STEELE A MISFIT
Another day another dollar, Remington thought walking in the office door.
There was Mildred milling about as usual and no doubt Ms. Holt was busy with some business matter. Maybe a new client? Lately business has been very dull.
"Morning, boss." Mildred greeted. "Ms. Holt is on the phone with some music executive. From the sound of it this guy's one stubborn customer."
"I guess Ms. Holt will be again in a foul mood." Remington mused.
"That does it!" Laura yelled from her office, followed by the sound of a phone slamming.
Remington ventured into the office.
"Laura?" He asked.
"That, that man is absolutely relentless. Won't take no for an answer and then threatened to release a tape of me doing my fan dance." Laura seethed.
"What man?" Remington asked quite confused.
"Eric Raymond. Head of Stingers Sound. Arg! I hate music industry people, there all so phony." Laura continued to rant.
"Laura, what did he want?"
"He wanted for us, you, to take on a case dealing with that music group The Misfits. Something about them looking for a missing person." She said. "Bunch of slutty troublemakers. Now Jem and the Holograms seem like a nice group why can't they be the ones to need a missing person found."
Remington tried not to laugh. He actually liked the Misfit's music. It was catchy, edgy, not like Jem's syrupy sweetness.
"Let's take the case." Remington stated. "You don't want to do it, I'll take care of the Misfits."
"That's not how it works. I'm the detective here."
"But my name's on the door."
"I gave you that name and its my door."
"Time out!" Mildred walks in and interrupts. "Take the case, what's the big deal. I've seen those Misfits on that VTV. They can't be anyworse than Felicia or the Major."
"She has a point." Laura says after a moment of consideration. "I'll call Mr. Raymond back and agree to meet with them."
Laura dialed some numbers into the phone and soon agreed on a time to meet with Eric Raymond and his cohorts.
"They'll be here in an hour." Laura said.
"Laura, I can take care of the face to face if you find it so repugnant." Remington offered.
"I just may take you up on that but I think for a first meeting I should be there."
An hour later, Mildred looked up and saw Pizzazz, Roxy, Stormer, Jetta and Eric Raymond stroll in.
"I'm Eric Raymond and these are The Misfits. We have an appointment with Remington Steele." Eric announced.
"I'll let him know you're here." Mildred said picking up the phone and buzzing Remington and Laura. "Your next appointment is here."
Mildred showed the group into Remington's spacious office. Remington came out from behind his desk to greet them, just as Laura walked in from her office.
"Mr. Raymond, I'm Remington Steele and this is my valued associate Ms. Holt." Remington said offering his hand.
"Thank you for meeting with us, Mr. Steele. This is Pizzazz, Jetta, Stormer, and Roxy. The Misfits." Eric responded shaking Remignton's hand.
Remington shook hands with each of the Misfits saving Roxy for last. The moment he touched her hand, he felt a jolt of electricity. He looked at her face and realized just how beautiful she was, despite the odd makeup. He lost himself in those brown eyes for what seemed like an eternity.
"Nice to meet you too, blue eyes." Roxy smirked and gently moved her hand away.
Laura rolled her eyes heavenward.
'The man is a walking gland' She thought. 'And the white haired one? At least the one with the blue hair is the nice Misfit.'
"Now, Mr. Raymond as you were telling Ms. Holt, you need a missing person found. Who is it?" Remington queried.
"Jem." Eric responded.
"Jem's missing? Shouldn't her manager or something be looking for her?" Laura asked, suspicious of their motives.
"Let me rephrase. We want to know who Jem really is. She's quite a mystery to us and we'd like to know what and who we really are up against." Eric explained.
"Do you have any background on her?" Laura asked.
"None, which is why it brings up a number of questions. THis is something we've been trying to find out for a few years but we've just finally decided to hire professionals."
"Something Eric does often." Jetta snickered.
"Oh shut up Jetta. Like you haven't hired a few male 'escorts'." Roxy retorted.
"Shut up you two!" Pizzazz yelled.
Stormer just tried to disappear.
"Daddy's paying good money for this." Pizzazz added.
"Well if Daddy's paying good money then by all means." Roxy mumbled.
"Ladies, Mr. Raymond, we can try and see what we can find out. I'm somewhat an expert on mysterious people." Laura said quite pleased with her little quip.
Remington rolled his eyes this time.
"Perhaps, one of the girls can help out. They are familiar with Jem and all of her friends." Eric suggested.
"Yeah, how about Rox for brains, she watches all those tv shows and movies." Jetta laughed.
"Some of it had to have sunk in." Pizzazz snorted.
Stormer still remained quiet.
"Me?" Roxy asked. "What do I know about playin detective?"
Remington saw what was happening and didn't think that they should gang up on one another. Especially since he knew what it felt like to be the odd man out. When Murphy and Bernice were around he was constantly mocked and belittled.
"I think you'd do a wonderful job. And you would be working with a seasoned veteran, like myself." Remington said. "I'd welcome the help."
Roxy thought about it and saw the envy in Pizzazz and Jetta's eyes. She smiled and thought this would be one time she'd have a leg up on them.
"Yeah, why not." Roxy answered. "When do I start?"
"How about now." Remington replied. "If that's alright with you, Mr. Raymond."
"Fine, she's your problem now. One less headache to deal with." Eric said, rising out of his seat. "Mr. Steele, I'll be in touch for a progress report."
"Very good. Nice to meet you all." Remington said showing him and the remaining Misfits out of the office. "Mildred, Roxy is going to help us out here on this case. Roxy, Mildred, Mildred, Roxy. Mildred is indispensible around here. A genious with computers. Used to work with the IRS tax fraud division."
"Nice to meet you, honey." Mildred chuckled. "So you're in a rock band. Whatta you play?"
"Bass guitar." Roxy answered. "Wait if you worked for the IRS shouldn't Jem have paid taxes? Wouldn't that say who she really is?"
"See catching on already." Remington laughed. "Mildred, get started with that."
"Right-o boss." Mildred said.
"Mr. Steele, may I speak to you a moment?" Laura asked with cool undertones.
"Absolutely, Ms. Holt. Mildred, maybe give Roxy a quick computer lesson." Remington said before followoing Laura into her office.
"What was that? We dont' need a snoop hanging around the office. Mildred is bad enough and now you brought this, this Misfit in. She has no experience, no interest in detective work, no skills that we can use." Laura pointed out. "She's only going to be a nuisance. I hope she doesn't pull any of that crap she pulls on Jem on the Holograms. Did you know that Roxy almost ran Howard Sands over with a bulldozer?"
Remington smiled.
"She did what? A bulldozer? Really Laura, I'm sure she must have had her reasons." Remington responded. "And if the man wasn't hurt, who are we to criticize?
"Fine, as Mr. Raymond said, she's your problem." Laura said. "I wash my hands of it. You deal with her."
"If you insist, Laura." Remington smirked and walked out of the office.
"Mr. Steele, Mildred can't find anything on Jem." Roxy snorted. "Some computer expert."
"Hey, kiddo, expert or not, I can't make something appear that doesn't exist." Mildred retorted, liking having someone to spar with.
"Please, call me Remington. Mr. Steele has such subordinate undertones." Remington flirts. "No tax return? At all?"
"Bupkiss." Mildred said giving him some silent sign.
"Very interesting. Roxy, why don't we go back into my office and you tell me all you know about this Jem." Remington suggested. "Mildred, check the usual sources, DMV, etc. Something has to come up."
"Should I check passports?" Mildred quips.
"If you think you'll find anything." Remington says and leads Roxy into his office.
They sit on the mauve couch and he takes out a small pad from his pocket.
"Usually if its an actual missing person we run what we in the detective business call a skip trace. But since Jem isn't missing that wouldn't pertain to this case. So we'll start with what you know." Remington began. "What do you know?"
"The first time we'd ever seen or heard of Jem is when she appeared at the Battle of the Bands just as the Misfits were about to be named the winners. Never seen her or the Holograms before. See, Eric Raymond used to work for Emmet Benton. He was left a portion of Starlight Records when he died. The other parts were divided between Kimber and Jerrica Benton. Kimber is the keyboardest for the Holograms. And Jerrica now runs the company. In some deal he lost his shares." Roxy said. "So Pizzazz's dad bought Misfits Music which now is called Stingers Sound in yet another stupid assed move of Raymond's."
"So this man had two companies and lost control over both?" Remington askes, trying not to laugh.
"You got it and he's been trying to figure out who Jem is all this time. I think he needs a hobby." Roxy smirked.
"Jem appeared from nowhere, has no past that anyone knows of and no tax records. Perhaps Jem isn't her real name." Remington said.
"Great detective, you are." Roxy said. "In this business half the names are made up. Jetta, Pizzazz, Stormer, Riot, Rapture, Minx. Their real names would shock you."
"I'm shock proof."
"Pizzazz is really Phyllis Gabor and Minx is Ingrid Kruger."
"Now I know why they changed them." He smiled. "And your's?"
"Roxy."
"Just Roxy?" He continued to flirt. "I can find out who exactly you are, down to your phone number."
"Fine go ahead. But of course you'll have to call to see if you have the right number." Roxy flirted back.
"Of course. Have to check out all leads." He said looking into her eyes.
'Something about women with brown eyes that just melts my resolve' He thought.
"Jem lives at Starlight Mansion and is very big into the whole charity thing. I guess Jerrica Benton talked her into it."
"Hmm. Perhaps Jem is her initials? Hold on one second." Remington says and goes to Mildred.
"Mildred check all females in the age group of 20-30 with the initials J. E. M.." He delegated. "Roxy, we're going to go find some pictures of the major players here."
"Where?" She asked joining him.
"Magazines of course. I'm sure you know which music magazines they would be in." He explained. "And then we may have to pay a visit to Starlight."
Remington armed with the magazine pictures of Jem and the Holograms begins to examine them with his keen eye. He notices the unique star earrings.
"She always wears those things. You'd think they're diamonds or something." Roxy pointed out. "Diamonds go with everything but those things are ugly. I think they were a gift from Jerrica Benton since she has the same pair. Like a best friends gift or something."
"They are unique though." Remigton pointed out. "You wouldn' have any performance footage of Jem would you?"
Roxy just gives him a look.
"No, I suppose not." He laughed. "Can you see about getting some while I go meet Jerrica Benton?"
He hands her a credit card.
"Sure, should I meet you back here?" Roxy asked. "Or should I take this baby for a spin?"
"No, the office'll probably be closed and we have no vcr here. You'll have to meet me at my apartment. Would that be alright? I can cook us dinner. No reason this shouldn't be a pleasant experience." Remington said. "And no, please don't take it for a spin. Laura and Mildred will have my head."
"What's their problem?" Roxy asked. "You own the business. Its your money."
"Not exactly. I have payroll to make and bills to pay." Remington said in his standard answer.
"Okay, I guess. See ya later then." She smiled and left.
'It hasn't been that unpleasant so far.' She thought as she left.
Laura stepped out of her office.
"So now what, Mr. Steele?" Laura asked.
"Now we go over to Starlight Music. Meet with Jerrica Benton. She signed Jem so she should know something about her." Remington said.
"Some of us have better things to do with our time." Laura huffed. "This entire case is a joke. Obviously the woman doesn't want her past known. Certain people shouldn't be hypocrites."
"Are you referring to me? You know my aliases and if I knew my real name I would tell you." Remington retorts. "Laura, we've been over this and over this. If you didn't want to know so much I would try and hide it so much."
"Fine I'll go with you. I'm curious as to what she has to say." Laura said as they leave still fighting.
STARLIGHT MUSIC
Remington walks up to the receptionist after dealing with hellish L.A. traffic and a parking garage with not one available spot. Add to that Laura's jabs and he's not in a good mood. But he puts on his public face and is determined to act professionally.
"I'm Remington Steele here to see Jerrica Benton." Remington informs her.
"Hold on, let me see if she's availible." she said and knocked on an office door.
She disappeared inside and Laura looked around.
"Upper class, sophistacated. Now this is the type of client we should strive for. Not the trash that walked in this morning. I had to wash my hands twice after shaking Raymond's hand." Laura complained. "And now that Roxy is hanging on to you."
"She's doing nothing of the sort." Remington said. "I asked for her help. In case you hadn't noticed what was going on there, the other two were busy picking on her. Saying how dumb she was. I've been in that position and thougt that I'd give her a chance to prove herself."
"Like that was your only motive." Laura said under her breath.
The receptionist came back out.
"Ms. Benton will see you." She said and led them in.
"Ah Ms. Benton. I'm Remington Steele and this is my associate Laura Holt." He introduced and shook her hand.
"I've read alot about you, Mr. Steele. How can I help you?" Jerrica replied, motioning for them to sit.
"We're trying to find out some background on Jem of Jem and the Holograms. We thought we'd start with her record company." Remington explained.
Jerrica nervously pushed her hair behind her ear and Remington caught a glance at the earring.
"Let me guess Eric Raymond is your client." Jerrica laughed. "Mr. Steele, Ms. Holt I assure you that Jem is on the up and up and likes her privacy. That's why she goes by a stage name. Now Eric and the Misfits have been trying for years to try and figure out who she is. They've been offering huge rewards for any information. Its silly really."
"So you wouldn't mind just telling us her real name and we can all be done with this." Laura said.
"I would if I could. But I'm very busy. I have a record company to run. I'm sorry Mr. Steele but I refuse to play into Eric Raymond's plans once again. I don't know who Jem really is but she's my biggest success here at Starlight and I won't compromise that with detectives hounding her." Jerrica said as Rio walked in.
"Hey, Jerrica, have you seen Jem?" He asked.
"No Rio, why?" Jerrica answered. "Oh Rio Pacheco, Remington Steele and Laura Holt. Rio's Jem's roadie and top sound man. I have to run some contracts downstairs, but I'll let Jem know your looking for her. Nice to meet you, Mr. Steele and Ms. Holt. Rio wil show you out."
Jerrica quickly left.
"Wow you two are really detectives? Like on tv?" Rio asked as he led them to the elevators.
"In a way. Tell Jerrica thank you for her time." Remington said as he and Laura step into the elevator.
The doors close.
"What did you make of that? I think she's hiding something."
"I think she's just protecting her talent."
The doors opened ont he lobby floor and there was Jem walking into another elevator going up.
"Something about her seems phony." Remington said.
Laura just laughed and shook her head as they drove back to the office.