A/N: Wow….I really have no excuse for being so late. I moved in October, I joined DeviantART, my WORD broke down for 2 weeks, and I started school, but still. I'm ashamed. I see my other favorite authors update constantly with full, detailed and well written chapters, and here I am being lazy when how many of you guys cries are reviewing and waiting. gets on knees I am so sorry again and I promise that I'll work harder and either really do well for the ending of this story and/or do my best to write some decent new stories. Plus, when I moved, I could only take a few things with me (everything else is coming up in February) and the Romeo and Juliet book wasn't one of them. ;; Maybe I could find scenes on some website….

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Chapter Six: All that Matters in a Tragedy is the Last Laugh

"GameBoy Wonder to Black Jack. GameBoy Wonder to Black Jack, do you read me? BLACK JACK! ARE YOU DOWN? BLACK JACK!"

"Dude! Chill out! I was just getting some ramen! Sheesh!"

"You gotta say 'over' when you're done speaking, Black Jack. Over."

"…You know, I think you're going overboard, Link…Over…"

"Aw, you're no fun. Are we at least finishing up the plans tonight?"

"Yeah yeah…GameBoy Wonder." A low chuckle was heard on plastic walkie-talkie in the young Hylian's hand.

While a certain shadow was lazily sipping down his dinner with his feet upon a table covered with diagrams and ideas, Skull Kid and Link were returning to the apartment. "Black Jack? GameBoy Wonder?" The wooden teen snatched the device out of Link's hand and looked it over. "Where the heck did you get these things?"

Smiling, Link took it back, throwing it into the air and catching it again while the couple got into the elevator heading to Link's home floor. "Clearance at Target. They were making room for Pokemon Wood and Pokemon Plastic coming out."

"And the names?"

"You mean Black Jack and GameBoy Wonder?" The blond Hylian snickered and pressed the button to his floor. "Black Jack is another name for Shadow Jackass, and I loved GameBoy and Robin the boy wonder growing up."

"Are you sure that was Robin?"

A beep on the walkie-talkie directed their attention once more. "Will you guys hurry up? The ramen's getting cold!"

"I hope he doesn't eat mine again."

Skull nodded in agreement then took a thoughtful look at the large metal doors in front of him, waiting to be opened when they got to the right floor. "Wait…What did you guys give me?"

"You mean as a nick name?"

Skull Kid nodded once more, looking slightly nervous.

Snickering, Link finally walked out of the elevator and smiled. "Trigger Happy."

"WHAT?! That's my name?! Why?!"

The Hylian just shrugged and walked up to his apartment door. "Well, no offense, but you're really interested in words and math and science…We couldn't come up with a name that suited you and still had that fun action pack thing." He smiled once more seeing the wooden teen's face of disapproval.

"'Bout time." The two walked into the apartment to see Dark leaning on his chair with an empty bowl of ramen noodles to his left. "Yours is in the microwave."

"Uneaten I hope." The shadow smirked to his light self and turned back to the papers.

With the $.99 packets of ramen devoured, the Skull Kid and Link settled around the table and awaited the shadow to begin his presentation. "You guys…I still have a bad feeling about this."

Dark snorted and filed the last of the papers. "You have a bad feeling when you forget to dot your i's on a test." Skull held his tongue as the dark being stood up and gave a slight bow. "Idiots and nimrods, I present to you Mission: Replaced Romeos Ruin Recital." Link gave another chuckle, but calmed fast as Dark Link resumed. "You see, the dance is on a Friday, this Friday to be precise. The next night, being Saturday, is the opening night for the one and only play, Romeo and Juliet. A new, and less talented Romeo, has been assigned." A sigh erupted from Skull, and upon seeing his worry, the shadow bared a mischievous grin. "Now, we also have a mission to save the play from this new, and less attractive, Romeo. Therefore, that's where our little friends in black come to help. With the backstage crew taking care of the latest Romeo, that's where Link gets in. I'm guessing somewhere are 10 minutes after scene thirteen. Everybody follow?" A hesitant and enthusiastic nod followed from the shadow's audience. He smirked, pulling out a new diagram, and folded it onto the table. "As for tomorrow night, Skull I need you here while Link takes control here."

The wooden teen gave another smug look. "And you?"

He smirked. "Oh, I've studied my part long enough."

The lights and dance floor were alive with teenagers moving to the beat of the music hollowing out any other noise in the cafeteria. The tables and chairs were replaced with a stereo and DJ, while the Cook's Special was traded in for party foods and punch. It was the Carnival of Time Festival Dance and whether it was for the free food, the atmosphere, or the group commotion, everyone who was anyone was there.

"Perfect…Gameboy Wonder, the victims are within range. I repeat: the victims-"

"Victims? You sound like you're going to kill them!"

"…Well, Trigger Happy, that's plan B."

"Stop calling me that!!"

"You guys! Shut it and carry on with the plan already!" The blonde Hylian sighed and rubbed his temple while the others shifted impatiently in their positions. Perched atop on of the speakers that hid in the corner on the wall, the shadow glared down at each partier like a vulture. His movements were followed by the worried eyes of Skull Kid, whom safely took his stand by the punch bowl and nervously waved to any wandering gazes. The Hylian straightened his collar and leaned on the entrance doors.

"There she is, Link." The Hylian's ears perked at his walkie-talkie as curiosity got the best of him and he swiped it up.

"Who?"

The shadow sighed on the other end of the line. "Zelda and…whoa, she replaced you fast! And with the new Romeo no doubt! Hah!" Link blinked and gawked around the crowd. A blonde Hylian girl was being escorted to the snack table by none other than-

"Bobby? What's wrong with that?"

"Well, looks like she's trying to make you jealous…Heh, good thing that won't work, right bud-"

"What?! What are they doing together? Do they look like a couple?" The walkie-talkie was silent for a moment. "Dark?"

"…What?"

"What's wrong? Answer me." Another moment of silence. "You're tone isn't cocky or arrogant anymore."

There was a pause, followed by a defeated sigh. "I just don't understand why you keep going after her, Link…"

The Hylian just stood there, rethinking the shadow's question in his head. The silence held on tightly and life him speechless. "Dark…I-"

"Is it just me, or is that Malon and Kafei over there? Hmm, never thought they'd go together." Oblivious to the previous conversation, Skull Kid passed his glance to each couple in hopes of some entertainment.

Link grunted and shoved the walkie-talkie back into his pocket. Great way to break the tension, Skull. He glanced up at his shadow friend sitting on the speakers. A knee was being hugged up to his chest by one arm while the other lounged off the side lazily. A blank frown covered his tan features. What'd I say wrong? The Hylian whispered his best friend's name sadly. What could he possibly have said that made the shadow feel bad?

Only part of the dance was over, and most of the guests had arrived. It was time for the plan to commence. Without warning, the shadow reclaimed his grin, and Skull his groan as Link announced to take their 'battle stations'.

Though hesitantly, Skull Kid moved in, pretending to sample the punch while he dug into his pocket. I small teabag-like substance emerged from his pocket with an evil smiley drawn on the side from earlier goofing off with the Hylian. "Forgive me, school, I not know my reason." He gulped and dropped a bag of powder into the refreshment. It swirled as the colors mixed for a moment, before turning back to its original tropical red.

Dark Link smirked with mischief and hopped down from his prior position. With grace that he saved for only his finest of pranks, he slid through the crowd to the middle of the dance floor. In his palm, he held an old friend. With his other hand, a lighter twitched as he snickered. "Say hello to Mr. Stinky!"

Link smiled at seeing Skull Kid groan from across the party and grinned at his best friend standing proudly as a stink bomb caused the crowd to rampage through the doors. He stepped aside as the partiers ran through, but acted quickly upon seeing his victim.

"Hey, Zel." The students retreated to the basketball court outside of the gas filled cafeteria. Link moved in for his part and leaned against the wall of the school building. "How've you been?" The young Hylian gazed at the princess with a small smile until she huffed and turned away.

"What do you want?"

He straightened his posture and stepped closer to her. "To talk." Zelda sneered and shoved his shoulder back. "Hey, c'mon, Zel. I'm sorry about before, really. I just got nervous in front of you and-"

"It was him wasn't it?" Zelda gave a disgusted frown, rubbing her bare shoulders with her gown shawl.

The Hylian playfully cocked his head. "Pardon?

She practically spat. "That shadow creature." His smile faded upon hearing her words. "It's no wonder he'd ruin the dance just like he tried to ruin the play." Without warning, the princess looked up with hope and leaned up towards Link's face. "Just like he was trying to ruin us. Link, I'm sorry I slapped you. I just got so mad, but then I realized it was because of that shadow that our relationship was falling apart. But now it's different." She leaned closer to him yet. "Right, Linky?"

"…What the…HELL are you talking about?!" Link, too, leaned forward, and yelled even louder. "What the hell's your problem?! Don't you ever talk about him that way again! And what are you talking about 'relationship'? There's no, and will never be ANY relationship between us again! He's done nothing to you, except expose how big of a b-"

"Hey!" A sudden fist came out of nowhere and sent Link banging off the wall, while Zelda dashed behind her date. The Hylian used the wall for a quick lift and gazed up to his attacker. Bobby, the new Romeo and current escort of the princess, was massaging one of his knuckles. "Are you trying to steal my girl, elf?"

Link wiped a small trail of blood from his chin and glared back. "Hard to steal something that's given out for free, wouldn't you say so, Bobby?"

The taller boy gave what seemed like a growl and grabbed Link's collar, shoving him harder into the brick wall. "You're gonna regret that, asshole!"

Link readied himself for a hard impact against his eye and winced away…but nothing landed. Actually, he had fallen, rather clumsily to the ground in an uncomfortable crouch. In the opposite direction, Bobby, too laid on the ground, cradling a darkening bruise with his hand.

"How's it feel to be knocked so lightly by a shadow, ya freak?" The dark being glared fiercely and cracked his knuckles slowly, as if trying to send to new wave a fear with each loosened bone. "Don't. You. Dare. Touch. Him." He whispered each word with venom, almost causing Bobby to back away in retreat.

Surprised, Link looked up his friend. His best friend. He gave a faint smile and cocked his head once he was being lifted to a straighter stance by none other than Skull Kid. "Now you've done it. The protective part of him is lose and you're to blame again."

He smiled, but turned his gaze upon hearing a small gagging followed by a painful yelp. "It's past your beating time anyway, ya freaking jackass!" Skull Kid sighed and raised Link's arm over his head, saying it was just incase Link stretched something. He gave a faint smile, knowing no matter how many times they fought physically, Dark had always saved his most intense combat for anyone who threatened what he cared for; friends being one of them.

The crowd growing signaled Skull to move him and Link out of there, knowing well enough that their dark friend enjoyed attention to his skills, and would rather bask in his victory for another moment.

Link sat on the bench near the parking lot, watching some of the lot bravely venture back into the cafeteria and continue the party. A small smile snuck onto both Link and Skull's lips at seeing Malon and Kafei return to the party unharmed. The smile soon grew into a grin when a dark and proud silhouette walked away from the wall of the previous scene. "Miss me?"

The two chuckled in response until Dark grabbed Link's chin and turned his face sideways, relieving a nasty bruise. He muttered and looked at it closer, narrowing his eyes. "That bastard…"

Calmly, Link swatted his hand away with his own and shook his head. "I'm fine. You've hurt me more before than he could."

Dark Link grunted and pocketed his hands into his pants. "Yeah, but that was me, Link. I don't like anyone else touching you like that." The Hylian made a slanted smile and looked down, as did the shadow.

A moment of awkward silence passed before the wooden chuckled and stood up from his seat next to Link on the bench. "Well, tonight's plan went smoothly, don'cha think?" The twins nodded and both smiled again. "I just wonder how the play's going to turn out." The smiles turned into grins and another small groan of what was to come came out of Skull Kid. "Let's just go home, you guys. I'm tired as it is."

They nodded, Link beginning to rise. He yelped at an arm pulling him in by the waist and hoisting him over a shoulder. "What the heck are you doing? You jerk, put me down!"

The shadow only smiled and cocked his head back to better view his friend while beginning to walk down the sidewalk. "You've been through a lot tonight and might've pulled something. Just let me do this."

Link grit his teeth and struggled. "I'm fine! I'm healthy! I'm freaking well enough to walk on my own!" The shadow chuckled. "Shadow, I swear. I'll beat you senseless if you don't let me go!"

Dark Link stopped and shifted his back, now staring back at Link with a smug smirk. "And my shoulder blade is in the perfect position to slam hard into your crotch if you try to escape. Following, cripple?" The Hylian simply muttered something about turning Dark into a cripple, but soon calmed and hung limply, and rather grumpily, over the shadow's shoulder. "Like I said, no one hurts you like that."

Meanwhile, the wooden teen just gawked at the two with his jaw dropped. "Good Goddesses…" He sighed, rubbed his forehead and started after the twins. "I'll never figure that friendship out. Never."

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A/N:

I'm sorry for finally updating with a sucky chapter! If anyone's still with me (cries) I have an announcement. When I started writing this story, I was a Link/Any Girl Fan. As most of you know by now, I'm am the complete and total opposite. Buuut, for the people I attracted in the beginning, I can't make this a yaoi story. Can you see how I'm in a pickle? Then it hit me. The next chapter is dedicated to Chatwyn cause, dammit, she was the most recent review that made me realize what a jerk I've been to be ignoring you guys like this! I am going to make two, count 'em, TWO endings! One that'll go with the people who dislike YAOI! And one for the people who believe YAOI is just plain..awesome! Understand? Got it? Comprende, por favor?...Bien.

Last, I want to wish you all a Merry Holiday Time! La La La!