//----Hey everyone! Thanks for reviewing, and I'm sorry that this took so long to get out to you all. I know that I didn't get enough reviews, but maybe this time you will for me. Please! Its all I ask. Tell me what you think, because it helps me to be a better writer. Well I hope that you like this chapter. The first song in here (in italics) is "What Dreams Are Made Of" by Paolo and Isabella. You can download it on Kazaa. The second song is "My Immortal" By Evanescence. It's a beautiful song and I hope that you either buy the cd or download the song. Its really one of the best songs I have ever heard. Btw, I don't have time to mention all of you reviewers and answer your questions if you had any. I promise that I will in the next chapter. Anyway, on with the story!
I felt his cold, soft
hand pull me further into the darkness. I remember trying to get him to
stop, to explain what he was doing, but after trying several times I gave up
and followed him. I also followed him because I needed a break from my
thoughts of Blaise and my problems with him. We
walked through his bedroom and out to his terrace, which was larger than
mine. A broom stood at the corner and a black chaise lounge was off to one
side.
"I just wanted to take you here to show you what I see at night. To see the stars, to get away from everything. To try to take your mind off my prick of a cousin," he said staring at the night sky.
"Thanks. I needed it," I said looking at him.
"I know," he replied quietly.
"Did you know that there is a constellation named Draco
that is in the shape of a snake?" I said, thanking myself for studying the
stars all those nights.
"I know, my mom named me after it. She loves the stars. I just can never find it," he said.
"I see it now. You don't?" I asked.
"No," he said with a quizzical look on his face. I got up off the chaise lounge and stood behind him. I grabbed his right arm and pointed his arm in the direction of the constellation.
"You see it?" I asked.
"Yeah, wow. I
didn't know that it was that one," he said turning around and staring at
me. I thought for a second that he might have kissed me, but he broke the
gaze and stared towards his broomstick.
"Uh...You want to go for a ride?" he said motioning towards the broom.
"No thank you. I'm afraid," I said looking at my shoes and then back up towards the night sky.
"Wow. Miss Perfect afraid of a damn broom. Who would have guessed?" he said sarcastically.
"Fine, I'll go," I said, trying not to show how afraid I really was.
"Good," he said.
He grabbed the broom and mumbled a spell that made it turn on. He got on and motioned for me to sit behind him. I put one leg over the broom and grabbed his back to help me on. His muscles rippled under my touch. He was well toned from years of Quidditch.
His heel kicked off at the ground and we were off. We flew steadily faster around the school and then over the roof. I felt so free, so alive and safe at the same time.
"This is...beautiful," I whispered in his ear.
"I know," he said softly turning his head to face me.
Have you
ever seen such a beautiful night?
I could almost kiss the stars for shinning so bright...
He flew
over by the Quidditch pitches and we flew around by
the field with my grip on his waist becoming tighter as he flew faster.
Everything in my life seemed so far away in these few moments and nothing
mattered to me. I didn't care that I no longer talked to Harry or Ron,
about Blaise or that stupid bet I had with Lavender
and Ginny. Everything seemed so pointless, so worthless and so out of
touch with what I was feeling at that moment.
And when I see you smile I go...oh...oh...oh...
I would never want to miss this...
In my heart I know what this is...
I felt us slow down and then stop in midair. He stared up at the sky,
his silvery blonde hair reflecting the moonlight that shone on it. He was
simply beautiful. Everything about him was perfect-his face, his body, his
entire being was without flaw.
"I see the constellation," he said.
"I see it too. Tonight the sky is beautiful," I replied.
"Now you know how I see it when I'm up here," he said.
"It's definitely different," I
said. Then he flew down about three feet off the ground. He stared
into my eyes and leaned in to kiss me. I knew that I shouldn't be doing
this, but his face was so needy, so loving and caring.
This is what dreams are made of...
I've got somewhere I belong...
I've got somebody to love…
This is what dreams...are made of…
Just
then, I realized what was going on in my life. I had just found the person
that I cared about was cheating on me and I was kissing Malfoy of all
people. The one that was a prat to me over
damned McGonagall catching us. This was stupid. I
also didn't want my heart broken again.
So, I
pulled away.
"I'm sorry...I just can't...can't do this," I said, trying to hold
back tears because I wanted him so badly, but I just couldn't. I hopped
off the broom and ran off into the darkness, trying to find my way back to the
castle.
/*/*/*/*/*
I watched her leave, watched her run away. Just as I had just watched her so many times before and it seemed to me that all I was
going to be doing was watching her.
I flew angrily up into the night air, trying to release all of the emotions that had built up in the last few moments. I flew faster in those seconds then I ever have in my entire life playing Quidditch. I let the anger and hurt flow freely then, just screaming at the sky for letting this happen to me.
I flew past the Quidditch
pitch and saw damned Ron Weasley and that girl...what
was her name? Lavender. That was it. Ugh. He
made me sick - him and that damned saint who could do no wrong, Potter. Or Pothead as I liked to call him because he was a well known
stoner boy now.
At that moment I hated her. I hated Hermione
with every damn fiber of my being - for teasing me and leading me on when she
knew full well that she wasn't going to follow through. What a fucking
prude bitch.
And, as hard as it is for me to admit, I was stupid for thinking that she would - with me. After that whole thing with McGonagall I guess she hated me. God fucking damn it. Why the hell was I such a prat? Oh wait, I remember. I'm Lucius Malfoy's son. I have been raised to be like this all my life. I was beaten from the time I was seven. I remember the first time he hit me. And, although I was spoiled by my mother I never felt complete. I guess that I was just trying to find that in her.
Why do I always have to build these walls so
high around me? I wonder...
/*/*/*/*/*/*/
I went through the doors into the castle and bumped into something. It was
a tall, muscular figure, but I couldn't see who it was because my eyes were
blurry from crying. I sank down to the floor and prayed to the Gods that
it wasn't Blaise.
"Hermione?" a soft voice asked me.
"Yeah?" I said, wiping my eyes and then glancing up - it was Harry.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"Yeah, I'm fine," I said letting out a small laugh.
"No, you aren't. What happened?" he asked. It surprised me that he still cared. He sat on the floor next to me.
"Nothing," I said staring at the floor.
"Well, I'm still here for you when and if you want to tell me what happened," he said.
"Thanks," I said softly and then wiped my eyes again.
"I must look so pathetic right now," I said, laughing to myself.
"No, you don't. You look beautiful as always," he said. I shot him a glare.
"Don't start that crap now, Harry," I said.
"I'm not starting anything. I'm just stating the truth," he replied. Good reply. Nice save, Harry.
"Do you want to go back to your room?" he asked me. I nodded yes and he got up from off the ground, helping me up. I stared into his deep eyes. They were full of truth and understanding.
"Thank you," I said.
"For what? I was just being a friend," he said.
"Well, thank you for being my friend, Harry," I replied.
"No problem," he said, motioning for
me to link arms with him. I did gratefully, thankful that I had someone on
my side for once.
/*/*/*/*/*
I sat cold and alone on the terrace on that chaise lounge that Hermione had been sitting on just about an hour ago.
Why was I such a dick? Was I even wrong? I don't know and frankly I don't give a damn. She doesn't deserve my anger - the little bitch. Screw her - I didn't need her.
Who the hell am I turning into? Some pussy whipped bitch? I don't think so. Me, getting upset over a damned prude Gryff? Screw that.
I grabbed a key out of the pocket of my trousers and walked inside and over to my bedstand. I put the key in the lock and opened the door.
I pulled out a glass and some vodka. I poured a shot and knocked it back. It burned in the back of my throat, but I didn't care. I wanted to get drunk or at least relieve the anger building inside. I poured another shot and drank it, but this time it didn't burn as much. It actually felt kind of good.
I stared at my reflection in the mirror and saw
how I had changed. I looked older than I appeared. I could pass for
20 or 22. I looked into my own eyes and saw pain mixed with
anger. Why did my life have to be so fucked up?
I'm so tired of being here
suppressed by all of my childish fears
and if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
because your presence still lingers here
and it won't leave me alone
these wounds won't seem to heal
this pain is just too real
there's just too much that time cannot erase...
For the first time in my life I realized what a pathetic loser I really
was. Sure, people thought I was a sex God and maybe I was, but I don't
feel complete. It's sort of like
something is missing in my life. I never had any true friends unless you
count Crabbe and Goyle, but
they moved away to Durmstrang right after fourth
year.
I poured some more vodka into the shot glass and drank it. I felt more relaxed, more free after that last shot. My emotions poured out and flowed freely within my mind, just letting me have some peace and let me think for myself. It felt good.
That vodka bottle was looking more and more enticing by the moment. I took out three more shot glasses and filled them all up in a row. I drank them all fast, and my head felt like it was going to float off.
I didn't need that damned bitch
Hermione - all I needed was that bottle of vodka and
some time to myself.
/*/*/*/*
Harry held my hand, which I knew was shaking, in a calm way-not pressuring me
to do anything, but just be his friend. That's all I wanted.
We reached the portrait of the mermaid and I whispered "Pixie Dust" to it and walked inside. Harry looked uncomfortable and I kissed his cheek.
"Thank you," I said quietly.
"It was nothing," he said.
"You are such a good friend. I don't know how I could've ever doubted you," I said.
But, then, at that moment, I remembered him jumping me and
kissing me. I pushed the memory out of my thoughts.
"You deserve a good friend, Hermione," he replied.
"Thanks. Same for
you," I said. There was an awkward pause and I stared into his eyes.
"Goodnight Harry. I'll see you tomorrow for breakfast. Please, please don't tell anyone about this," I said.
"I won't. It's not my information to tell. Sweet dreams," he said, turning around and walking away.
I watched his long stride, his black hair, his broad shoulders and noticed how much he had changed as well. He was so calm and collected. He never really lost his temper and gave great advice.
Hermione, don't fall for him. You can't. You just can't. Go to bed and think things through. My problem is being so impulsive and never thinking about anything. This time I'm going to do it right.
I walked into my room, jumped on the bed and fell into a dreamless sleep.
/*/*/*/*
I woke up that morning with a wicked hangover, and pulled the curtains shut to try and get some sleep. But then I looked at the clock and noticed that it was 7:45, and that I had fifteen minutes to get down to the Great Hall for breakfast, and then that meeting after. I walked into the bathroom and splashed my face with water. I had small dark circles around my eyes, and I noticed that I had a cut on the side of my hand. I looked over to the bedstand and saw that a broken shot glass was on the floor. I guess that's what I cut my hand on last night when I passed out. I ran over to my closet and threw on my robes. I grabbed my books and started the walk down to the Great Hall.
I sat down at my table, and poured a cup of coffee, and grabbed a roll. Blaise sat down next to me, and I knew something was up by the look on his face.
"Dray, looks like you had a rough night last night? Were you with Parkinson? She can do that to you," He said laughing.
"No. I don't want to talk about it. I have the worst headache ever, and I forgot that damned spell. Do you know it?" I asked.
"Yeah, you say 'alcoolico bevuto' and flick your wand over your head. This spell has got me through some tough hangovers, it works really well," He replied.
"Thanks," I said and then performed the spell. It worked, just as he said it was. I tried eating, and noticed Granger over at the Gryff's table, and I watched her stare aimlessly out the window, sitting next to Potter. Potter?! I thought that she hated him. Guess not. She played with a curl by her face, and she looked so beautiful doing that. I finished my roll and coffee, and looked out at the lake, watching the Sun reflect off the water. A voice ripped me out of my daydreams.
"Students! Students! May I have your attention?" Dumbledore said standing up. The whole hall quieted down.
"All seventh years stay at the Great Hall after breakfast, for an important meeting," he said, and all of the younger students left. We all moved up to the front, and I stared out of the window, trying not to pay attention.
"I made all of you stay, to explain about your seventh year trip. It isn't really a trip, students. It is an adventure, that will test you to your limits. One that will hopefully teach you lessons that will help you live your lives outside of Hogwarts. You will be partnered up, and sent somewhere with that partner. You will be staying at this place for two months, with your partner. You will not be able to use magic, and you will only be able to bring minimal clothing and a toothbrush. You will be leaving tomorrow. Be ready by eight in the morning. See you all then," He said and turned, walking away, and leaving us all to talk.
"What the hell was that?" Blaise whispered.
"I have no fucking clue," I replied. I watched everyone around me, talking about what this trip was going to be like, and who they were going to be partnered with. This was so fucking stupid. I wanted to get away, but now I was probably going to be stuck with fucking Neville Longbottom for this trip. Or maybe, just maybe, it will turn out to be something that I would never, ever expect.
//---------
I hope that you liked this chapter, and that you will review for me. Please, please please!!!! I really appreciate it. I would hope for 80 reviews by the next chapter. PLEASE its all I ask!! Thanks.
xoxo, tinkerbelle
