Email 21

"What even really matters anymore?" Syd asked Vaughn.

"I mean, my mom everyone, and is probably going to ruin planet earth. Will is going to die because he is the world's most annoying character...uh, I mean because he didn't listen to me about Danny's death. And now, well, you seem to be distant from me too. What the heck is wrong Vaughn, just tell me."

Vaughn speaks rather "robotically" "Nothing is wrong Sydney, I don't think you should tell me so much about your personal life. I am only your handler. Do you have any questions about your mission?"

"No, I don't have any questions. What the heck really matters anyway. Gosh, you make me so very mad!" Syd is about to leave when all of a sudden she gets an idea.

"Actually, I do have a question."

"Yes, what is it?"

"Do you think, on my mission, I mean, do you think I have to wear clothes if it is a nude beach, I mean."

"OHHHHHH man, um, I mean...what do you think Sydney?"

"Well, I think I will really stick out if I am the only person who is wearing clothes, maybe I should give you a preview, you know, just to make sure their isn't anything wrong with me that would reveal I am a spy."

"Technically, that would be fine considering I am just helping you with your mission, I am not getting too personal or anything. Oh, by the way, this is going to be a serious mission, maybe I should go too."

"Maybe!" Cried Sydney

Commercial break.

Will Vaughn notice when Sydney is naked that she is actually a man.

Will Will be killed while doing a chair. Will Jack Bristow ever

get over his wife and have some CIA fun for himself. Will anyone

wonder what happened to Sydney's robot baby? Well, find out after a word from our sponsor.

"Here's a song about gold fish, yes backed and not fried gold fish..."

End of commercial break:

"I really think that we should." Said Vaughn.

"Yes!" Cried Sydney. "Yes! Yes! Yes! Oh, god, Vaughn..."

"Hey!" Cried Vaughn. "We're not at that part of the scene yet!"

"Oh, shoot, you're right. Sorry, back up a bit."

"Vaughn, I'm not sure that's so great an idea."

"Why aren't you sure that's such a great idea?"

"Well," She paused to think a bit. "I'm not sure it's a great idea because, well, my partner is going to be there, and I kind of want to get it on...I mean, um, get the stuff that we came for, not spend the whole time in a threesome...I mean, getting it on with you."

"Oh, well then." Said Vaughn. "I won't come then, if you're sure you don't want to have a huge orgy...I mean, if you don't want to have a huge orgasm...I mean," Vaughn closed his eyes, trying to think of what he wanted to say. "I mean, if you don't want to get the information in a timely and good manner."

"Of course I want to have a huge orgy...I mean a huge orgasm...I mean, get the information in a timely and good manner."

"Well then, let's get it on right here." he paused for a moment. "I mean, no, that is what I meant. It is personal Sydney, let's get it on, right here, right now."

Sydney looks at him questioningly, he nods. "Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Oh, God, Vaughn, Yes!" She pulls off her clothes and then Vaughn's.

"Oh, god, you're a man!" Vaughn yells.

"Is that a problem?" She asks seductively.

"NO!" He yells. "As long as you can pretend to be a dead Boban, I don't care."

"What?"

"As long as you can pretend to be a dead Boban, and sit in that chair--No, that's Will, who is dead" He cocks his eyebrows questioningly. "--then I'll be just fine."

"Oh." She says. Then she looks down. "But you're a woman."

Vaughn looks down. "No, I'm not," he looks down. "I thought that was the normal size."

"No." She says. "That's not the normal size. That's small. Real small." She ponders: that's why he thought I was a man...woah! "Exactly how many people have you had sex with?" She asks.

"Um..." He said. "Um..."

Commercial break

Will Sydney realize that Vaughn is a virgin because all of his other girlfriends made fun of him?

Will they ever go to the nudie beach?

Will any plot expose itself?

After these messages, we'll be right back!

"There were, two giant goldfish, those baked and not fried goldfish,

who said they'd get some penutbutter and make themselves a sandwich..."