On the Road

Kenshin wandered. It was what he did, being a wanderer, and he did it happily. Yes, yes it was raining. And yes, yes there was more mud on his clothes than there was on the road. But such was the way of wandering. He tried to remember what town lay in front of him… several miles in front of him, several miles of mud and rain. But he couldn't call the name up in his mind. With a shrug, he decided it didn't really matter. Towns and villages all started looking rather alike after enough wandering. Roads did the same. With a little bit of alarm, he realized that he couldn't even seem to remember what part of Japan he might be in. But he kept walking. Wandering. It was what he did… being a wanderer and all.

It was raining quite hard. Kenshin looked up at the sky, to see if there were any chance of it letting up soon, but the action nearly drowned him. So he didn't try that again. Eyes fixed on the mud in front of his wet feet, he kept on. The rain, the walking, the squelch of the mud, he fell into a half-trance. Wandering, wandering, wandering… a singsong sort of chant ran through his mind. It was after all, what he did. He'd found himself repeating that thought often. Re-asserting his role to himself whenever that role became a little uncomfortable.

His chant was interrupted when Kenshin tripped, falling face first into the mud. I gave up Kaoru for this?! The outraged thought sprang into his mind, and he banished it quickly as he picked himself up. Kaoru was not mine to give up. He reminded himself, looking at his now mud covered hands. The mud was slick and dark, and despite its coldness, reminded him rather disconcertingly of blood. With a slow nod he resumed walking, forcing his hands back down to his sides, out of his vision. He hadn't had a hallucination in months, and for a moment he'd been afraid that he was really seeing blood dripping from his hands.

Kaoru… he could still picture her with crystal clarity, if he wanted to. And sometimes, he chose to. Another form of his self-punishment, telling himself he couldn't have the only woman he'd come close to wanting in over a decade. This unworthy one could never soil Kaoru-dono with his sins. This unworthy one must get to the next village and do some laundry, that he must.

His thoughts turned, unbidden to the slick dark mud on his hands. It was only mud. He reminded himself fiercely. The visions are not coming back. I've escaped them. I know I have. The visions of blood seemed to have begun so long ago… had it really been only a year since he'd run away from Kaoru to escape them? A little more than a year, he finally figured. He shuddered again, remembering them.

Kaoru, just out of her bath, hair still wet… slick… dark… He could see the blood dripping down her back, down her face, smell it in the air. He could feel it on his hands, and he had known, with a horrible certainty, that if he looked down, his hands would be dark with blood. Kaoru's blood.

Kaoru was trying yet again to make a good dinner for her makeshift family. A bit of dark sauce splashed on her cheek just before he walked into the kitchen. When she turned and smiled at him, he saw blood, dark on her face, wet on her lips, spilling from her throat. The stench of death swam around his head and he had to fight to keep from screaming in terror.

Kaoru slept, her long dark hair spilling around her shoulders in the moonlight. A strand crossed her throat, and he saw it slit open, blood congealing behind her head.

At any moment of the day - or night, when he took the liberty of checking on her while she slept - he might see blood. He'd known he was going mad, and hadn't any idea what to do. He'd been afraid to even look at her, afraid of the blood he might see. It was his taint, his sins, and the blood he had spilled, that covered his beloved.

Beloved… the thought pulled him from his morbid memories. Could he really call her that? Yes, yes it was all right now. Now that she was safe, and far away from him.

Sano looked up at the rain, nearly drowning from the weight of it. Sheesh… I should have just stayed at the bar. Megumi would have been fine without me for one night. Looking back at the road in front of him, he blinked to get the rain out of his eyes. His vision was so blurred that he didn't see the small figure directly in front of him until they collided. Picking himself up from the muddy street took some careful balance, but when he was standing Sano began to apologize before looking the other person.

"I'm really sorry… this stupid rain…" he began, but then found himself staring at a confused pair of familiar violet eyes.

Without another word Sano socked one of those eyes, and proceed to hit the face again without even thinking about it.

"Oro!" Kenshin's voice rose from the mud. "Sanosuke?"

"Yeah… it's me, ya little…" Sagara was pulling his fist back again as he stepped toward the rurouni, but then stopped himself. Instead he reached down and grabbed the pink collar. "You're comin' with me, red. You've got a lot to answer for." And with that, he dragged Kenshin down the street. At last, he'd found the bastard that had broken his Jou-chan. At last, Kenshin would see just what he'd done when he left Kaoru. At last, he'd pay. But not at his hands… oh, there would be time for that. But Kaoru would have hers first.

"Oro?"

The downpour had begun only moments after Megumi had come in from the bathhouse. The family had eaten dinner, and she settled in with her new medical notes, to study with the elderly doctor who had agreed to teach her while she stayed in the town. He was letting her and Sano stay in his home with his family also, provided that Sano do some work around the house and clinic.

At the moment, her traveling companion was enjoying a rare night out. Sano had no trouble making friends with locals, and he was spending the evening at a local restaurant getting drunk with them. Judging by the weather that had just sprung up, she doubted he would return before it let up at the very least, and most likely he wouldn't bother coming in until morning. And no doubt he'll expect me to cure him of a night spent passed out under a table. "Surely you can do something with this head, kitsune!" I can hear him whining now. She couldn't help but smile though. For some reason, their bickering and bantering had changed on the road. They still teased and taunted each other, but now there was a more palpable undercurrent to it. Flirting with Sanosuke was easier when they were both away from Kaoru's confusing presence.

A sound at the door distracted her from her reverie. Was that an 'Oro?'

"Kitsune!" Sano's voice called. "Come here!"

Megumi and the doctor rushed to the door. Sano and Kenshin were standing there, dripping mud and water. The doctor, fearing for his floors, quickly rushed off to get towels and mats.

"Look what I found in the street." Sano's voice was harsher than Megumi had heard it in a very long time. Kenshin looked around, seeming rather dazed and confused by what was happening. One eye was slightly puffy with the beginnings of a colorful bruise.

"Oh… my…" Megumi was speechless. She didn't even know where to begin. Should she berate him for what he'd done? Question his reasons? Take care of his eye? Be kind and welcoming or cruel and harsh? "Ken-san…"

"Megumi-dono…" Kenshin was finally able to say something besides 'Oro.'

"You keep quiet you…" Sano growled. Megumi was surprised to see the fury clouding her friend's features. He was even shaking from the effort of suppressing his rage.

"Sanosuke!" She cried. "What… where… why??" She didn't know what to say to him either. She couldn't remember the last time she'd been so confused.

"Pack your bags, foxy." Sano's growl was gentler towards her. "We're going back to Tokyo."

That man is completely insane. Kaoru sank into the hot bathwater, wincing a little. My god… it's a wonder Kenshin survived training with Hiko-sama… the madman. The heat felt good on her abused muscles, and she finally let herself relax. It had taken a great deal of convincing to get the master to give her a little training, but eventually she had convinced him that she wouldn't leave until she had learned what she wanted from him. Even so, he wasn't giving her much, and he was making her pay for every morsel. Bruises covered her body, muscles had been pushed beyond their limits, and her mind reeled from just trying to keep up with Hiko. She was exhausted, weak with fatigue and frustration. Hiko wanted her out of the dojo; he wanted Kenshin found and the whole ordeal over with.

Kaoru had convinced Tae to come stay with Hiko and the family while she would be gone. She felt horrible asking so much of her friend, as if Tae didn't have a restaurant to take care of. Hopefully, she would just need to make sure chores stayed organized and got done, and take care of the little injuries that children got. She'd cut back the frequency of her classes, so that Yahiko could handle teaching them. As annoying as the little runt could be sometimes, he wasn't necessarily a bad teacher, and he was far enough ahead of the other students that he'd be comfortable. Hiko was more than capable of keeping a protective eye on things, and he swore to her that he could handle the children without killing them.

With a sigh, Kaoru stretched her limbs in the warmth of the bathhouse. She couldn't delay her departure for much longer. Part of her was trying to put it off forever. But her more practical side knew that the sooner she got out there and found Kenshin, the sooner she could come home and her life could return to normal.

Ha. As if things are ever going to be the same here again. Kenshin probably won't stay after that Kawajiri is dealt with. But will Hiko leave? I doubt it. I think that he's making his home here, and he's getting used to the kids. They're starting to get used to him too, almost like they were with Sano. I wonder if he and Megumi will ever come home? Kaoru wistfully remembered Sanosuke's careless grin, his comforting arm around her shoulders. Who knows? But Kenshin… where do I even begin looking for the rurouni? If I can get on his trail, he should be easy enough to follow. People will remember him, most definitely. What do I do when I find him? How am I supposed to convince him to come home? And what will he think of me when he gets here? What will he think of the children, of Hiko? What will he think of Hitokiri-dono?

Shaking her head, she stood up from the water. I'll leave tomorrow.

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Okay!! I know I haven't updated in forever and I know that this is a short chapter!! But I have my reasons!! Not the least of which is that I don't have TV anymore, so I don't see Rurouni Kenshin hardly EVER!!! But… I read some other fanfictions and that put me in the mood to write, so here ya go. I made some changes to the last chapter. The most important one for the story being that I decided against having Misao come to Tokyo. And now darlings… my replies to comments!!!

Chris37 - Thanks for noticing the eyes... and thanks for all the positive comments. hugs
Kay-san - I'm glad you were surprised! I hope you like where I've gone with this chapter, and where I'll go with the next!
VolleyGurly - Thank you! I'll go check out your story when I'm done writing these replies! I'm sure it's good!
Shinji Ikari - Oh... wow... Thank you sooooo much. I have never ever gotten a review so complete... so good... If you go back to Chapter 4 you'll see that I did change that about Misao. As for when this is... shrug I really don't have an answer for that. I haven't seen any of Samourai X, have no clue who Enishi is... and the Jinchu arc...??? Sorry... I watched part (most?) of the way through the Shishio episodes before life came between me and TV. I'm so glad you like my story though. I hope some of why Kenshin left is explained in this chapter.
D-Chan3 - I haven't decided yet just how the two of them will meet up, but I almost can't wait to write about it. Putting Kenshin in unfortunate positions is so fun sometimes...
Mystic-fox - Thank you! I know that there hasn't been much of Kenshin's perspective and angst so far, but there will be more!
evilteddybear - Okay... I admit it... sometimes I get a little carried away with details and things. I'm glad you like my Hiko, and I hope you like what's coming!
Everyone else... since you just yelled at me to update... grin I hope you liked the new chapter, and I promise to try and get chapters up faster from here on in.
blows kisses to all
Thanks again to everyone!