Author: theshinykitty
Warning: Shounen-Ai, Cursing, And no long Japanese phrases that most non-Japanese people would not understand.
Disclaimer: Naruto ain't mine
!!OKAY!! Lets pretend, for the last chapter, I said it was DINNERTIME, not lunchtime!! (Argh... I seriously got to start planning these stories out beforehand...)!!
…Wow… No one even pointed out the plot holes in the last chapter… w00t.
::falling in love is a like a spiral; you keep going in circles, but with each moment, you fall closer toward the center, and each other::
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uzumaki/spiral
Ch4: This is Where I Live, Now Get the Hell Out.
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Naruto POV-Just to recap:
-I called Sasuke gay, he heard me.
-He got ready to beat me within an inch of my life, when a fat kid fell on him.
-Sasuke fainted.
-Took him to his dorm.
-I am now laying on top of him, and we are... kissing...
-Sasuke has just revived.
-I am fucked three ways 'till Thursday.
Deep breath...
AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!!!one!!!11!!!1!!!1!!!!!seventy-two!1!11!!!1!!1!!11!11!11!!!!!
HolycrapholycrapholycrapholycrapholycrapholycrapholycrapHOLYFREAKIN'CRAP...
-DIE-
I mean,
-FAINT-
...I mean,
-BLACK OUT-
(Black out sounds manlier...)
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Sasuke POV-Man, that was embarrassing...
I got knocked out by Jiroubou... JIROUBOU!!
Hm... There seems to be some sort of pressure on my lips, and something heavy is laying on me... It can't still be Jiroubou, or I would be dead by now...
Better open my eyes...
......GAH!!
Uzumaki. Was. Lying. On top of. Me!! And he's apparently out cold.
Well, Okay, calm down... I'm sure nothing of that nature happened. I still have plausible deniability on everything. Keep cool. You are a genius. You are pretty. You ARE the best. YOU CAN GET THROUGH THIS. (FEEL THE POW-WAH!)
Wait...
...Is that his lips on... mine...?
..................ARGH!! What have I done to deserve this injustice?! I swear, all those killings... I was FRAMED!!
After about five minutes of freaking out, I finally push him none-too-gently off me.
And, he lands right on my cat.
ARGH!! I can't take it anymore!! Just get it over with, God!! Just smite me already!!
I finally stop ranting at God for a moment, and collect my wits.
Well, let's see the severity of damage to my now my charred, burning life, self-respect, and all those other good things;
-Got knocked out by fat kid: -30HP
-My kitty is on the verge of being a pancake: -20HP
-Naruto kissed me: -92384928401964928635982695862349865.001HP
And, is that cat pee I smell?
Anyways... First step; get Naruto OFF my cat, and OUT of my door.
I kick him.
...Damn. I was kinda just expecting him to just... not... be here... after I kicked him. I mean, that's what usually happens. But then again, I seem to remember a lot more... fan girls around carting the person away that I kicked... Hm... Learn something new every day.
Well, I must have done something right, because he's moving a little, and then rolls off my cat.
Thankfully, Ko-chan is alive and... licking itself... in places...
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Naruto POV-So, I'm just walking along in my kitchen, and all-of-a-sudden, this lady pops out from behind the counter! She throws some unlit matches at me, and I die.
But then, five minutes later, I think, 'Hey... This doesn't feel like dying! What a jip!' And I revive myself to go to have some dinner, but then, some bastard decides to kick me in the side! I roll off of something small and furry, and open my eyes slowly.
OH RIGHT... I'm in Sasuke's dorm! Not a kitchen!
Ha Ha... What a crazy dream...
I sit there, chuckling like a knave for a few seconds, and I feel some weird sensation crawling it's way up my spine. No, it wasn't a caterpillar; not this time at least.
I turn around and see the evil, glaring eyes of one Uchiha Sasuke, ready to take each appendage of mine and stuff it down the garbage disposal in the sink, slowly, with a happy grin on his face.
And trust me, happy Uchiha is even WORSE than 'I'm brooding, leave me alone or I'll stab you in the heart with a broken pencil' Uchiha.
Oh yeah, getting back to the end of my life.
"EXPLAIN." He said in that, 'You had better move all writing utensils out of my reach, because I'm about ready to kill you' tone.
Deep breath…
"Er... Well.. See.. Okay, this kid fell on you and you blacked out and so I took you to the nurses office and she said that you were fine and she couldn't keep you there because somebody poisoned a lot of other students by mixing some crazy crap together and then so I took you up here and then a cat touched me and I freaked out and jumped on top of you and we were kissing and I guess I was so shocked that I fain- blacked out." (AN: …GAH! I want to go back and fix all the grammatical mistakes in this paragraph… but he's supposed to be talking fast… IT BURNS MY EYES!!)
Someone needs to invent breathe/talking, or at least get me a paper bag, because I think I just hyperventilated my self to death.
...Wait, what…?
He glared at me.
Damn, I should have lied and said I really was... Sakura... in disguise. A really crappy disguise…
And just then, I heard the door lock shut. From the outside.
...Oh, crap... Oh crappity crap crap.
LOCKDOWN.
It's mandatory; if you're not in your dorm by 9:00pm, then you're screwed. And if you're in someone ELSE'S dorm, then I guessed your screwed too. (That kind of defeats the purpose of lockdown in the first place doesn't it...?)
Oh well, the point is, I was stuck in Sasuke-bastard's room ALL FUCKING NIGHT.
With his creepiness, and the non-objection to murdering, and the millions of pointy sharp things he could kill me with... and the millions of non-pointy things he could also kill me with…
God, I fucking hate fan-service.
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Fan-service!! YAY!! Sorry it's so short, will make next chapter longer; promise.
THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO REVIEWED!! I WAS HAPPY SO MUCH THAT I CRIED!! CRIED LIKE WHEN BUTTERFREE LEFT ASH ON POKEMON!! BUT HAPPY TEARS!! NOT SAD ONES!!
Okay, this caps-lock is hurting my eyes now.
But seriously, Thanks to all the reviewers!! EspeciallyHieisbestbuddy888, who writes such long pretty reviews! (Er… and no thank you… I… might have to punch you…)
Oh yeah, and to Zizi, Yeah, I know, I threw in my fair share of cheap jokes… but in all honesty, it's how I thought that Naruto and Sasuke would really react. YAY!!
I need sleep…
Read? Review?