Disclaimer: Insert mildly funny random disclaimer here including the information that the author does not own the Artemis Fowl characters, KMart, or the Mary Sue in this fanfic here.

NTS: I can't believe you're breaking up with me. After all we've been through. I gave up so much for you, and now you want to call it all off. I don't believe you. I know where you live, you (!&!!!

Reviews:

MissMaryoftheSue: Thanks! salutes back

Sorceress5: Yeah, he appearantly got into trouble. : Thanks for the review!

silversilk: You know, that's not a bad idea!

neutralgal: Your wish is my command!

DarkKestrelArwenSilkeQueen: I know! I don't think I've ever written anything so suspenseful before!

harypotrfreak: Thanks!

Anonymous: I hate it when authors are buttholes, too! pretends to know what she's talking about

Princess Ariana: She finds the banana. Or Arty sends her off to look for a banana. Or something.

Wow, I was really behind on the reviews... but you all don't care about that. You want this:

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Artemis grabbed the banana from her and threw it over his shoulder.

"Hey!"

"I'll have to send you back, now."

"What?"

"To where you came from."

"But... but I don't WANNA leave!"
"I can't keep you here!"

"Why not?"

"Because you're a poorly developed character who's only purpose was to keep the story from being boring in the first place, and whom the author only threw in because she was out of ideas to advance the plot."

"Huh?"

"You don't belong here."

"But I CAN belong here, if you'd just LET me!"
"No, actually. You'd still be a poorly developed character who's only purpose had been served."

"Are you saying I'm useless?"

"Yes. The plot's alreading getting boring. We should speed this up a bit."

--Wait a minute, where'd the fourth wall go?--

"So, I have to leave." it wasn't a question.

"Yes." Artemis answered it anyways.

"Don't I get to say goodbye?"

"Go ahead."

"Goodbye!"

"Goodbye."

Artemis erased the chalk markings in the study. The girl was gone. So was the banana. Except...

Except, he was still bored. Obviously summoning something didn't help. He had barely anything to do with the last one. He made a mental note not to try that until he got some dance lessons. Maybe playing some DDR would help.

Now that's a silly visual. Artemis playing DDR.

Boy, he was bored. He had to do something about that.

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Sorry it's so short: I really don't know what's going to happen next, yet. New, longer update soon!