A/n" Most of you will be disappointed with the ending, I am deeply sorry but I don't want a corny cliché ending... although those who have made it this far and are still reading this story, many thanks to all you lovely people for staying with this story until the very end and a special thank you to Ashley bell who has given me real criticism and I hope you don't stop with all your witty and smart ass comments, which are incredibly interesting to read, so once again thank you. And to all my other great reviews, I wouldn't write anymore if it weren't for all of you. And I love ya livi! AND THANK YOU TOO!
I swallow down the lump, which lingers in my throat, "I want my child to live" I whisper as I close my eyes. Tears reluctantly fell down my warm cheeks as I continuously remind myself that I'm doing the right thing. After all my life wouldn't be bliss if I constantly remind myself that my own child is perishing in hell because of my happiness.
"Is that your answer?" the voice asks me tiredly, I nod my head, not sure if he or it could see my gesture.
"Very well, although I must advise you, if you die for what ever reason you will perish in hell, your child however will go to heaven for your great sacrifice" he tells me sadly.
I shake my head, "Don't make me out to be a hero, please...your only going to make it harder for me to except reality" I whisper. Feeling the tears rapidly roll down my cheeks.
"You may ask me one question and I will answer it to the best of my ability" He tells me softy.
I stand there for a moment as I think through my question.
"You say my child is human yet why was it feeding off blood?" I ask with an edge of sadness.
"Your child is completely human" he replies.
"But that's not my question" I berate, trying to keep my cool.
I hear him sigh as he begins to talk, "Your child is completely human, your child wasn't feeding off blood, it was you who was doing so"
"Then why was my child telling me to feed?" I ask angrily.
"I have already answered your question, now are you ready to return home?" he asks, hearing an edge of sadness in his voice.
I shake my head, yet knowing that I wont ever be ready, I close my eyes as I slowly nod.
I feel my face, it feels moist as well as my hands, I slowly open my eyes, only to find myself on the floor, face down on the pavement.
I turn around; only to have the cold rain, as well as reality smack me in the face. I look up at the sky, the black, dark sky as I realise were I am, how can I not? I feel my neck with my hands, only to find that my hands are saturated with blood...my blood. I've been given a second chance and I don't understand why, for I have done terrible things to the ones I love so dearly...
I slowly get up from were I was lying. My eyes drift around at my surroundings as I soon see Buffy on, what looks like a large bin, holding a sharp, pointy weapon in front of her chest. I start to panic, not wanting to perish in hell, nor do I want my child to die and not once taste life.
'I'm going to make it through this' I keep telling myself. I follow Buffy's gaze, my eyes widen as I feel my blood boil. I see Max's unconscious form against the brick wall. For a slight second I thought he was dead, I sigh in relief as I see his chest moving in a rhythm.
I soon see Buffy staring at me in dismay as her eyes tear a whole right through me.
"I killed you!" she whispers among the loud crack of lightning followed by thunder. The lightning lightens up the city for a few seconds and then once again there is darkness.
I stand there for a moment, not knowing what to say or what to do.
"You cant kill the dead," I shout over the heavy rain, she looks down at me.
"Then why is Spike dead?" she berates angrily.
"Because he deserved it," I whisper, not sure if she heard me. From the look, which just crossed her face, she did, it almost leaves me with satisfaction if my heart didn't hurt so much.
"You don't know what you're talking about!" she spits as she clenches her weapon harder against her chest. I take a few steps back, "No, your delusional, you really think I don't know what I'm talking about? I guess your more naive then you look!"
"Because of you the slayer line is all fucked up!" she says as she points her crossbow towards me. "How the hell is it my fault?" I ask angrily as I hold onto the edge of my t-shirt, clenching it as hard as I can. My shirt is also soaked in blood.
"You did something to Spike" she screams, as she aims for my heart, were its supposed to be beating yet isn't.
"How can you blame it all on me? When your precious little Spike was the one who raped me! Who killed me! You think I asked for it?" I scream as I feel the rain pelt on my face.
"You don't know how it feels to loose the people you love! But your going to find out!" she scream as I see the crossbow aim towards Max's unconscious body.
Everything is in slow motion, I don't know what to do, I'm once again force to choose between the people I love. I hear the crossbow go off as it leaves its harmless position. It fly's through the air as if its dawdling, I leap in the air, towards my destination.
T b c
A/n: Please review, it would mean alot to me! and thank you for reading!