DISCLAIMER: Okay see, I had this idea about cheese. See, I was eating cheese at the time so of course my mind was focused on my eating of the cheese. It was a cheddar cheese I think but I'm not sure because the cheese wrapper just said "cheese" on it, which is pretty self-explanatory and stupid because I bought it in the section of Stop n Shop known as the "Cheese Shop". So why they labeled a hunk of what was obviously cheese "cheese" without specifying which TYPE of cheese it was is beyond me. I mean if I want to buy cheese I go to the "Cheese Shop" section and buy cheese. Everyone knows its cheese so why the heck didn't they label what TYPE of cheese it was, since everyone already KNOW its cheese anyway since it was bought at the Cheese Shop, and we are depending on the label to find out what sort of cheese products they are buying!. . .but you probably don't care. . . Oh wow, now the disclaimer's too long. Well, long story short I was going to lure K.A. Applegate from her office with the cheese so that I could sneak in and steal the Animorphs. Happy cheeses y'all!
NOTE: Okay, to make up for my obscenely long and cheeseful disclaimer I'll let you all go with a brief note - I love Shawn Ashmore. Hee hee, bet you thought I forgot all about that, huh?
F-RECAP-LE: Ah, it appears that the yeerks are hiding something **gasp** Jake, Cassie, and Tobias (poor Ax must fly surveilllance) discover some suspiciously locked rooms. Oh my goodness. Well, they proceed with their plan (namely, smashing movie projectors so the poor people can't watch their movies **sob**) and narrowly escape getting caught. The theater is now movieless, so I guess people will have to leave, huh? Oh and Jake and Cassie make out. Bet that's all you guys remember, right? Anywhoo, back to Marco and Rachel.
Marco -
Rachel and I flew away from the others and traveled in silence. Which was nice. Rachel's a very sweet girl when she's not saying or doing anything.
Where are you going?
Uh-oh. I prepared for the niceness to go flying out the window.
What do you mean? I asked.
I mean, why are you heading to Cassie's house? Shouldn't you be heading home? she asked.
Oh. Um. I don't know. I responded. It was the truth. I didn't know. I probably just didn't feel like being alone.
Whatever. It's your ass that's gonna be grounded when your dad comes home.
I think not. I said. If I know my dad, he is going to walk your mom into your house. He's a gentleman like that.
Figures. He'd be bugging my mom every step of the way. Like father like son, I guess. she replied hotly. I caught her harsh tone. A monkey would have caught it. What was up with her?
Why are you mad at ME. I demanded. It's not like I did anything wrong! It's not like I thought 'Hm, how could I piss off Rachel beyond sanity?'
Right. Whatever.
What? I swear, I don't do that!
So all your idiotness just flies out of your butt then? No warning?
We reached Cassie's barn and landed on her rafters. Rachel prepared to hop down, but I stopped her.
Rachel, what the hell is your problem, anyway? This isn't just about you. It's not like you're the only one dealing with this.
Go home Marco.
Listen, we have to deal with this togeth -
Our "heartfelt" dramatic, daytime-TV conversation was interrupted by a short strangled scream from the house.
Erek. Rachel said. She shoved me away and demorphed and I followed. We stormed into Cassie's living room. Or at least, what used to be Cassie's living room. It looking like the devil had come up from hell and spewed all over the house. There was yellowish-white cream or something everywhere. I saw broken glass, strewn flowers, and various birds were pecking at the formerly green carpet. I sighed. I'd never know what the hell was on Rachel's psycho mind now.
"Jordan! Sara!" Rachel yelled. There were some thumping noises, as what sounded like a herd of buffalo came tromping down the stairs. Jordan and Sara stood before us, smiling innocently and looking as clean and relaxed as if they were just watching TV.
"Hi." I greeted them. I gave them a little wave, so the demons knew I was friendly.
"Hey, Marrrrrrco." Jordan came up and stood way too close to me. I glanced at Rachel and she rolled her eyes. I saw the smile creeping up on her face though. I'd remember that next time I decided to pity her for something.
"Where's Erek?"
Sara skipped over to the closet and pulled it open. Erek sat in there, short hair in bunched ponytails tied by rainbow and butterfly clips. He had lipstick on his lips, teeth, and chin. Mascara practically dripped off his eyes. His hands were tied behind the chair. His face had the expression of utter horror. I guess even an ancient alien android with a hologram and force field couldn't stand a makeover from two little girls.
"Erek! Sorry. . ." Rachel walked over to untie him. She whispered in his ear "Just break the ropes, we're in a rush. Thanks, by the way."
Erek nodded and discreetly pulled his wrists apart. He could have easily escaped the wrath of Jordan and Sara, but he had to play his part. Then he pulled the stuff out of his hair and waved.
"No need to pay me, I, uh, I gotta go." He shot out the door at super-human android speed.
"He runs fast." Jordan commented.
"Probably so no one from his school would see him lookin like a reject clown from the Circus of Uglies." I laughed.
"AH-HAHAH! That is soo funny Marco!" Jordan practically drooled on me. I stared at her, then at Rachel.
"Yeah, yeah. Listen, guys we have to go home NOW." Rachel tugged on her sister's arms.
"We don't have to clean up?" Sara asked, pointing at the mess.
"What is that?" I asked, indicating the yellowish-white stuff.
"Kraft Mac n Cheese."
"Cheezy!" Sara declared. "Come get your noodle-roni!"
"It's 'Kraft gets your noodle going', stupid." Jordan sneered.
I blinked. "Oh. Um, yeah, let's go."
Rachel picked Sara up and carried her out the door. Which left me with Jordan. She clenched my hand in a Superman grip and marched proudly out the door, dragging me behind her.
Outside Rachel looked at me. "Okay, guys, we have to go fast. Run, even."
"Oh, I thought you wanted me to go home." I said sarcastically. She glared at me. I cringed. "Just kidding. I don't feel like going home. Tee-hee."
Jordan pulled me closer. Then she turned to Rachel. "How come we came here anyway?"
"Oh, um, I had some stuff with school. With Cassie. A project." Rachel explained.
"Why'd you leave?"
"It was at school." Rachel's eyes started to blink rapidly. Great. Xena was a bad liar.
"So where's Cassie?"
"I - uh, she's still there."
"At the school?"
"Yeah."
"On a Friday night?"
I shook my head and shot her a look that said "You suck at lying." She shot me back a look that said "Screw you."
Jordan grinned at her sweetly. "I'm telling mo-om!"
Rachel thought for a moment. Then she put Sara down, came over, and bent close to Jordan.
"I'll give you ten bucks."
"Twenty."
"Deal."
She picked Sara up again. "Seriously guys, we have to run."
"I want money too!" Sara wailed.
"Right, okay, when we get home!"
Rachel dashed down the sidewalk, with Jordan following her and dragging me along. A couple minutes later I was out of breath and nearing their driveway. Just as we saw some headlights slowing to a stop.
"Round the back!" Rachel hissed. We dodged the headlights, which were creeping toward us like a pair of spotlights. She led us to her backyard, which was lined with a wooden fence. A tall wooden fence with a gate. With the latch on the other side. There were no footholds or anything to climb over.
"Jeez, what now? I asked. Rachel rolled her eyes at me.
"Come on Sara, you know what to do." She lifted her youngest sister up and Sara hoisted herself up over the fence. Judging from the noiselessness on the other side, I guess she had a soft landing. My mouth dropped open.
"She's gonna unlock the gate?" I asked.
"No, she's too little. The latch is rusty and she can't pull hard enough."
"So what is she - "
Before I finished, a dirty shoelace was thrown over the fence and landed on my face. Rachel grabbed it and tugged. I heard a click, and the gate opened.
"You've done this before?" I gaped.
"You bet." Rachel snatched up Sara again and sprinted across the patio to the back door. Locked.
"Let me guess, no key." I said. "Don't tell me one of you is going to smash the door in with a toothpick or something."
"Jordan?" Rachel turned to her other sister
Jordan pulled a long wire from under the patio stairs. One of those wires that people use to keep their long plants from bending too much. She bent it into a weird shape, stuck it under the door and fiddled around.
"Hurry! I hear them!" Rachel hissed.
Jordan looked annoyed, but soon I heard a soft click and Rachel slammed the door open.
"How did she - ?" Before I could ask how the HELL that was possible, Rachel grabbed everyone, threw us into her kitchen, and slammed the door shut. She stuck Jordan and Sara at the table, pulled a Monopoly game board out from underneath, and shoved me next to Jordan. All in about two seconds.
The front door opened.
"Rachel?"
"Yes, mom?" Rachel answered, sounding completely normal. Not even out of breath. Every hair in place. She wasn't even red and hyperventilating, like I was. Jordan and Sara were setting up the Monopoly board. Jordan was struggling to keep from smirking.
Naomi walked in, followed by my dad. They both had dried bird gunk all over them.
"Marco?"
"Hi dad!" I said breathlessly. "Did you know Naomi's daughter is a friend of mine from school? Rachel!"
My dad looked puzzled for a minute, then looked at Rachel. "Hi."
"Hello!" Rachel said over-enthusiastically. She was probably giddy over the rush of having just beaten our parents home.
"Hi Marco. So how are my girls?" Naomi asked, setting down her purse.
"Great!" they chirped.
"Mommy, why are you covered in bird poo poo?" Sara asked.
"I don't really know Sara." Naomi looked at my Dad and they laughed. I made a face. Rachel made a similar face.
"Well, I'm going to go wash up. Since everyone is here why don't we just order a pizza? Jeremy, you can use that bathroom." Naomi guided my Dad away.
Silence. Rachel sat next to Sara and tapped her nails on the table. Tap. Tap. Tap.
Sara and Jordan were actually engaging in a game of Monopoly, like they'd been doing it for hours.
I just sat there still in shock, wondering how it was humanly possible that Rachel trained a 5 year old and an 11 year old to pick locks. And how this family of crazies could run a mile without breaking a sweat. And how we were NOT caught.
"So, I guess you guys do stuff like this a lot." I said, breaking the silence. Rachel just shot me a puzzled expression.
"Do what a lot?" Jordan asked.
"Um, nothing never mind."
Rachel got up. A couple minutes later she returned. She calmly handed 20 bucks to Jordan and a five to Sara.
"Glad to be of service." Jordan smiled. Sara happily stuffed the Lincoln in her pocket, clearly not noticing that she was ripped off by 15 bucks.
"So what do you guys want on your pizza?" Rachel asked, pulling out a phone.
"What does Marrrrco want?" Jordan purred next to me. I edged away.
"Well, I like mushrooms."
"Ewww! I hate mushrooms!" Sara cried.
"Shh, Sara. Marco's the guest. We'll get mushrooms." Rachel said in a freakishly un-Rachel kind tone. Sara sulked but forgot all about it after reached a Community Chest Square.
I stared at Rachel. Why was she being nice to me all of a sudden?
She caught my eyes. "Hey what are you staring at, Dorkus?"
I sighed and threw up my hands.
"Oh I give up. This has GOT to be a girl thing!"
- - - Well there ya go. **cheers and tries to do a split but ends up splitting pants and breaking that pelvis bone thing** You know, its starting to occur to me that I've been updating every Sunday. So I guess that will be my official update day. I will update every Sunday. How does that sound? Mostly because I get dragged out of bed early for church anyway, and while my family takes 30 minutes to get ready I'm ready in about 5 (no I ain't grimy and no I don't smell like a turd), so I just go online and screw around. So yeah. Cool. . .
THE HAPPY KORNER!! (SQUEEEEEEEE!!)
Jinako-chan - **sigh** I hate school. Hehe. Yeah, I felt sorry for Ax too, so I'm writing a short story for him on Halloween. He should enjoy that. Cause he isn't speaking to me right now, I hope this will win him back. And by golly, you're right. Why can't Jake and Cassie just kiss regular? It's nutty, I tell ya! Oh, now I haven't really confirmed that theres gonna be R/M, now did I? Hee hee. Aw, heck. Y'all read me like a book. Ain't no surprising any of you. Or so you think. . .**wink**
Senydegger - o.0 I KNEW those theater rooms were suspicious!! And uh. . .about your unbald butt thing…8-|
BlackOpal - I always wanted to clone something! I remember when I was 5 I took my cousin's hair and planted it in the backyard. I was so depressed cuz I couldn't grow myself a brother. . .And yeah Jake kissing Cassie came to me in a dream one night. . .actually no it didn't I saw it on 7th Heaven **blushes** but believe me I DO NOT usually watch that show. . .
Freak show - Oh I'm sure Jake and Cassie loved it too. They sent me a thank you card after I posted the chapter. And they promised to name their first baby after me. That's right Baby Freak Apple. W00t w00t!! You know what you do when people stare at you? Stare right back at them til they get all uncomfortable and turn away blushing. I love doing that.
EsotericEric - Alrighty then, I will be waiting for my nickel in the mail, hehehe. Aw, you're makin me blush, Eric! **blushes** About your beef, I tried to make it harder, but it just worked out that way. But trust me, you want difficult I'll give you difficult! Oh and don't eat beef, it's bad for you.
Mistresso of madness - **watch the smart meter above my head get lower** LoL, just kidding. I don't know why, but you had my rolling on the floor with "oh my cheese!" LMAO!! Oh and LoL it serves you right for reading my junk at work! Get back to work! Muahahah! P.S. Your voice scares me.
*ROGUE* - Well if it goes as well as THE ISLAND did, I probably will have 200. But of course that does not matter to me **lies through her teeth and jumps for joy** Your welcome for the Jake-Cassieness. It was my pleasure. And of course, Jake and Cassie's. . .
DH - Yeah, a lot of people liked the kiss. Hee hee, I turned red when I wrote it, but that's ok no one was around. L my summer break is over. . .Quack quack!
A.S. Amalon - Insanity is my middle name! Actually, no its not but I despise my middle name so when I turn 18 I'm officially changing it to Insanity! Hehe, but actually I don't think they're THAT insane. . .but maybe that's cuz I'm just used to myself. . .
Phillip (Triple Point) - Rubber chickens. Heh. Hehehehehe. Oh and I had no idea I was doing that Tobias and Ax, truthfully **blushes** I was just flying by the seat of my pants. But now that you mention it, I like it and I will definitely build on that! Oh, and uh, I plan on doing some things in this story to Tobias that will make him fulfill his role n the Animorph series that K.A. Applegate never actually did **grumbles** Or at least I'll try my very very best!
Super Hurricane - Ah, you're getting pretty warm there SH **wink**. As for Tobias, I think he just meant in a sarcastic way that he was surprised. Sarcastically. You know? Ah, I don't know what I'm talking about, hehe.
DawnOfEast - Hee, yeah, I liked writing that. More has arrived, buddy.
Chelz-Aelle - Snogging Harry again, are we? Hmph **mubles about traitors abandoning the Animorphs for Harry Potter** Hehehe.
Moon*wolf2 - The line didn't show up in the review, but glad you liked it anyway!
Oedipal Kat - You know you're the only one who commented on my attractive rumpular area? (pssst, you're my favorite) LoL. Yeah there's always gonna be more chapters. At least until I get a life or something. . .