RING RING RING...

Dammit... I'm sorry, that's probably Jay-chan and Piccolo... I'll have to continue my story later.

I walked over to the small, black phone and lifted the headpiece off of the receiver. "Hello?" came my nervous reply.

"Tiffy?"

"That would be me."

"It's Jay-chan. I'm sure you know Piccolo is here."

"... Yeah..."

"What is going on over there? That jerk left you all alone at a party?"

"... Yeah..."

"Piccolo says you're just sitting there and taking it. Have you talked to-- -"

BOOM BOOM BOOM

The entire apartment seemed to shudder under the weight of the fist pounding on my door. I sucked in a breath, hearing a faint "What the fuck?" from Piccolo on the other end of the phone.

BOOM BOOM BOOM

"Tiffy, what the heck is that?"

"I think that's him. Hold on."

I set the phone down on the couch and crept over to the door. Peering into the peep hole, I could see the distorted face of my significant other. I gripped the dead bolt between my sweaty fingers and unlocked the door. Once I'd undone the bolt and the chain, I opened the door to face a very flustered boy of about six feet. The memories of how alone I'd felt at that party and how angry Piccolo had been at me came flooding back as I stared into his acidic green eyes. I swallowed a snarl.

"This shit is over..." I whispered.

"No fucking kidding!" came his forced reply.

I felt my jaw drop. What did he mean by that? He's agreeing with me? He should be pissing his pants right now!

He stormed into my apartment, the floorboards moaning their protest with each heavy step he took. His chest heaved with the extreme effort he seemed to be making to keep himself from exploding right there in my living room.

"I didn't leave you," he stated in an even tone.

My stomach bent over backward inside, "What?!"

"I didn't leave you!" he shouted, as if I hadn't heard him correctly the first time.

"What the hell do you call what you just did?!" My cheeks burned with outrage and I felt the bile in my stomach begin to rise.

"You pushed me to it! You wouldn't drop it!"

"What, and I was supposed to sit there like your lap dog and take all the shit you give me and swallow my pride when you want to be with me again?! Do you still not understand that you can't treat me like that and expect me to be fine with it?"

His eyes narrowed and he raked his fingers through his hair, "There you go again! What's your problem?!"

"My problem is that you didn't care at all about how I felt!"

"Well, you wouldn't stay at the party! What about how I feel, huh? It's always about you!"

"What?! It's quite the opposite! I finally went to the stupid party, I stayed even longer than YOU in the end, but when I wanted to tell you how I felt, you left in a huff and you still don't care about my feelings! Now, who is this about?"

His fingers raced through his hair again and I swore I saw steam rush out of his ears. A red flag went up in my head and I opened the door.

"I don't want you in my home with that attitude..."

"WHAT ATTITUDE?!"

"Lower your voice... The people around us deserve to sleep too."

"FUCK PEOPLE!"

My eyes narrowed and I saw him flinging his arms in rage through the fine lines of my eyelashes.

"Get out. This is over."

The large male glowered at me before he turned and walked out the open door. Securing the lock and chain, I raced over to the phone.

"Oh my God, he's finally gone!"

"What the hell happened?" came Jay-chan's startled voice.

"I called it off."

"Whoa! Really?!"

"Yeah... He was being really mean and..." I felt a tear slide down my cheek, warm and wet and painful, "... he didn't care about how I felt at all..."

"That must have been really tough, Tiffy... I'm proud of you and you can bet Piccolo is too."

I heard a loud snort on the other end of the line and smiled despite myself.

"So now what?" was my only reply.

"Now, I think Piccolo can go back home to you."

"Okay."

"Are you gunna be alright?"

"I guess..."

"Do you still wanna talk?"

"Not really. There isn't much else to talk about..."

"Okay." I could tell she wasn't buying a word I said, but what could she do?

"I'll talk to ya later. Thanks for calling."

"No prob, Tif. Piccolo, go home!"

"Bye."

"Bye."

I dropped the headpiece back into the holder and sat with my hands between my legs, the warm tears spilling down my cheeks. I could barely feel them as they trickled past my nose, clinging to the tip of my chin before taking the fatal dive into the carpet below.

Piccolo's gunna be home soon and you guys still don't know why he's with me in the first place. Lemme continue my story, it'll help get my mind off of things.

So, I totally forgot about my mysterious visit from Piccolo that morning and spent the rest of my day chatting with various friends on-line or on the phone. Later that night, as I was stirring a pot of spaghetti sauce, there was a loud knock on my door. I glanced at it and raised my eyebrow. I wasn't expecting anyone that night; midterms were right around the corner and everyone I knew was cramming 'til all hours in the night. Still, I managed to pull myself away from my concoction and answer the door. I'd barely undone the chain when my visitor barged right through the threshold and into my living room.

"It's not up yet!" came a deep baritone snarl.

I turned around and let out an ear-piercing shriek. The poor Namek fell to the floor in the fetal position almost instantly, clutching at his large, pointed ears. All I could do was stare in wonder... and then I remembered the so-called "dream" I'd had earlier. That was no dream and something in the pit of my stomach was telling me that I was in big trouble.

I ran into my kitchen and fetched the suffering green man a glass of water. I padded over to where Piccolo was writhing on the carpet and knelt before him, offering the glass as some form of consolation. A green, clawed hand reached for the glass. His large fingers wrapped around the base of the glass and began to squeeze until the glass burst all around me. I jumped back, surprised by this sudden action. Piccolo looked up at me from under his fierce brow ridges, his expression terrifying.

"I told you I wanted that first chapter up by sunset, TA. Where the fuck is it?!" he winced at his own tone and I relaxed a little bit, realizing my voice had a lot of power over Piccolo and his sensitive hearing. But still. I was nervous as all hell.

"You're never gunna believe this...." I started with a strained smile, "I fell asleep after you left, totally missed my class for the day, and I completely forgot about our little visit! It was like sudden amnesia or something..."

Piccolo's eyes were piercing into my own, his upper lip quivering with barely concealed anger. He dragged himself to his feet and began a slow march toward me. "Sudden amnesia or something?" he snarled in a low tone. "You think I'm fucking stupid?"

"Holy hell!" a young, youthful female voice echoed from the doorway and both Piccolo and I turned to see my best friend, Jay-chan, standing in the doorway, her eyes wide like saucers.

Piccolo turned on her, grabbing her arm, yanking her inside, and slamming the door all in one swift motion. "Oh this is just great! Now I have to deal with two of you idiots!" The Namekian practically threw Jay-chan at me. "TA, you go tell this bitch what's going on. Since she's involved now, she might prove useful in convincing you to write that story for me." A wicked grin flashed across his emerald face. My stomach clenched up but at the same time that evil look sent desire coursing through my veins. Pushing the invading feeling out of my quickly clouding mind, I took a very disoriented Jay-chan's hand and led her to my bedroom for debriefing.

Piccolo was suckling water from the kitchen faucet when Jay-chan and I returned and I stifled a giggle before heading toward the cabinet to hand him a cup. The demon lord snatched the cup out of my hand with an indignant snort. "So she knows?"

"Yes," I reliped in a soft voice.

"Good, now know this, for every day you miss a chapter assignment, I will break one of your friend's bones."

Jay-chan let out a squeak of protest and my eyes flew open. I felt the fires of rage building and I spat out a nasty, "I don't think so!" before I could help myself.

Piccolo turned on me, his cape snapping back behind him. I knew I was in for it big time... so I did the only thing I could think of. I screamed.

Several moments later, Piccolo was stretched out across my couch, an icepack on his forehead.

"Oh Kami-sama..." he moaned.

I looked down at the defeated warrior and felt a bit guilty. Jay-chan, on the other hand, didn't.

"You're a big jerk, you know! You can't just use me as a means! I hope Tiffy screams at you until your ears bleed! You're not scary!"

Piccolo looked up at me, a pleading look in his eyes. I'd never seen that look before, not even when the Piccolo on Cartoon Network looked at Gohan, and it increased my guilt ten-fold.

"Hey Jay-chan, maybe we can bitch at Piccolo later, huh?"

"Hell no! This jerk wants to break my bones!"

The Namekian warrior let out a pitiful moan of protest, "Alright! I won't use you! Kami-sama... Maybe it's better that way. Then I won't have to hear your annoying voice anymore!"

Jay-chan flew to Piccolo's side, flames ready to burst from her ears, "Annoying voice, huh?!"

"Jay-chan!" I called her back.

The long haired woman marched to my side and glowered down at the ailing man on my couch. "You want your story written, you're gunna have to do US some favors! First of all, Tiffy will write your story if and only if you help her get out of this horrible relationship she's stuck in."

Piccolo's eyes flew open and he looked over at me.

Jay-chan continued, "Her boyfriend is a total jerk and treats her like crap. Of course Tiffy is too forgiving to actually leave him so I think you could do her a whole lot of good. Maybe you could even beat her boyfriend up for us!"

"I don't want any more humans involved," he stated in a flat, even tone.

Jay-chan pouted, "Fine! But you have to help her; teach her to be more independent and assertive in the face of that asshole. She has to take steps toward freedom and I'm holding you responsible for her progress! For each Jay-chan approved step Tiffy makes in the right direction, Tiffy will be assigned a five page chapter to your anti-Piccolo fan fic. For the conclusion of the story, Tiffy must break-up with her boyfriend willingly, enlightened by you, Mr. Jerk!"

I stood back in wonder as my best friend dealt the cards to both Piccolo and me, without so much as a fearful glance toward the demon lord on my couch. Her bold demeanor seemed to have Piccolo stupefied and he didn't so much as utter a protest, he just watched her yammer away.

"So that's the deal, Mr. Piccolo! Any questions?"

Piccolo just lay there and my throat went dry. Piccolo was gunna help me out of my relationship? How would that work? Would he even care enough to have any kind of effect?

"No questions? Good! Good night you two and don't stay up too late now!" Jay-chan winked at us as she headed toward the door. She stopped suddenly and looked at me, "Oh yeah Tif, I loved your newest update on DevART, Piccolo needs some more clothes though!" And with that, she left the both of us in an atmosphere of absolute powerlessness and embarrassment.

"You're an artist too?" came his question after a few long moments of dead silence.

"Yeah."

"Fuck."