Title: Down
Author: Zee
Disclaimer: Don't try to change me in any way...
((NOTE)) AND HERE WE ARE!! Took a while, didn't it? I'm leaving on Sunday, so...yeah.
hide-chu: Fabulous. You're going to be gone for a month. Which means I won't have to LISTEN to you anymore.
Zee: Bitch, you're coming.
hide-chu: WHAT?!
Zee: MUAHAHAHAA here we go.
/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/
/This bog is thick and easy to get lost in.../
/I hope it sucks you down/
"So...what are you thinking about? I would like to know.
I would like to answer your questions. Because I have nothing better to do. And I suppose I need to say something.
Not just to another person, but myself too."
-Epitaph-Please-Write-Me, "The Difference Between Craziness and Insanity"
/o/
John loves Jamie, you know.
He really does.
Every time he see's him, it's the same feelings.
Love. Devotion. Adoration.
And happiness.
He wants to see the world with Jamie, wants to hold his hand, grumble that he's hogging all the covers. He wants to take Jamie on tours of the world, see everything with him, take the beautiful boy away from all the prejudice against their kind. He wants to write pages upon pages about Jamie's magnificent body, his amazing smile, his bright eyes that promise so many and too many things at one time. He wants to be able to lay Jamie down on a bed of roses, make sweet love to him, gentle love, wonderful love that will leave Jamie happily exhausted in John's sweaty arms. He wants to feed him the fruit from the tree of life and not feel the consequences, just the knowledge that John loves him and only him.
John wants to be able to wake up from a night of heavy love making to the sound of Jamie in the shower, be able to follow him inside the already steamy room and climb in with his young lover, wrap his arms around his naked waist, and smirk when Jamie jumps, surprised. Then he'll reach over for soap and gently begin to wash Jamie, paying special attention to his crotch, immersing himself into the sound of Jamie's moans like water(1). Then, when Jamie turns abruptly and kiss him hard, backing John against the wall, John will take him in his arms and slide a finger inside him, letting the shampoo scented steam, movement, and sex do the rest.
Then they'll lie together in their bed, the waves slamming up on the beaches of Australia (Jamie wanted to go to John's home country) acting as their background music as they sing a song of love in bed, the words being sung by their bodies in a melody of love and ecstasy.
And when they're done, when they're lying together in their sweaty, soiled bed, Jamie will look into John's eyes and whisper, "I love you..."
And John will finally be happy.
Because he loves Jamie, you know.
And he wants to be with him.
Forever.
/o/o/
"Hey Jamie, have a good time at the library?" Bobby slung an arm around Jamie's shoulder.
"I still don't get what you have against books." muttered Jamie, not really listening to what Bobby was saying. His thoughts were still focused on how strange John was acting at the movie. The feeling of John's tongue wrestling with his own, the way he had bit at his lips...it was worrisome. After leaving the theater, Jamie had actually gone to the library. But not to check out books. He had used the large mirror in the library bathroom to look at the half-moons embedded into his hips, courtesy of John's nails. But that wasn't the strangest part. When John had pulled Jamie on his lap, he had been so rough, so evil. Jamie had felt John's rock hard member pressing into his thigh. But when he had let Jamie go, he had looked so scared, so vulnerable. And then he told Jamie to leave.
Because John had thought he might hurt Jamie.
It was just so...not like John! John had always been gentle, kind, funny, sarcastic, obnoxious, loving, devoted to Jamie. Sure, sometimes Jamie suspected that his hesitance to "take it to the next level" annoyed John to no end, but he had always felt John understood that the only thing Jamie was ready for was kissing, holding hands, sleeping in the same bed without touching, maybe some making out when the mood overtook him, but certainly nothing like that.
Jamie was truly worried.
And Bobby jabbering in his ear was making it no better.
"Listen Bobby, I got some studying to do, can we talk later?" Jamie cut him of in mid-sentence.
Bobby shivered. "Eragh, studying. You're on your own, Jamie. See ya later!" he ran off, probably to have a 'piggy-back ride' with Sam.
Jamie trudged upstairs to his shared room. It was kind of annoying, really. He always waited so long for John, sometimes a week, sometimes months, just to see him again, go on a date again, and then John claims he doesn't feel good. Once Jamie had a fever of 100.6 and he came to see John on the weekend anyway. Of course, John had immediately sent him home after feeling his forehead and told him how stupid he was to go outside when he was that sick, but it was the principal of the thing.
Jamie flopped on his bed like a fish(2) and sighed. He would call John, if he could, but John never gave him a number, for fear that they'd be caught and both be in trouble. Jamie pouted. He doubted he would get in trouble. Only John would. And John probably wouldn't have gotten in trouble either, he just didn't want to talk to Jamie.
Jamie rolled over onto his side and sighed. "I wonder if he's thinking about me." he thought aloud.
/o/
"John. Pick up. The fucking. Phone." John glared at the phone, willing his hand to pick up the receiver and dial the number for the Xavier Institute.
As soon as John got home, he'd been trying to get up the courage to call Jamie. Well, that is, as soon as he finished ripping the dead cow Sabertooth practiced his fighting moves on to shreds, burning it, then eating it with some ketchup while pretending he was eating Jamie's flesh smothered in the boys blood. Then he'd decided to try and call Jamie.
So far, he was failing to do so.
The whole problem was, he wasn't sure that Jamie would be the one to pick up the phone. Almost all of the X-men knew his voice, and he wasn't that good at disguising it. Also, if they did recognize his voice, which they undoubtedly would, they would trace his call, thus putting the Acolytes in jeopardy. Then they would have to move again, and it would be God knows how long until John saw his beloved Jamie again.
Beloved?
Thank you GOD. Finally thinking like a normal person again.
John sigh in defeat and fell back on his bed. He seriously needed to get some help. Thoughts like this...they weren't right. John had always been smart. He had been more than smart, he'd been one of the most intelligent people who came out of Australia. Sure, he laughed like a maniac, he turned fire into horses and had it chase after people, but he wasn't crazy. He'd never been crazy.
At least, not like this.
Someone had once said there's a fine line between genius and insanity, and John had always been doing a shaky tightrope dance on that line. But when John thought of crazy, he thought of someone...well, he thought of someone in a Bugs Bunny suit going out and striking nine people to death with a steel dildo while whistling the Canadian national anthem. But he'd never thought of his thoughts towards Jamie as being crazy.
In the beginning, at least.
Because in the beginning, his only thoughts for Jamie were ones of pure love. He still had those thoughts, frequently. But as the relationship continued, he'd begun wondering what Jamie would taste like in his mouth. But not the boys dick, oh no, his skin. John had begun having the most obscure, disgusting, and immoral fantasies about Jamie.
And he liked them. He fucking liked them.
Hence the need to seek professional help.
The only problem was his job. John highly doubted that Magneto would listen to his story, nod knowingly, tell him that he had had the same feelings when he was young and recommend a world renowned psychologist to him. Hell no. Magneto would kill him for having a relationship with one of the enemy, never mind having those kinds of thoughts about the enemy.
John reached for his remote and turned on the television. American Psycho was on. John smiled.
This was the perfect movie to jack off to.
Oh GOD, John thought. What the FUCK is WRONG with me?!
/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/o/
(1)-...well, it made sense to me (-bitchgrumblemumblefuck-)
(2)-Heheheh...simile with a fish...
hide-chu: (-SLAP-) GET HELP, YOU FREAK!! THIS IS SO DAMN WRONG!!! DO YOU EVEN HAVE A PLOT?!?!
Zee: In that order: No, so what, and yes.
hide-chu: (-pleading to God-) whymewhymewhymewhymewhyme....
Zee: ...indeed. Anywoozle, reviews...
/o/
She-Wolf89: Thank you (-bows-) Oooh, you better believe it baby :D
Qindarka: I don't really understand this, but I'll try to answer...XD That's what I thought when I read it over. You can't see John lusting for Jamie? Well, yeah, I know they don't have any screen time together, BUT THAT IS THE WONDER OF FANFICTION!! John wants to do both to Jamie, don't you see XD yes, yes, poor poor poor dick-less Kyle. Dick-less. Hey, you're right, that is a cool word! Don't worry. I don't' know how your mind works either XDDD Thanks for the review, though!
childrenwithblades: I HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD TIME IN JAPAN!!! (-KILLS YOU-) I WANNA GO I WANNA GO I WANNA GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! But seriously, I hope you had a good time :D Thanks for pointing out the problems, I'll check this one over better...hopefully. It's 1:30 AM, I'm not sure I'll notice XD I know, they ROCK!
Dru: Isn't it? It's spelled 'disturbing', by the way XD;; Well, it's shoata gone American, whatcha gonna do, ne? Yeah, he does need help...heheheh
DemonRogue13: EVERYWHERE!! YOU'RE EVERYWHERE!! (-huggle-) Thankies!
nessie6: You know you like it, woman XD Dude, I have lost count of how many people I've corrupted XDD Well then thank GOD I didn't know you around Christmas time! I would have shot you with a badger! Pietro slash is fun! But I can see why you wouldn't like it, he seems to be you God-Of-All-Characters XD PIETRO/PYRO ALL THE WAY, BABY!! He does. He has problems. (-nodnod-)
Star-Of-Chaos: HA! I WAS RIGHT!! (-sings along with you-) I dunno...maybe we'll find out (-evil grin-)
Idiot Paranoia: Holly, just don't listen to anything XDDD (-cowers-) I'M SORRY!!! I'll miss you when I'm in camp Holls!
/o/
Zee: ...(-falls asleep whist writing-)
hide-chu: (-SIGH. Turns into the REAL hide and picks her up to drag her to bed. To you-) Please Review. Zee and I are gonna miss you all while we're at camp. And if Zee was awake, she's prolly wanna say something along the lines of "Have an awesome summer, bi-ACH!!!" Later. (-takes Zee to bed-)