Forgotten Tomorrow Ch 15

By Poet

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18 months ago......

Sirius was dead. That fact made painfully clear by the hordes of mourners present at Number 12 Grimauld Place. It made him sick. For so long had they condemned him as a murderer, deserving of Azkaban and the Dementers. Now though, their sympathy came in droves.

'That poor poor man. So much hardship and now this.'

'Poor Harry. His mother and father, and now his godfather. That boy has had enough trouble. It's no wonder he's going insane, speaking of Voldemort and his return. Who wouldn't be distraught by so much loss?'

Remus barely hid his contempt for the people idly filling the dusty house. Choosing instead to retreat into his room, case of fire whiskey in hand. She was the only one who noticed his absence. The only one who sought to comfort him. Her timid knock on the heavy door startled him from his grief.

"Remus?"

The silence following her words was deafening. Around him the world collapsed, held together by one last thread. Her hand touching his shocked him back to life. For a moment she was afraid. She had seen men become violent in their unexpressed grief, the simplest thing triggering outrage. His reaction surprised even him. Gently he reached for her hand and pulled her down beside him.

"Remus?"

"He's dead. James and Lily and now Sirius. I'm the last one alive." Unshed tears choked his words, making them into harsh whispers of grief. Hermione turned and pulled him into her arms. A heavy sadness settled across her as he willingly collapsed against her. Hot tears soaked through her shirt, burning the skin of her neck. His body, wracked by sobs shook against hers. Gently she tangled her fingers in his short hair, lips pressing against his ear to whisper softly.

"Everything you've loved has been so cruelly torn from you." Hermione moved her lips down, pressing them against his neck softly. She felt his arms wrap around her waist tightly, securing her there in a desperate effort to insure that she wouldn't leave him.

"Why did you come here?" His voice was still quiet, even in the silence of the room. Somehow it sounded broken. For a moment she thought about her answer. Playing her list of reasons over and over again in her mind. Trying to figure out the way to say it. With a harsh sigh she realized there was no real way to. Swallowing thickly, she stared out into the darkness.

"Because..I needed to be here. With you."

In his silence, her heart dropped. His grip around her had not lessened but it almost felt as if he had withdrawn from her completely. For several hesitant moments she wondered what to do next. It was him that made the move, but he did not pull away from her. Instead he picked her up in his arms as he stood. In the moonlight she saw the streaks marring his face, left by tears shed in anger and in grief. Reaching a hand to smooth down his cheek, she brushed away a salty trail.

Remus rested his forehead against hers for a moment, her presence comforting him more then any word could have. Then he took the few steps to his bed and settled her on it gently. The way in which he handled her bordered on reverent, as if he was afraid she too would break and fall away from him. Their eyes met in the glow of a single candle. For the first time he truly saw her. In a way he had denied himself for months now. And as she looked back at him, expectant and silent he saw the reflection of his own emotions there. 'Taking comfort in a child is condemnable. I am nothing if I accept what she is offering.'

"Remus. I offer only that which I gladly give to you." The hitch of fear in her voice brought a slight smile to his weary features. Sobering quickly as he took in her form laying on his bed.

"You offer the one thing I have wanted for so long Hermione. But taking it...I can't. I wont betray you. "

"Then consider it a gesture of comfort from a friend." As she spoke she sat up and pushed herself to the end of the bed. Once her feet touched the floor she stood before him. His hand came up to brush the hair from her face, reveling eyes set with determination.

"So beautiful." Those last words uttered, they moved as one. Lips connecting, sending a shiver through them both. Moving back, the bed soon reached out for them. Falling into it's embrace as they fell into each other.

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Present

Hermione's eyes snapped open. The dream, a memory really, had been reoccurring since Remus had returned to Hogwarts. Never had she regretted what had happened. Though part of her said it had merely been comfort, she knew that was a way to deny the pain of his rejection the next morning.

Now, half expecting him to be gone again when she turned, she swallowed the sense of dread as his arm snaked it's way around her waist. The feeling of lips pressing against her neck brought a smile and she turned to face him.

Remus smiled as Hermione turned to face him. Before she could speak he bent forward and kissed her gently. Then, pulling away he brushed a fingertip across her lips. Her mood change perceptibly and she withdrew a little. The range of emotions flashing across her eyes caught his attention.

"Why did you leave?"

Her question brought an unbidden sigh. The harsh quality intensified by sleep. Now, looking away from her in shame, he focused on the hollow of her throat. The same spot he had spent endless minutes fascinated with so long ago. His lips had found their way there so easily, coming to rest again and again. The memory of her laughter from a time so dark made everything become shockingly clear. For one night he had allowed himself to forget that it was inappropriate to be in love with her. Someone so much younger, so innocent. For a long time he believed he had stolen that innocence from her with his selfish search for comfort. In her arms he had found his comfort, willingly she had given it. And in return he had given her nothing but an already cold bed upon awakening.

"Because I had stolen something from you. And the shame, the guilt from that knowledge hounded me."

Daring to meet her eyes he was surprised by what he saw. Expecting anger when instead he was greeted by a sort of profound sorrow. She closed her eyes for a moment, unable to look at him. A lone tear escaped and traced down her face to the bed below. With a sharp sob she fell into his arms as he pulled her towards him.

"I thought you hated me for what I had done. For being selfish enough to love you and ask you for comfort when your best friend had died. I thought you were ashamed of being with me."

"No. Hermione look at me." When she refused he lifted her chin so he could look into her eyes. Placing a gentle kiss on each eye lid, he rested his forehead against hers. That gesture, so familiar made her look up at him. "For the longest time I told myself you didn't mean it. That you couldn't possibly have wanted it to go that far. You were a child, at least I tried to tell myself that. It was only in the months to come that I truly saw you for what you were. "

"Promise me it wont happen again." She sounded vulnerable now. Afraid of yet another 'no' from him.

"With everything I am Hermione. You've been the only thing that's right in all I've done. I could never give that up. Not now, not ever."

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18 months ago

Sunlight streamed in through the room. The light filling every corner of the room. But it was the cold that made her wake. Without looking she knew he had gone. Even last night she knew it would happen but she had still persisted. Now, lying there naked in his bed, already cold she cried tears of bitter grief. Not in regret for what she had done, but because she had driven him away. Turning, she found a note with a single rose sitting on the pillow beside her. Opening the piece of parchment carefully her eyes moved over the words scrawled in black ink.

Hermione,

I'm sorry. But if you ever have need of me, I will always be there.

Remus Lupin

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-And I can barely look at you

But every single time I do

I know we'll make it anywhere

Anyway from here

To think I might not see those eyes

Makes it so hard not to cry

And as we say our long good-bye

I nearly do-

Snow Patrol - Run

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The song inspired this chapter on the way home from work today. It is an effort to explain Hermione and Remus's(the elder) obvious closeness in the beginning of the chapter. Several people mentioned it was a bit weird to start off that way and truthfully I had never intended on explaining it. But..here you go.

As far as reviews go, I'm really interested in input on this chapter. If it's complete rubbish I promise to bin it and have a new one up within the week. But if its good, well then let me no.

Thanks

-Poet