A short little side story to 'What We Do With It'. Meant to be funny, yet is slightly disgusting at the same time. Eowyn once asked Crysta what indoor plumbing was. Well, here Crysta tries to explain. Made for my own amusement and, hopefully, for the amusement of others.
A Life Without Indoor Plumbing
Crysta and Eowyn walked side by side down a narrow dirt rode of Edoras, leading out of the city walls and then further away from the city. Crysta was wearing an old riding gown of Eowyn's, seeing that her own outfit was currently being washed. No one could figure out why, but Crysta refused to dispose of the strange outfit she was found in.
Neither of the two spoke for awhile, both knew where they were going, a private matter not worth discussing. Unfortunately, once again Crysta was going to be shot back to reality.
"Well, there you go, right around the corner up there and then back into the little dent in the side of the hill. I'll stay here and allow you some privacy," Eowyn pointed in the direction she was referring to.
"Just…out in the open?"
"Well, of course."
"Isn't that, like, unsanitary?"
"Of course not, everyone in Edoras goes here."
Crysta turned and starred in disbelief at the shield maiden. "Well, all the women anyways," was the only reply she received.
"But…why so far away from the city? Wouldn't you like have to run if it just, like, suddenly came over you?"
"Well yes, many a time you'll see people darting out of the city, and everyone knows to let them pass. And as for the distance, the stench is not something we would like to wake up to every morn."
Crysta starred in horror! Slowly, she turned and started in the direction Eowyn had told her to travel. As she neared the side of the hill, she could barely breathe. Taking a deep breathe of semi-clean air, she darted around the corner and did what she had to do.
She came back feeling relieved yet disgusted at the same time. How did these people live like this!!!! "You appear distraught."
"How do you live like this?!" Crysta blurted out before thinking.
"What do you mean?"
"You asked me what indoor plumbing was, 'member?"
"Ah, yes I recall that conversation."
"Well perhaps this would be a good time to explain it. One of the advantages of indoor plumbing besides having unlimited water whenever you want it, there is also a private place to…relieve yourself, and have it taken away, so the smell is never a problem and its much more comfortable and sanitary."
"But where does it all go?"
"Um…a bucket type of thing, and then you press a knob and water comes and flushes it all away through a series of pipes."
"But where would this contraption be?"
"In a separate room, probably near the room you sleep in."
"Why would you want that near your sleeping quarters?"
"Well, you see-"
"That's simply disgusting! It makes much more sense away from the city."
"But then it's just like piled up there!"
"Put piling it up near your bed?"
"NO! It gets 'flushed' away!"
"Whatever you say, the idea sounds revolting to me. Never fear, in time you too will see this was of doing things in much more practical."
Having said the last word, Eowyn walked a step ahead with her head held a little higher, while Crysta walked slowly behind, shaking her head all the way back into the city.
…End.
So leave a little comment. This isn't the most classy thing you'll ever read, and if your reading this before 'What We Do With It' please note that the real story is much more serious than this little story. This is just a crazy idea that popped into my head, and probably not correct in any way fact wise.So again, drop a note, good or bad, and…taataa!