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Sean and I started cleaning and straightening up the house before the kids woke up. I was surprised he didn't hate me for not telling him about Vanessa, but I didn't have a choice. I had explained that to him. I had a burning question I wanted to ask him from the start, and I think we're close enough now for him to tell the truth.
"Sean?" I asked, rearranging the photos of Brock and Vanessa.
"Yeah?" he asked, putting the vacuum away.
"I have a question," I said. I finished folding the blankets and set them at the end of the sofa.
"Ask away," he said.
"It's about Ellie..."
He stopped and sat down on the couch. "What about Ellie?" his voice was hoarse.
I sat down next to him. "Why did she kill herself?"
HE blinked back tears. "She'd always been messed up, Emma. She used to cut herself. As she grew up, the depression became worse. I guess she couldn't handle it."
I put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry," I said.
He inhaled deeply. "I'm okay. I've gotten over it."
"Did you love her?" I dared to ask.
He swallowed and said, "I was starting to. But she would never let me close."
I held back tears. "And what about me? Did you love me?"
"Emma," He turned to me. "I loved you from the moment I saw you. In Simpson's class, remember?"
I nodded.
He put his hand on the back of my neck. "I wanted to be with you. I didn't want you to think I was only after your body. Is that what you thought?"
I nodded. "Yes, that's why I said yes to Spinner."
He hugged me. "I love you."
"I know, but..."
"But what?" he asked, pulling back.
"I don't know what to do. I don't know what to tell Vanessa or Brock about Spinner and me getting a divorce. I don't know how to tell Vanessa that you're her dad. And what about Emily? Are you going to tell her anything? And what about us? Are we going anywhere, or is this just a bad case of unrequited love?"
"Do you want this to go anywhere?" he asked.
"You know I do," I answered.
"Then the rest will fall into place, I promise," he said.
"I hope so," I said. I opened my mouth to say something but I was interrupted by a small voice saying "Mommy?"
I turned and saw Vanessa. How long had she been standing there?
"Baby," Paige said to Jason, "I have to go get something. I'll be back in a few."
"Do you want me to go with you?" he asked.
"No that's okay, it wont take me very long."
She walked the short distance to Spinner's room and knocked on the door.
He answered and let her in.
"I just wanted to tell you I was leaving," she said.
"DO you want to leave?"
"There are too many memories here, Spinner. I can't stay," she started to cry and he put his arms around her.
"Paige, stay here with me," he pleaded.
Her eyes flew open; did he still care? "Spinner, after what happened..."
"I know, I know. I'm sorry about the baby," he said.
"Jason got Manny pregnant," she confided.
"He did what?"
"He said it was before we married, and I believe him, but still, Manny? I can't believe this is happening. My world has been turned upside down. I don't think anything will ever be the same again."
"Paige," Spinner said, taking a deep breath. "I love you."
Paige held back tears. "I love you too, Spin, but I have to go."
"Please," he begged. "Don't leave me again."
"Don't make this harder than it has to be. You'll be fine, okay? I have to leave, Spinner. I'm married."
He swallowed hard. "Don't forget what you had with me, okay?"
"Never," she kissed him for the last time and left.
Sean and I started cleaning and straightening up the house before the kids woke up. I was surprised he didn't hate me for not telling him about Vanessa, but I didn't have a choice. I had explained that to him. I had a burning question I wanted to ask him from the start, and I think we're close enough now for him to tell the truth.
"Sean?" I asked, rearranging the photos of Brock and Vanessa.
"Yeah?" he asked, putting the vacuum away.
"I have a question," I said. I finished folding the blankets and set them at the end of the sofa.
"Ask away," he said.
"It's about Ellie..."
He stopped and sat down on the couch. "What about Ellie?" his voice was hoarse.
I sat down next to him. "Why did she kill herself?"
HE blinked back tears. "She'd always been messed up, Emma. She used to cut herself. As she grew up, the depression became worse. I guess she couldn't handle it."
I put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry," I said.
He inhaled deeply. "I'm okay. I've gotten over it."
"Did you love her?" I dared to ask.
He swallowed and said, "I was starting to. But she would never let me close."
I held back tears. "And what about me? Did you love me?"
"Emma," He turned to me. "I loved you from the moment I saw you. In Simpson's class, remember?"
I nodded.
He put his hand on the back of my neck. "I wanted to be with you. I didn't want you to think I was only after your body. Is that what you thought?"
I nodded. "Yes, that's why I said yes to Spinner."
He hugged me. "I love you."
"I know, but..."
"But what?" he asked, pulling back.
"I don't know what to do. I don't know what to tell Vanessa or Brock about Spinner and me getting a divorce. I don't know how to tell Vanessa that you're her dad. And what about Emily? Are you going to tell her anything? And what about us? Are we going anywhere, or is this just a bad case of unrequited love?"
"Do you want this to go anywhere?" he asked.
"You know I do," I answered.
"Then the rest will fall into place, I promise," he said.
"I hope so," I said. I opened my mouth to say something but I was interrupted by a small voice saying "Mommy?"
I turned and saw Vanessa. How long had she been standing there?
"Baby," Paige said to Jason, "I have to go get something. I'll be back in a few."
"Do you want me to go with you?" he asked.
"No that's okay, it wont take me very long."
She walked the short distance to Spinner's room and knocked on the door.
He answered and let her in.
"I just wanted to tell you I was leaving," she said.
"DO you want to leave?"
"There are too many memories here, Spinner. I can't stay," she started to cry and he put his arms around her.
"Paige, stay here with me," he pleaded.
Her eyes flew open; did he still care? "Spinner, after what happened..."
"I know, I know. I'm sorry about the baby," he said.
"Jason got Manny pregnant," she confided.
"He did what?"
"He said it was before we married, and I believe him, but still, Manny? I can't believe this is happening. My world has been turned upside down. I don't think anything will ever be the same again."
"Paige," Spinner said, taking a deep breath. "I love you."
Paige held back tears. "I love you too, Spin, but I have to go."
"Please," he begged. "Don't leave me again."
"Don't make this harder than it has to be. You'll be fine, okay? I have to leave, Spinner. I'm married."
He swallowed hard. "Don't forget what you had with me, okay?"
"Never," she kissed him for the last time and left.