1/8/05

NOTE: why?

Cyborg and Robin confirmed today that I am indeed a vampire. Well, BECOMING one anyway. Today I am supposed to go to the movies with the titans. They think that it might help me to be "happy". (I don't do happy either; I don't know why they thought it would help.) So, now I'm just getting ready to go. Can I tell you something, diary? I'm kinda hoping to sit by Beast Boy. (I can't even believe myself sometimes) Oh! I need to get back to changing. I'm not wearing my usual blue. I'm wearing the darkest, most morbid black I can find. I'll also lie on the eyeliner extremely thick. Maybe if I look like a vampire, it won't be such a shock to everyone when I become one. I'll be back later, diary.

After the movie:

Oh My God! – Oh! No!

At the movie everything was fine, (I was sitting next to Beast Boy). I got bored in the middle of it and started looking around the dark room. I could actually see, it wasn't like night vision or anything, but I could actually see everything perfectly. Beast Boy squeezed my hand and gave a smile. (I don't know why he did that, but whatever). I started to hear a song it my head. It was so beautiful and… and it was the song I heard from that night at the park. I looked above me and I saw HIM. Just like how I remembered him. He was sitting on a banister hanging from the ceiling. His eyes stared straight through me. They were glowing white. His hair was black and spiked. He was wearing all black and a black trench coat. Then he smiled at me showing his fangs. He motioned for me to come up to him. I began to levitate but Beast Boy grabbed my foot and pulled me back down.

"Rae, is everything ok? Are you feeling sick again?" Beast Boy asked.

"No-" I said robotically.

Beast Boy turned back to the movie when Starfire began to ask him a question. At that point no one was looking at me and I flew up to the music. He was singing the song – here is what I remember of it:

"Let darkness consume you

Let the darkness hide you from the light

Give in to me

Give in to your darkest dreams

You are now a child of the dark

Come with me"

(Could no one else hear that? Could no one hear him?)

He reached his hand out to me and I took it. I sat on his lap.

"Hello sweet one, remember me?" he said.

I did not speak.

"Let me finally make you into one of us," he lifted his left hand and bit his finger. It began to bleed.

BLOOD

"Hurry and drink before it is all gone, sweet one," he moved his finger toward me and placed it on my shut lips. I did not open my mouth. (I still had some control I suppose). Eventually he pulled it way. I noticed there was something on my lips.

"Yes, lick it, clean it off" he whispered

I licked my upper lip and realized I had just licked his blood which was left from his finger. It was delicious, so I licked my lips dry of it.

"More? Oh not yet, wait a while,"

My heart felt like it was going to burst. It beat harder and faster. It hurt. I wished it would pop out of my chest to end the pain. It hurt so badly. And finally it stopped. There was no more breathing, mo more movement within me. My head fell backwards and my body went limp. The whole room went black.

Then I awoke to HIS lips on mine.

"Now was that so bad?" he asked.

I wanted to take in a breath to answer, but I noticed that I was not breathing. I WAS NOT BREATHING!

"What did you do to me?" I rasped.

"Only what your wildest dreams ever wanted. Now you are connected to the night… to the darkness."

Then he floated down to the theater floor and set me down.

"Go now to your friends. Say your goodbyes, sweet one. But hurry, it may be soon when you need to feed. I will come for you later, love." Then he disappeared through the floor.

I stumbled down the walkway to the seats and planted myself in my seat by Beast Boy.

"Rae, where were you? Did you go to the bathroom or something? You're not sick right?" He asked sympathetically.

"I was sick --" (and I don't think I'll ever get better).

I think I'm going to throw up. I'll write later diary.