The cab screeched to a stop, and Luka once again regretted having wrecked his car. Not that he was sure he'd trust Abby to drive it, of course ....
"Need help inside?" asked the cabbie.
"Nope. We're fine," Luka said. He handed the cabbie the fare and opened the car door. A deep breath and he stepped out, then waited for Abby to follow. She offered him a hand and he shook his head a little. "I can manage," he said softly. While it was no secret to the cabbie that he was not in the best of shape; he had, after all, picked them up at the hospital, Luka somehow didn't want him to see how weak he still was. He'd walk without help, at least until they were inside.
Slowly up the stoop, then the wait for Abby to unlock the door. Inside and up the short flight of steps to his apartment. And another wait while Abby unlocked the apartment door. Luka leaned wearily against the wall. It would be good to get inside and sit down again.
And suddenly he noticed where he was standing. Just beside the door. He looked down, he couldn't help it. Someone had cleaned the floor, and the wall, but not perfectly. Blood tended to stain. And there was a dark patch on the floor. Not red anymore, but dark. He saw himself sitting there, felt himself sitting there, leaning against the wall. Felt the warm blood through his fingers. A sensation he was familiar with, he had blood on his hands every day at work. But it was so different when it was your own.
There would be another blood stain too, he knew. He couldn't remember exactly where Brian had been, but he knew that if he looked, somewhere near the top of the steps, would be another darkened patch of carpet. He didn't look. He made himself not look. But he knew that eventually he would look, or maybe he'd notice it some day without even realizing it.
"Luka? Are you ok?" He realized that his eyes were closed and he was trembling a little. A very gentle touch on his arm. He opened his eyes to see Abby's worried face.
A faint smile. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired. This is harder than I thought it was going to be."
"I know." And Luka knew that she did know that he wasn't just talking about the trip home. "Come on, lets go in and you can sit down."
Luka let Abby take his hand; he could have made it on his own, but she did want to help, and they went inside. Just a few steps to the couch.
Luka had to smile again as he sat down. Abby had made everything ready for the night. Made her intentions very clear. Sheet, blanket and pillow all neatly folded along one end of the couch.
"I see you found everything ok," he said.
"I've been here before."
"Not often enough, and not lately." Luka kept his voice light.
"I don't recall you inviting me lately." A smile.
"Would you have accepted if I had?"
"If you'd asked Carter too."
Of course.
A silence. Luka closed his eyes. He was tired. The silence stretched on.
"Do you need anything?" Abby finally asked. "Something to eat, maybe?"
"No. I just had lunch."
"But that was hospital food. Maybe something better?"
"Are we talking about cooking, or calling out for something?"
"Whatever you want. I'm here to serve." Under the lighthearted words, Luka could hear just a little bit of strain in her voice.
"Maybe a little later."
Luka finally opened his eyes. Abby was fidgeting.
He knew what she was thinking. This had been a mistake. It had seemed like a good idea, but now she was regretting it. She was looking ahead to all the days they would have to spend together, and she didn't look happy.
"How long are you off work?" he asked.
"I took this week off. I told them I might be able to work some half shifts next week, if you're feeling up to managing on your own for a little while by then."
"I'm sure I'll be able to manage."
"I'll also need to spend some time looking for a new place."
"There's no rush. You can take all the time you need." He meant it.
"You say that now," Abby said. "But you'll be sick of me soon enough, and when you kick me out, I'll need to have some place to go." Her voice was light again, she was teasing him. Or was she?
"Find a place you really like," Luka said.
"I may have to settle for a place I can afford."
The doorbell. Luka jumped a bit. His doorbell never rang very often, and the last time it had rung ...
"That's probably Ralene," Abby said. "I asked her to bring me some more of my stuff."
"I'll get it," Luka said, and started to rise.
"No, you just take it easy. I'll get it. That's what I'm here for, remember?" Abby laid a gentle hand on his arm. It was, of course, intended to keep him from trying to get up, to reinforce her words. But Luka suddenly was trembling a little. Their eyes met and Luka saw warmth there again. And a brief smile crossed her face.
"The intercom's broken," he reminded her, more to say something, to cover his sudden discomfort than because he thought she'd forgotten.
"I'll run downstairs and let her in."
"Be careful." The doorbell rang again.
"I will." Her hand stayed on his arm an instant longer, then she rose and went out.
Luka leaned back on the couch and closed his eyes. Of course he was shaking a little. He was tired. He was still weak. And hearing the doorbell again ... thinking of going out into the hallway. It had nothing to do with Abby.
He opened his eyes again at the sound of the door opening. Abby came in accompanied by another woman.
"Ralene insisted on coming up," she said. "She's dying to meet you. I told her you were tired ..."
"It's fine Abby," Luka assured her. "Hi, Ralene. Abby's told me a lot about you."
Ralene smiled at him. "Really? She did?" To Abby, "You did?"
"I've mentioned you once or twice," Abby said.
Ralene threw herself down on the chair across from him. She looked to be about Abby's age. Rather pretty, taller than Abby and a bit heavier. Blac curls pulled back into a ponytail, and sparkling black eyes. Eyes that were looking at him with undisguised admiration. "Oh Luka, it was just awful wasn't it? What happened to Abby ... and to you. I just can't imagine ...."
"We're doing fine, Ralene," Abby interrupted.
"Still … it's just so scary. This is such a dangerous city, isn't it? I don't know why I still live here. I'm so glad that Abby has a friend like you to take care of her, Luka. She needs someone to take care of her right now. It was just horrible ..."
"Abby's tough," Luka said. "She's doing great."
"You look like you're feeling a lot better already. Being shot must be awful ... I'm glad you're getting better."
"Ralene," Abby interrupted again firmly. "You need to get going. Luka is still pretty weak, and he needs to rest."
"Ok. I did sooo want to meet you Luka." Ralene rose again. "I'll call in a few days maybe Abby ... just to see how you're getting on?"
"Sure. You can call my cell number any time."
Another smile for Luka. "It was so nice to meet you, Luka."
"Same here, Ralene."
Abby saw Ralene to the door, and the moment it closed behind her Luka burst out laughing -- a laugh that lasted only an instant.
"She's ... different." he finally said, when the pain in his incision had eased enough for him to talk again.
"She's really very nice," Abby said. "She just has a talent for saying the wrong things some times. And she can be rather enthusiastic. But she's been very helpful since all this ... happened. She's brought me a lot of stuff, and my mail. I haven't had to go back at all." She looked at her hands, her good humor fading again.
"She does seem nice," Luka agreed. "But I think I'll take her in very small doses, if you don't mind." He took a deep breath. "I am pretty tired. I think I'll go lie down for a while."
"That sounds smart. Need help into the bedroom?"
"No, I can do it."
"Ok. Yell if you need anything."
"I will." Another smile, then Luka rose and made his slow way into the bedroom.
"Need help inside?" asked the cabbie.
"Nope. We're fine," Luka said. He handed the cabbie the fare and opened the car door. A deep breath and he stepped out, then waited for Abby to follow. She offered him a hand and he shook his head a little. "I can manage," he said softly. While it was no secret to the cabbie that he was not in the best of shape; he had, after all, picked them up at the hospital, Luka somehow didn't want him to see how weak he still was. He'd walk without help, at least until they were inside.
Slowly up the stoop, then the wait for Abby to unlock the door. Inside and up the short flight of steps to his apartment. And another wait while Abby unlocked the apartment door. Luka leaned wearily against the wall. It would be good to get inside and sit down again.
And suddenly he noticed where he was standing. Just beside the door. He looked down, he couldn't help it. Someone had cleaned the floor, and the wall, but not perfectly. Blood tended to stain. And there was a dark patch on the floor. Not red anymore, but dark. He saw himself sitting there, felt himself sitting there, leaning against the wall. Felt the warm blood through his fingers. A sensation he was familiar with, he had blood on his hands every day at work. But it was so different when it was your own.
There would be another blood stain too, he knew. He couldn't remember exactly where Brian had been, but he knew that if he looked, somewhere near the top of the steps, would be another darkened patch of carpet. He didn't look. He made himself not look. But he knew that eventually he would look, or maybe he'd notice it some day without even realizing it.
"Luka? Are you ok?" He realized that his eyes were closed and he was trembling a little. A very gentle touch on his arm. He opened his eyes to see Abby's worried face.
A faint smile. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired. This is harder than I thought it was going to be."
"I know." And Luka knew that she did know that he wasn't just talking about the trip home. "Come on, lets go in and you can sit down."
Luka let Abby take his hand; he could have made it on his own, but she did want to help, and they went inside. Just a few steps to the couch.
Luka had to smile again as he sat down. Abby had made everything ready for the night. Made her intentions very clear. Sheet, blanket and pillow all neatly folded along one end of the couch.
"I see you found everything ok," he said.
"I've been here before."
"Not often enough, and not lately." Luka kept his voice light.
"I don't recall you inviting me lately." A smile.
"Would you have accepted if I had?"
"If you'd asked Carter too."
Of course.
A silence. Luka closed his eyes. He was tired. The silence stretched on.
"Do you need anything?" Abby finally asked. "Something to eat, maybe?"
"No. I just had lunch."
"But that was hospital food. Maybe something better?"
"Are we talking about cooking, or calling out for something?"
"Whatever you want. I'm here to serve." Under the lighthearted words, Luka could hear just a little bit of strain in her voice.
"Maybe a little later."
Luka finally opened his eyes. Abby was fidgeting.
He knew what she was thinking. This had been a mistake. It had seemed like a good idea, but now she was regretting it. She was looking ahead to all the days they would have to spend together, and she didn't look happy.
"How long are you off work?" he asked.
"I took this week off. I told them I might be able to work some half shifts next week, if you're feeling up to managing on your own for a little while by then."
"I'm sure I'll be able to manage."
"I'll also need to spend some time looking for a new place."
"There's no rush. You can take all the time you need." He meant it.
"You say that now," Abby said. "But you'll be sick of me soon enough, and when you kick me out, I'll need to have some place to go." Her voice was light again, she was teasing him. Or was she?
"Find a place you really like," Luka said.
"I may have to settle for a place I can afford."
The doorbell. Luka jumped a bit. His doorbell never rang very often, and the last time it had rung ...
"That's probably Ralene," Abby said. "I asked her to bring me some more of my stuff."
"I'll get it," Luka said, and started to rise.
"No, you just take it easy. I'll get it. That's what I'm here for, remember?" Abby laid a gentle hand on his arm. It was, of course, intended to keep him from trying to get up, to reinforce her words. But Luka suddenly was trembling a little. Their eyes met and Luka saw warmth there again. And a brief smile crossed her face.
"The intercom's broken," he reminded her, more to say something, to cover his sudden discomfort than because he thought she'd forgotten.
"I'll run downstairs and let her in."
"Be careful." The doorbell rang again.
"I will." Her hand stayed on his arm an instant longer, then she rose and went out.
Luka leaned back on the couch and closed his eyes. Of course he was shaking a little. He was tired. He was still weak. And hearing the doorbell again ... thinking of going out into the hallway. It had nothing to do with Abby.
He opened his eyes again at the sound of the door opening. Abby came in accompanied by another woman.
"Ralene insisted on coming up," she said. "She's dying to meet you. I told her you were tired ..."
"It's fine Abby," Luka assured her. "Hi, Ralene. Abby's told me a lot about you."
Ralene smiled at him. "Really? She did?" To Abby, "You did?"
"I've mentioned you once or twice," Abby said.
Ralene threw herself down on the chair across from him. She looked to be about Abby's age. Rather pretty, taller than Abby and a bit heavier. Blac curls pulled back into a ponytail, and sparkling black eyes. Eyes that were looking at him with undisguised admiration. "Oh Luka, it was just awful wasn't it? What happened to Abby ... and to you. I just can't imagine ...."
"We're doing fine, Ralene," Abby interrupted.
"Still … it's just so scary. This is such a dangerous city, isn't it? I don't know why I still live here. I'm so glad that Abby has a friend like you to take care of her, Luka. She needs someone to take care of her right now. It was just horrible ..."
"Abby's tough," Luka said. "She's doing great."
"You look like you're feeling a lot better already. Being shot must be awful ... I'm glad you're getting better."
"Ralene," Abby interrupted again firmly. "You need to get going. Luka is still pretty weak, and he needs to rest."
"Ok. I did sooo want to meet you Luka." Ralene rose again. "I'll call in a few days maybe Abby ... just to see how you're getting on?"
"Sure. You can call my cell number any time."
Another smile for Luka. "It was so nice to meet you, Luka."
"Same here, Ralene."
Abby saw Ralene to the door, and the moment it closed behind her Luka burst out laughing -- a laugh that lasted only an instant.
"She's ... different." he finally said, when the pain in his incision had eased enough for him to talk again.
"She's really very nice," Abby said. "She just has a talent for saying the wrong things some times. And she can be rather enthusiastic. But she's been very helpful since all this ... happened. She's brought me a lot of stuff, and my mail. I haven't had to go back at all." She looked at her hands, her good humor fading again.
"She does seem nice," Luka agreed. "But I think I'll take her in very small doses, if you don't mind." He took a deep breath. "I am pretty tired. I think I'll go lie down for a while."
"That sounds smart. Need help into the bedroom?"
"No, I can do it."
"Ok. Yell if you need anything."
"I will." Another smile, then Luka rose and made his slow way into the bedroom.