Disclaimer- We own nothing. We never will own anything. Try to sue and you'll just get a coupon for magical lollipop land, and the three pennies we've flipped to make decisions for our fics.

"Here's another one," said Harry, clicking on a story called Washing Windows. "Hmm…it says LE/SS…Lily Evans, Sorcerer's Stone?" He raised his eyebrows at the others. Hermione shrugged; Ron looked hesitant, after all Harry's Mom didn't have much to do with their first year.

Washing Windows

Lily Evans had always hated James Potter. She had despised him, even when they were dating, when they were married, and after young Harry was born. Her heart, which had been given away a long time ago, belonged to one person alone.

Severus Snape.

Harry let out a yell of fright and jumped away from the computer as if it had suddenly given him an electric shock. Ron's mouth was hanging open, and Hermione looked as if she was fighting a slight urge to giggle.

"That was horrid!" Harry cried. "Who would write something like…like that?!"

"An author of fanfiction," said Hermione with a sigh, now grinning. "Did I forget to mention that SS sometimes stands for Severus Snape? Hmm…let's try this story…Braids and Boils."

"Looks from the summary like two people wrote this one. I don't know Hermione; one author was enough, can we handle two?"

"We can try," answered Hermione. The trio read through the first chapter without a word. Their eyes darted back and forth, taking in the words on the page; Ron barely blinked. Finally, they each finished.

"See," said Hermione. "That wasn't bad. It was actually somewhat reminiscent of reality."

"Let's leave a review," Harry suggested.

Nice story…but is why does it end there?

"No, no," said Hermione. "They'll update and add a new chapter, that's how it works, not to mention that your grammar is horrible." Harry pressed the Backspace button

Good chapter, put up a new one soon!

"No!" snapped Hermione. "Look at the chapter bar, they've already got twelve chapters up! Besides, you should say update, not 'put up a new one'." Harry started over yet again.

This was a good chapter. I don't really know what else to say, my friend here is nagging me. ("I'm not nagging!") Have you read the story Strange Gazelle? That's completely random and so…strange! And so's the story Potter and Dursley; The greatest team ever. I ask you, if someone's going to write AU, why don't they write something good?

"Absolutely not," said Hermione, pushing Harry out of the chair. "There's something called a 'relevant review', Harry; yours is not one of them. Sidetracking in a fun way is all right, like when you said I was nagging you, but then you forgot about the story all together! Come on, let me show you two how it's done.

"Now, what do you like about the chapter?"

"I like that my brother Fred actually acts like my brother Fred," said Ron, nodding his head fervently.

"Yeah, same with Angelina," said Harry. "She's was exactly like the real thing!" Hermione deleted Harry's words and wrote:

This was a good chapter. Fred was very much IC, like the real Fred. Same for Angelina, a true replica of the real thing. I also think the wording was very good; my friend and I read this together and I'm reviewing on their behalf as well as mine because they have no idea how to.

"Hey!" said Ron.

"Well, it's true," Hermione muttered.

"Isn't that irrelevant, though?" Harry asked.

"Not exactly," said Hermione. "I'm still talking about the story in a way, and it's not like I'm using the review button to rant about another story! Lots of people do that, but to a certain extent it's ridiculous. Plus most authors appreciate good humor, they need it with all the flamers running around. Now, what else did you like?"

"The humor was good," Ron said slowly, so Hermione could type:

The humor was good in this as well.

"But they should add more," said Harry, catching on

Add more, it'll be better!

"That was good Harry! Constructive criticism actually helps the story. Is that it?" Hermione asked. Ron and Harry nodded. She pressed send.

"There," she said. "Now that, my friends, is how you write a proper review: stick to the topic and if you're going to sidetrack, come back, all right?"

"All right." Harry and Ron nodded in unison.

"Do you want to try one on your own?"

Harry and Ron nodded again getting really excited. Hermione sighed as though she were dealing with small children and once again went back to the Harry Potter story page.

"Now, what kind of story do you want to read next?"

Harry thought about it before thinking of a brilliant idea. "How about a story about Filch! I can't wait to see the way the people pound down that horrible man; do you think they know he is a squib?"

"Harry, fanfiction writers know everything."

"Okay then, this one looks interesting, and it doesn't have AU in the summary."

Wasted Pity

Filch waz a super cool dude. He really likeded to clean and stuff. Peoples at Hoggywarts hated him 'cause he was soooooooooo cool and they were alls jealouse.

"Wow. That was pathetic."

Hermione and Ron nodded in agreement. They couldn't even read past the first two sentences it was so horrific.

"Okay, I want to leave a review, because I know author's like reviews, but I don't want to be mean."

I think your story has promise.

"That's nice Harry, it will start off your review on a kind note. Recommend that they should get a beta reader."

"A what?"

"Someone who reads through their fic before they post it so that it doesn't have spelling errors and just looks better, it really helps a lot. Like how I read through your homework before you turn it in."

"That would be a good idea."

You should probably get a beta reader though so your story is

"Try more enjoyable, that way they think you enjoy it already."

more enjoyable. I think that writing about Filch is a nice angle though, not many stories like that. Your story needs a lot of improvement.

"Oh, be blunt Harry. Hey, tell them that it doesn't sound very British!"

One of the things you could try is making it sound more British, like your actually from Hogwarts. Good luck!

Harry pressed the send button and Hermione gave him a smile.

Just then Mrs. Granger's voice floated up from the kitchen. "Hermione! Ron! Harry! Supper's on the table!"

"Come on, let's go eat and then we can come back," Hermione said, turning off the monitor.

"NO!" cried Ron. The other two froze. "It's gone! It's dead! You killed it! We can't use it anymore, it's gone blank!"

"Ron," said Harry. "Ron. Ron! RON!" He finally grabbed his friend shoulder, and spoke slowly as though addressing a two-year old. "It's oh-kay. Her-my-oh-knee…just made the screen black. It's all still there. Calm down."

"I need food," said Ron, shaking his head.

For review response, as with Braids and Boils, I, desipoplover13 (possibly soon I shall be Quidditchmoke) will be in the bold print, and Tikvah Ariel takes the italics. I still don't like the name Quidditchmoke.

Sennica01- It really would've been useful. Seriously, if I had know to get a beta reader the first quarter of my first story would have been so much better. Thankfully, I didn't find out what slash was the way Harry and Ron had to. ::shiver:: I figured out what it was by reading summaries. Well, as you can see, we've added Severus Snape to this one, so that's done! Though that wasn't a pleasant way for Harry to find out.

Nikki Weasley 7393- We don't know if we'll use real stories, we'll have to see about that. Wouldn't want to offend anyone.Using our own was more okay to do because we're not in danger of messing with anyone else's, unless we have that whole Gollum/Smeagol Dissociative Identity Disorder thing going on. What challenge are you taking? There's a whole bunch out there, speaking of which I took yours. Well, good luck anyway.

Angelface04- Glad to make you laugh! Thanks for the compliments! Keep reading!

Venus725- Of course all D/Hr stories aren't that bad, unless your Hermione and you don't like Draco, we were just giving an example of an odd one that didn't involve feelings, just pointless snogging. Sadly, it's quite typical; hopefully no one's going to come after us with cans of whipped cream and giant spoons…That's an interesting scenario you cooked up for yourself. It wouldn't let you review chapter 12? I thought I was accepting anoyonmus reviews…

Review!!! You know how, or at least should after reading this chapter!! ::winks::