Disclaimer:
I do not own Rockman X/Megaman X in any way. The characters of X and Zero do not belong to me. All of the non-canon characters in this story are my own creations. The reploid anatomy design is my own creation. Please don't steal.
Important:
The rating for this chapter is PG. There are a few mild curse words used, but nothing major. There is a fighting scene, but no blood or serious injuries occur.
This is not intended as shonen-ai or yaoi. You may take it as such if you want. However, don't get angry with me if you think it is.
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Reploid Anatomy 101 – Equilibrium and Balance Centers
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Gravity is a Harsh Mistress!
...Ow ow ow.
Another instance of balance and equilibrium failure occurs when a reploid's internal equilibrium sensors, usually located in the head unit, are off balance or out of alignment. This can occur for several reasons. If the reploid has experienced a series of rapid directional changes at a speed great enough that his processors cannot keep up with the momentum, direction, and equilibrium alterations, his internal equilibrium systems will become misaligned as they attempt to compensate. Also, should the equilibrium sensors become damaged due to injury, they can malfunction. Both instances will result in dizziness and disorientation. A head injury sufficient enough to damage the equilibrium sensors will often result in a concussion-like state.
Should the reploid suffer damage to the equilibrium sensors that causes them to register an imbalance in weight distribution that will result in damage to the reploid should the reploid fall over, the system attempts to correct the weight distribution. A purge of all unnecessary weight occurs in order to minimize potential damage from a fall. This includes purging any substances contained in the synthetic digestive system at the time. The result is that after a head injury, resulting in severe dizziness and concussion-like symptoms, a reploid is likely to throw up any contents of its stomach.
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The silence of the room was broken by a soft hiss as the reploid recharging capsule set against the wall released its seals and the doors slid open. Inside laid a slender male form in a blue bodysuit, his black hair ruffled haphazardly into his closed eyes as his chest rose and fell rhythmically.
The world came back to Rockman X in a sudden burst of processor activity as power was channeled to his higher processor functions to bring him out of recharge shutdown mode. As his green eyes blinked open, a sigh escaped his lips. X hated using the recharger, even if it was necessary.
For a moment, he just lay there, staring up at the ceiling but not making out more than a blur of color. Then, with a huff of breath, X levered himself up to a sitting position and ran his hand through his unkempt hair. As he shifted his weight and started climbing out of the capsule, he tried to ignore the irritating tingling sensation all across his synthflesh as the tactile sensors recalibrated themselves as they came back online. It was like this every time after a stint inside a recharge capsule.
A complete blackout, not even dreams, which X often enjoyed during normal sleep cycles. Followed by the annoying reactivation and recalibration of all of his sensory systems. It always took some time for his optics, audio, tactile, scent, and taste systems to realign themselves to proper functioning levels. Until they finished recalibrating, X was going to be rather out of it. His hearing was fuzzy, his vision blurry, his nose itched, his mouth felt full of fuzz, and his skin tingled all over. X groaned as he set his bare feet on the carpeted floor and straightened up. 'Well, at least my fuel cells are back at full capacity and my energy levels have returned to optimal.' X grumbled mentally as he shuffled across the room toward where he knew the door to his bathroom waited.
Usually, an abrupt shock to his tactile systems would bring the calibrations around quickly and stop that annoying tingling. A face full of cold water was in order. Followed by a hot shower.
X's train of thought was abruptly derailed as his shins and knees slammed into something sturdy and padded and X went sprawling to the carpet, face-first.
"Ow ow ow ow ow." X moaned into the plush pile of the carpet, whose color he couldn't distinguish at the moment. Blinking to try to speed up his focus, X turned to regard his attacker.
Large, semi-squarish, padded, a curve here, a depression there. 'Right, the chair. But wasn't it over there?' X thought in confusion as it felt like his skin attempted to crawl laps around his body.
"Damnit Zero." X grunted, levering himself up. He'd probably thought it would be hilarious to rearrange X's furniture before he left the night before. "You and your stupid pranks." X grumbled as he activated his proximity sensors to warn him of any more incoming furniture. 'Hrm. I don't remember my room dimensions being this big. Maybe I need to recalibrate the proximity sensors too. That's never happened before though...'
X sighed. "Shower first. Then I'll be able to deal with Zero." He started off towards his bathroom door again, shuffling across the carpeted room.
X reached the spot his sensors told him there was a door, he was pretty sure it was his bathroom door, it was in the right place, after all, even if it wasn't the right color. 'He had better not have repainted my rooms.' X growled mentally, picturing himself happily throttling Zero.
X reached out and pulled the door open. The first thing that registered to him was, 'bright, white.'
'Damnit he did repaint, at least its not hot pink. No, don't think about it. Shower. Shower first.' X stepped forward through the doorway, but his leading foot stepped into something soft and yielding and X yelped and pitched forward as he lost his balance and landed face down in a lot more soft yielding stuff.
'What the hell?' Was the first coherent thought in X's mind at that point.
That was closely followed by, 'white.'
Then, 'soft.'
And then X focused his sensors on the strange stuff he had just fallen into and took a look at what it might be.
99 percent H2O.1 percent various trace particulate elements.
Crystalline molecular structure.
X blinked, still face down. 'Snow?? In my bathroom???'
And then the cold registered to his skin as the tactile recalibrations completed themselves. His systems began to register the beginnings of damage that translated to pain in his extremities and face as the below freezing temperatures began to frost over the outer layers of synthflesh and interfere with the tactile sensors buried under the skin. X bolted upright out of the snowdrift he had been lying face down in for the past three minutes, sending powdered snow flinging off of his back and arms to settle on the ground and in his hair.
"YEEAAAARRRGGGG!!!!!!!!"
Two floors below him, in the ski lodge common rooms, mugs of hot cocoa clattered and spilled as nearly 20 vacationing Maverick Hunters, bundled up in stylish scarves, mittens, ski jackets, ski pants, boots, and caps; as well as nearly 30 additional assorted vacationing humans and civilian reploids, jerked and jumped in surprise and apprehension.
Mara winced as she picked her mug back up from the ground and set it on the table in front of her seat on a couch. "This does not bode well..."
"Don't worry Mara," Meridian soothed. "I'm sure the commander isn't as upset as he sounds." She added nervously as she turned her head to peer up the staircase. "I hope."
"Now, now, ladies. No need to worry." Jax soothed as he hopped over the back of the couch they were sitting on to perch on the padded back. "Zero made sure to be prepared for grumpy-morning X."
"He did, did he?" Mara frowned skeptically as she turned to regard the reploid in question. Zero was currently occupied with three pretty young snow bunnies across the room by the hearth in an overstuffed chair. A reploid redhead, and two blonde human twins. One on each armrest and the third curled up in his lap. Zero grinned and flirted as though he was some sort of demented, longhaired, girl-crazy Santa. Mara sighed in exasperation.
"Well," Angel put in hesitantly as she rustled her wings in a shrug, "at least Commander Zero is an equal opportunity womanizer..."
"Yeah," Tempo sighed wistfully. "How do you suppose he does it? I bet it's the hair. It's gotta be the hair." Tempo tugged morosely at his own short, green hued locks.
"Moron." Vixen shoved him off the edge of the table and dropped into the space next to Angel, her fluffy tail-tip twitching in aggravation.
"Hey!" Tempo yelped as he picked himself up off the floor.
"Anyway, back to what I was saying." Jax interrupted before it could escalate into a fight. "Zero made sure X wouldn't be too grumpy this morning. Left him a nice hot breakfast, his favorite too. We even rented his ski gear already and laid out some clothes. We had to borrow Todd for his boot size, though; he's the same as X. And Zero sprung for the lift ticket. Everything's taken care of."
"You got that right. All X has to do is relax and enjoy himself. Don't worry, he'll be fine." Zero grinned as he walked up behind them, his long blond hair swinging across the back of his red and white ski jacket as his gold scarf hung behind him like an extension of his hair. Upon hearing X's wake up call, he had disentangled himself from the snow bunnies and headed over for the closest congregation of the 0th and 17th units.
"I don't know..." Hawke frowned as he turned from the windows to the left of the group. "Are you sure his favorite breakfast is blueberry waffles? I've never seen him eat them before, and he is usually in the cafeteria at the same time I am in the mornings."
"Of course I'm sure." Zero frowned. "They just never make waffles with fruit in the mess hall. You'll see. He'll thank us for such a nice breakfast." Zero nodded, a grin on his face.
"ZEEEEEEROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Another bellow reverberated throughout the lodge. More mugs clattered as people jumped.
"Ah. And that, ladies and gents, is my cue." Zero smiled proudly, bowed graciously to the ladies on the couch and spun away, marching for the stairs.
"600 zenny says X at least punches him, if not more. 1000 says one or both of them will be bruised or injured by the end of the day." Tempo grinned, looking around hopefully for anyone willing to take the bet.
"No way." Mara stated flatly.
"Nuh-uh man." Jax shook his head. "Those are practically sure things. Either they'll get into a fight, or it'll be the result of the bet you made last night with Zero. No way I'm handing over 1600 more zenny to you."
Mara pulled a portable comm. device out of her pocket and started dialing a number.
"Who you calling?" Hawke asked, pointing to the hand-held device.
"Resort Management. They'll need to know who to bill for any damages. So, guys," Mara turned to regard everyone from the 0th and 17th that were in earshot, "Who's it gonna be? Headquarters? X? Or Zero?"
The response was unanimous. "Zero."
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Zero smiled to himself as he hopped up the old-fashioned-style synthetic wood staircase, taking the steps two at a time. He certainly had to hand it to himself. Things were working out brilliantly. Of course, X would be a little miffed, that was understandable. But it was nothing Zero couldn't handle. In fact, he was counting on it.
Now, X was a self-proclaimed pacifist. He disliked fighting, and absolutely hated killing. He was always willing to find another way besides fighting and killing. Which was all well and good when there wasn't a war or a maverick threat going on. However, despite what X claimed, deep down, he was a protector at heart. He defended others, those who couldn't defend themselves. Be it with words, or his buster. And he was damn good at it too. When push came to shove, and other lives were on the line, X pushed back. And X could push a lot harder than just about anyone else. X knew this, and that was a good part of why it took so much for him to start pushing back.
X didn't like hurting others. He'd stand up for others; he did it all the time. But when it came time to stand up for himself, against just about anything less than life-threatening circumstances, X lost his backbone. It wasn't that X didn't get angry or upset at others; it was that he didn't show it very often. Now, in Zero's expert opinion, bottling up all that irritation and annoyance and just plain old-fashioned anger couldn't possibly be healthy for his best friend. So, he had set out with a mission. See to it that X had an outlet for all that repressed frustration. Zero had long since made it his own personal mission to make sure to irritate X whenever possible so that his best friend could blow off some steam without hurting anyone else. Getting to poke and tease and irritate X until he finally lost his cool was an added bonus.
Zero was one of the very few people who could get X to lose his calm, smiling demeanor. Most of the others tended to be mavericks that were putting other innocent lives in danger. The only thing that could really set X off was having others put in danger. Zero thought that the mavericks providing an outlet for X was a good thing. Not even he could stand toe-to-toe with X when he really cut loose. He could come close, but he knew X could probably kick his chassis from here to the moon if he really wanted to. However, disregarding when X really got angry, when it came to releasing some of that pent up tension from everyday incidents that X didn't respond to, Zero was fully capable of taking whatever frustrated anger X decided to vent on him.
X never really set out to seriously hurt Zero, of course. Not even in the worst temper losses he had had in the past. They both knew what the other could handle, and Zero was capable of handling a lot more than anyone else X might have taken his frustration out on. Zero would also drag X off to sparring sessions whenever he could. All the better for X to vent some tension and for Zero to get the itch to start a fight out of his system after a period of maverick inactivity. And currently, X needed to vent some tension. He may not realize he needed to, but Zero knew.
Zero was worried about his best friend, and he wasn't the only one. The past week had wound X up tighter than a spring. Between blaming himself for not preventing the hostage situation, and the situation itself, X had been driving himself ceaselessly all week. Nothing frustrated X worse than having others in danger and being unable to protect them. It's why he couldn't stay retired. He'd try his best to solve things without violence, but when all else failed, and there was still a threat to others, X would strap on his armor and head out to face it.
The first part of the past week, X had been trying to find a way to get the mavericks to release the hostages. Even though the likelihood of the mavericks agreeing to such a thing was all but nonexistent, X had had to at least try. When that failed, he had worked feverishly to plan a way to get past the defenses the mavericks had set up while still reaching the hostages quickly enough to prevent the mavericks from executing them. And the whole time, the fact that simply busting in there, and rushing to free the hostages, would result in most of them being killed before even the fastest reploid could reach them, was eating at X. He had wanted nothing more than to rescue the hostages as soon as possible. Instead he had had to sit out there, unable to act, despite all his vaunted power, without endangering the hostages himself.
The frustration and self-recrimination had driven X to avoid eating and sleeping until the situation had been resolved and the hostages were freed. That was not at all a healthy attitude to have. Even his unit had noticed how on edge X had been all week. It had to be bad for X to be on the edge of losing his temper that noticeably. So the 17th's squad leaders had discussed it and had decided to approach Zero about it.
The 0th had just finished their own mission ahead of schedule, so Zero was able to head over to the hostage situation to make sure X was ok after Mara's call had come through. Which was a good thing, considering they were in the middle of the diversion assault on the mavericks while X had infiltrated the base on his own to free the hostages. Zero had tracked down Todd, who was the 17th's lead strategist and learned just how badly X had been taking care of himself the past week. Todd hadn't even been able to finish his worried explanation before Zero had taken off after X.
Zero found X just in time to see him confront the maverick's leader, who had been lording it over the hostages. The maverick had started pummeling X into the ground when it became apparent he was having trouble fighting back. X didn't have enough energy reserves left to use anything but the standard buster settings and even that was pushing it. The maverick boss didn't find it nearly so funny once Zero's saber was buried hilt deep in its head. Luckily, Zero had arrived in time before X took any serious damage to anything other than his pride. They'd gotten the hostages out safely, but X was still wound up with thwarted frustration over having been too low on energy to effectively protect and rescue the hostages. It hadn't helped that he'd been ready to fall over from energy depletion at the slightest touch by the end of the day.
Zero had already decided that X needed to unwind, and he was going to make sure he did. Even if it meant kidnapping him to get him to take a real vacation and relax away from the everyday stress of HQ. Besides, doing something like that was guaranteed to get X to vent some of his tension. Zero was going to make certain that X was doing okay, even if it meant he'd end up somewhat maimed in the process.
Arriving at the door to the room he had booked for X, Zero didn't even pause to knock. Pushing the synthetic wood door open, Zero strode in with a bright grin on his face. "Good morning, X! You bellowed?" Zero stepped inside the spacious old-fashioned style room and glanced around for his little buddy. Zero blinked. X was nowhere in sight. "Hmm." Zero walked forward into the carpeted room, passing the table and chairs set up with a covered breakfast, a couple armchairs, and passing the recharge capsule to nudge the bathroom door, next to the bed, the rest of the way open. "X?" No X. With a frown, Zero headed around the bed and approached the door to the balcony that overlooked the panoramic mountainside the lodge was settled up against.
Even before he reached the doors, he could see that X was not on the balcony, but he continued toward the doors to make certain. Just before he reached them, he heard the door shut behind him.
"Zeroooo..."
That sudden chill that heralds the coming of very bad things abruptly made its way down Zero's spine. Zero stiffened. "Heh heh. X... So... How did you sleep?" Zero slowly turned around to face his ticked off little buddy.
For such a short guy, X sure could project an aura of mayhem when he wanted to. X stood in between Zero and the door, still in just his light blue bodysuit and hip armor. His black hair was liberally dusted with white powdered snow and his green eyes were narrowed and locked onto Zero. His fists clenched and unclenched reflexively at his sides as he leveled a high-level death glare at his grinning blonde kidnapper. X growled.
"Not so good huh? Did you enjoy breakfast?" Zero smiled and indicated the covered dish. "It's your favorite." Zero wheedled in a singsong voice, still grinning.
X growled louder.
"Hmm, guess it got cold. Well, not to worry! Your best buddy Zero will take care of everything. You just leave everything to me and concentrate on relaxing." Zero grinned broadly as X began advancing across the room towards him.
"You..." X hissed. "You... Capsule..." X's eyebrow started twitching madly. "Kidnapped..." his fingers hooked into claws as he flexed them. "Room... You... Snow!" he snarled.
"Now, now, X. No need to be hasty here..." Zero chuckled nervously and held up his hands as he backed up a few steps toward the large glass windows that overlooked the balcony.
"Snow!" X cried. "Snow... Bathroom!! Shower!!!" X wailed, throwing his hands around wildly toward the balcony door.
Zero turned to look. "Now, X, I know recharging always throws your systems off kilter for a few, but that's not a bathroom. It's the balcony." He nodded and smiled brightly as though he had just presented the secret of the universe to X.
"RAAAARRRRRGGGGG!!!!" X launched himself over the back of the armchair that separated him from Zero. Kicking off the back and spilling the chair over backwards with a thump, X leaped for Zero, fist extended to deck him.
"GAH!" Zero yelped as X slammed into him and they both went over backwards to the floor with a massive thump. X's hands closed over his throat as he shook Zero frantically, clunking the back of his head repeatedly into the floor. Zero gripped X's wrists and twisted them apart before pulling his knee up to his stomach and kicking X off and across the room, into the wall.
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Down below in the lodge common room. Mugs clattered and people jumped as one of the window-lined stone and synthetic wood walls shuddered and some dust drifted down from the ceiling.
"Pay up." Tempo grinned as he held out his hand to Snake.
Snake grimaced and started digging into his pockets before pulling out a slim plastic zenny card. "All I've got on me right now is 250. I have to visit a terminal to get the rest."
"No worries. I can wait." Tempo grinned as he accepted the card.
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X rebounded off the wall as Zero climbed back to his feet. Tackling Zero around the waist, X sent them both tumbling into the bed frame with another crash. Twisting around and out from under X, Zero evaded his hands and caught X in a partial headlock, pulling his arm around behind him. X twisted and reared back with his head, smashing into Zero's shoulder so his grip loosened. A second later, Zero lost his grip completely and was pitched forward as X bent his leg backwards, knee bent, and kicked Zero in the back of the head.
Zero twisted as he fell and rolled clear of the bed, rolling up against the balcony windows, before getting to his knees. X tackled him again with a roar and they tumbled backwards, crashing through the window and rolling out into the snow on the balcony.
Powdered snow flew up in plumes as they thrashed across the balcony, X alternating between getting in a few good punches and strangling Zero some more. Zero dodging punches and prying X's hands from his throat as he worked to pin his furious friend.
Zero twisted out from under X again and ducked away from a punch to put some distance between them. He was suddenly brought up short as X grabbed a hold of the end of his long ponytail and jerked him over backwards with a shriek. Zero rolled away from X's knee, which would have connected with his stomach when X came down from his jump onto Zero. X launched himself from his kneeling position to tackle Zero around the knees and pitch the both of them forward into the synthetic wood railing. Which promptly gave out with a splintering crash and sent them tumbling two stories to the ground.
"GAAAAAAAH!!!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!"
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Yet another crash from above sent most people edging away from the wall closest to the disturbance. The members of the 17th and 0th unit squad leaders were not most people. They had gathered near the windows, around the couch Mara, Angel, and Meridian were sitting on, while Hawke stood near the windows that overlooked the mountainside.
Two screams abruptly resounded throughout the lodge. Eyes turned toward the windows just in time to see two intertwined, screaming figures drop out of the sky and crash into the snow bank that had piled up the night before, outside the windows.
"What the hell?" Tag blinked from where he stood behind the couch.
The snow bank was busy being blown and thrashed apart as the two figures continued to thrash around, grappling and punching. Plumes of white snow were tossed up into the air in all directions and splattered against the window. Every now and then, they could catch a glimpse of red ski jacket and blonde hair or light blue clad limbs flailing about.
Mara sighed as she stood up. "Well, I don't detect any weapons-fire. So that's something."
"Hawke flared his wings slightly, ruffling all his feathers up. "Come on guys. Let's go make sure they're both still in once piece." Leading the way, he headed down the window-lined wall to the sliding glass doors that lead out onto the synthetic wood patio that was just down the outer wall of the lodge from where X and Zero had fallen into the snow. Nearly everyone else in the lodge was edging away from the side of the lodge that the two were fighting on. As the last of the 17th and 0th units headed out the door, the three girls that had been flirting with Zero hesitated before following them out onto the patio and heading to the railing that overlooked the fight.
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As Zero tried to put some distance between them again, his foot slipped on the snowy slush that was starting to surround them, and fell face down. X tackled him from behind, just as Zero flipped over, and straddled his waist, pinning him. Zero choked as X wrapped his hands around his throat and proceeded to throttle him and repeatedly thump his head into the snow.
Both X and Zero were fully capable of bringing multi-ton force to bear with their hands and feet. X could have easily crushed Zero's throat and the wires, vocal synthesizer, metal spinal column, and the various tubes for circulation and respiration that ran through his neck. He didn't, of course. He had never intended to. Neither of them were bringing their full power to bear in this tussle. But it was infinitely satisfying to watch Zero gag and wheeze when X applied enough pressure to close off the respiration tube, which lead to his lungs. Of course, they'd both have pressure damage bruises on their synthflesh when this was over, and some damaged tactile sensors, and maybe a few minor dents, but it was nothing their auto-repair systems couldn't handle before the day was out.
It took a moment of teeth bared in a silent snarl as he strangled Zero, before X noticed that Zero was grinning despite being out of breath and having his head shaken around and throat painfully squeezed. X paused in his shaking, blinking down at Zero in confusion.
"Heh... Feel," wheeze "better?"
"WHAT!" X squawked as he stared down at the lunatic in the snow. "Do I feel better?!! Are you INSANE!!? You... You... You kidnapped me!!!" X hissed as he slammed Zero's head into the snow again, for good measure. "You dragged me off to the middle of who-knows-where! With SNOW!! And the bathroom! With the... and the... SNOW, ZERO, SNOW!!! And no shower!! Wake up... no shower, but snow!! And the kidnapping!! And do I feel better?!!"
"But, you like snow." Zero wheezed around X's clamped hands.
"Not when I want a hot shower!!" X cried as he shook Zero's head vigorously.
"W-we were worried about you, X." Zero gasped out.
X froze at that. "We?" X blinked and eased up on his death grip on Zero's throat as he suddenly realized there was no way Zero could have snuck off with him and the capsule without help of some kind. Though Zero could probably have carried the ungainly thing, there was no way he could have gotten it out of HQ unnoticed; it was just too bulky for one person to sneak around with.
"Heh, yeah. Your guys're worried about you, X. So am I." Zero winced as he reached up and rubbed at his bruised neck.
"You dragged my unit along with this!" X snarled gripping Zero's throat again.
"Heh. How do you think I knew you hadn't been eating or sleeping. Mara told me. And technically, they came to me first." Zero wheezed as X's grip tightened.
"What!?" X gasped, dropping his grip on Zero's throat and sitting slightly back on his heels, still perched over Zero's waist.
"They're all worried about ya, X. You were headed to put yourself in a bad situation and they wanted to help you out. So they called me." Zero sat up slightly and waved to the side where both of their units' squad leaders were lining the raised patio railing overlooking them.
X followed his gesture and paled when he saw everyone. "T-they saw..." he whispered in shocked and horrified embarrassment. X was always careful to never lose his temper in front of others, especially those he had command over. He knew from experience that an angry X could be not only unnerving but downright scary depending on the situation. He did not want to lead by fear or make his people nervous around him. The last thing he wanted was for people to be afraid of him.
Zero abruptly caught X's right hand with his own and pulled hard, flipping X. Zero rolled out from under, him as X fell down onto his back where Zero had just been. Zero then pinned X in the same fashion X had held him down. He pinned X's wrists above his head.
"Come on, X. We're worried about you. You seriously needed to vent before you snapped on somebody. It's about time you decided to let yourself unwind." Zero leaned over him and urged in a low voice.
"But... They..." X moaned in a small worried voice.
"Oh please. No one but an idiot or a maverick would be afraid of you. You're way too nice for your own good most of the time. Hell, you're the nicest guy I know. They are not going to freak just because you let off some steam. Come on, X. For once, just relax and don't worry about what anyone else thinks."
X sighed and slumped back into the snow.
"So how do you feel?" Zero asked with a grin.
"Cold." X grumped back. Zero just grinned.
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As the brawl wound down, the members of the 17th and 0th units relaxed. Looked like they wouldn't have to pry their commanders apart. Just as Mara was debating going down there to drag X back to his room so he could put on some proper cold-weather clothes, one of the girls that Zero had been flirting with spoke up in a worried voice.
"Sh-shouldn't you help Zane? He's fighting a dangerous maverick all by himself." Every single member of the 17th and 0th turned to stare at her.
There was an abrupt squawk from X, "What!?" as he sat up so fast he nearly threw Zero off, and stared at the blond girl who had spoken in shock.
Even Zero had to stare at the girl for a second before shrugging and saying nonchalantly to X, under his breath, "Case in point for the idiot issue."
"A maverick?? X-" Jax was abruptly cut off as Jynx elbowed him hard in the side, and as soon as Mara caught the girl's attention, dragged him away from the girl and behind Wolfe.
"Xavier is about as far from being a maverick as you can get." Mara picked up from where Jax had left off.
Jynx whacked Jax over the head with her ski goggles. "Idiot! Whatever happened to incognito," she hissed, hidden from the girl's view. "Xavier does not need screaming fangirls when he's trying to relax."
"Yeah. He's just a little high strung." Dyne nodded, picking up the explanation after Mara.
Zero's shout cut off any further discussion. "Never fear ladies! I am a trained professional!" Zero grinned confidently and waved at them from where he straddled X's waist.
"Professional!" X cried. "Professional what!?" X twisted and snagged Zero's arm, tugging him off and to the ground as X rolled over and pinned him again. Zero was laughing as X pinned him. X had to fight the grin tugging at his own mouth.
"Oh please! You have to help him!" the second blonde girl cried, tugging at Hawke's feathered arm insistently. Hawke glanced out at the snowdrift and the two best friends who looked about to either strangle each other or fall over in laughter.
Hawke shrugged, "You heard the lady, people! They need our help!" He jumped away and up onto the railing, lifting his fist above his head as he spread his wings. "For Zane!"
Mara laughed, and shouted, "For Xavier!" before leaping over the railing into the snow piled up beside the patio. A cheer ran up from both units as they joined in the charge.
"Huh?" X looked up as Zero twisted onto his side to look back at the patio and their units. Just in time to be almost completely buried in a hail of snowballs.
Half an hour later, a laughing X and Zero staggered back into the lodge, followed by their units. The entire group was shedding snow across the floor as they went. Zero dragged the thoroughly soaked and cold X up the stairs, still laughing, so that he could go change into some new clothes and get that shower he had wanted.
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X looked dubiously down the slope laid out before him. "Zero, this is not the bunny slope."
"X, you are not a bunny. We don't need to use those slopes." Zero assured him as he nudged himself up with his poles to X's side to regard the ski run.
"But I don't know how to ski! And neither do you!" X complained with a scowl. "We never would have even made it up here if we didn't have the peanut gallery along for the ride." X gestured dramatically at the rest of the 17th and 0th units tromping through the snow on their own skis.
"Oh come on, X. How bad could it be? Humans throw themselves down these slopes all the time!" Zero gestured to the slope below them.
X scowled. "Did you not notice that GPS places this as the 'Red Devil's Suicide Run' on the ski slope map? Who the hell comes up with these names anyway? I can guarantee that the humans who use this slope know how to ski." X gestured at the various rocks, short drop-offs, and numerous pine trees heading down the stretch of this part of the mountain.
"See you at the bottom!" Tag laughed as he shot past them on his skis and over the lip of the slope.
"Not if I get there first!" Dyne followed close behind him with a spray of snow.
X just watched as they headed down the slope, taking the drop-offs and avoiding rocks and trees expertly.
"You see! No problem. This'll be fun, you'll see, X." Zero grinned brightly.
"Er... But, they know how to ski. Are you sure you want to do this guys?" Mara asked worriedly, peering over the edge of the slope.
"Er..." X started, but was cut off by Zero.
"Of course!" Zero flashed a confident smile at the rest of the gathered reploids. "A little something like a mountain can't stop us! No way we're backing out of this bet."
"Wha... b-bet?" X turned to face Zero and followed his gaze to a sheepishly grinning Tempo who shrugged.
"Right X?" Zero clapped his hand against the middle of X's back. X skidded forward on his skis from the unexpected push and wobbled, the front of his skis hanging over the edge.
"Z-Zeroo!" X wailed as he flailed his arms back to try to avoid pitching over the edge. Dropping all attempts at dignity as his skis slid forward further, X dropped his ski poles and latched his hand onto the only solid object in reach. Zero.
"W-whaa!" Zero yelped as he was suddenly jerked forward as X caught his arm. Zero teetered for an instant and then fell forward into X. The both of them tumbled over the edge of the slope in a flail of arms, legs, and skis.
"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!"
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!!"
"Ahh!" Mara cried as she hurried up to the edge and looked over with dread. "Oh this is soo not good," she moaned as the others gathered alongside her.
X and Zero were picking up speed as they careened down the slope. A small avalanche of snow accompanied them as they rolled and flailed and dropped over hidden drop-offs and bounced off of rocks. One or both of them had lost skis at some point. Lost skis and discarded poles were littered here and there down the slope. Their tumble was accompanied by yelps, shouts, and an occasional scream.
Angel turned to Tempo with an uncharacteristic glare on her face. "How could you! They could really get hurt!"
Tempo winced and cringed away from the glares of the others. "I-I never said this run. Zero chose it. All I said was that he take one of the advanced slopes. I mean come on! This is X and Zero we're talking about. I didn't know they were both barely able to stay upright on skis."
"Idiot." Echo scowled, her pale ice-blue eyes looking colder than usual.
"Come on, let's go make sure they don't kill each other once they stop rolling." Hawke sighed as he spread his wings and leaped into the air to follow at a more convenient, for him, pace. The others headed down-slope as best as they could, without ending up in a repeat of X and Zero's performance.
Halfway down the slope, Tag and Dyne skidded to a stop and looked back up-slope to figure out what all the commotion was about.
"Oh scrap! Lookout!" Dyne yelped as he shot ahead, hoping to outrace his commanding officer, who was somewhere in the tangle of snow and limbs and blonde hair that was careening downhill and picking up speed.
Tag wasn't so quick, he had barely started to push off when the tangle of reploid and snow crashed into him and dragged him down with them. Dyne didn't fare much better though. It only took an instant for X, Zero and Tag to overtake Dyne and roll over him and pick him up in the mess. With a high-pitched shriek, Dyne was sucked under and into the cascade of snow as his ski poles flew off to either side. With every bounce and roll, various colorful curses and shouts of shock and pain drifted up to the others racing downhill after them.
The few reploids in the units capable of flight were already at the base of the slope and uncertain of how to stop their tumbling commanders without getting dragged into the mess themselves. It wasn't more than a moment later that the ball of snow and reploids finally came to a stop partially up the mountain. The tangle of reploids slammed into a slanted rock that sent them arcing into the air with four mingled screams of panic. When they impacted with the slope they landed in a drift at the edge of the run and their trip down the mountain came to a halt.
X staggered unsteadily to his feet, rising out of the dent in the snow he had made upon impact. Everything was spinning lazily and wobbling up and down. His internal systems were screaming at him that gravity had just gone on a fluctuation spree, the North Pole had magnetically swapped with the South Pole, and he was actually standing at a 74 degree angle to the ground.
"Ooohhh..." X staggered sideways and tripped, crashing into Zero who was just dragging himself upright and holding his head in both hands. The two went down in a tangle of limbs and blonde hair that vanished into the snowdrift.
"Oh... Oh god... Oh..." Dyne staggered up, his right hand clapped to his temple. Red reploid blood oozed down from a split in his synthflesh just below his hairline over his right eye. "Ooooh..." Dyne collapsed to his knees in the snow and caught himself with his hands; bent over he started retching.
Tag laid face up, still clenching one ski pole in his right hand, in a Tag-shaped impression in the snow, a few feet away from where Zero was unsteadily pushing himself up to his knees. X, still seeing things in swirly-vision, was lying on his side in the snow next to Zero.
As Hawke, Angel, and Meridian raced up to them, Tag slowly sat upright and glanced around. Spotting the others still racing down the slope towards them, Tag turned around and struggled to focus on the other three that had rolled downhill. Spotting Zero next to him, Tag lifted himself up to his feet and staggered over to his commanding officer. "Zero..."
Zero looked blearily up at him, blinking rapidly as things spun and twisted to his optics and sensors. "Huh?"
"With all due respect..." Tag lifted his ski pole and swung it down across the top of Zero's head. Zero yelped and toppled forward as he lost his balance, sprawling across the top of X who groaned in protest. "Stop taking Tempo's stupid bets!!!!!"
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The End
Owari
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Well, there we have it.
Hope you liked my exploration of X's character from Zero's point of view. You'll get an analysis of Zero's character from X's point of view next chapter.
Wow this chapter is 16 pages, that's as long as next chapter is.
Just to give a head's up, but not all of my chapters are going to be humor. Next one is not going to be very humorous. I hope you'll still read it though.
Please tell me how I'm doing. What do you think of the characterizations? Did you enjoy X getting back at Zero for kidnapping him? Did you like the reason I give for Zero being so irritating to X all the time?
How am I doing with the original characters? Good? Bad? Hate em? Want more of em?
Please review.