(Inspired by a Sue who had a magic tile. Dear readers, are you also worried about the amount of stories here that gets the breath of life from a Sue's stupidity? Because I am. But feel free to suggest other, more elevated, sources of silliness.)

Chapter 7: Lucius Malfoy Has Magical Bathroom Furnishings

Twenty-seven Aurors sprung out of the darkness at Lucius Malfoy. "We have you!" Mad Eye Moody proclaimed, his magical eye rolling in its socket ecstatically.

"Oh yes?" said Lucius, taking something from his pocket. "Well, let's see how you fare against my MAGIC TILE!" He held up a small turquoise tile at them. Most of the Aurors fell down upon their knees in terror.

"Aaaaaah! Nooooo! It's magic!" they screamed in despair.

"What are you doing?" Mad Eye Moody said, looking at them in disgust. "Of course it's magic! We're wizards!.....and witches," he added hastily.

"Oh yeah!" One of the Aurors said, and got up. The others followed his example.

"Now then," said Mad Eye Moody, and they all turned back to Lucius Malfoy...... but he had already disapparated into the darkness.