The Way He Looks At Me

DISCLAIMER: I don't own or claim to own anything here. The characters belong to Fox, and I do not profit from my stories.

-Please, if you read this, please PLEASE review even if it's a couple words!

-This is a SLASH……..which means that there will be homosexual pairings, well, actually, malemale. SethRyan! However, I would like this to be a kind of loviedovie story….but I will have smut soon – no worries!

Summer had just reached Seth when she saw Ryan wide awake, and her hand that she had placed lovingly on his shoulder slowly slid off. He glanced at the three people standing around his bed before he took in the surroundings of his room.

Seth's mouth had formed a perfect O and Marissa was looking a bit teary-eyed. No one knew what to do or say, and no one wanted to move.

"Ryan….are you okay?" Marissa asked, speaking up first.

"Hmm? Oh, ya, I guess. My chest hurts, and my arm, and my leg, and face…..but other than that….." Marissa laughed as she moved closer to Ryan.

Seth also slowly stepped over to Ryan when he wasn't looking, and placed his hand in Ryan's before he whispered, "I'm so sorry."

Ryan's head moved quickly to Seth with a cold look in his eyes, which immediately seemed to disappear.

Ryan noticed the look on Seth's face, trying to place it, knowing he had seen it before. Seth seemed to be working something out in his head, but before Ryan could say anything he found his lips being massaged by Seth's.

He closed his eyes, allowing all the pain he was feeling to melt away for the few moments it lasted. The tension between the two seemed to dissipate. His mind was reeling. So much had just happened in less than a minute.

He leaned his head foreword as Seth broke the kiss, dying for more of the thing he had wanted; waited for, for the past several months to happen.

He looked up into his warm brown eyes as Seth whispered, "I'm so sorry," again.

"It's okay," Ryan whispered back, softly squeezing the hand he remembered was in his.

"I love you," Seth whispered again, but Ryan's face suddenly became tense. "Don't say that," Ryan responded in a stone voice.

"Oh. I'm…..uh……sorry?" Seth repeated for the third time, looking slightly confused and out of place.

Ryan looked away, dropping Seth's hand. "Just don't say it…….please."

They continued to gaze at each other in silence, swimming in each others eyes. Everything they had went through in the last couple days seemed to melt away.

Marissa and Summer moved to either sides of the bed and smiled at each other, happy with what they saw between the boys.

The sudden opening of the door brought all four of them back to earth as a doctor walked in – in a very chipper mood.

"Well! Were awake I see; always a good sign. Mr. Atwood, I'm Dr. Brown – I'll be your attending tonight. And how are we feeling?" he asked, not noticing the three other bodies in the room as he glanced over his charts and whatever else he was holding.

"I'm pretty tired, and uh………everything…..hurts………really, really bad."

"Well, in your case, yes. Everything should hurt. But that means that your nerve endings are alright and well, the pain is good. Oh, and who do we have here?" Dr. Brown asked as he looked up into the faces of Summer, Marissa, and Seth.

"Hi, I'm Seth," he said, seemingly eager to please. "This is….." Seth said, trailing off as a beeping started emanating from the Dr.'s crotch.

"Oh! That would be my pager. I will be back to see you when your visitors have gone so we can have a little more privacy, yes? Ok, nice meeting all you," he said as he hurried out of the room.

Seth glanced back at Ryan. "Well, that was interesting."

"To say the least," Summer sighed as she fell back into a chair.

Ryan did his best to shift in his bed, grimacing in pain as he did so. "This is very…….odd," he said as he gave up and sank back into the sheets.

"Wha?" Marissa asked, also sitting down.

"Well, I mean, I just got the shit beaten out of me a few hours ago, I heard Seth say he…….and I just kissed him, and you two are here and acting like nothing has happened. Is this to Twilight Zone? Should I go brood in the corner or something? Can someone else please start talking?" Ryan said with a slight smile, feeling very awkward again in the girls' presence. But something about having Seth right next to him holding his hand made everything seem alright.

It was Seth's turn to give Ryan's hand a reassuring squeeze as he glared at Summer who got the message. She got up, sighing heavily again, and made her way to the door. "I'm going for coffee…..coming Coop?" she asked, hoping Marissa would also catch on.

"Wait! You're going to go?" Ryan said immediately.

"Oh, Ryan. I'm really not that…….ouch!" Marissa yelped as Summer kicked her a little to obviously. "Oh, yes. I feel it now. Right there. I need my caffeine fix about now. I think I will join you Sum, excuse me." She stood up and met Summer at the door and they both left rather quickly, but quietly closed the door behind them.

Ryan stared intensely at the door, then, AGAIN remember Seth's hand, looked at it.

"Please don't leave me," he said in a soft voice, seemingly defeated.

"I would never," Seth responded, looking down into Ryan's blue eyes as he leaned in, placing a soft kiss on his tender lips, and never letting his gaze fall. Ryan allowed himself to relax into the kiss, slowly snaking his good hand to the Seth's back as Seth went to deepen their kiss for the first time.

Almost as soon as Ryan felt Seth's soft tongue, he broke away and quickly looked elsewhere in the room, trying not to meet Seth's suddenly concerned face.

"Did I do something?" Seth asked, refusing not to let Ryan's hand go.

"It's just," Ryan started, slowly tracing his eyes up Seth's body, "are you sure that this is what you want. To be with…...me? Another guy? I just don't won't you to…" but Ryan was unable to finish as Seth zoomed back in, placing a harder but still tender kiss on Ryan's lips, closing his eyes in pleasure.

After he felt he made his point, he broke away, smiled and asked, "If I didn't want to be with you, why oh why the hell would I keep kissing you?"

There. That took me so long. I can't believe I can't churn these chapters out quickly. My brain farts out on me every time I go to write this. I'm again sorry it took so long…but here it is! Please review!