A/N: Ok. My muse has thought. I dunno if I ever actually told you of my muse. His name is Thadd. He is a fox. Anyway, he has had a bit of time to think, so I believe I can now carry on.
If we remember the last chapter, we will know that Legolas had been running from a young fell beast and had run bodily (how else?) into Lego-lover. We left them as the beast could be heard in pursuit. However, I will not return to them at this precise moment. Evil of me, huh?
Elrohir and Glorfindel dragged Elladan to the clearing that Elrond had made his home. Their intent was to take him to the dead faint house. But, only as they reached the charred remains did Elrohir remember that it was no longer standing.
"Crap!" Was all he could say, and Glorfindel gave him the evil eye for cursing. "This friddin sucks! We don't have any place to put this lump!" Glorfindel winced and nodded.
"Indeed, friend. This is a sore blow. We must administer to him here, as best as we can."
"Dude! Did you jist say asbestos?" Elrohir looked confused.
"Ummm, no. Curses! This is gonna be harder than I thought." Glorfindel stood up and randomly disappeared. We don't know why, or, for that matter how. But that is what happened. Absoloodle.
Elrohir was not even fazed by the sudden disappearance. After all, this was a very common occurrence with Glorfindel, and they'd been friends a long time. And I really mean a long time. He simply knelt beside his twin and began shouting in his ear.
Now we shall return to Legolas and the lover of him. If that makes any sense. No. Anyway, Legolas very nearly passed out now that he was grounded and the beast was still after him. Lego-lover caught her breath and was at first delighted to find the object of her devotion sitting upon her. Then a tremor of fear beset her as she heard the imminent approach of a large thing. The thing was not only large, but also rather fierce if even Legolas was running from it. Then her scatter-brain remembered the beast of the clearing and she simply got angry. She shoved Legolas off of her rather harshly, making him whimper. Standing up, she searched for something with which to challenge the beast.
She found nothing, as Legolas was now quite unarmed. So she squared off to the charging beast. It skidded to a halt in front of her and hesitated; she meant business. It began to slowly turn, perhaps to find some easier prey, but Lego-lover was too enraged to let it go quietly. She leapt onto its scaly neck (you remember that they have hecka long necks.) and began beating it over the head with her fists. This young beastie new not how to deal with this sudden harsh attack. Fell beasts were not attacked, it jist didn't happen. Well, one was once, on the Pellenor. A girl took the head offa this liddle one's pa. That is, of course, another story, but it is kinda ironic that a girl was assaulting this one too. Ah well. The beast fluttered its wings and squealed in the normal fell beast way, and generally thrashed about. Lego-lover hung on and yelled as she pummeled the creature.
Legolas lay sprawled on the grass where he had been rather roughly shoved and listened to the noise with a quaking heart. He was sure that the girl was being consumed, though he thought the process was taking rather long. He rolled onto his back, sat up and opened his eyes. What he saw, I have already described. He took the scene in with awe. Never before had he seen such a brave female, especially a female Man. Of course, he had known Eowyn, but he was forgetting her. Anyway he had a brief thought that he should help Lego-lover because he was, after all, the male. But the thought passes and he slipped into the underbrush and left the girl to fend for herself. And she was doing rather well.
Elrond shook his head. Where in Iluvatar's purse was he? He saw only an empty clearing. He found himself lying on a convenient pile of soft leave. How in the name of Manwe's hairs had he ended up here? Then the previous chapter flooded back to him with the noise of Lego-lover's combat. He stood up and straightened his tie…yeah tie, and strode off in the other direction. As he entered the inhabited part of the random wood Elrond met Gandalf. Gandalf had just been shown out of the pub and was stumbling around awkwardly. Elrond caught the lizard, that is, Wizard, as he was about to face plant into one of Clebrian's exotic potted flowers. Elrond was more worried about the anger of his wife than of Gandalf actually getting hurt. (Interjection: Celebrian is now in this story because I think that Mandos would have let her back. She died of orc poison, she was good. So she is here. And she likes flowers. So there.)
"Ah, now there's a good lad." Gandalf allowed himself to be seated upon the ground and he fumbled for his pipe. Elrond held a match and soon the Wizard had a regular steam engine going.
"Mithrandir." Elrond said through the think cloud of smoke. "Mith. Do you know of anything that has been going on?" He prodded the Wizard.
"Oh my dear boy." Gandalf started and turned toward Elrond. "Well, not boy. Anyway, whatever do you mean?"
"The world as we know it is falling apart. It is finished!" Elrond shouted at Gandalf.
"Eh? What's that you say?" Gandalf chuckled. "The end of the world, heh? Well, it has been said before." He nodded. "But you still haven't answered my question. Whatever do you mean?"
"Have you not heard the commotion, see the signs?" Elrond began to get exasperated.
"I spoke you your son earlier. He was looking for Legolas. I wonder if he was found." Gandalf mumbled mostly to himself.
"Yes! Yes, he was found, only to be lost again." Elrond stood up to try to escape the billowing smoke. He glanced towards what once was his precious dead faint house and saw his sons. One leaning over the other and shouting. "I wonder what that is all about."
Gandalf unsteadily gained his feet and peered through his cloud at the twins. "Ah, kids these days. They will do anything for entertainment." He sighed and slumped back down, right into Celebrian's exotic flowers.
A/N: I think that is long enough for now. It seems that though my muse may have returned to me, he has not deemed it essential to give me truly good material. So I leave you for now with these circumstances. And I will certainly try to get Thadd working harder for me so I can post again soon.