Disclaimer: You know, I was really surprised this morning when I woke up and realized I wasn't J.K. Rowling.
Alfonzo the Angora Sveater
Ronnzie Boy wore me even better vetter.
Than Fred.
Or Georgeevon.
I am marvoon
I have vun very strarange accionté.
I have ze yellow "Rrrrrr" (makes a cat sound)
But now I am Dobby's.
I am not sloppy.
But I am Dobby's.
Dobby is veird.
Dobby is strarange.
Dobby has hair problems.
He might havé mange.
I am a vizdomful sveater.
Why does Dumbly-Doorr not like me?
Iz it because I am not a magic hat?
Iz it that I am not a cat?
Would he prefer sockiez?
Me very like vubber duckiez.
To be a hat
That iz my dream
But it would be very much
Like cross-dressing.
So I am a sveater.
Forevermore…
I am unisex.
Of this I am sure.
Burn, Chozivon, Burn.
(Dobby finally tired of the sweater and threw it out. It is currently residing in the newly established International Museum of Natural history, next to Abraham Lincoln's hat and the recently deceased Mrs. Norris. He enjoys writing poems and taking long walks on the beach. He is currently looking for a woman to spend his life with. He prefers red wigs over brown or black ones, or even blonde ones for that matter. Hair plugs are not acceptable. Contact him online at under the username, "IamTooSexy4ThisSveater")
End Note:
Please don't try to contact Alfonzo- unless you're a wig, which I'm sure you're not (though you may want to be). It's Cocabella's birthday, and her biggest wish is for reviews,so please review! And it really is her birthday. I swear to God, hope to die, stick a thousand needles in my eye. So for Alfonzo, and for cocabella, please review! We'd be grateful.