"You poofed him!" Willow cried.
"Did not!" Buffy said indignantly.
"Did too!"
"You were the one with the floaty pencil thingy. You could have slipped. You could have done the poofing!"
"Oh no, you said the thing that made him poof. You all saw it, she said the poofing thing and he just went poof! It was total poofage by Buffy there."
"It was Xander! He said something and then it happened!"
"Oh sure, everybody blame me."
Tara explored the area where Spike had vanished, brushing her finger across the floor.
"There's no ash. I don't think he's dead wherever he is."
Buffy pouted.
"But I wanted to poof him."
Xander grinned at her.
"Feeling more like your old self, Buff?"
"Yeah, I think it must have had something to do with Spike when he poof- I mean disappeared. Any idea why?"
"That's easy," he answered. "See, in the movie, the girl made a wish that her baby brother be taken away by the goblins-."
"Oh that's sisterly love..." Buffy interrupted.
"She didn't mean it. She didn't know it would happen. Anyway, I think Spike must have wished Giles away so the goblins took him. And now we wished him away, it probably forfeited the gifts he got in return for Giles."
"Okay...so where's all the goblins? Don't we get presents for getting rid of Spike?"
"Of course," said a voice from the balcony.
"G-goblin King," Tara stammered as they all turned.
Jareth skimmed the air above the rungs of the ladder and touched down on the shop floor, his star-spangled cloak shimmering from neck to ankle. His eyes and jagged teeth glinted in his handsome face.
"Hey, his pants aren't tight enough -ow!"
Xander rubbed his ribs where they had connected with Willow's elbow.
"I am feeling generous as always," purred the Goblin King, pretending not to have heard him. "What is it you ask of me?"
"We want Giles back."
Jareth's gaze met with the Slayer's and caused her to shiver.
"Not that generous. I am afraid it is not in my power to give back a person wished away by another. You may only ask for who you told me to take away, and even then I do not give them up easily."
"But I don't want Spike. You can keep him. What about a trade?"
The Goblin King shook his head.
"You're lying!" cried Xander. "It's so obvious you can hand over Giles whenever you feel like it! Beat it out of him Buff!"
Jareth laughed but it was cut short as the Slayer slammed her heel into his chest. He flew backwards across the shop and to their surprise, evaporated through the wall. Just as suddenly, he materialised near the front door.
"That's not fair!" Xander checked himself as the Goblin King raised an eyebrow. "Why do I always say the predictable thing?"
"Two of you asked that the vampire be taken away," Jareth said as he approached them. "Those two are free to run my Labyrinth. I give no more, no less time for two people but I will make it harder. Almost anything goes in my land. You have thirteen hours in which to solve it, as Alexander here already knows."
"Will you turn Giles into a goblin?" Willow winced.
Jareth smiled.
"Not to worry, little witch. I can find better uses for a librarian."
He gestured to the balcony, beyond which a swirling portal to the Underground opened where the forbidden spell books should have been. He swished his black cloak with a flourish, engulfing himself in a ream of shadow, his very form twisting elegantly out of shape. The blackness gave way to a shining white of striking feathers and a small owl shot through the dimension gateway.
Buffy scaled the ladder without a second thought and dove after the Goblin King. The others, however, were stood stupefied.
"Xander, you have to go after her!" cried Willow.
"What use am I? I haven't seen the movie in years. I can't solve puzzles!"
"You still helped with the wishing. You have to go through." The witch bit her lip in thought then patted his shoulder reassuringly. "Tara and I will try to find something to help but in the meanwhile, go!"
She shoved him towards the ladder, with her Insistent Face glowering at him should he look back, and watched as he stepped into the other world. The rippling portal closed behind him with a gloop.
Tara and Willow stared at the return of the forbidden section of books and promptly scrambled up the same rungs. Having little clues as to what danger their friends were to face, they set about searching the dark arts for aid.
"Oi! Hands off the leathers!"
Spike snatched up the offending goblin and booted it across the room. A crowd of on-lookers squealed and retreated to the many ledges and hidey-holes that filled the walls around the throne. The floor was strewn with rags and children's toys - a reminder of the Labyrinth's usual guests. A crooked clock with thirteen hours instead of twelve ticked idly near a window.
"Bit behind on the times," the vampire spoke to the room. "You should go digital. Get yourself a whole extra eleven hours."
A stifled groan drew his attention to the dip in the middle of the room where something was lying covered in a heap of ragged blankets. The scent of helpless human lured him nearer, his face contorting from hunger. Spike threw himself onto his prey and bit down into the soft flesh of its neck. A volcanic scream escaped his lips as the white-hot pain of electricity engulfed his skull. The vampire keeled over on the stone slabs, writhing and roaring obscenities.
The would-be victim sat up and squinted at his attacker, barely noticing the sting of the teeth-marks at his throat. He wrung his fist in the direction of the blurred Spike and berated him in slurred speech.
"Bug'roff! Co'founded pests after my scotch. 'S mine, an' you can't have it!"
Spike rolled his pounding head to look at the drunkard.
"Giles? For hell's sake, you've been here a night and you're as pissed as Bridget. No wonder you got fired."
The ex-Watcher raised his other arm and brandished the bottle of liquor. "S-Spike! You sen' me here! I'll bloody kill you!"
He swung the bottle at the vampire, intending to smash it on his head, but only managed to fall on his adversary and begin a childish scrabble. Spike fended him off with one hand and relieved him of the alcohol with the other.
"I need this more than you, mate."