Soul Searching

Author: Pumpkin Belly

A/N: I am sorry for the long wait. I have not forgot about the story I've just been busy with everything else in my life. Ok on to the story.

All the thing's he'll miss

"Spike, time to cut the turkey." Willow called from the kitchen.

"Coming." Spike called back, reluctantly giving little Aiden to Buffy.

"Smells delicious." Spike said wrapping his arms around Willow. His arms now fit all the way around her belly, which was no longer big from pregnancy.

"Spike, you don't even eat." Willow laughed leaning into his embrace.

"I eat," Spike, protested, "I just prefer blood to food."

Willow laughed again, turning around to face Spike. "I love you." She announced before reaching up to kiss him.

"I also like to eat you." Spike growled.

"Eww. Break it up you two." Xander gagged coming into the kitchen.

Willow pushed away from Spike and started pulling plates out of the cabinets.

"Xander a better greeting would have been 'Happy Thanksgiving'." Willow chided him.

"Well if I hadn't walked in on you two getting nasty in front of the turkey." Xander replied.

"So where's this turkey I'm suppose to be cutting?" Spike asked ignoring Xander.

"It's in the oven," Willow said, pointing her head in the direction of the oven.

Spike gave her a look that said I know where the oven is but didn't say anything. He strode over to the oven and pulled out the turkey, shouting from the pain of the burns he'd just received.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!" Spike exclaimed putting the turkey down on the center island.

"Should have used oven mitts," Xander pointed out.

"Thanks for that wonderful piece of advice." Spike said sarcastically.

"Anytime." Xander said, helping himself to some of the food that was sitting on the counter.

"Let me see, let me see." Willow said, taking hold of Spike's wrists and turning them so the palm of his hand faced her. "Ok, I think we should bandage this."

"Luv, I'm a vampire. I'll heal." Spike said. Willow, however, ignored him and went about bandaging his hands, "That was not necessary," Spike whined when Willow finished.

"Yes, it was." She said placing a delicate kiss on each of his hands. "All better."

"I'm not a little kid, pet." Spike said.

"Oh I know. You're a big boy." Willow said as if she was talking to a child.

"Damn right I am." Spike said pulling Willow against him. "A very big boy." He said before claiming her lips.

"Oh, come on guys. Can't you get a room?" Xander exclaimed.

"Well, since this is my house," Spike explained, "All these rooms are mine. So I have gotten a room."

Instead of replying Xander strode out of the room yelling "My eyes, my eyes."

Willow laughed before going back to collecting plates and bowls.

"Are you going to cut the turkey or should I get Giles to do it?" Willow asked.

"I'll cut the bloody bird. Don't need the librarian to take my job just cause the bloody oven burnt my hands." Spike muttered as he took a knife and started cutting the turkey.

"Thank you." Willow said before walking out of the kitchen to the dinning room.

"Oh god." Spike gasped, "No, no, no. Pet waked up. Red please wake up. I can't lose you. I just found you again." Panic rose in Spike's voice when Willow didn't stir. "Somebody help." He yelled from inside Willow's hospital room.

"Sir, move out of the way." A nurse said moving Spike away from Willow's bedside.

Spike felt numb. He slowly sat down in a chair in the corner of the room. He watched as the doctors rushed into Willow's room and began to work on her. Trying to determine the problem. Spike blocked out all the noise they were making. He concentrated on Willow's slowing heartbeat. He was going to lose her. He couldn't raise a baby all by himself. He needed Willow. He loved her.

The doctors wheeled Willow into the operating room as Spike sat in the corner, silently. He thought about all the things he would miss out on. And then he thought about his son and how Aiden would never know his mother. And he cried.

TBC

A/N: A little holiday treat. I'm hoping to have the next chapter out before next week. I'll have more time to write because of the holiday and the lack of school. As always reviews give me inspiration. PLEASE REVIEW. Happy Thanksgiving.