Part 19

I couldn't think of anything to do.

When I came to this realization, it was very depressing for me. I had hoped to come up with a good solution to reunite Yuki, Kyo, and Tohru. But anything I thought of either wasn't a permanent idea or wasn't possible to follow through with.

And, I had no idea was Isuzu was up to, since she had taken refuge in Haru's house. Amazingly, Akito still didn't know that she was back.

All my thinking time was done in my house. I mostly sat in my room, watching the tiny snowflakes fall as the air grew colder. I hated being so lazy, but while I was in that condition there wasn't much I could do anyways.

Whenever Hatori came to see me, I asked him how Yuki and Kyo were doing. We were on better speaking terms than he had been before, but I had a feeling that he wasn't even speaking to Isuzu.

"How're Yun-chan and Kyo-kun doing?" I asked earnestly one day.

Hatori sighed. "Yuki has become very sullen lately. He hasn't say a word to me and Akito says he hasn't been talking much…I have a feeling he's turning out like Kisa."

I gasped loudly. When Kisa had become depressed because of her classmates, she stopped talking entirely. Was Yuki shutting out his voice because he couldn't be near Tohru?

"Akito's rather angry about it, but also pleased," said Hatori. "He figures that Yuki's finally submitted to him."

I shuddered slightly. "Poor Yun-chan."

"Kyo's not much different. Well, he does speak but not often. I've noticed that he has your scarf."

I turned red. "I—"

"He also told me to thank you. He somehow had in his possession a helping of food that wasn't his usual dinner."

I shook my head. There was no use hiding anything. "I gave him my scarf. And one night I left him some leftovers of my dinner. The food in general is comfort food and he needed the comfort."

Hatori patted me on the shoulder. "I understand, Kagura; there's no need to justify yourself to me. But please don't go near that house. Akito's moods have worsened as of late. I don't know what he might do to you or anyone that goes near that house."

I nodded slightly and stared out at the falling snow. "Isn't there anything that can be done? At the current point…this situation will drive everyone crazy!"

Hatori stood up. "That may be, but the situation before sent Akito into a frenzy. As head of the family, his needs come first."

"Yeah, but—"

"I might not like it too much, but he's my patient like you are. I have to look out for him like I look out for you."

I sighed dejectedly, continuing to stare outside. I didn't like being put in the same category as Akito, but there was no helping the fact that we were both sick. Even though I don't have the strength to viciously attack people and stomp them into the group.

Hatori put a hand on my head. "Have faith, Kagura. I know things look bleak now, but good things are bound to happen."

"I know. But I want those good things to happen sooner rather than later."

My days were long and slow. And never ending to boot.

Word had gotten around the Juunishi about the little escapade at Shigure's house and members started visiting me. They ignored Akito's threat that people were forbidden form seeing me and said hello and brought me gifts. Probably my most bizarre visit was when Ritsu came over.

"I-I-I-I brought some roses," he greeted, giving me a bouquet of yellow roses.

"Thank you," I said warmly. Then I accidentally pricked my finger on a thorn. "Ow!"

It was at this point Ritsu started freaking out.

"Oh my god!! I can't believe this happened!! Ah, I'm such a failure!!!! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry—"

Shigure poked him in the side, causing him to collapse on the floor.

"Oh, I didn't know you were here!" I greeted, embarrassed. I suddenly remembered the dilemma we put him through with Tohru.

Shigure laughed and waved a hand. "I like making extravagant entrances!! It's been so boring up at my house that I needed to pay you guys a visit!! I'm sure Akito would understand if I told him."

Ritsu whimpered on the floor. "I'm sorry. I was in such a good mood before this, especially since I saw Tohru…"

I fell to my knees next to him. "Ritsu, are you serious?! You really saw Tohru?!"

"Yes!! I was buying the roses and I saw her walk by!! She looked at me for a few seconds before continuing on her way."

Excitement filled my heart. "Really?! Did you talk to her before that?"

"No. I haven't spoken to her in a long time. When I saw her today I wanted to say hello to her, but then I remembered that she didn't have her memories."

Shigure looked thoughtful. "Does this mean she's gaining her memory back?"

I grabbed Ritsu by his collar and pulled him up. "What did her expression look like?"

"…Um, confused. And it looked like she was in deep thought."

I pulled him closer and planted a kiss on his mouth. Then I let him go and stood up."

"This is great!!" I declared excitedly. "I have to consult Isuzu!!"

As I ran out the door, I heard Shigure and Ritsu comment about me.

"Now, now Kagura-chan!! Don't be cheating on Kyo-kun!!"

"I…I…"

Unfortunately, Isuzu wasn't as hyperactive as I was about the whole situation.

"So?" she said plainly, flipping through a catalogue. "She's regaining some of her memories."

"What do you think we should do about it?" I asked.

"Nothing."

"What?!"

"Like I said; nothing. There's no use kidnapping her again as trying to force her forgotten memories on her didn't work. We're going to wait on her to seek out her forgotten memories."

I gulped, feeling disappointed that there was no other option for us. "So…we wait for her to come see us? That might take a long time."

Well, if we kidnap her she might intentionally suppress her forgotten memories, so we don't have much of a choice."

"Yes, you're right."

It's never easy to wait for what you seek to happen, is it?

It was torture, waiting for Tohru to show her face at some point. It was a long shot that she might come to the Sohma compound, and as the days dragged on and got colder, my hope was thinning.

Of that time, I only saw Yuki once. He looked like he was the walking dead. No doubt he had been waiting for what I was waiting for and had given up hope. It was painful to see him at that window, staring up at the sky with a mournful expression. That day I took the risk and went over to speak with him.

"Yun-chan," I said softly, reaching out and touching his warm hand. "Please hang in there. Tohru is sure to come."

Yuki looked at me with an expression that resembled a lost puppy. Or rat, for that matter. He looked as if he wanted to speak to me, but he said nothing. It was as Hatori had feared; he'd locked away his words. And though his eyes looked so sad, he wasn't crying; it seemed like he locked that away too.

He took hold of the hand which held his and turned it over so my palm was facing up. Slowly he drew out words.

"Please…hope…gone…help…" I said aloud. Tears stung my eyes when I said those words. "Oh Yun-chan…"

"Yuki!!" came Akito's call.

Yuki sighed sadly, gave me a quick nod, and left the window and disappeared into the darkness of the house.

I clenched both of my fists tightly with rage. Damn you, Akito!!!! Damn you to the bowls of hell!!!!

I found myself wandering around after that. Even with the chilled winds and the puffs of snow, I felt comfortable outside. I needed the distraction to keep me from breaking down all together.

That's when I found myself back in front of the house holding Kyo. And that only worked to worsen my mood.

Tears fell from my eyes as I took a seat in front of that house. I leaned my head against the wall, sighing as fresh tears sliding down my face.

"Kyo-kun…Yun-chan…" I murmured, shaking from the cold and from my sobs.

The misery of the compound seemed to stretch on forever. Until one day, nearly two months after we kidnapped Tohru, things changed.

"I'm going now, Kagura," said Mom as she bundled up. "I'm not going to be back for a while, okay? Watch out for yourself."

I put aside the book I had been reading. "Okay, Mom."

"Good. Bye."

Once she left, instead of turning back to my book I walked over to the window and saw more snow falling. Not too heavily, but it was a nice comfortable wave coming down. No spot on the ground was spared from the snow.

I don't know if it was fate, but I felt compelled to walk around outside. Feeling bored as it was, I went to get ready. I was wearing a simple kimono and despite the snowfall it wasn't as cold as it had been. So I grabbed a warm blanket and wrapped it about myself. Then, after slipping into a pair of sandals, I ventured outside.

It was even more beautiful to be outside than watch the snowfall from my window. It was silly to be wandering around in my getup while the weather was like this, but I didn't mind.

"Hi Kagura!!" called Momiji, waving happily. He and Hiro were throwing snowballs at each other. Kisa was standing off to the side, smiling a little.

"Any of you hear from Akito?" I asked cautiously, glancing towards the main house.

"Haa-san said he had another high fever and was asleep," said Hiro. "Don't worry about too much, Haa-san gave him a strong drug and he'll be asleep for a while. But don't stay out too long."

"I won't," I promised.

Hiro nodded, but his attention was diverted when Momiji threw a snowball and it hit him square in the head. With an angry yell he chased after Momiji.

I laughed a little. It was then that I felt compelled to leave the compound for a little bit. Akito had another high fever, so he wouldn't go another rampage.

I just want to see what the snowfall looks like outside, I thought to myself, moving towards the main gate. I won't be too long.

My departure wasn't really noticed since Hiro and Momiji were too busy stuffing snow into each other's shirts. Once I was outside, I leaned against the closed doors and closed my eyes. I inhaled the fresh smell of snow and looked up towards the sky.

I heard footsteps close by. I quickly turned my head, wondering who would be near our house in such weather.

Tohru stood there, looking a little nervous.

My heart jumped into my throat. I had been waiting for this moment, but I didn't expect it to come when my guard was down.

"Um…I…" said Tohru, eyeing me nervously. Obviously she was keeping the kidnapping fresh in her mind. "I…uh…never mind."

She quickly turned and started away. I gather a strength from deep within me and ran after her. Just as she was starting away I lunged, grabbing her behind, pinning her arms to her sides. She immediately struggled against me.

"Tohru, don't run!!" I cried, hanging on tightly but carefully to avoid hurting myself. "You came here for a reason, didn't you? Some of your memories came back, didn't they?"

She continued to struggle, but not as furiously as one might if they were being held against their will. That was further proof for me; she remembered my condition.

"You don't have to run!! You're safe with us!! Please, stop!!"

Finally, she stopped struggling and sank to her knees. I held a firm hold on her just in case she decided to bolt. This forced me to my knees too.

"I'm so confused," said Tohru, her voice breaking. "I didn't remember anything when you showed me those pictures. But then…this snow…yuki…"

I sighed softly. Yuki. Snow. Her memories started resurfacing because of the snow, or 'yuki'."

But how much did she remember?

She was trembling; I knew she was crying. "I want to know everything, Kagura-chan. Why were my memories taken from me in the first place? The warmth I felt with all of you in the memories I saw…I haven't felt that way since Mom was still alive. Did I do something bad? Did I hurt someone? What did I do that was so bad that my memories were erased?"

I changed my hold on her to make it seem more like a comforting hug. "It wasn't your fault, Tohru. None of it was. You did nothing wrong."

Because of my loosened hold, she was able to pull from me. We both stood up and she turned to me. Though tears were still spilling down her face, she wore a determined expression.

"I want to see them," she said. "Take me to see everyone. All the Juunishi. And Yuki-kun. And…Kyo-kun."

I felt uncomfortable about her statement. I had been afraid she was growing to like Kyo over Yuki. But I didn't want that. Yuki needed her strength and her love.

Besides, Kyo was my boyfriend and considering how long it took me to get him; I didn't wan to give him up.

But, I didn't let my feelings show as I took her head. "Come with me, Tohru."

I led her into the gates of the compound. I thanked my lucky stars that Akito was indisposed at the moment. If he saw Tohru on the family grounds of all places…

"Tohru?!" Momiji cried, but then quickly silenced himself when I hushed him. But I couldn't stop him from jumping onto her and giving her a big hug.

POOF!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Luckily, Tohru didn't scream this time. She actually laughed and gave Momiji a small hug. She even accepted Kisa's hug. Hiro just kind of stood there, looking pleased.

"Let's find Yun-chan and Kyo-kun," I said, still afraid Akito might wake up.

"Has she recovered her memories?" asked a voice. I turned to see Isuzu and Haru joining the fray. Tohru edged away from Isuzu, probably still thinking about the kidnapping.

"A little," I responded. "She wants to see Yun-chan and Kyo-kun."

"Yell for them then," said Haru calmly. "They'll come if they hear you."

"But Akito—" I began.

"Just do it. He wouldn't dare stand up to all of us in his condition."

I was silent as I contemplated this. I didn't want anyone getting hurt. But seeing Tohru would surely help Yuki and Kyo…

"All right," I said. "Call for them. One at a time, though."

Tohru nodded and went to stand in the middle of the main area. I had a feeling of who she would call first, but I really wanted it to be Yuki.

"Kyooooooooo-kun!!!!!" she shrieked loudly, her voice echoing all over the compound.

We wait for several long moments. Silence greeted us. I gave a nod to Tohru, who readied herself to scream again.

Suddenly, there was a bit of rumbling and then a loud explosion from somewhere inside the camp. More rumbling followed it as loud footsteps grew closer and closer. I knew what had happened, so I wasn't surprised at what happened next.

There was a 'whoosh' of air and Kyo in his 3rd form made his presence known. He had jumped into the air, scaled one of the houses, and landed firmly on his feet nearby.

I wasn't afraid of him in this form. But I looked from Tohru to Kyo while gripping the sides of my blanket. I prayed that she would remember how she had saved him. How she had shown her acceptance of him while he was in his true form…

Kyo seemed shocked to see Tohru. Tohru stared back at him with a blank expression. Then he closed her eyes and stood still for what seemed like a long time. Then she opened her eyes and approached Kyo.

Kyo drew back a little as she came closer, but made no real attempt to run from her. She stood in front of him and reached out a hand to him.

"Kyo-kun," she said softly, touching his rough face with a gloved hand. "Oh, I'm so glad to see you. I'm glad to have started recovering my memories. It hurts to know I was made to forget someone like you."

I could tell Kyo was starting to get emotional, even as he transformed back. Tears were coming down his face as he stared at Tohru with a sad expression.

"I-I-I thought I would never see you again," he choked. Tears were coming from Tohru's eyes as she moved to hold him in a light embrace, not too tightly so he wouldn't transform.

Much to my own guilt, I felt jealous of the scene in front of me. I knew very well that Tohru would always have a place in Kyo's heart. I always had a sinking fear that if Tohru turned around and had a sudden realization that she loved Kyo the most; that he would go with her. I hated myself for feeling like that, but I had already lost Kyo once because of how he felt for her.

After a few minutes, Kyo gently pushed her away. "Thank you Tohru. But…I'm sure that there's someone who you want to see more than me."

Tohru looked confused, confirming my dread that she had not remembered her feelings for Yuki. I was very glad Yuki was not there…

"That damn Rat Yuki is waiting for you," he said, looking annoyed that he was helping Yuki. "That poor idiot has stopped talking because of all this."

Something snapped in Tohru's face. She let out a soft groan and fell forward. Kyo caught her before she hit the ground.

POOF!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tohru immediately recovered herself, looking embarrassed. "I'm sorry, Kyo-kun."

"Don't be," said Kyo, now the Cat. "Just go find Yuki."

Tohru nodded slowly and stood up. She came back over to me, looking confused. "I'm sorry, Kagura-chan."

"It's fine," I said, feeling relieved. Her display before probably gave her more memories. Whatever she felt for Kyo might've ruined some things, which is probably why she apologized.

"Where can I find Yuki-kun?" she asked, almost sound anxious.

"You don't have to look far," said Momiji, who had changed back without us noticing. "He's already here."

We all turned. Yuki was leaning against Akito's house, dressed in a similar fashion I was. He was staring at Tohru as if he couldn't believe his eyes. We could all tell he had been standing there for a long time, but because he didn't talk he had remained silent.

Tohru started towards him, and I took the opportunity to go over to Kyo, who had just transformed back. He quickly yanked on his clothes and I stood over him as we all watched Tohru stop in front of Yuki.

"Yuki-kun," she said softly. "I'm sorry. I wasn't able to keep the promise. Even after my memories were erased, I didn't remember our relationship. And…I was about to make a mistake. Please, forgive me."

Yuki stared at her, not knowing how to act.

Tohru pulled off her gloves and held out her bare hands to him. "I'm here now. I don't remember everything, but I know that we loved each other. I'm sure you can help me remember everything."

Yuki remained silent, but I could tell he was on the verge of crying.

"Don't you have anything to say?" Tohru asked sincerely, though she seemed to be getting emotional again. "I'm back. The more I look at you, the more this warm feeling spreads through me. I know you've suffered all this time. Let me help you. Please?"

Yuki stared at her hands. Finally, he reached out and took them. He choked out a sob and the tears he had no doubt been holding all this time spilled out. He gripped her hands, kissing her knuckles and choking out small sobs.

"…T…Tohru-san," he forced out, finally finding his voice. It was the first time he called Tohru anything but 'Honda-san'. "Tohru-san…"

Tohru was crying again, but she wore a happy smile. She leaned against Yuki, both of them crying tears of joy.

I smiled broadly. "This is what I'd been waiting for."

Kyo snorted. "I'm glad to be out of that fucking prison. I had been planning on doing that, but I couldn't figure out the right time to do it. When I heard Tohru…I knew my time had come."

I removed the blanket I had wrapped around myself and put it around Kyo's bare shoulders. I knelt down and embraced him behind. "Before she obtained all her memories I think she liked you."

Kyo sighed. "If it had been a year ago and she confessed to me, I would've jumped on the chance; even if her memories had been erased. But now…the things I heard about Yuki, how he just gave up on everything in life…I guess it made me realized how much he loved her. Taking advantage of Tohru when she's this vulnerable is cowardly, especially when her true love is Yuki. Even if we hooked up it would've only been a matter of time that she would remember Yuki, as she had remember everything else. Besides…" he reached up and took hold of my arms. "I already have someone to love, so there's no need to chase after her."

I kissed his temple. "Thanks, Kyo-kun."

"Well now, what have we here?!"

We all jerked when we heard that voice. All of us looked up with horror as we saw the figure towering close to Yuki and Tohru.

"What the fuck is this?!" yelled Akito, his face contorted in rage.