Truths
By Neurotica
Twenty-Three
Sirius woke the next morning with a strange feeling in his stomach. Whether it was hunger or nerves, he didn't know. He opened his eyes and looked blearily at the ceiling, trying to remember what he had been dreaming about. It had something to do with a coconut, a box of Filibuster Fireworks, and Snape. Normally, the thought of pranking Snape made Sirius giddy, but not this morning. He had the feeling something wasn't quite right in the world.
Shaking off the feeling momentarily and going with the hunger hypothesis, Sirius got out of bed and headed to Harry's room to take him for some breakfast. At that very moment, Sirius' stomach growled loudly as if it was telling him to get a move on already.
Sirius opened Harry's door fully and looked into the room. All thoughts of food drained from him in an instant. He raised an eyebrow. Harry's bed was empty. "Harry?" he called to the empty room.
He walked across the wooden floor to Harry's bed. His godson's glasses were gone, and his bed felt as if it had been empty for hours. Glancing at his watch, his feelings of unrest increased—it was only 8:30; Harry never got up this early...
Striding out of the room, Sirius crossed to the bathroom which was empty. "Harry?" he called again. There was no answer.
Where could he be?
Trying not to get frantic, Sirius went back to Harry's room for another look. It was obvious Harry wasn't in the vicinity, so he checked the rest of the quarters, including under his own bed, finding nothing.
"Harry, where are you?" he yelled across the common room. Maybe Harry was playing a game of hide-and-seek with his unknowing godfather. "Harry James Potter, if you are in this room, come out NOW!"
Nothing, not even a giggle giving away Harry's location. Sirius spun on his heel to search the room for the hundredth time. It was then that Sirius noticed three things he had somehow missed on his initial searches: Harry's jacket was gone, so were his shoes, and why the hell was the door open?
Sirius ran out of the room full speed wearing only his plaid pajama bottoms, and ran half-naked along the Hogwarts corridors calling for Harry. He turned a corner and ran full force into none other than the Headmaster. Sirius was knocked to the ground, but somehow, the older man stayed where he stood.
Dumbledore looked amusedly down at Sirius' panting, breathless form. "My dear boy," Dumbledore said, reaching out a hand to help the younger wizard up, "why are you in such a hurry?"
Sirius stood and immediately began telling Dumbledore what happened. "Harry! He's gone! I don't know where he is! You have to help me find him!" he said, panicking.
The amusement evident on the Headmaster's face died. "Calm yourself, Sirius. We will find Harry. He can't have gone far."
Sirius took a few deep breaths, trying and failing to remain calm, before Dumbledore spoke again. "Where do you think Harry could have gone, Sirius?" he asked quietly. He was quite calm under the circumstances, which helped to calm Sirius down a bit.
"I-I don't—" Sirius broke off, his face had gone, if possible, even more white than before he was knocked to the ground. "Prongs," he breathed with wide eyes.
"What do you mean, Sirius?"
"Prongs! Harry's stag! Harry dropped it while we were at Hagrid's last night!" Sirius cried impatiently. "I-I think he tried to wake me up last night to tell me, but..." His voice cracked. He stared unseeingly into the opposite corridor.
"Come, then," Dumbledore said, snapping Sirius away from his thoughts. "We will go to Hagrid's."
Half-running, Sirius and Dumbledore made their way through the castle and across the grounds. Hagrid and Fang were already up and outside, tending to gamekeeper's garden.
"Hagrid!" Dumbledore called as they moved towards the garden.
"Professor Dumbledore, sir, Sirius, good mornin'! Sirius, why ain't you dressed?" Hagrid said cheerfully.
"Now is not the time for that, Hagrid," Dumbledore said quickly. "Have you seen Harry this morning?"
"No, I haven'," Hagrid replied, looking a tad confused by the question. "But I did find tha' stuffed animal he carries ev'rywhere."
Hagrid reached into one of his many coat pockets and pulled out Harry's stag. Sirius grabbed for it, tears unknowingly welling in his gray eyes.
"Sirius," Dumbledore said gently. "Would Harry have gone into the forest by chance?"
"The forest?" Hagrid asked loudly. "Why would he—" Dumbledore silenced him so that Sirius could speak.
Sirius sniffed and looked into the dark trees. "Not without me or his stag," he replied flatly.
"I should like to search the forest and grounds for Harry. With any luck, we will find him nearby and unharmed. Hagrid, inform the staff to begin searching the castle, grounds, and Hogsmeade. Sirius and I will begin in the forest. Have Minerva contact Remus and bring him here," Dumbledore said.
Hagrid looked both confused and horrified at the prospect of Harry being alone in the forest, but did as he was told. He left Fang with Sirius and Dumbledore, and bounded quickly to the castle.
"Come, Sirius, let's begin," Dumbledore said quietly.
Sirius nodded slowly. Not lessening his grasp on Harry's stag, he followed Dumbledore into the forest.
Remus awoke as the sun's morning rays hit his corner. For the second month in a row, he had had a pleasant, quiet, and most importantly, pain-free full moon. He pulled on a pair of pajama bottoms and started up the stairs to make some breakfast; he was unusually hungry. Remus retrieved his wand from the kitchen table and started to heat the stove.
Just as he pulled out an egg from the fridge, a pop from behind him caused him to drop the object in his hand. Remus turned around and found panicked Minerva McGonagall.
"Professor, what are you—" Remus was cut off.
"Harry was not in his bed this morning. Dumbledore and Sirius are currently searching the forest. You need to come quickly, Remus," McGonagall said in one shaky breath.
"Wasn't in his bed? Why the hell not?" Remus said calmly, though his insides were tightening in fear.
"I don't know," McGonagall said. "We need to get back to the castle."
Remus ran to his bedroom and pulled on the first shirt he spotted. Once he put on his untied shoes, he ran back to the kitchen where McGonagall waited patiently.
Without a word, both Apparated to the Hogwarts gates. Not waiting for his former professor, Remus sprinted full force in the direction of the forest. He came to a halt just before Hagrid as the tall man stepped out of his hut, his bow in his hand.
"Where—are—they?" Remus panted frantically.
"Still in the forest," Hagrid replied. "I was just headin' in there meself to help 'em."
Before either of them could speak another word, Dumbledore, Fang, and a very panicked looking Sirius emerged from the trees.
"Where is he?" Remus yelled, crossing to the other two.
Sirius, it seemed, couldn't speak, and Remus was sure he hadn't not even noticed him, let alone heard him. Sirius collapsed unknowingly in the very spot Harry had been taken from the night before.
"We have searched the forest. The centaurs, who were most helpful, claim to have seen a man in a black cloak with an unconscious boy that matches Harry's description in his arms late last night. I believe they have Apparated away," Dumbledore explained.
"That's impossible!" Remus roared. "You can't Apparate or Disapparate on Hogwarts grounds! You—"
Dumbledore silenced him. "There is a spot, deep within the forest, from which one can Apparate or Disapparate. Not many know of it. That knowledge is only held by two living people: myself and Tom Riddle."
"Who the hell is Tom Riddle?" Remus screamed. Not understanding why Dumbledore could be so calm.
"Voldemort."
It was now Remus' turn to fall shaking to the ground. Sirius must have been already told this information, which explained his current state.
Voldemort knows how to get in and out of Hogwarts? Remus thought, horrified. Does that mean he has Harry?
"Please, Sirius, Remus, come to my office. I will need to alert the Minister of this," Dumbledore said quietly.
With Hagrid's help, Sirius and Remus made their way to Dumbledore's office. Neither wizard really knew where they were going; they were too far into their own thoughts to really care.
As they walked, thousands of thoughts flooded Remus' mind. Where was Harry? Was he okay? Was he hurt? Was he hungry? Was he cold? Was he... dead? That last thought nearly made Remus' legs collapse from beneath him, but Hagrid, thankfully, maintained a tight old of his arm.
The journey to Dumbledore's office was made in silence broken only when Dumbledore spoke the password to the stone gargoyle. Wordlessly, Hagrid helped Sirius and Remus to Dumbledore's sofa, and sat in a chair across from the headmaster's desk. Sirius hadn't said a word since Remus' arrival; he sat clutching Harry's stag closely to his chest, too stunned to even cry.
Dumbledore Flooed the Ministry and spoke at lengths with both Minister Bones and Alastor Moody. Remus heard none of the words—he was numb again. His mind was completely empty of all thoughts, his body numb from any feeling.
How could this have happened?
Many long minutes later, Dumbledore left the fireplace and sat heavily into his chair, staring at the two distraught men before him.
Remus somehow managed to raise his head, and speak only one word to the Headmaster. "How?"
Dumbledore remained silent for a moment. "From what I have gathered, Harry left his stuffed animal near the forest last night. He tried to wake Sirius, but was unsuccessful. Harry took it upon himself to cross the grounds to retrieve his stag, and I believe that was when he was taken."
Remus remained quiet, letting the words Dumbledore had spoken sink in. Harry left a toy by the forest. On a full moon. The scenario was so familiar to Remus; in his case, he was bitten by a werewolf, not kidnapped.
A sudden surge of anger built up in Remus. He stood, and turned furiously towards Sirius. "HOW COULD YOU LET HIM GO LIKE THAT? ARE YOU REALLY THAT IRRESPONSIBLE? YOU IGNORED HIM WHEN HE WAS TRYING TO GET YOUR ATTENTION, AND LOOK WHAT HAPPENED! HOW COULD YOU, SIRIUS? THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! I TRUSTED YOU TO KEEP HIM SAFE AND THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS? YOU LET YOUR BEST FRIENDS' SON GET KIDNAPPED BY GOD KNOWS WHO!" Remus yelled like he had never done before. If you were to ask him months from now why he had blamed it all on Sirius, he wouldn't be able to say.
Dumbledore and Hagrid were stunned; they had never seen Remus lose his temper like this before. The last time Dumbledore had seen the wrath of the werewolf was in his sixth year when Sirius told Snape how to get past the Whomping Willow. But even that was nothing compared to Remus' face currently.
Sirius remained the way he was before Remus yelled. He continued to stare at Dumbledore's desk. He had heard Remus shout, everyone in the castle probably had, but only certain phrases got through to his brain. But he couldn't react immediately.
Sirius looked up with wide, wet eyes and looked at his friend. Hagrid had reprimanded him in the fear Remus would attack his friend. "Sorry..." Sirius whispered over and over.
Remus fell limp in Hagrid's arms, overcome with emotion at the look on Sirius' face, and the thought of never seeing Harry again. Hagrid sat Remus gently in a chair, while Dumbledore watched the exchange, his face betraying no emotion.
After things had calmed, Dumbledore spoke quietly. "Alastor is sending four teams of Aurors to search the grounds, forest, and castle more thoroughly for any possible clues. They should be arriving any moment."
Remus and Sirius barely heard him.
Dumbledore gently asked Sirius to recount the day's events from when he and Harry left the castle, to the morning. He did so without any emotion.
"...And when we were getting ready to go into the castle," he said in a hollow voice, "we ran into..." Sirius paused, his eyes showing a revelation. "Malfoy."
"Lucius Malfoy?" Dumbledore said sharply.
Sirius nodded numbly. "Him and his house-elf. He said he was meeting with you," he said, meeting Dumbledore's eyes.
Dumbledore stood and turned to Hagrid. "Hagrid," he said quickly. "Find Alastor Moody and tell him to send an Auror team to search Malfoy Manor."
Hagrid stood, nodded, and quickly left the office.
"Do you think Malfoy has Harry?" Remus said hoarsely. The yelling he had done at Sirius did a number on his throat; it felt raw.
"I do not know, Remus, but it cannot hurt to check."
Dumbledore then excused himself to have a word with the staff and Aurors, leaving Sirius and Remus alone.
Remus lifted his head, and looked to his best friend. He was a bit startled to find Sirius looking back. Remus didn't fail to notice the haunted look Azkaban had left in Sirius' eyes had returned in full force.
"I'm sorry," Sirius whispered again, almost pleadingly.
"And I'm sorry for yelling at you," Remus responded.
They both looked away, carried by their thoughts. Neither man wanted to even speculate that Harry may have already been killed. Or worse.
Why would Voldemort want Harry? That was an easy one... that damned prophecy. Dumbledore said the Dark Lord had not heard it all, but that only meant that Voldemort wouldn't hesitate to send one of his cronies to kidnap Harry and kill him.
What else could Voldemort want from him?
Sirius and Remus waited quietly and impatiently for Dumbledore's return.
It seemed like hours later had passed when Dumbledore finally walked through the office door once again. This time he was accompanied by Sirius's boss, Alastor Moody.
The younger wizards looked expectantly at Dumbledore as he sat behind his desk.
"Alastor has sent a team to search Lucius Malfoy's home. They are to report back immediately if anything is found. The forest will be searched for a third time, shortly. The second turned up nothing," the headmaster said.
"You said there was an Apparition point in the forest," Remus began hoarsely. "How does Voldemort know about it?"
Dumbledore sighed heavily. "In his youth, Voldemort was known as Tom Riddle. He attended school here, and was even appointed Head Boy. One night, Tom was exploring the forest and happened upon the spot. The H at the time, Armando Dippet, had placed wards around the grounds and forest to warn him if any student was to cross its bounds. Dippet heard the wards sound, and a search was commenced by myself and the groundskeeper at the time, Ogg. Deep into the forest, our search resulted in finding Tom Riddle, at this time, Head Boy, Apparating in a spot void of grass or growth of any kind.
"Tom was, of course, taken back to the castle and thoroughly questioned as to how he learned how to Apparate from the Forbidden Forest, and where he had been. Our questioning led to nothing; Tom claimed he happened upon the spot accidentally and had never used it before that night. He said he had been in Diagon Alley.
"After Tom left this office and returned to the Head Boy quarters, I returned to the forest and placed an exceptionally strong anti-Apparition charm around the area. It has been in place for nearly forty years. The charms must have worn off recently, allowing Apparition," Dumbledore concluded.
The room remained in stone cold silence—the other three occupants were staring open-mouthed at Dumbledore. Nobody knew what to say.
"We will find Harry," Dumbledore said as he stood after long minutes of silence. "If you'll excuse Alastor and myself, we must speak with the staff."
He and Moody left once more to speak with the Auror teams.
"We have to find him," Sirius spoke. "We have to get him back..."
Remus couldn't have responded if he knew how to comfort his friend; he couldn't even comfort himself.
Sirius was right; they had to get Harry back. Remus wanted to believe what Dumbledore said—they would get Harry back—but there was still a nagging voice inside his head shouting what if...
Hours had passed since Harry had disappeared. Morning turned to early afternoon, and no news as to where Harry could possibly be had come.
There were no leads at Malfoy Manor, and Malfoy himself had offered his services to aid their search for the "charming little boy," as he put it. Remus and Sirius were sure the blond-headed git was laughing after the Aurors walked out his door when the search ended.
And as for Remus and Sirius, the two wizards assisted in searching everywhere around Hogwarts, even enlisting the help of the Marauder's Map, but found no trace of Harry anywhere. Dumbledore had half-heartedly suggested they get a bite to eat in the kitchens, but no matter how much food was placed before them, neither could eat anything.
"Do you think he's okay?" Sirius asked quietly.
Remus looked at his pale, grief-stricken friend. He looked exactly how Remus felt: empty. "I hope so," he responded hoarsely.
"I should be out there. I need to be searching for Harry. I shouldn't be sitting in this goddamned kitchen doing nothing!" Sirius said loudly. He banged his fist on the table, causing a few plates of food to fall to the ground and shatter. Some of the house-elves rushed to clean the mess; neither wizard noticed.
For Remus, it felt as though he was losing Lily and James all over again. He'd had a taste of what happiness could be, and once again, it was violently ripped away from him. Remus had sworn he would never allow any harm to fall upon Harry and Sirius. He failed.
Harry was god knows where, with god knows who, having god knows what being done to him.
And Sirius... Sirius looked as though he had lost everything in a few short hours. His life had collapsed around him again. Harry had become Sirius' world in less than two months. His life revolved around his godson—the son of his two best friends. Sirius wanting to jump into action and rescue Harry was no surprise, but Remus knew it would be best to leave it to the Aurors who weren't so emotionally attached.
For the moment anyway...
Sirius stood suddenly. "I'm going to see if Dumbledore's heard anything, yet."
Remus nodded, and silently followed Sirius out the kitchen doors and in the direction of the Headmaster's office. Sirius, Remus noted, still held Harry's stag close to him; he hadn't let it out of his sight once.
Walking through the corridors, a vague thought drifted through Remus' mind: today was the first of September; in a few short hours, the new term for Hogwarts students would begin. They were probably heading to the Hogsmeade station that very moment, enjoying treats from the lunch trolley.
In five years, Harry would be one of those students. Laughing and meeting new friends, just as Remus had done his first day of school. He would make his way through the Great Hall, try on the Sorting Hat. No doubt that Harry would be sorted into Gryffindor, just like his parents.
If he lives that long... said a sinister voice in Remus' mind.
Shut up, Remus thought back firmly. He will be okay...
Remus said the password to get to Dumbledore's office and after the gargoyle moved, Sirius led the way slowly up the spiral staircase.
Sirius quietly knocked on the door using the golden lion doorknocker and the door swung open slowly on its own accord.
Before Remus could move into the doorway, Sirius stopped in his tracks.
"What the hell is he doing here?" Sirius yelled.
Remus stepped around his friend and groaned inwardly. Sitting across from Dumbledore was the one person who could quite possibly make the entire situation ten times worse: Severus Snape.