A/n I wanted to spend some time to say thank you to all my reviewers' exceptionally Hell-babe who has stayed with my story through out it all! So thank you so please keep the feedback coming, it means a lot to me that people are actually reading this story.
I jump up, not even realizing what I'm doing, just knowing that I have to get up. Hopelessly trying to show I'm stronger then they all think, that I'm not this weak little girl that people picture inside their minds. I'm so much better then that, I cringe at how cold his eyes are. It's the last thing I remember as I find myself on the floor, I should learn by now not to linger on my thoughts while defending myself. Its my down fall, yet my savoir at the very same time.
I quickly get up, ignoring the throb in my head, as I wipe my emotions clean off my face, I high kick him in the head. Watching him stumble for a brief second I see him quickly regain his balance as he tries to kick my legs. I jump as I kick him, were it has to hurt, or else its just proof that he has nothing 'there' I shake my head. An Irrelevant thought to think about t right now, I tell myself as I see him bend down in pain.
I smirk, an evil smirk, I can hear myself saying something but Maria's high screams block her out of my head. I quickly turn around to see Maria bowling her eyes out.
"What are you doing Liz?" she cries, almost desperate to hear the answer.
I shrug, "its what I am," I say simply.
She shakes her head in dismay, "don't give me that crap! Your hurting Max! You're hurting him!" she screams, I look at her, anger rising inside my veins as I turn my head and ignore her.
I kick him hard in the chest, "you deserve it! YOU BASTARD!" i say as I kick him again, realizing that its not helping my pain inside. That I've already killed him and it didn't give back any of my sanity. I took away the only thing we had in common, our souls.
I turn around, to once again face Maria, 'what do you want from me' I say barley in a whisper.
She looks at me, with a puzzled expression, "nothing" she says simply, like she's mocking me, I nod my head as I turn back to Max, watching him get up while I just stand there.
"I'm... sorry..." I whisper so only he can hear it; he stares at me in hatred as I take a few steps back. I pull my hand up as a green shield protects Maria and myself; Max is now looking at me in astonishment as well as Maria.
"What's wrong with me!" he demands
I look at him, I shiver at how cold he sounded and how heartless he seems, the coldness in his eyes feel so empty. I regain control of my emotions as I take the shield down and throw Max on the other side of the pod chamber. He hits the edge of the rocks as I hear him sob in the distance, his now unconscious body lands on the floor with a loud thud.
I can hear Maria's loud screams, I turn to look at myself she has a satisfied smile on her face. "Now finish him!" she demands, I shake my head "we have more important things to deal with!" I reply dryly.
She gives me a cold hard stare as she speaks, "FINE! Then kill her!" she says as she looks at Maria. "I don't take orders," I whisper, not expecting her to hear me.
"You don't take orders, that's true but you do what I say! Because I am you, I am what helps you through the lonely nights, you need me! After all, no one else was there for you, were they? They all abandoned you! You are all you have!" she screams at me to listen to her.
"You weren't there for me either," I say hoarsely I look up to meet my eyes, which seem colder then Max's. "You weren't even there for me, I wasn't even there for myself!" I scream louder.
"IRONIC! Isn't it! No one was ever there for me! I didn't even have myself, how pathetic is that? I abandoned myself and I didn't even know it!" I scream, at the top of my lungs.
I feel like im...nothing, I mean nothing to myself.
I look down at my stomach, "you are all I have," I whisper, to myself.
"NO! you had me! You have me, stop being so blind! Can't you see that we are one! We can do so much more, then waste your life hiding away. Pretending that people actually care, that they really love you because they DON'T! No one does! Why can't you see that? We can rule the world, have people bend down and envy you for who you are. Your stronger then a vampire you're so much more! You're a slayer,and yetyour so much stronger then a slayer!"
Although, I don't bother to listen, I stare at Maria, as tears drip down my cheeks, for what seems like hours.
She doesn't even care; she is huddled close to Max, crying over him.
"Why did you hurt him!" she cries louder.
I stare at her, as my hair hangs down my face covering up any tearstains, which linger on my cheeks.
She looks at me; I can tell that she hates me that she doesn't want me to be here. "You're supposed to be dead! We were a lot happier until you came walking back! Until you rased from the dead!" She yells.
Im speechless, I'm amazed how much that hurt, "what do you want me to do? Do you think I chose to be this, this...thing, this dead person who hides in the shadows just like that man I hate, I despise so much does? And when I needed you, when I needed all of you, where were you, did you even help me? DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW I DIED? How I became this creature who feeds off blood. I never chose to be this but the worst part was, the people I needed the most wasn't even there for me you turned your backs on me. As if my opinions andmy thoughts didn't matter to you, Maria, your supposed to be my best friend...some friend" I say with tears running rapidly down my cheeks.
Her expression softens as I see her get up slowly and walk closer to me, as she tries to hug me. "No..." I whisper, "Get the hell away from me! Im NOT LIZ anymore! She died along time ago!" I turn my back on her for the last time as I walk swiftly away, out of the pod chamber and onto the dirt road.
I look up at the sky I feel the rain coming down onto my cold body, its washing away all the blood and dirt which has been untouched.
I look beside me as I just walk and find myself walking with me, "so what now" she asks angrily. "I'm going to kill the bastard who did this to me!"
"Oh come on you said that before! But what did you do, you turned weak and helpless just because of the other slayer, which happened to turned up!"
"Say what you want, I honestly couldn't care less bu tI'im going to kill him slowly and when he takes his lasted breath, I'm going to tell him about our little child, which is growing inside of me" I say to myself evilly, as I rub my stomach, trying to keep my child warm.
"Why even tell him?" she questions me.
"That's just like saying, why kill him, I want his last thoughts to be about how he wont ever see his precious child grow up and if I don't kill him, then the thought of that will" I say impatiently.
I'm walking in the nice cold rain, its washing away all the memorise which lingered to deep inside my mind. For once my memories are leaving me, even if it is for just a moment, its some sort of closure.
There are no lights and yet I can see perfectly well, although there is a little bit of fog, which is blocking some of my view, it's almost exciting.
"Do you even know were to find him? Or do you plain on just walking these streets all your life until you do?" she demands.
"Shut up! Do you have to question everything I do? I'm the one in control not you! This is my body and I will do what I like! NOW! Why the hell is Buffy in Roswell?" I demand. She looks at me; I can tell she's holding her tongue.
She sighs, "How am I supposed to know? I'm you remember!" she replies bitterly.
"That's bullshit, don't you dare fucken patronise me! I'm sick of people playing with my head, I know your not me! Don't ask how I know, I just do, so stopwith the crap and tell me why Buffy is in Roswell!" I demand just as bitterly.
She looks at me and then smiles, "I have to hand it to you, your not as dumb and naive as I thought you were, I'm impress"
"Are you going to tell me, or are you going to be the little manipulative bitch you really are?" I ask angrily.
"I will tell you the answers, if you kill the slayer," she replies as if it's that simple.
I look at the girl who I once thought was me, "why don't you do it yourself?" I ask impatiently.
"Do you want the answers, I know your desperate for them and don't try to deny it." She gives me a smile.
"Why does your form look like me?" I ask her angrily.
"I don't have to look like you" she smiles for a brief second and then her form changes.
I look at her, tears stinging my eyes, "hows this for you?" she questions with an amused tone. I shake my head, "Alex..." I choke out I can feel myself tremble.
He gives me an evil smile as he fades away into nothing.