A/N: Thanks you guys, I'm glad you are finding this to be funny! I hoped you would!! All the things you can think of when you have a huge bag of MnMs!
MoonGopher: I respect you for coming and saying your sorry, but I am glad you like this story.
Disclaimer: Use your common sense.....and if you sue me anyway, I'll laugh in your face, HA HA! See here, I just did....
Lily slammed her lunch tray with a definite motion down on the cafeteria table. Ray jumped up in his seat, not prepared for her violent arrival. Travis hadn't even flinched and now rolled his eyes, exasperated."You know, doing that will not change anything...." Travis commented.
"I know, I know.." Lily answered darkly. She yanked the chair back with a squeak and collapsed down in it. She glared silently down at her salad and apple on her lunch tray, clearly thinking of something besides lunch. Travis noticed this and chuckled softly to himself while he twirled his noodles with his pair of chopsticks.
"If you keep that rough attitude up, the men are going to have a reason to throw you out...."
"That's exactly why I'm so pissed off!" Lily nearly screamed. She clenched her fists in a frustrated way and banged them on the table. Ray frantically grabbed his can of soda, preventing it from tipping over. "Why are those people here?! It's making this school a living hell!" Some other students sitting nearby took curious glances of her before going back to their regular conversations. Lily started taking deep breaths, calming her nerves. Then with a deep sigh she leaned her head against her hand.
"Well, it sounds like you have been having a super fine day." Travis said sarcastically as Lily rolled her eyes.
"Yeah, it's been wonderful...." Lily replied absentmindedly as she gazed around the cafeteria. The men were everywhere, patrolling everything. Every few seconds, one would lean over and to speak to one of the students, no doubt asking them personal questions. Out in the hallways in between classes, they were all in the hall making sure everything was right, or at least right to them. Travis noticed what Lily's was looking at and his mouth formed a thing line.
"They've been doing that all day. There has been at least one of them following me to each of my classes this morning..." Travis nods his head at Lily's questioning look. "I must have really irked their leader earlier today, because I can't shake any of them off."
"Ray, what on earth are you doing?" Lily asked. She had heard Ray cursing under his breath and he was now looking angrily over his hot lunch from the kitchen. Ray had his plastic fork gripped tightly and was jabbing the meat to its second death....
"I can't cut it....." Ray muttered, directing his angry tone of voice towards his lunch.
"Seriously Ray," Lily began "for our ear's sake, use a plastic knife. That's what it was made for, a pretty useful invention they made awhile ago....."
"I would use it..." Ray snapped "If they had it available...." Before Lily could ask what he meant, Ray held up his fork and spoon, the items he was desperately trying to cut the meat with. "They took the whole self- mutilation thing seriously....they got rid of all the knife utensils in the school." Lily and Travis both showed faces of full disbelief.
"B-but, they're all plastic.." Lily said, after a few seconds of finding her voice. "They can't do any real damage..." Travis just looked at the utensils, with the lack of a proper knife in utter bewilderment.
"I know, try telling them that." Ray said before going back to destroying his piece of meat, not really even trying to cut it properly. At least if it was in shreds you would be able to eat it.
"Alright, you know the new rules, come on you're going back to where you came from!" A gruff voice called out. Lily, Travis, and Ray turned to see who the voice belonged too. One of the men was leading a group of unusual students to the exit of the cafeteria, with a bunch of the other men forcing them from behind.
"But, we came here to get a rightful education!" A girl with a British accent shouted out. She was wearing a long black robe and had abnormally brown bushy hair. "You can't just kick us out!" The man just put his hands on his hips and laughed at her attack.
"You, little pretentious know it all, will do what the rules ask of you to do. Bob, where are the others?" Right on cue another man was leading a group of 3 people, or creatures actually, that were wearing long black cloaks. Where you should have seen their faces, there was just blackness. They clunked across the cafeteria, following the man, about to join the group.
Suddenly a boy with dark messy hair, and a lightning bolt birthmark on his forehead, who was standing next to the outspoken girl, fearfully yanked out a 12 inch stick. With it, he pointed straight at the oncoming cloaked figures, apparently it looked like he was going to try to poke their non- existent eyes out, but then little white sparkles started coming out from the tip.
"Oooooo." The Roscoe student onlookers said. "Aaaaaaaaaaaa"
"Expectro-"
"Expelliarmus!" The girl had taken out her own stick and the boy's stick went flying to her other hand. She quickly pocketed them both and glared at the boy. "Harry, what on earth are you thinking?! Those aren't dementors, you didn't hear your dead mum screaming did you?"
"Er....no..."
"Exactly, there're Ring Wraiths!"
"Ring Wraiths? What in the bloody hell are those?" asked a boy with bright red hair, wearing the same long black robes as the other two. Harry just stared at her with a bewildered look on.
"They're-just-evil-servants-of-the-Dark-Lord-Sauron-that-will-kill-anyone- that-gets-in their-way-to-achieve-their-one-goal-to-bring-the-One-Ring-back- to-their-master-so-he-can-destroy-Middle-Earth." The girl recited all in one breath matter-of-factly. When they still showed no signs of understanding, she sighs then added. "Seriously, don't you two ever read?"
"Bloody brilliant!" The tall lanky boy with red hair cried out for no apparent reason at all.
"Thank you little girl, we couldn't of said it better ourselves." One of the Ring Wraiths spoke up. He his voice was deep and raspy, even though his voice is supposed to be high pitched and eerie, and make no sense at all. The tall creature turned to Ron and continued. "We are just here to further our education so we can perform out our evil plans to their full extent.
"See, they aren't here to harm you Harry!" The girl said briskly, even though she couldn't have really listened to what was said. Ron took a couple of back steps away from the three creatures, not looking entirely convinced.
"Oh...okay." Harry said uncertainly, taking a couple of steps away from the creatures as well.
"Is story time over?" The man barked. "Because you are leaving NOW!" As he said this, him and a couple of others herded the unusual group through the cafeteria doors. One of them behind was pulling a little boy along, who was desperately trying to dig his feet into the ground.
"Come on, you 'foreign exchange student', you are going back to....." He looked over the sandy colored hair boy who was wearing an outfit made out of dirty rough fabric. "Well, where ever you are from....."
"I'm a person, and my name is Aniken!" The little boy shot at him defensively.
"That's the spirit!" A toga man shouted out from the hallway, while being dragged away.
"Does it look like I care? All I care about it that you are a crossover, and crossovers aren't allowed at Roscoe!" With one swift movement, Aniken was yanked right out in the hallway, and none of them were seen again.
Lily was the first to return her gaze to the table, then following her lead, so did Ray and Travis. First, they all blankly stared at each other, a little puzzled about the scene that they just saw. Ray had bits of shredded meat hanging slightly out of his mouth, and Lily just stared, considering telling Ray to close his mouth while he was eating, but then decided against it.
"What was that about?" Lily asked, breaking the silence that had formed over the table. The rest of Roscoe students had also now gotten over the shock of what they just saw, and now were chatting among themselves.
"Well, it seems like they are trying to get rid of the exchange students aka crossovers...."
"And they would do that because....?"
"It isn't allowed by their rules....." Travis said simply.
"That's pathetic." Lily began. "All of this is pathetic! The only thing I am happy about them doing is getting rid of that Mary Sue..." Ray gave out a stifled whimper. "Yes, Ray I said Mary Sue..." Lily said the name as if it caused a foul taste in her mouth while she gave Ray an evil glare, which shut him right up.
"Actually, getting rid of that bushy haired girl and her friends wasn't so bad either..." Travis added casually as he poked at his noodles with his chopsticks. "Every time they went to get their books from their lockers, instead of unlocking their lockers normally....they would take those wooden sticks of theirs, twirl them around a bit, and say Alhorama!..." He said with a wave of his chopstick. "Or at least something like that...."
"Yeah, and those weird cloaked things would jump after anything that was shiny." Ray said with a shake of his head. "Boy, it was really distracting during classes.."
Lily gave out an unlady-like snort. "Yeah, like you pay attention during classes in the first place...."
"Hey you guys." Robbie said while he made his way towards their table. They all turned to his direction and gaped at him.
"Robbie, where have you been?" Lily asked curiously as Robbie pulled out a chair and sat himself down in it. "And what are all those band aids on your arms?"
"These?" He asked motioning to the two on his arm. "Those 'men' did DNA testing on me!"
"DNA testing?" Travis asked, looking just as confused as Lily and Ray did. "What for?"
"To see if I was related to someone...."
"Who on earth would you be related too? I thought you were an only child!" Ray said. "You lied, you have had siblings all along!"
"No Ray, I don't have siblings..." Robbie said, and Ray gave out a sigh of relief, but Lily grabbed Robbie and examined the band aid marks.
"Robbie, who could they have thought you were possible related too...." Travis asked.
"Kim Carlile..." Robbie said sheepishly, while pulling his arm out of Lily's grasp. As if something clicked in her head, she put on and understanding face as her mouth turned into the shape of and 'o'. Ray looked from the both of them, confused.
"I still don't get it...." Ray said softly to himself. Travis opened his mouth to ask more, but Robbie cut him off.
"Well, anyway," Robbie started, trying frantically to change the subject. "they also kept asking Kim all these questions about if her dad abused her and stuff-"
"God bless you!" And elderly woman's soft voice called out, and the RFR gang found themselves sprinkled all over with water droplets. The elderly woman smiled at them all before turning to bless the table next to theirs in the Hold Water that she was carrying in a little bottle. Lily, in one swift movement, wiped the droplets from her eye lids. Ray was looking down at his lunch, that was now wet on the surface.
"I can't believe this, it's like these people are trying to make our school a perfect place!"
"No, shit Sherlock." A low gruff voice commented. The gang looked up to see the little old woman with the water back, standing over them. She cleared her throat and began speaking again in a high pitched voice again. "Dear," She said in a sweet voice directed to Robbie, who had his mouth hanging open. "Can I borrow some of the water you have?" Robbie shook his shocked look of his face and handed the lady his water bottle.
"Er...here you go..."
"Thank you, dearie." The old lady filled her little bottle up then handed back Robbie's water. Then without another word she walked away, flinging water at the other tables of students. The gang just sat there staring after her, each with a rather frightened look on their faces.
"We have to do something about this.." Travis whispered. Lily turned to him with a smile on her face.
"You thinking what I'm thinking?" Lily asked quietly.
"Today.....it's RFR pay back time." Travis stated with pride while shaking his fist. They all high-fived each other grinning from ear to ear.
"Yeah, let's do this!" Robbie said enthusiastically. Suddenly, a man wearing a toga got up from under their table and gave them a thumbs up sign.
"That's the spirit!" He shouted.
"Lily," Ray said. "Where did he come from?"
A/N: I know...slightly on the wacky side. But the toga man will come to your house if you don't review! Mwhahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...no, really, please review.
Ps: The thing with the Holy Water is not to be meant insulting!!! It's just that this priest at my school does it all the time,...so I thought it would be funny.( not the shit part though.)