ACT 2

Scene 1: I Swear I Saw… - School Parking Lot

VP: You did it?

Rex:nods

VP: What's the problem then?

Rex: I swear I saw a floating staple gun. It was just leading me into his office.

VP: They have medication for that you know.

Rex: I feel so guilty. I couldn't even give that pop quiz to my students today. I couldn't even fall asleep during that insipid lecture on deodorant and hygiene the nurses gave. Here take it. Thrusts bloody staple gun into Melinda's hands I couldn't put it back.

VP: I'll do it. We wouldn't want to arouse suspicions, now would we.

Melinda exits

Rex: I'm pale as the school mac-and-cheese from the cafeteria. I keep hearing the pledge of allegiance they played over the P.A. system again and again. I may never be right again.

Enter Melinda

VP: Here. Have a little drink; it will make you feel better. One sip and all of your problems are gone.

Takes a swig from flask

Hands flask to Rex

Rex: All the alcohol in the world couldn't cure me of this.

VP: We have to be at the meeting in an hour. Don't forget. I'm so ashamed of you. Suck it up and I mean that flask too.

Scene 2: Missing the OC - Staff Meeting

VP: I better not miss the OC for this stupid staff meeting.

Notluf: Hey, Dr. K, will you go get Dr. Digs? I'm missing the OC, too.

Dr. K exits

Awkward silence, odd humming, etc

Re-enter Dr. K

Dr. K: Oh my God, he's dead! Murder points, murder points.

Rex: Oh my God, who will be the new Principal?!?

VP: Hey, I think Mr. Rex will raise my sala… I mean, I think Mr. Rexford would make a good new Principal.

Notluf: All right, we'll have a board meeting to announce the new Principal.

VP: Not another meeting!

Dr. K: This is horrible! What evil could have done this ominous deed.

Scene 3: To Fairfield I – Secretarial Office

Secretaries were listening in to the conversation of 2.2

Secretary 1: You don't think we'll be blamed for this, do you?

Secretary 2: Maybe we should go to different schools, to avoid suspicion. I'll go to Greenwich.

S1: To Fairfield I. Our separated fortunes will keep us both the safer.

Exit secretaries