She's Out Of My Hands

Sean could feel his heart beating in his chest, his blood was running through his veins, his head pounding. His mind was rushing, full of all thoughts he never wanted to think again. He burst through the double doors of the hospital, scanning his surroundings as quickly as possible. Finally off in the distance he spotted Marco.

"Marco!" He screamed at the top of his lungs as he rushed towards him. He did not realize how loud he screamed until he caught up to Marco, and had to stop to catch his breath. His throat felt sore as if he had screamed too loud.

Marco turned around quickly as Sean stopped in front of him. Sean bent down, one hand wrapped around his waist as he felt his sides hurting. His breath caught in his throat, he had to shake his head to calm himself down. Finally after a few seconds of heavy breathing he managed to stand up straight again.

"Wh-Where is she? Is she awake? I need to see her-" Sean said as he did not give Marco a chance to answer any of his questions, instead he pushed past him and headed for the first door he could see. He swung open the door, preparing himself to see Ellie laying there as still as a board.

"Ellie-" He froze as he looked around the room. The room was dark, the only sound he could hear was the beeping of the monitor, the only light coming from the window beside the bed. As he stepped further into the room, preparing himself to say something, anything.

As Sean took another step into the room he felt as a hand from behind grabbed the hood of his sweatshirt and tried to drag him out of the room. Sean almost collapsed as the hand attempted to drag him out, but clearly they were not strong enough. He pushed the hand off him as he turned around to see Marco.

Sean took one more glance into the room before following Marco out in the hallway, closing the door behind him.

"What are you doing?!" Marco yelled at him.

"I need to see her!" Sean screamed back.

"Then try going in the right room next time!" Marco said as he motioned to the room two doors down.

"Right room.." Sean repeated. He turned around as he walked over to the door of the room he was just inside. For the first time he noticed that there was a name on the door. Christina Hopkinton. Sean turned around as he felt himself calming down a little bit.

"Oh. Yeah." He said softly.

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Her throat was dry, and chalky. Her hands were shaking, she was cold. She felt as if she had not eaten anything in days. Her stomach was hurting her and she could not decide weather it was because she was hungry, or because of the loss of blood. Whatever it was, she just hoped it would go away soon.

She took several calm, soothing breaths before opening her eyes for the first time in hours. Ellie scanned the room. The white walls, white sheets, the dim light from the lamp beside her bed, the numerous machines all around the room, as well as the one machine that was pumping blood into her arm. She looked down at the arm she had cut hours ago. Placing her hand over the white cloth that was now wrapped around it. It was still tender around that area, and with each touch she felt her stomach growling.

She looked to her right and for the first time she got a good glimpse of the figure sleeping in the small uncomfortable chair beside her. Emma Nelson? The sight of her confused Ellie, why is she here?

Emma shifted in her seat, as her head moved from her shoulder to the table beside her, a few seconds later her head slid down to the table and hit against it lightly, causing Emma to stir in her sleep even more, only this time it woke her.

Emma lifted her head, placing her hand around to where she slammed it. "Ouch." she mumbled under her breath, her eyes still closed.

"Emma.." Ellie whispered.

Emma opened her eyes as she saw Ellie pushing herself to a sitting position. She looked slightly shocked but then slowly gave Ellie a forced smile.

"Hey. How are you feeling?" Emma asked her.

"Yo-You were the one..the voice I heard when I ... you found me..." Ellie said to her. While she was laying on the ground, the blood pouring from the scar on her arm she heard a faint voice. A girls voice she knew, but she just assumed it was Ashley's, but apparently she was wrong.

"You scared me...All of us." Emma responded.

"How..How long have I been here?" Ellie asked her.

"About five hours. We've just been waiting for you to wake up." Emma said.

"Thanks..for..calling and saving my life." Ellie said to her.

"Ellie why would you do that to yourself?" Emma asked as her eyes wandered down to the bandage on her arm.

Ellie could give Emma the same answer she has given everyone else in the past, everyone who asked her that exact same question. Because it was the only pain I could control. Which is true, but not in this case. No, this time a tiny part of her was glade when she hit the ground, a tiny part of her was waiting for that moment to hit, the moment when she would be free from all of the pain and emptiness inside of her, the moment when she would no longer have to feel as if she was going to be alone for the rest of her life.

But not today, no now she does not want to give Emma the false answer that she would give to everyone else, today she does not want to tell Emma that she wanted to die. No..she does not want to tell her anything.

"Did they say when I can go home?" Ellie asked, changing the subject.

"I don't think today." Emma said.

Ellie felt a wave of dissapointment wash over her, but only for a moment as the realization hit her. If she were to go home to that empty house she once shared with Sean, she would be forced to spend the entire evening alone with nothing but the temptation, and the overwhelming pain inside of her...to keep her company.

She pushed herself back down in the bed, preparing herself to close her eyes when she made the mistake of taking one final glance at the door. Ellie could have sworn she felt her jaw drop and her heart hit the floor when she spotted him standing there.

His hair was messy and his eyes were bloodshot, he looked as if he had not slept in days. He was leaning against the doorframe in silence, wearing the same gray sweatshirt he has always worn, no hat this time which for some reason was a slight shock to Ellie.

Emma must have noticed her jaw drop as she too turned around and followed Ellie's frozen gaze.

Sean looked at the two girls, his face twisted in confusion. He clearly seemed surpirsed to see his current..well...whatever Ellie was to him, and his ex girlfriend sitting alone together in a room in a civil conversation.

Sean pushed himself away from the door frame as he slowly took a step into the room. Taking a deep breath he shoved both his hands deep into the pockets of his sweatshirt. He shot the two girls a slight smile, or a slight attempt at a smile.

Ellie again pushed herself to a sitting position as Emma stood from her seat, and stepped up beside Ellie, almost as if she was in a protective state.

"Marco called me." Sean said softly as he took another several steps into the room.

"I just..I came as soon as I could..." He stepped up to the foot of the bed, Emma crossed her arms over chest protectivly, while Ellie just continued to glare at him.

She never would have thought she would see Sean standing here, in her room. Especially knowing now that the whole reason he came back was because he heard about what happened to her.

"You shouldn't be here." Ellie said to him softly, glaring at him.

"I know I just..I wanted to make sure you're ok." he said.

"You made sure. She's fine. Now go." Emma snapped.

"Emma..don't." Sean said as he looked at her. "Can you..can you please leave us alone?" Sean asked her.

Emma looked down at Ellie, as she waited to hear what she would say.

"Can you?" Ellie asked Sean.

"What? Ellie I just want to talk." Sean said to her.

"She said go." Emma interrupted.

"Emma this isn't about you!" Sean snapped as he turned and yelled at her.

"No it isn't about me. And it isn't about you either. This is about Ellie. And she wants you to leave so just leave." Emma said as she pushed herself away from the wall she had been leaning against and took a forced step forward.

"You know what, Emma. For the first time can you just take a hint and butt out of other peoples business?" Sean asked her.

"Why can't you take a hint and leave? She asked you too so just do it." Emma insisted.

"You know-"

"BOTH OF YOU!" Ellie shouted.

Both Emma and Sean turned to her, as Ellie put her hand around her throat. She didn't realize it would hurt so much to yell like that. But now her throat hurt and she felt even more light headed then before.

"Can you both just leave? Please." She insisted. A tear glistering in the corner of her eye.

"Sorry. I'll see you later." Emma whispered as she gave Ellie a slight smile, shooting Sean one final cold stare before she exited the room.

"Ellie..." Sean started.

"Sean. I mean it." Ellie insisted.

"Fine. But I'm not leaving. I'll be in the hall." Sean said to her as he turned and headed for the door.

Ellie watched as Sean walked out into the hall, closing her eyes she fought back the tears in her eyes as she laid back down on the bed. Wishing this day has never happened.