Disclaimer- I don't own the wonderful Oliver Wood, even though I wish he was MINE, or the rest of the Harry Potter gang.
The Quidditch Master
Chapter 6
I Love You, But I Can't Marry You
Katie opened the door to the twins' door cautiously. She gave a sigh of relief when nothing dropped on her head or popped out to scare her.
She took a close look at the room. The walls were painted red and gold, of course, and decorated with Quidditch posters, Gryffindor emblems, and pictures of family and friends. There were five beds lined up along the wall to her left, two of which had their hangings closed. An assortment of red and gold cushions was in a circle on the floor.
"Welcome to the Weasley Lair, milady," Fred greeted her.
"Correction, Weasley and Lee Jordan Lair," Lee shouted from the bathroom where he was digging in the cabinet under the sink.
"What are you doing, Lee?" Angelina asked from behind Katie.
"Getting our stash, of course," Fred replied while looking at Angelina like she was stupid,
Angelina rolled her eyes and shoved Katie out of the way.
Katie yelped in surprise before shouting, "Hey! What do you think you're doing?"
"You were holding up the line!" Angelina shouted back.
"Oh," Katie replied and walked and sat down on one of the empty beds.
"What do you think you're doing? You're supposed to sit on the floor!" George squealed.
"Thanks for telling me before I sat down," Katie replied and rolled her eyes. She got up and picked a red cushion before lying down on her stomach and propping her head up with the cushion.
"I present to you," Lee started and walked out of the bathroom with his arms full of Honeyduke's chocolate, "the famous Weasley and Lee Jordan stash!" He walked to the bed Katie had just vacated and opened his arms, letting all the chocolate cascade out of his arms like a waterfall.
"That is A LOT of chocolate," Oliver remarked.
"I know." Fred put his arm around Oliver's shoulder and pretended to sob, "Isn't it beautiful?"
"Yes," Oliver replied, also fake sobbing. "It's all grown up!"
"Guys, enough reminiscing about your chocolate's younger years," Katie grinned.
"Okay," Fred pretended to dry his eyes with his sleeve. "Everyone get in the circle of magical cushions!"
Angelina and Alicia sat down beside each other across from Katie. Fred sat down beside Angelina while his brother sprawled out on the floor beside Alicia. Andrea plopped down beside Katie and took her gold pillow and threw it at Katie, who in turn threw it at Oliver. Oliver clutched the pillow tightly to his chest and laid down in the empty space beside Katie. Lee quickly took the last spot left, in between Andrea and Fred.
"Now that everyone's situated," he announced in his Quidditch announcer voice, "The name of the game is 'I Love You, But I Can't Marry You' and now, for the rules. Say anything, but if you laugh first, you LOSE. Any questions before we play?"
"Lee, we all know how to play, so on with it already!" Fred exclaimed.
"Oh right," Lee took his wand out and mumbled something to transfigure one of the many pillows into a hat.
"Let me help you, Lee," Fred said and pulled out his own wand. "Accio parchment!" A piece of parchment shot out from under one of the beds and whizzed over to Fred. "Ta-da!"
"What are you guys doing?" Oliver asked suspiciously.
"We're going to write everyone's name on a slip of parchment and put them in the hat and then grab two names," Fred replied while looking around for a quill.
"You guys are idiots," Oliver said nonchalantly. "Why didn't you just get an empty bottle?"
"Because we're not playing spin the bottle..." Fred trailed off.
"Yeah, I know, BUT," Oliver paused, "you spin it and whoever it stops on is the person you play against."
"How come we didn't think of that?" the twins and Weasley asked in unison.
"It's all up here," Oliver tapped his forehead with his pointer finger.
"Not for you three, though," Andrea added with a smug grin.
"I'm going to pretend like I never heard that. Now, George, if you would please do us the honors," Fred thrust the hat at his brother.
"Of course," George replied as he transfigured the hat into an empty bottle.
"Bravo!" Katie called out and started clapping. Andrea and Oliver joined her in clapping.
"Simmer down, children," Lee said. "It was only a simple transfiguration."
"Simmering down," Katie muttered and stopped clapping, as did Oliver and Andrea.
"Since the bottle was your bright idea, you pick who goes first, dear Quidditch captain," Fred said and handed Oliver the bottle.
"Too kind, but," Oliver paused and grinned, "you should go first." He handed the bottle back to Fred.
"Okay," Fred grinned and placed the bottle in the middle of the circle and spun it. When it landed on Lee, he shuddered.
"Lee," Fred said quietly while placing his hand on top of Lee's outstretched one, "I love you, but I can't marry you because I caught you with Scabbers last night." After saying this, both he and Lee got disgusted looks.
"Well, I love you, too, Freddie dear, but," Lee began rubbing his thumb along Fred's, "I can't marry you because I have found myself a better man, George!"
Fred couldn't contain his laughter at the thought of Lee and his brother together. He ripped his hand off of Lee's and began chuckling.
"Out so soon?" Lee asked as the corner of his mouth twitched. Fred nodded in reply and continued laughing.
"I suppose I shall just spin this bottle and see if who the next loser is gonna be," Lee sighed and spun the bottle. It landed on Katie.
"Katie, the love of my life," Lee began and Katie glared at him," I love you but I can't marry you because you're with another man." He placed his hand over hers.
"Dearest Lee," Katie grinned wickedly, "I love you, but I can't marry you because you're with another man."
"That was a low blow," Lee commented.
"Don't worry. I'm only getting warmed up," Katie replied.
"If you say so. I love you, but I can't marry you because," Lee paused and scratched his head, "you're not a very good shag."
"Hey, I'm very offended by that! Well, Lee, I love you, but I can't marry you because," Katie gave an even more wicked grin than before, "yesterday, I found out that bestiality is illegal. And I really don't want to be thrown in Azkaban."
The corners of Lee's mouth began to twitch. "Yeah, well-"He cut himself off as a giant peal of laughter escaped his mouth. "Dammit!"
"Want some advice?" Katie asked with a huge grin.
"No, not really," Lee mumbled with a disappointed look. "By the way, I'm taking great offense from that bestiality comment."
"Next time don't get so darn cocky, and," Katie grimaced, "you set yourself up by saying that I was a bad shag!"
"Can I tell you secret?" Lee asked Katie and she shrugged. "I don't even know if you're a good shag. But I know someone who might. Cough, Cedric, cough."
"For your information Lee, you're supposed to actually cough," Katie informed him.
"Just spin the stupid bottle," Lee muttered.
"Okay," Katie replied and spun the bottle. It landed on Oliver and she grinned, thinking that it would be easy to beat him. "Ollie," she purred.
"Kates," he grinned and turned onto his side so that he was facing Katie and propped himself up on one elbow.
"Well," Katie paused to arrange herself the same way Oliver was, "you can start."
"Okay," Oliver grinned and took Katie's hand. He heard Katie's sharp intake of breath when their skin touched and tingled. "Katie Bell, I love you, but I can't marry you because you look too much like Fred."
"Hey! I heard that!" Fred shouted and shook his fist in the air at Oliver.
"Oliver, dearest," when Katie said this Oliver's heart leapt, even though he knew it was only a game, "I love you, but I can't marry you because incest is a crime."
"That's quite all right. You're mother only told you that I was your long lost brother from Scotland because she doesn't like me. Anyhow, my one and only true love, I love you, but I can't marry you because you're cheating on me with that man whore, Cedric."
Katie scowled. "Well Mr. Ollie Wood, I love you, but I can't marry you because you're already married to Quidditch and wouldn't notice me if I walked around starkers."
"Tisk, tisk, Katie dear. That was a very low blow. Believe me; it would be truly hard to miss you if you went around starkers."
"What are you trying to say?" Katie narrowed her eyes.
"Every guy in this bloody school would be following you around, drooling, if you went around starkers! You're bloody beautiful!"
Lee, Fred, and George murmured their agreement.
"Oh," Katie replied blushing. "I thought you mean something else..."
Oliver studied Katie for a few minutes before continuing with the game. "I love you, but I can't marry you because," he paused and looked at the ceiling before meeting Katie's eyes, "you won't play strip Quidditch with me anymore."
Katie gasped and turned a deep read. "Well, Ollie-Wollie," she gulped, "I love you, but I can't marry you because when I'm with you, I'm screwed worse than a hooker stuck with an ugly drunk."
Oliver scowled. "Well, Kate, I love you, but I can't marry you because you're a...a...a wretched shag!"
"Like you would know!" Katie growled.
"Well you were wretched in my dream last night!" Oliver shouted back without realizing what he had said, and when he realized what he said he turned a bright shade of red and slapped his hand over his mouth. He mumbled something incoherent before getting up and running out of the room.
Katie turned a deep red and stared after her fleeing captain. She shook her head and snapped out of her trance. "Did he just?"
All of her friends nodded in reply.
"But I can't, he's my best friend. And what about Cedric? I don't want to hurt his feelings..." Katie mumbled to herself before looking at everyone in the room. "I've, erm, got to go. Bye."
Once she was out of the room, Angelina looked at Fred and asked, "How long have you known he liked her?"
"Well, since this summer."
"Do enlighten us on this matter," Angelina said and Alicia and Andrea nodded their agreement.
"It all started this summer, when we were visiting Wood at his house. Katie was there, too. Oliver..."
Author's Note: Another chapter finished. Hope you guys liked it, even if it is somewhat of a cliffie. Remember, the more reviews I get, the quicker I'll update!
Thanks Blind-Sight, Kathy, Doodleflip, Katie, banana-princess93, Lia06, ilikeoliverwood, luvin-it, and IHopeForAnarchy
Blind-Sight- Nope, you don't count as ten people.
Banana-princess93- Ollie Wood is MINE! Back off, even though I would give him up for sexy Johnny. Speaking of Johnny, I hope everyone caught Oprah with him on November 1st!!
Lia06- Yes, she really does need to publish the half blood prince. I don't think the half blood prince is Ollie though (SOB!!), but he best be in the book. And the rest of the movies, as well. But if you need good reading material until then, try Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles series. It's great.
IHopeForAnarchy- I'm not trying to kill you, the process just comes, erm, naturally?? I love the game 'I love you, but I can't marry you!' Isn't it grand? If you're ever looking for a good laugh play, and use the bestiality is illegal one. It really offends people!!
-ilovecaptainjacks