Chapter Twenty-Three: Mercy
There is not much that compares with waking to the soft warmth of a woman in your arms, Severus thought. Marry that to the woman being the one you'd dreamed of being with since childhood and there was nothing he'd known so far that could even come close. Perhaps someday, when things were more secure, when he was much, much more certain of the woman in question, he'd know what it was like to lie with her in the calm after the passionate storm of their love.
Until then, he could satisfy himself with this, the tiny murmurs and moans as she shifted in her sleep, the way her brow would knit as she dreamed of Merlin knew what. He'd been awake for quite some time now, just watching her face in the growing light of dawn, not daring to stir for fear that he should wake her and destroy the sweet spell in which they lay.
How was it that he, so long a maniacally solitary creature, had become almost desperately protective just moments after laying eyes on her once more? From the instant he'd spotted her wasted, filthy form shivering on the stone floor of her cell, he'd wanted nothing more than to gather her into his arms and protect her from anything that would ever harm her again, to give her warmth and comfort and the love that he had denied her all those years ago.
It was moot now, anyway, the argument that he wasn't good enough for her, that she would be marrying beneath her station. Presently, her family's name was much less respected than his own. Ironic, that they had each turned the reputations of their respective bloodlines around completely. He for the better and she for the worse.
She still wanted him, though. That had not changed in the slightest.
But, her damnable hunger for power, that was a concern. The Dark Lord and his faithful would be more than happy to allow her lusts to consume her once more, to drag her by her more base desires down a dark path to a bleak fortune she would regret for the rest of her days. For, no matter how terrible the Dark Lord's retribution, how horrid her death would be if she turned her back on him and was captured, living with the guilt of what she would be forced to do in his name would be far, far worse. How the devil had she managed to forget what she felt after her father's death? And, her brother's? And if it no longer affected her, then why would she not speak of it?
He sighed deeply, blowing a wisp of red hair across her face. It was a quandary, to be sure, one that would need to be addressed before he could trust himself to offer again what he had so foolishly offered only a few hours before. He had regretted the invitation the moment he'd alluded to it, but the words could not be taken back, and she knew precisely what they meant. Unfortunately, knowing him as well as she did, she also knew damn well why he was offering. And, Slytherin though she was, she undoubtedly had no desire to offer up her virtue as a matter of manipulation, even one she had teasingly requested.
His thoughts stopped their incessant racing and backpedaled for a moment to the subject of her virginity. How in the name of Merlin had she reached her present age without ever having known a man? He'd grant her the sixteen years in Azkaban, but she'd been in her early twenties, a ripe and lovely young woman, when she was sentenced to life in prison. With all the attention she received from every man who had ever known her, it was a wonder she'd kept her purity to the age of consent, much less so far beyond it. For a moment, he allowed himself the fantasy that she couldn't bear to be with anyone but the man she loved, then pushed the thought aside with an ugly sneer. Emily had never been one to deny herself pleasure. When she wanted something, she procured it and damn the consequences. Her heart was a consideration that fell well below her base desires.
And, on the subject of cravings, when she'd told him that Malfoy had chosen her on Solstice because she was a virgin, it had sent a surge of pure lust through his suddenly very eager manhood. There were times since then that he'd had to walk away from her rather than allow himself to be tempted to take her for that reason alone. To break through that barrier of innocence, to have what no one else had desecrated, to take her virtue and keep the memory of it locked inside where it could be treasured and honored as it should, that was a longing which was rapidly becoming a dangerous need.
Nevertheless, he had only to remind himself of the mark on her arm and her loyalties to the creature who'd put it there to keep himself in check.
Suddenly, with a tiny, almost embarrassed, pop, two trays appeared at their respective bedsides. He had to give a quick grin. Liri never missed a trick.
Likely stirred by the scrumptious smell coming from the trays, Emily moaned softly, then awoke, blinking in the soft light filtering in through the window.
"Oh, yes," she sighed, stretching languidly, "I could definitely get used to waking in your arms." There was a brief flash of pain in her eyes, gone so quickly that he wondered if he'd imagined it.
"Could you?" he inquired, speaking in his softest voice, unwilling to disturb the intimacy of the moment.
"I certainly could." She smiled up at him. "And how long have you been awake?"
Meaning: 'How long have you been staring at me?' he thought with a hidden smirk.
"Quite some time," he returned. "I find that your company is vastly more tolerable when you're unconscious and didn't wish to waste the opportunity to enjoy it."
She gave a short huff of laughter before raising up on her elbows to deposit a sweet kiss on his cheek. "Flattery will get you whatever you want," she whispered in a tone which was far too sober for his comfort.
"What I want, presently, is to see you eat something," he replied dryly, pointedly ignoring her invitation, wishing that his body would follow his mind's example. When she offered no argument, he turned from her to make himself comfortable against the headboard.
"Breakfast in bed?" she asked skeptically. "I never would've imagined you were the type."
"I shudder to think that I am ever a wholly predictable man," he answered, waving the tray over his lap. "Now, eat your breakfast."
She released an indelicate snort of laughter. "Yes, Mummy."
"You need a mother, Emily," he replied bluntly, ignoring her look of surprised indignation. "But in the absence of said maternal figure, I will most assuredly be watching after you."
"And, why is that?" she asked, chuckling lightly as she turned to face him.
He didn't answer, merely faced her with a look that, years ago, would've answered the question for her, curious to know whether her ability to read in his face what he refused to say had faded entirely. To his immense satisfaction, the comprehension slowly dawned in her eyes as she realized that she did know. Indeed she'd known all along.
A soft smile spread across her features, as she reached up to brush from his eyes a lock of stray hair. "I love you, too," she answered softly.
So, she could still read him. Interesting. For a moment more he searched her eyes, seeming to reach into her very soul, then the gaze was softened by a slight quirk teasing the corner of his mouth. "Well. I never said that," he mumbled dryly, returning to his sausage.
An amiable conversation ensued shortly afterward, both of them desiring to lighten the solemnity that seemed to have fallen, and continued through breakfast until she excused herself to her own chambers to shower and dress, leaving him with an inexplicable sense of impending doom. Resolutely, he shook it off, attributing the discomfort to an unusual night followed by an equally unusual, if thoroughly pleasant, morning.
An overly-enthusiastic wind gusted across the torch-lined tower, threatening Emily's already precarious balance as the world swam about her head and her stomach offered up a violent, rolling protest. Severus strode carelessly to the edge to look over, but whirled about at her sharp objection. For a moment, he studied her with a frown, then allowed his features to relax into a disbelieving smirk.
"Merlin's beard, Emily, I had completely forgotten about your lamentable phobia."
"It's not a phobia," she argued stiffly, still frozen at the top of the stairs, unable to convince herself to move into the center where their task awaited them. "Anyone with a smattering of common sense would exercise caution when standing on one of the tallest towers of the school. Now, get away from there!" This last sentence was spoken with such panic that she blushed violently at the evidence of her terror.
In his typically deliberate manner, Severus made a point of closing the distance between himself and the low wall that encircled the tower with such nonchalance that he could've been taking a Sunday stroll across the grounds. Reaching the edge, he peered over. "This would be quite a dramatic way to end one's life," he said dryly. "If ever you feel suicidal again..."
"Not funny, Sev," she snapped. "Please, move away from there," she requested in a more reasonable tone. Why she was so concerned about his falling when it had the potential to suit her purpose perfectly was quite beyond her. Of course, with a simple levitation spell, the fall had no chance of being fatal. Still, the idea of Severus plummeting to his death tied her stomach into knots, and did not bode well for the completion of her task. With a deep breath, she steeled her heart and settled within her mind his inevitable demise.
"It has been a constant wonder to me," Severus said, making his way casually back to his companion, "this terror of heights when you are ever anxious to climb on a broomstick whenever circumstance allows. There is almost no possibility whatsoever of falling from this tower. A broomstick, however, offers no..."
"Unlike you, Severus Snape, I do not fall off of my broom every time the wind blows."
His eyes flashed dangerously. "Had the skill any merit whatsoever, I would have seen fit to master it. As it is, flying is the most preposterous, juvenile, and ostentatious method of travel I have ever known. For anyone to bother with it after passing the tests is wholly inappropriate. I wonder how many full grown witches and wizards ever consider how absurd they appear using a child's method of recreation to travel."
For a moment, her temper flared. Then, realizing the source of the tirade, she began to laugh.
"And, what, dare I ask, do you find so amusing?" he asked stiffly.
She stifled her merriment long enough to speak. "You will give any excuse you can find, housed in the most condescending, abstruse phrases you know to cover your insecurities whenever they present themselves. It's positively precious!" His chin raised a fraction. "Don't give me that look. I've just figured out why you've won every argument you've ever had. It's because no one understands a damn thing you're saying. There can be no logical recourse when one is totally confounded by the other's vocabulary."
A single eyebrow rose to its zenith, causing a slight tremor of alarm to race down her spine and weaken her legs, before Severus gave his answer. With a swift pivot, he turned back to the center of the tower, strode through the borders of the circle, and was immediately swallowed by a blaring red beam of light that shot toward the heavens like a beacon.
For a moment she was petrified, but concern for both their lives shook her from her brief stupor and brought her to her knees at the edge of the circle. She had completed the first rune by the time the shadow fell over the tower.
Please, Merlin, don't let it be what I think it is!
A screeching scream tore through the sky and the air left her lungs in a rush. Well, I wanted something that could end it quickly for him, she thought, turning her face skyward to stare in awe at the enormous Hungarian Horntail that had appeared out of nowhere. That should bloody well do it.
The impossibly huge creature dove for the potions master, a jet of flame leading the way. The rapidly-warming stone floor of the tower shook from the force of its body colliding with Snape's ward.
The ward held.
The potions master fell.
Emily's heart sank in her chest.
Severus straightened, then, wand extended, shoulders squared, and she returned to her work with renewed vigor. Now that she'd gotten the hang of it, she could carve and imbue the runes with accuracy and speed, especially when her life depended on the act.
She did her best to ignore whatever was happening above her, but it was intense... and hot. The air about her had become dry and heated in the last few minutes, burning her lungs as she fought to keep her breathing steady. At alarmingly frequent intervals, the tower shook, Severus shouted a renewed warding spell, and Emily cursed. Being buried in the rubble of a collapsing tower, pursued by a magically-incensed dragon was not the way she wanted to die, and not the way she preferred for Severus to meet his end, either.
His death should be the stuff of legends: standing his ground proudly, black cape billowing around his tall, proud frame, facing down one of the deadliest creatures known to wizardkind. Another bloodcurdling screech and a scraping crunch drew her eyes for an instant to the tower wall where the dragon now perched, its head thrown back on a serpentine neck, bellowing its rage to the heavens. A claw, almost as large as the tower's defender swiped with dizzying speed at Severus and visibly sunk into the ward tearing from Severus a hoarse shout of stubborn denial. Furious as it was, the dragon was not an unintelligent beast and knew a weakness when it felt one. The blows continued, its claws raking relentlessly, sinking further and further toward the potions master as he struggled to keep both the ward and his feet.
Emily forced her head back down as the dragon lunged, teeth snapping far too close now to the potion master's head. At this rate, she need not do anything but take her time. The professor would not long survive this encounter.
Suddenly, the beast was in the air once more, flipping its body in an amazing show of airborne acrobatics and slamming the spikes of its powerful tail home in what it now knew to be the weakest area of the ward. Snape let the protective barrier fall for a moment as the creature righted itself, preparing for another attack. A shouted command and deft movement of his wand produced a deep slash across the beast's face that certainly blinded it in one eye, but in the ensuing shower of blood, it was difficult to be certain.
The creature shook its head furiously, soaking the curving ward in blood, and spun once in the air, turning its body with a grace that defied both form and size to face the tower as it dove. Severus raised his wand to renew the ward just as Emily pulled hers away from the perfectly-carved, yet-to-be-imbued, final rune to level it at Snape's hand. There was no time to consider, only time to act. A disarming spell would do the trick, leave him helpless before a creature that would waste no time in ripping him to shreds, then she could imbue the rune and be done with both her tasks.
It was quick.
It was merciful.
It was utterly untraceable.
Lucius would be thrilled. And, why not? There was no hope for anyone who opposed him or his master. As it had always been, so it would always be. Any fool could see that. If only Severus had turned out to be less of a fool, it wouldn't have had to be this way. Knowing the power of their master and his servants, Sev still spoke of hope. Her hand shook for just a moment. But, there's no hope for us, my love. There never was. I'm so terribly sorry it had to end this way.
Calmly, with a detachment that would've made him proud, she steadied her aim and spoke.
Author's note: Wow! I actually had to put off the posting of this chapter so that I could answer the extravagant number of reviews. I'm so happy! You guys are just wonderful!
Captain Oblivious!: I love all the speculation about "that night." It's so much fun to read. I can't tell you, of course, if any of your ideas are correct, but I can say that (darn it all) some are your ideas are better than mine. I'm pleased that midterms went well for you, and I'm so unconcerned about your English paper that it hasn't occurred to me to give it a second thought. You'll do wonderfully; I know it. I remember the woes of having English teachers who were so blinkin' concerned about the way one should write (according to the textbook) that they had no concept of the endless varieties of the manner in which people do write. I sympathize with you, Captain. Nevertheless, you'll do wonderfully. I have all the confidence in the cosmos.
1 lonelyangel: Sorry about the suspense, sweetie. Wait a minute. No, I'm not (smirk). But, content yourself in the knowledge that I update twice to three times a week. I refuse to let my beloved readers hang on the cliff as some authors have left me. That's just not nice. I must say that your arguments against killing Severus are good ones. More Malfoy coming up. No worries.
Elessar Evenstar: Wow! That was one heck of a review! I did indeed mourn my beta reader, o I procured a time-turner and undid the damage. He's gotten a stern warning, though. One more overlooked typo and he's toast! Of course, at the mention of toast, his eyes grew wide, and he no longer seemed interested in what I was saying. Sigh! He's always hungry, that boy! What am I going to do with him? Your story about the 'flipendo' hex has me wanting to procure the HP game for the PC. I have it on PSII and don't get to do that kind of groovy stuff. Pooh! Your reasoning about Emily is sound. Perhaps she does love him too much to kill him, though it certainly doesn't seem that way right now. I know what you mean about failing to be Malfoy-esqu. I, too, have attempted to imitate his overconfident, menacing sexiness and failed miserably. Actually, I was called to carpet by my boss because I made a co-worker cry. I'll just stick to being my usual, muffin-baking, tea-serving, never-cursing-in-front-of-grandma, uber-nice-guy (or nice girl, as the case may be). I, like you, also lack the immaculate face and body to go with the whole picture. Oh, and the big, fat bank account. I saw 'Hero' as well and sobbed like a baby almost all the way through the damn thing. I'm kind of soft like that, though. Oh, last, but definitely not least, for Lucius-lovers like us, I highly recommend a fiction on Sycophant called 'Leda' by Corriander. It's unbelievable! Leave a review because this incredible author is really hurting for a good word or two. I'm attempting to review it chapter by chapter, but it's taking a really long time.
sev lover: I think perhaps the reason you don't like Lucius as much in these stories is that he's a genuine bad guy. He's harder to love, even for me. You are SO impatient for that smut scene. Aren't you? You know, just between us, I can really appreciate that.
Dianatyne: Oops! Didn't mean to kill you. I really like you. Here. Have a cup of revitalizing lemon zinger tea with a few lady fingers. That'll help. I'm still trying to work out whether I should be flattered or insulted by the whole 'heavy' chapter thing. You tell me. If you're being snarky, then you can just give back those snacks, missy! No cookies for you. Actually, driving someone to drink makes me pretty proud, I gotta admit. Yay! She's not bored. When you wake up hung over, I'll apologize and only snigger when you're out of earshot.
Teenage Zombie: You don't think she can do it, eh? Interesting. True, she's not strong willed, but she is damnably self-serving. And, if she fails to deliver, Malfoy's going to seriously kick her butt. Thanks for the compliment. I'll carry in my heart.
Sesshomaru's Angel: I hope you had a wonderful vacation, dear. You certainly deserve one. I promise that, no matter what happens, I won't keep you waiting long. Thanks for the all-but-breathless review of 'The Side I'm Always On.' That was sweet. There will be less Draco in the next addition. He'll be there, just not as often. Hope you don't mind.
emerald sparrow: Yes. I will definitely be writing a third installment of the Alex stories right after I wrap this one up. I'm actually stuck about halfway through the outline as we speak. Hope to see you there!
Oya!: Your vote has been duly noted. I'm glad you're enjoying the story. Hang up your coat. Grab a beanbag chair and a muffin and stick around. Glad to have you!
Quietude: Oh, I went into hysterics when I read this. The cat ran from the room I was laughing so hard. So, all of a sudden, Emily's not so bad, eh? Of course the part about smacking some sense into her, while hilarious, was quite poignant. And, just between us, that time is coming. Maybe not literally, but well... that'll do for inside info. I love how passionate you are about Emily's stupidity. It's so wonderful to me because, on many different levels, I can't help but agree with you. Thank you, thank you for the compliment on my characterization of Severus. As I am almost maniacally peculiar about how I write him, that is quite appreciated! He may not always be exactly canon all the time, but I always want him to be Snape. If I ever took away his Snapiness, I'd have to commit Hara-Kiri. It would be the only honorable solution.
Lady Jenilyn: Maybe the site ate your review. It's done it before, hasn't it? Lay off the Prozac. It's bad! Bad, I say! Here. Have some tea. In the words of Chien Po (Mulan), Relax, and chant with me. SeverusLuciusnaked...SeverusLuciusnaked...SeverusLuciusnaked.... You get the idea. I'm glad that you liked the flashback's tie in with the present situation. I can see Severus being very compassionate toward 'those select few' he deems worthy. I think Sadie would be one of those. Yeah. I'm right there with you. He'd have to pry me off of his body with a crowbar... and I'm not absolutely certain that that would stop me. I'm damnably resourceful when I need to be. Thanks for the good word. It helps. You know it helps! As for you, young lady.... (whip cracks in background) That's all I have to say on the matter. By the by, I know that you wanted Remus recommendations, but I have a great new one for Lucius. It's called Leda by Corriander on Sycophant Hex. Net. Excellent story! Great OC. Be sure to review! This poor girl's getting nothing, but silence, and it's a damn shame.