled. "All the widows, orphans and small animals will be waiting for me."

Max cocked her head to the side, one hand on her hip, and Logan smiled inwardly at the familiar stance. "What is it exactly that you do?"

A moment of hesitation ensued, and Logan looked toward the window. He wasn't sure if he wanted to tell her about Eyes Only just yet. He thought maybe that should be something that she should remember on her own. It wasn't that he didn't trust her, but she might not really understand if he just divulged it to her. Not to mention the fact that knowing only put her in further danger.

"Oh, a little of this, a little of that. You know, fight the power, protect the downtrodden—"

"Blah, blah, woof, woof?" Max blurted without thinking. For the second time that morning, Max felt a strange buzzing in her head.

flashback

Max and Logan had just finished a game of chess, and sat chatting idly in his apartment. Max invited Logan to Crash to watch her in a stunt contest, but he declined.

"Oh, I forgot. No fun for Logan Cale," Max spat out sarcastically as she pulled on her coat. "Fight the power; protect the downtrodden, blah blah, woof woof." Then threw a 'see ya' over her shoulder as she breezed out the door.

They sat together in his car. Max's heart was heavy in her chest. She didn't want to leave, how could she? How could she walk away and leave Logan carrying a burden that wasn't even his?

"You could always ditch it all and go on the lam with me. Great way to visit exotic places; meet new people," she suggested. But once again, he declined.

"I'd just slow you down." His face held a small smile, but his voice was deeply saddened as well.

"It's okay," Max assured him, knowing that she would do whatever it took to make sure he stayed safe. Apparently he knew that as well.

"I have to go back. Someone has to watch out for the downtrodden. Blah, blah, woof, woof, right?" Logan looked into her eyes, and at once, Max was almost at a loss for words.

"Right," she whispered.

flashback ends

Logan took a step forward. "Max?" he questioned. She remembered! She remembered something, I know she did… But Max slowly came back to reality, and began to step away from him. Much to Logan's great surprise, her eyes brimmed with unshed tears.

"I didn't want to leave you Logan," she said, her voice barely loud enough for Logan to make out what she was saying. "Why couldn't you just come with me? Didn't you know I wanted you to?"

Logan froze in place. Of course, she remembered running with Zack… "Max…I wanted to. I swear to you I did…but…the way I was back then…" Logan trailed off. If there was anything that he hoped Max wouldn't remember, it was his downward spiral of self-pity and despair that hit once he ended up in the chair. "I couldn't go with you. In the end, it would've gotten the both of us killed."

"I could've protected you. Why couldn't you just trust me?"

Her words hurt Logan more than she would ever know. And he was rendered speechless. Didn't she know that Logan trusted her with his life? He had proven so on more than one occasion. It would've helped if she'd remember that.

Max turned on her heel, and retreated into his bedroom, closing the door softly behind her. Logan wanted to follow her, but decided against it. Memories died harder than instincts, and Logan knew what Max tended to be like when people she either didn't know or didn't like tried to touch her. There would be other times he could comfort her, but for now, maybe she just needed to be alone. He wasn't sure what he would say anyway. How was he supposed to explain to her that his being in a wheelchair was more important than being with her? That wasn't necessarily how he felt, but at the time, it was very near the top of his priority list.

Logan sighed and ran a tired hand through his hair. He wouldn't give up one second of what he'd had with Max for the world, but reliving everything over again wasn't something that he was essentially looking forward to.

Post: I just want to say thank you thank you and thank you again to all of my reviewers. You guys are what keep me going, and I'm sorry I haven't been as faithful to you as you have been to me :-( Next chapter by next week…I hope.