Author's Note: To anyone still reading, thanks for reading and reviewing.

Disclaimer: No, I don't own it! Stop asking! (clutches head)

Chapter Nine: Lie to Save Yourself

"Whose bright idea was it to give us fake passes and then play along, only to throw us out because our kids were 'too rowdy'?! Listen, bitch, just because your kids didn't force the lock on the doorway and try to break the movie projector doesn't mean they're not capable of it," Vicky thunders, flinging her pocketbook at Tootie. It catches her in the stomach and the wind is knocked out of her.

"Just a sign of what we can do together," Ricky lies, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. She leans into him and, in front of their kids, running around like a bunch of maniacs; she proceeds to make out with him. If Tootie weren't recovering from the twenty pound purse hurled at her stomach, she'd be busy projectile vomiting.

Before she knows it, Vicky and Ricky are doing a lot more than just making out and she has to usher their cretins out of the room and up the stairs before she really does vomit. Just the idea of anyone finding her sister remotely sexually attractive…blech, it doesn't bear thought, only lost lunches.

Fortunately, she manages to rush them into her old room and lock the room. Thereupon, she, exhausted with the effort of forcing three ADD riddled brats up the stairs and keeping them from peeking at their parents, collapses onto the floor. She doesn't need any kids scarred for life on her account.

Good Lord, was this really her room? There are only a few remnants of her shrine left, most desecrated in ways she could not say in polite company. They've ruined the upholstery, the bed, and the walls are splattered with what appears to be human excrement. She takes back what she said about them being maniacs- they're clearly savages.

And she isn't going to just call it 'the terrible twos' and leave it at that. The triplets surpass anything that a normal two year old would ever dream of and more. With no sturdy parentage and no respect, they've become little monsters. Now, unfortunately, she's stuck in the room with them until Vicky and Ricky finish, however long that takes.

Watching them bang on the walls with a baseball bat detachedly, she wonders how her life could have gotten so bad. Sure, there was always Vicky, but she hadn't always been like this. Something had to have made her snap, start resenting her baby sister worst than ever. She just wishes she knew what it was…

Suddenly, one of them, a boy with a long red mane, starts snickering. His brother and sister join in and she realizes she must have done something inadvertently that they find amusing. Horror sets in- whatever she did, it must have been fairly large because one of them has fallen over in mirth.

"That's our special place!" Mickey, the eldest, exclaims. Mimi, the only girl, giggles and clings to him. Okay…what's going on here?

"It's our pee-pee paradise!" Mattie croons, joining his siblings. He's the youngest, naturally, and the brattiest. She longs to wrap her hands around his neck, but right now, the mortification of what happened settles down hard on her. Grand, so she is the butt of a cosmic joke, wonderful.

Shuddering, Tootie rises and doesn't even bother to wipe off her skirt. Gross, she can feel it soak her underwear. How is she supposed to change and keep them from seeing their parents having sex?

"Wanda…" Tootie whispers unconsciously. On cue, a pink mirror appears on her former closet and she stumbles towards it, ignoring her niece and nephews. Without being told, she understands this is Wanda's color and thus, her honorary godmother has arrived.

Before she even opens her mouth, Wanda nods sadly. Her eyes fall upon the cretins, dancing and congratulating themselves on tricking Tootie, and she frowns. Poor kid.

"No need to say anything, sweetie…we fairies can tell things through our wands-" Wanda began but a loud scream made her halt. Tootie shuddered again and wished she no longer had ears. At least if she didn't, she wouldn't be able to hear what she thought she was hearing.

Grinning widely, the three joined in, positively howling. She holds her hands over her ears and indicated she wished she were deaf. Wanda had to yell over the din that she couldn't grant that, only irrevocable wishes were permitted and she was bound to wish she could hear again soon.

"What's the point of hearing if Timmy doesn't listen to me?!" Tootie screams…in the silence. Her face turns crimson- everyone can hear her. It's just one delight after another, wasn't it?

"Maybe, just maybe," Vicky says cruelly, "it's because he's not fucking interested in you! You're just a pathetic little slave pining away."

"And no one will ever find you attractive!" Ricky chimes in. "Because you're an ugly bitch!"

Tears spring in her eyes and she leans against the closet wall for solace. Wanda, glancing around, turns into a small child with pink hair and hugs her tightly. She indicates Tootie lift her so she can whisper in her ear and not be overheard.

While the couple continues and she blocks them out, Wanda hugs her and begins to murmur comfort. Badly shaken by the insults, the teenager sinks to the floor again, devoid of any human expository matter. (Wanda has cleaned up her skirt and underpants, thankfully.)

"Sport, they're just trying to tear you down. You can't let them get to you," she whispers, looking her in the eye. Tootie turns her head away.

"You're very attractive and any boy that doesn't see that is out of their head…" With lust…damn Timmy.

Shakily, she laughs humorlessly. As consoling as she knows she's trying to be, she simply doesn't believe her. If all those boys really found her so attractive, why haven't any of them asked her out? Just because she's shy doesn't mean she's gay, unlike those two liars.

Scowling, the godmother refutes this and, in the middle, glances at her wand. No…damn Cosmo, can't she leave him alone for ten minutes without causing trouble? There are people who need her more than her stubborn godson!

"I'm afraid, sweetie, that I'm needed elsewhere…"

"Fine," Tootie says coldly, hating Timmy with all that is her at the moment. How dare he think he need his godmother more than her! What's the matter, can't he get the condom on right? What a selfish son of a bitch!

"I'm really sorry, sport…" And she truly did look it. But Tootie was beyond caring. She glowered at the dispersing fairy.

Softly, hugging her arms to her chest and watching Vicky's children destroy another relic she'd labored months over, she moans, "I wish I were dead…."

------

It's the crack heard 'round the world. Wanda draws her hand back and slaps Timmy hard. He gasps, holding his wounded cheek. What's her problem?

"Cosmo can attest to this," She says, her voice trembling, "I rarely hit my godchildren. However, I think this may be the only thing to return you to reality."

"Bet Fairy World didn't like it when you hit them," Timmy mutters, and the words cause her to blanch. She's bending a rule right now to see Tootie…if he carries out with any threat regarding her and them, she might be out of a job and Tootie will be more than out of luck.

Cosmo, playing Timmy's video game system silently, gazes at her worriedly. She's always frustrated with him lately and he knows the only way to make her feel better is to tell him, but she won't. She's being just as stubborn as him and keeping the truth from him.

Turning back to play the video game system (the 'emergency' was because Timmy was losing), Timmy barely hears her rant at him. Cosmo does, and he shrinks down, terrified. Wanda truly is a loaded pistol when she's furious. He'll be in his fishbowl if anyone wants him.

"I'm glad at least you're using protection just in case you get your gay girlfriend pregnant!" Wanda blurts. This, of course, Timmy hears. What has she done?

"She isn't gay! Damn it, I'm sick of everyone calling her that!" Jumping up, he grabs his jacket and runs out of the room. Wanda, deciding to remain there, stares after him. When will he get it?

-----

Trixie slams her head against her dashboard repeatedly. Far from placating her, it garners the world's largest headache (aside from, you know, ramming your head into a metal door). By the time she's done punishing herself, she's going to own a migraine the size of Alaska.

"How could I have been so stupid, damn it!" Shrieking, she yet again inflicts pain upon herself. However, just as she raises her head, she spots Veronica, dashing out to the car. But she thought she didn't want anything to do with her?

"Trixie…don't beat yourself up…just break up with Timmy before…" Before what? She's already gotten involved with him too deeply- she can't possibly disentangle herself from the web of lies she's woven without shattering his heart to pieces.

"I…I can't do that…I need to be…with him…" Trixie lies, feeling herself rip apart at the seams. Veronica cups her chin in her palm and leans forward.

"Do you? Why?" Climbing into the car, she half sits on her lap. If she's trying to keep her distance, why is she coming onto her? Nothing makes sense anymore!

"To please yourself…or because you want to be popular?

"If I learned anything today, it's that popularity isn't everything…and if it meant that I had to lose it all to find happiness with you, well, I'm not complaining. But I just thought I'd give you a little incentive."

Pulling her out of the car, she yanks open the backseat door and falls upon her, kissing her passionately. Sparks fly and Trixie caresses her back. Suddenly, Veronica isn't too sure this was such a great idea….

A shadow moves behind them…they aren't alone…