Summary: It's times like this when you don't think… Luke's POV from "The Cat"
Spoilers: The Cat
Disclaimer: I own absolutely nothing. And I'm poor and have no job. I'm totally not worth suing.
A/N: Yes, I know I have other fics to work on, and yes I am working on them. I really have no clue where this came from. It just kinda…did. Shout out to VanillaBean/Diminished9th/whatever for the beta and SiFiFan for the title help.
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Secret
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It's times like this when you don't think. You don't take your time, you don't master the precision and possible outcomes of your present course of action. You just take off - run - because someone needs you. For the first time in your life, someone needs you. You know she'd never admit it out loud, but just seeing those words, those three simple words, was enough to let you know she did. As you run down the cracked sidewalks of your neighborhood, skipping the bus since you know you're faster on foot anyway, you think about how much how much it meant for her to send you those words. She let you in; for the first time since you've known her, she reached out from behind the brick wall she keeps around herself, took your hand, and pulled you in with her.
You know it probably took her a lot of soul searching to bring herself to type those words, even more to send them. You've studied her long enough to see she keeps herself more guarded than Fort Knox. But she's let you in, little by little, moment by moment, she's allowed you brief glances at the girl behind the mask.
You knew when you met her that there had to be a catalyst, an explanation, a reason for why she was the way she was. Why her eyes were always so closed off, why she kept the world at arm's length. Why a smile on her face was so rare and why you felt so good when you knew you were the cause of one. You knew she had secrets, you knew she carried burdens that weighed her down like a nomad carrying everything she owned on her shoulders. You knew she had pain, but you never dreamed it would be like this.
My Mother drinks.
That was the first thing you could remember from that morning. You had no explanation for why everything you did prior to seeing that message had been blocked out of your memory. The only thing you could remember were those words and her screen name flashing as she logged off, too overwhelmed with what she'd just done to talk to you then. You could smell the garlic coming from the kitchen, but you didn't care. You grabbed your bag and ran as fast as you could, somehow knowing you would find her. You'd always been the one that found her, because you were the first one that ever looked for her. You were the one that knew there was something else there, something you weren't being shown. And you were the one that was determined to solve the unsolvable, to put together the pieces of the puzzle that was Grace Polk.
As you threw open the front doors of the school you saw her standing at her locker. Standing there leaning into it as though she was trying to hide, as though she could feel your eyes on her. She looked up and her eyes met yours. Even with the distance between you they locked, and you could see the red around her eyes brought on by tears. It was a new sight, one you never imagined you'd ever see. You demanded the security guard hurry and swipe you with his wand; you were needed elsewhere, you didn't have time to deal with this draconian security. As soon as you're cleared, you run - and so does she. You knew she would, she always did. It was the one constant about her. You quickened your pace and caught up with her, softly grabbing her arm so she couldn't get away. You weren't going to let her run, not this time. She spun around at your touch, her eyes moist and the unshed tears catching the fluorescent light. It was different seeing it up close, actually seeing the tears in her eyes. Here was this girl, who you were pretty sure could beat you up, standing there looking more vulnerable with you now than she's probably ever looked in her life. You didn't try to hide your surprise, because you knew she didn't really care. You just looked at her as she silently begged for you to follow her before she spun around again.
You followed her into the empty classroom, your physics room. You'd be there for class before long, but somehow you knew she wouldn't stick around. She stopped running and turned toward you when you entered the room. She couldn't look at you, she couldn't speak. She just stood there shaking her head as if she couldn't believe what she'd done. You looked down at her more concerned, more worried than you ever thought you'd ever be for someone. She looked up at you after a few seconds, and that was when you saw it. The complete buildup of years of hiding without an iron shell, all of the consequences of what she'd told you - the pain, sadness, disbelief, and even the shame. You shook your own head in disbelief, hoping she understood you telling her that there was no reason to be ashamed, she wasn't the one doing anything wrong. But even so, you could still see it in her eyes as she silently asked you what she was supposed to do. You didn't have an answer. For the first time in your life no theories, no scientific method, no combination of formulas held the answer. You could tell she was about to break again as fresh tears approached the corners of her eyes. You would have given anything at that moment to be able to reach out and take away all of the pain that had ever plagued her, but you couldn't, so you did the only think you could think of. Slowly, you reached out and put your hand on her shoulder, expecting her to slap it away the second you touched the cold leather of her jacket. She didn't. She just stood there and swallowed, trying not to let you see her tears fall. She looked back down toward the ground as you slowly pulled her toward you. She didn't fight it like you thought for sure she would. She simply accepted it and reached one arm around your neck and the other to your shoulder, gripping you tighter than you though possible, even for her.
As you stood there softly rubbing her back just letting her know you were still there, the pieces of the puzzle began to come together. You saw why she hid herself, why she kept every detail about her life guarded under lock and key. Why she had tried so hard to make you want to walk away. But now she was letting you see this part of her that you're pretty sure she's never shown anyone. For one moment that became all too brief the second she pulled away from you, you saw the real her, the girl that no one else ever sees. The girl that no one else ever looks for. And she was beautiful.