Family Guy
Alien Overload
Opening credits.
Peter, Meg, Chris & Brian are watching "Thunderbirds". The puppets on there are badly made and the strings are really obvious.
Gordon: My God Alan.
Alan: What Gordon?
Gordon: I've just realized you're just a crappy puppet.
Alan: Yes, we maybe crappy puppets but puppets are puppets.
Scott turns around, with a every weird walk.
Scott: Could you say puppet anymore?
Alan: Guys we're supposed to be on a mission.
Scott: bleep off wanker.
Chris: Ha-ha-ha. Wanker.
Peter: I never knew wanker was a word 'till that trip to England.
Flashback. Peter and the rest on standing while a guy with big teeth and ugly hair talking to them.
Englishman: And you'll enjoy Prince William. Boy, his a wanker that's for sure. You know, they couldn't be anymore mentioning of the word "wanker". Have you watched that show Allo' Allo'? Boy, that's a wanker of a show I tell you now. You know who else is a wanker...Tony Blair, I mean....we already have a Queen why the Hell do we need a Prime Minister? You see.
Stewie: Now, now. You see here! You need Tony Blair, it's not like there's going to be a Queen forever. Right after, I assassinate her of course. Tony Blair is doing this country a hella lot of good. Without him, you'll be dead by now.
The Englishman kneels down in front of Stewie.
Englishman: What a fine wanker, is this your son? Yes, his quite a wanker.
Back to present. Lois enters with baby custard.
Lois: Where's Stewie? His custard's ready!
Brian: I think his up in his room.
Stewie's room. Stewie is typing up on the computer.
Stewie: Yes, yes. I say Rupert, what should I say to the message to the alien life forms?
Picture of Rupert.
Stewie: Dear Aliens, this is U. R Gay? Blast! That's it Rupert.
Stewie bends Rupert and starts spanking him.
Stewie: Yes, Rupert. You've been a naughty boy. Or should I say dirty. You filthy, filthy, filthy stuffed teddy bear!
Stewie stops. Stewie then goes back to his computer.
Stewie: Let's see here. Dear Aliens, this is future ruler of the world speaking to you. I send this letter now because I need assistance because of my appearance. I offer the blood of a red-haired hag. If this is not enough for you; I promise you….gratuitous alien pornography. Signed Stewart Griffin.
Stewie presses the "ENTER" key.
Lois: (V.O): Stewie, your custard is ready!
Stewie: Oooh, ever since I saw the Teletubbies, I despise custard.
Stewie grabs a laser gun.
Stewie: I'll be right down mother!
Stewie walks down the stairs, walks down to the lounge and starts firing the laser gun. Missing Lois by 1 millimeter.
Lois: Stewie, that's a bad baby, bad baby.
Lois snatches the laser gun off him. Lois hands him the custard.
Lois: Here you go.
Stewie looks at the custard.
Stewie: What are you looking at?
Lois: Eat up; dinner won't be ready until six.
Lois leaves the room. Stewie walks over to Brian with the custard.
Stewie: Here, you have it.
Stewie dumps the custard on Brian's head. Brian has a taste.
Brian: Mm…Lemony.
Brian leaves.
Stewie: Now, I wonder if the aliens got my transmission.
Stewie runs up to his room.
Peter: I remember when I was abducted by aliens….
Flashback. Cut to a spaceship, Peter is lying on the table while Scott Baio is giving him an anal probe.
Peter: So, ah? You're an alien, huh?
Scott Baio: No. I just joined the alien elite because well my acting career was really going anywhere so, I decided to you know...change teams.
Peter: Oh, so you're gay.
Scott Baio: No.
Peter: Yeah, I really like you in Diagnosis Murder. Yeah, Dick Van Dyke could do anything.
Back to present.
Brian: Peter, that never happened. That was just a dream.
Peter: Then how come Scott Baio gave me anal probe insurance?
Brian: That salesman who sold you volcano insurance gave you that.
Peter: Oh, then what's up with this 80 foot satellite sticking out of my ass.
Move over to reveal the satellite spying on Meg.
Meg: This thing is freaky.
Peter: Explain yourself now Mr. Smart Dog.
Brian: Peter, that's a cable satellite that got impaled on your ass.
Peter: Then how come I keep hearing voices saying: "Help us, we can't breathe" and "There's Lois, heh, heh… alright".
Brian pulls Cleveland and Quagmire out of his ass covered in shit.
Peter: (shocked): Cleveland, Quagmire. Your aliens! My God!
Brian slaps himself on the forehead.
Cut to Stewie's room. His browsing on the computer.
Stewie: Still no alien message. Oh well. I'll try looking up
Stewie types it up on the internet.
Stewie: Oh what's this, an new alien video. What could this be?
Stewie clicks on the link to the video.
Stewie: Oh download QuickTime. Yadda, yadda, yadda. Okay.
A box is coming up, downloading QuickTime.
Stewie: Hurry up.
The box then says: "Download complete. Click on the "START" button to play video".
Stewie: Oh how time flys. Okay, click.
Cut to an X-Files style alien in a spaceship.
Alien: Hello, my name is Cronker Matitee. I recorded this video so I can warn fellow earthlings that I will enslave this place called Quahog. As a little infant sent me a letter, it has convinced me to dominate the world, but mostly Quahog at this other place known as Rhode Island.
Stewie: What are you saying?
Close up on Cronker.
Cronker: I will enslave your hometown you idiot!
Stewie: Oh, yes. Yes, that's nice. Enslave my hometown, now that's a start. And I'll be your comrade.
Cronker: No, I'll enslave you as well as enslave that red-haired hag you were talking about.
Dramatic chord.
Stewie: Yes, I rather like you enslaving Lois but enslaving me. Well, that's a different story….I'M F#ING BLOODY PISSED OFF!
End of Act One.
Act Two
Cut to the kitchen. Stewie, Lois, Peter, Brian, Chris & Meg are having dinner while watching the news.
Tom Tucker: And the latest crackdown in drugs has resulted in a Plan Z style lawsuit. Here's the alleged drug dealer now with Asian reporter Trisha Tuckanwa. Trisha.
Cut to an abandoned warehouse. Trisha is with Danger Mouse.
Trisha: Thank you Tom, Mr. Mouse what has made you file a lawsuit against the Quahog police force?
Danger Mouse: Well first Trisha, I would like to say hi to my friends, Mickey & Minnie Mouse. Hi, and also I'm pissed as Hell people think I was smuggling drugs into flowers and also dealing drugs. I am NOT dealing drugs.
Trisha: What about smuggling the drugs?
Danger Mouse: That story is true; I mean if you sniff that cocaine you'll have powers. People deserve the powers I have, and the source of my powers is the cocaine I was snorting from flowers.
Trisha: Back to you Tom.
Cut back to the studio. Diane and Tom are making out, then look at the camera shocked and stop.
Lois: My God, smuggling drugs. How does an innocent mouse do something like that?
Peter: Hey Lois, that isn't any worse than that telemarketing scam I was doing last week.
Flashback. Peter is on the phone.
Peter: Hello Mr. Focker, how would you like to be generous person. Just give you and the Mrs. money to me, a defenseless hobo….
Peter redials.
Peter: Hey, Bernie. We got cut off…
Peter redials.
Back to present. At the news studio, it's focusing on Diane.
Diane: In our next story. An Alien has been spotted at a Sc-Fi convention.
The camera then goes to a nerd in an Alien mask. Cut back to Tom and Diane.
Diane: Tom.
Tom: Suspicions of aliens arose when a video on the internet involving an alien known as "Cronker Matitee" said he will enslave all of Quahog.
A bright green light shines on Tom and he disappears and the bright light tries to reach to Diane.
Diane: AAAAHGGH! HELP ME! I'M FAMOUS!
She also disappears. Cut back to the kitchen.
Lois: Oh my God, enslave of all Quahog. Peter, what we will do?
Peter: I've got the perfect plan.
Pause.
Brian: What's the plan?
Peter: I don't know.
Meg: Oh my God, if an alien abducted me, my life will just get weirder.
Chris: That's the spirit, hahahahaha.
Meg: Oh Chris, I think I hear your evil monkey coming.
Chris: WHAT?!?!
Chris runs to his room, and finds the evil monkey sneaking out. The monkey then looks at him, and then points at him, along with evil music sting accompanied.
Chris: Glad, that's over.
Chris looks at Buff Bagwell stabbed with several knifes.
Chris: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! WHEN WILL THE KILLING END?!?!
The Drunken Clam. Peter, Quagmire, Cleveland & Joe are drinking, chatting, you know…hanging out.
Joe: And it appeared Jennifer Hawkins dipped mind control pills into the judges' wine and that's how she won. Using mind control.
Quagmire: How dare you arrest Miss Universe?
Quagmire punches Joe. Joe then gets the handcuffs out.
Joe: Punching a police officer is a federal offense.
Joe then handcuffs him.
Quagmire: Aaah, crap. I haven't even finished my beer yet.
Joe grabs out a bendy-straw.
Joe: Here's a straw you could use.
Joe drops the straw in the beer, and then Quagmire starts sucking through it.
Quagmire: (stops sucking): Thanks bud. (continues sucking)
Peter: Oh, you guys hear about that aliens might enslave us.
Pause.
Peter: It was on the news.
Cleveland: Nope.
Joe: Nope.
Quagmire: Yep.
Cleveland and Joe stare at him.
Quagmire: I watched it on the Naked News, heh heh. Alright.
Peter, Cleveland & Joe stare at him.
Quagmire: The female version.
Peter, Cleveland & Joe: Oooooh.
Peter: When you put it that way.
Quagmire: Did you guys think I was gay?
Pause.
Peter: Yeah, and I don't know how to protect my family. I need your help you guys, incase there is going to be an invasion.
Cleveland: Well Peter, you could rent out a tractor-beam proof shelter down the road.
Joe: Or we could kill all the aliens.
Quagmire: Or we could dump nuclear waste on their spaceship.
An alien walks in.
Alien: Two beers, and don't skip on the (reads from card) al-key-hole.
Bartender: Two beers with alcohol in them coming right up.
Peter: So, are you an alien?
Alien: Me alien, I'm a human.
Joe: No your not, you have green skin.
Alien: That guy other has yellow skin (points to Homer Simpson), but you don't accuse him to be an alien.
Homer Simpson: Hi.
Alien: Okay, I'm an alien. But so you won't talk, I'll have to send the Daleks in here.
Robots slide in the bar.
Robots: Exterminate, exterminate, exterminate, exterminate.
Alien: I'm from Rigel 7, now I'll have to speak in my own language.
Alien walks over to a woman.
Alien: Moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo (Hey, gorgeous want to go out on a date?)
Woman: AAAAAGGGGGHH! A half alien/half cow hybrid!
She sprays the alien with mace.
Alien: Moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo (Those eye juices are delicious)
Alien pulls his finger upwards. Cut to a spaceship above The Drunken Clam.
Alien #2: Sir, there's the signal.
Cronker: Thank you, Ku Lu Poo Gee Gee Fus Mini Me Gee Gee Romper Stomper Cromper.
Ku Lu Poo Gee Gee Fus Mini Me Gee Gee Romper Stomper Cromper: Shall I press the button sir?
Cronker: Certainly, Ku Lu Poo Gee Gee Fus.
He presses the button which engages the tractor-beam which sucks of The Drunken Clam.
Cronker: With The Drunken Clam being the only source for beer, the Quahog citizens will go mad and destroy themselves. That's Plan A, Plan B is to then enslave them and then give them 1 beer a year so they can get their fix. They'll want to work harder so they can get more beers. Then I'll rename Quahog, Matitee. It's a perfect plan, Mr. Mini Me Gee Gee Romper Stomper Cromper.
Ku Lu Poo Gee Gee Fus: Sir, there's a beer brewery nearby.
Cronker: Destroy it.
Cut to the Pawtucket brewery. A missile is fired and destroys the brewery. Pat runs out screaming.
Pat: Help! Help! Help! Help!
Back to the Spaceship.
Ku Lee Poo Gee Gee Fus: Sir, there's multiple houses with beer in them. What should we do?
Cronker: Unleash the tractor-beams.
He presses the "Unleash" button which sucks up all the beer in Quahog.
Alien walks out of the bar.
Cronker: Hello Marcia Hines Wallace Brady. The mission was successful.
Marcia: Yeah, that's great, but there are people in the bar you know.
Cronker: We'll just send them back to their houses.
Cut to Griffin house. Peter waves the spaceship goodbye.
Peter: Those aliens were nice.
Quagmire :( V.O): Where's my beer!
Quagmire runs out of the house.
Quagmire: Peter, you've seen my beer.
Peter: I don't know, maybe Gollum took it.
Cut to a beach with Gollum holding a beer bottle tightly.
Gollum: My precious.
Frodo enters.
Frodo: Give us back my beer.
Gollum: No, my precious.
Gollum gets a gun and shoots Frodo and stabs him multiple times and drags him through the sand.
Gollum: How do you like it now, Mr. Frodo?
Cut back to Peter.
Peter: Maybe not.
Cleveland runs out of the house as well.
Cleveland: You're not the only person without beer Quagmire.
Joe: (V.O): Where's my beer?!?!
Cleveland: Check your house, Peter to see if your beer is also gone.
Peter: Okay, sure.
Peter runs in and screams "NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!".
Quagmire: Poor guy.
Peter runs out again.
Peter: There was no beer.
Joe wheels himself outside.
Joe: We heard.
Quagmire: As long as we've got The Drunken Clam, we can still get drunk.
Cut to where The Drunken Clam used to be.
Cleveland: Now there's no beer at all.
Peter: You know what this means, without beer we'd be like……women.
Dramatic chord.
Quagmire: Ah, s#.
Cut to the Griffin house. Peter is on the couch, shaking back and forth.
Lois: Peter, What is so bad about water.
Peter: It isn't beer.
Lois sits down.
Lois: Well, just get a beer from the fridge.
Peter: I told you Lois, there is no beer at all in Quahog. And we can't go interstate because the roads suddenly closed.
Cut to interstate part. Aliens are building wire fences reading: "Do Not Enter Any Under Circumstances What So Ever". Back to the Griffin house.
Meg enters.
Meg: Well at least Dad gets to stay home now……(to self)….I suppose.
Peter: I know, brew my own beer.
Lois: Peter, fans of The Simpsons already think we're similar to them, we don't want to steal ideas of their episodes now do we.
Peter: No, ma'am.
Later at night. Peter is tossing and turning.
Peter: I never wanted beer so bad in my life.
Lois wakes up.
Lois: Peter, remember that time your first bar closed?
Cut to the Cheers bar, Sam Malone is closing it down what Peter is standing in shock.
Peter: But you can't close down the bar Sam.
Ted: For that last time, my name is Ted. And this bar was never real. It was a set.
Peter: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO GO?!?!
A Bartender walks over to Peter.
Bartender: We opened The Drunken Clam in Quahog, Rhode Island.
Peter: I'll tell my family we're moving.
Back to present. Later at night, Peter is sleepwalking; he grabs out an axe and aims at the water cooler.
Peter: Need beer. Need beer.
Peter smashes the water cooler to find crushed ice, he starts drinking it.
Peter: Better then nothing.
Cut to the spaceship.
Cronker: Marcia.
Marcia: Yes, sir.
Cronker: Send me down to Earth to begin Plan B.
Marcia: Yes, sir.
Next day, the Griffins are eating breakfast while watching Quahog News.
Bill O'Reilly: Hello, I'm Bill O'Reilly….replacement for Tom Tucker.
Larry King: And I'm Larry King…..sigh….replacement for Diane Simmons
Bill O'Reilly: Today, the aliens have decided to finally enslave this stupid town of Quahog. Here's Asian reporter Trisha Tuckanwa.
Cut to Trisha, outside of the Griffin house.
Meg: Hey, that's our house!
Peter: Yeah, hahahahahaha.
Cut back to Trisha.
Trisha: Thank you Bill. The humble town of Quahog is now rotten to chaos as there's no beer at all. Citizens can't go interstate or another country as the airplanes have mysteriously disappeared. And they also can't change cities because the roads are blocked with electric fences. The Quahog citizens are trying hard.
Cut to the road block, while cars are driving into the fence…exploding on impact. This keeps happening for another 30 seconds. Cut back to Trisha.
Trisha: And now the other citizens are destroying their houses to find that sweet taste of alcohol. Visitors from Neptune are now using this as a chance to finally enslave all of Quahog. Bill.
Aliens are entering the Griffin house with lasers. They are chaining them up and forcing them to march. Cut to near the city hall, they are building a large laser gun aiming at them. Cut to Stewie.
Alien: All hail Cronker Matitee! All hail the supreme ruler!
Stewie: I suppose I'm to blame for this.
End of Act Two.
Act Three.
City Hall. Mayor Adam West and Cronker are talking on the table.
Cronker: So, Mr. West.
Mayor West: Umm, that's Mayor West….
Cronker: ….Wh….atever. Mayor, compile with our demands or we'll destroy Quahog with the lasers the slaves are building.
Mayor West: We will not negotiate with terrorists.
Cronker: I'm an alien.
Mayor West: Yeah and I was the original Batman.
Pause.
Mayor West: Which I was!
Cronker: Good for you. Anyway, give us the weapons of the mass destruction. So we can finally destroy the sun.
Mayor West: That's where I get my powers from….…I think.
Cronker stands up in a leaving position.
Cronker: So long Mr. West, let the city of Matitee rule.
Mayor West: But it's called Quahog.
Cronker grabs out a laser and shoots Mayor Adam West to his death.
Cronker: Now, it's Matitee.
Cronker leaves, laughing evilly.
Outside, Lois is trying to carry a boulder but then drops it.
Lois: Oh, god. Peter, what will we do?
Peter: We must lead a rebellion, just like my great Uncle Peter Lalor Griffin
Flashback. Peter's uncle is speaking into a microphone on a podium in front of millions of gold miners.
Peter Lalor Griffin: We are doing well, the troopers are not checking our licenses. But it's pathetic that we now have to pay 1000 shillings a day.
Miner #1: It's your fault Griffin!
Miner #2: Yeah.
Miner #3: Let's trash the Eureka Hotel. To piss them off some more.
Miners: Yeah.
Miner #4: Better yet, we burn our licenses.
Miners: Yeah.
The miners burn their licenses.
Peter Lalor Griffin: Stop!
Miners: NO!
Miners rush off to trash the Eureka Hotel.
Miners: Yeah.
Peter Lalor Griffin: Oh will, I tried.
He walks off. Back to present. Brian walks over to Peter and Lois.
Brian: I'm with you Peter. I haven't felt this bad since dog training school.
Flashback. There is a class full of dogs and a human teacher out front with a blackboard reading: "Dogs Must Follow Orders", "Dogs Must Help Humans", "Dogs Must Be Potty-Trained", "Dogs Must Talk Human" and "Dogs Must Be Sophisticated".
Teacher: Okay, so what have we learned?
Pause.
Teacher: Anyone, okay Brian.
Brian walks out front.
Teacher: What must dogs do?
Brian: Help humans?
The teacher grabs a taser and starts electrocuting Brian.
Teacher: DOGS MUST BE POTTY-TRAINED!!!! , NOT TO HELP HUMANS!!! HAVE YOU EVEN READ THE BLACKBOARD?!?!
Back to present. Chris, Meg & Stewie walk to them.
Chris, Meg: We want in as well.
Stewie: Actually, I came to say…..that I'm the reason everyone's enslaved.
Peter: What?!?!
Lois: Stewie!!!
Brian: I hope you learned your lesson you little s#!
The teacher than starts electrocuting Brian again.
Teacher: No swearing either, you f#ing bastard!
Stewie: I don't know why I said it. But I did, I want in as well.
Peter: To the Knight Rider!
Peter grabs Lois, Brian and the kids to the car from Knight Rider. Inside the car, Peter starts the engine.
KITT: I'm afraid I can't let you do this Peter.
Peter: Screw you KITT.
Peter drives off.
Marica: Hey, they're getting away!
Cronker: We'll have to send more aliens then.
Cronker grabs out a mobile.
Cronker: Moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo, moo (Hey guys, come down to Earth okay).
Spaceships start flying down. A batch of aliens come, including Marvin the Martian.
Marvin the Martian: I'm so very angry.
Cut to the Griffin House. Peter drives the car through the door into the lounge.
Peter: We're here
KITT: I'm afraid I have to send a signal to the aliens, Peter.
Peter punches "KITT" which makes it malfunction.
KITT: Bye, bye. Me have to poopy. I want chicken tonight…not googoo gaga.
The family is watching Popular.
Brooke: Hi nerd, I'm popular.
Brooke walks over to a teacher.
Brooke: Hi Ms unpopular. I'm popular. It's fun to be popular.
Meg: I'd love to be popular.
Brooke: Popular, popular, popular, popular. I am pop….
Cut to the Quahog newsroom.
Announcer: We interrupt this program for a special news bulletin.
Cut back to Brooke.
Brooke: Like, excuse me. I was talking here until you rudely interrupted me.
Announcer: I'm sorry Ms. Brooke McQueen.
Brooke: Can I finish off this act now.
Announcer: How many more minutes?
Brooke: Well, we have a big music number…Carmen gets killed…..and Josh has sex with me and Nicky. So I'll say about 12 minutes.
Cut to the Griffins.
Peter: Oh my God, she spoiled it for me! I don't want to watch now…..think I'll have a beer.
Lois: There's no beer at all in Quahog.
Peter: Aaah, crap. I want beer.
Chris: I was talking in an Alien Believers chatroom and KlingonsAreCool2000 said all the beer in Quahog is stored in the alien spaceship.
Peter: The klingons said that? They must be right.
William Shatner enters through the door and does all his crazy moves like in previous episodes.
William Shatner: Oh my god, the Klingons are back! What shall we do?
Chris: I don't….
William Shatner: I must destroy them….away.
William flies through the window.
Peter: Let's get all the beer back so everyone can get drunk and destroy the spaceship.
Brian: Peter, that's the best idea I've heard you say ever since you decided to spay the old dog, Chuckles.
Chris: Then we'll show them whose boss. Ha-ha-ha-ha.
Meg: Yeah.
Stewie: Yes, yes. Get…drunk.
Peter: To the Batmobile!
Lois: What happened to KITT?
Peter points to the car humping a cup.
KITT: I need an adult here.
Peter and the family rush to the Batmobile, it goes off in the speed of light.
Superman: That's one fast car.
Cut to the city hall. The aliens are guarding the place, while several are looking for the Griffins.
Cronker: Have they found the rebellions yet?
Marcia: No sir.
Cronker: Crap. If President Neptune finds out about this he'll kill me and then I'm off the Republican party.
Marcia: And don't forget your daughter needs to survive.
Cronker: Yes, I know. I sent her off to this thing called "Survivor".
Cut to the "Survivor" island. There's humans and one alien (Cronker's daughter).
Jeff Probst: And now the person who's being voted off is…..
Jeff gets a card.
Jeff Probst: ……Cronkette Matitee.
Cronkette: What! This is an outrage! I'm going to get my dad to enslave all you bastards.
Cronkette leaves.
Female Contestant: Good like with that.
Jeff Probst: You're also been voted off, Josie.
Josie: Damnit.
Josie walks off.
Back to the City Hall. The Batmobile crashes through City Hall into the office.
Peter: We're here.
Out back, the Griffins are looking at all the spaceships parked at the parking lot.
Peter: Chris?
Chris: Yeah, dad.
Peter: You didn't mention they'll be kazillion spaceships.
Chris: I didn't know…
Peter: SHUT UP!
Lois: Peter!
Peter: Sorry.
Stewie: If I learned anything from researching machinery and technology, the biggest ship is usually the "mother ship". Find the "mother ship" and we'll find that beverage every idiot loves so f…..
Peter: Found it. (Peter points to the mother ship)
Lois: Okay, Peter. Me and you well throw out the beer. Chris & Meg, you two distract the security guards. Brian, you fly the spaceship. And Stewie, you'll be with me.
Stewie: (sarcastic): Oh, I'll enjoy that.
Peter, Lois, Brian & Stewie rush to the spaceship while Chris & Meg look on.
Meg: Okay, lard-o…..you better come in handy.
Chris: Yeah, I have hands. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
Meg: Idiot.
Chris & Meg run off.
In the spaceship, Brian is looking at porno magazines while Stewie is flying the spaceship.
Stewie: Oh, dog. You better be lucky I'm here, because if it where just you here. You'll die in seconds.
Brian: A toddler says what?
Stewie: Huh?
Brian: Never mind.
Cut to the other room. Peter and Lois are in a room filled with beer.
Lois: Remember Peter; don't drink the beer until you get home.
Peter: Yes boobie.
Pause.
Peter: I mean ma'am.
Pause.
Peter: Lois.
Cut back to City Hall. Chris & Meg approach the security guards.
Meg: Hey, and get us!
Security Guard #1: It's one of the rebellions!!!
Security Guard #2: Get those men!
Meg: Huh?
The security chase after Chris & Meg. The spaceship flys over City Hall.
Herbert: Boy, look at that muscley paper-boy run.
Peter & Lois lower down and start throwing out beer.
Peter: Drink beer my little idiots!
Quagmire: Beer!
Loretta: You go Lois.
Bonnie: I can't drink, I'm expecting.
Everyone (expect Bonnie) drinks beer. They all get drunk and end up destroying the spaceships. Later, all the aliens are arrested and the Griffin family unites.
Lois: Peter, we saved the day.
Peter: Without a minute to spare until Star Trek.
Lois: You see, crazy things like this unite families to help the community to defeat the evils in the world. You see, we defeated those cruel aliens with teamwork.
Peter: Teamwork?
End of Act Three.
DELETED SCENE
Lois: And that time that those people asked to appear on that talk show on Cartoon Network.
Space Ghost Coast to Coast set, Peter is on the monitor talking to Space Ghost.
Space Ghost: Citizen Peter, welcome to the show.
Peter: I need beer here.
Space Ghost: Beer is the nectar of the nitwit.
Zorak stares at him. Back to Space Ghost.
Space Ghost: According to Comic Book Guy.
Cut to the lava room. Moltar is on the control panels.
Moltar: I've got some beer.
Space Ghost: No beer.
Peter: Ah, man.
Brak enters.
Brak: I'm Brak. Get it, I'm BRAK.
Tansut: (V.O): Yes, we get it.
Lokar: Not me.
Cloud: I'm a Birdman villain. I used to be FEAR #1.
Moltar: Guest star on Harvey Birdman, Attorney at Law. You're a Birdman villain, not a Space Ghost villain.
Brak: But I'm not a villain, I'm dumb.
Peter: (mopey): I…need…beer.
END OF DELETED SCENE