Summary: The Acolytes are joined by the Brotherhood. SLASH!
A/N: The characters include Avalanche, Toad, Quicksilver, Blob, Scarlet Witch, and Mystique who are clearly the Brotherhood. Magneto, Gambit, Pyro, Sabertooth and Colossus, are the Acolytes.
This is set after Ascension however Magneto, Gambit and Colossus, aren't part of the X-men just yet. Oh and Magneto and Mystique get along in this.
Afro: This part is a little angsty…not much though….still funny! Least I think It is.
Afro: There gonna laughed whether they want to or not!
Afro: Everyone meet Bold Afro…she is really rude, and no one can control her, so beg her pardon for her stupidity.
Afro: Yer talkin about yer self..
Thoughts in Italic
The Brotherhood of Acolytes
Part Three
90909090909090909090909
That Morning
"Dad, I need my hair gel!" Pietro cried as his father throw the jar of gel onto a larger pile of gel jars.
"You don't need forty-two- no sorry forty three now," he said as he threw another jar to the pile, "gel packets, we are only going for a week and how the hell did you manage to fit them all in one bag?"
Pietro didn't answer, but kept pouting as another jar was thrown onto the pile. "Will you at least leave me a jar for each day?"
"I'll leave you three jars and that's it!" Magneto snapped. He zipped up the bags and threw them at Quicksilver, "Now get down stairs, we leave for the airport once we finish breakfast"
"Fine!" Pietro pouted walking out of his room. He bumped into Avalanche.
"So your dad sorted out your things?" Lance said smartly.
"Screw you!"
90909090909090909090909
Gambit watched as Mystique left the room, he glanced over to Pyro who was fast asleep under the cover. He pulled the cover of Pyro's face and frowned. The other man's eye bags were red from all the crying. He gently shook John.
"Johnny, get up, we gotta go to da airport," He muttered softly. Pyro opened one eye, and then the other. Then he narrowed them and hit Remy across the head. "Ouch! Cher!"
"Don't you 'cher' me!"
"Sorry cher, but Mystique that stupid blue whore ain't pregnant!" Remy said dodging another blow.
"Then why would she say that she was having yer flamin' baby!"
"She was lyin' so we don't have sex!" Remy said.
"Oh so now its sex is it, not making love!" John screeched kicking Remy in the head.
"Ow! Cher! Stop hitting me!" Remy cried. "You're gonna bruise me!"
"Well ye bruised me heart, you stupid Buggar!" John said hitting Remy once more. Remy let out an angry war cry and jumped on John pinning him down, "Get off me, ya bloody yobbo!"
"If you won't believe Remy's words, den you better believe his bloody actions," Remy said before pulled John into a long, passionate kiss. An extremely long kiss. John struggled. Remy pulled away and saw his skin had turned a sickly blue. "John!"
"You bloody idiot!" John coughed, "Next time warn a bloke before you suffocate them!"
"Sorry cher!" Remy cried, gathering Pyro into his arms. A single tear ran down his face, "didn't mean too!"
"You're –cough- doing it again mate!" Pyro said, pushing Gambit away from him, "Why the hell are you bloody crying for?"
"Cause I hurt you," Remy whispered, as Pyro wiped away the tear. Pyro couldn't stand seeing Gambit cry.
"Oh I'm fine, mate," Pyro grinned, "Got lungs of steel!"
"Okay," Remy muttered. "Promise me something?"
"Anything babe!"
"When Mystique talks to you about us, you open ya lighter and," He started of softly, before yelling furiously, "BURN HER FUCKING BLUE SKIN OFF! That bitch left me with a day of no love-making!"
"Um okay," Pyro said uncertainly. "Maybe we should go eat, but I hate to say it, but Mags said I can't burn any one."
"Damn him…"
90909090909090909090909
Breakfast
Pyro entered the kitchen alone, Gambit wanted to have a quick shower before they left. He looked around and only found Wanda scrambling eggs.
"Mornin' love," Pyro grinned.
"Get screwed," Wanda growled.
"You're one psycho Sheila," Pyro grinned, laughing like a maniac, "Actually can I ask ya something?"
"What?"
"Yer a witch right?"
"Yeah, kinda," Wanda answered, "What do you want?"
"Do you know any love potions?"
"Yeah, actually got one right here with me," Wanda said pulling a small bottle out of her pocket while she stirred, "What do you want it for?"
"Remy,"
"Oh okay," Wanda said, "Look I've gotta go pee."
"Time of the month?"
"You want the potion or not?"
"I'll shut up," Pyro said quickly.
"Alright, this is what you will do, once you know the eggs are ready, you separate Remy's eggs from the rest and put them in a different looking plate to everyone else," Wanda said, "Then you place a single eye lash of yours in the potion right, got that?"
"Yeah eye lash in potion,"
"Only one, anyway, after that you just make sure Remy has the potion," Wanda said, "It spell should last for three days, but it might take a while for the spell to start, it should be enough for Remy to release he loves you."
"Thanks Wanda, how can I ever repay ya?"
"Don't talk to me would be good," Wanda suggested.
"Its as good as done," Pyro grinned as Wanda left the room in a hurry, "Must be dying to pee."
90909090909090909090909
Mystique watched as Sabertooth struggled to clean himself. He was sitting on his butt licking his legs, thighs and groin. She shook her head in disgust as he began to scratch his head with his sharp toe nails.
"What the hell are you doing?" she snapped.
"Trying to get of the effing fleas," Sabertooth growled bitting at his leg.
"Imbecile," Mystique left.
90909090909090909090909
Pyro stood confused, who exactly was meant to take the potion? He sighed and tipped some of the eggs onto two plates his own and Remy's. Then he dipped the entire potion onto the rest of the eggs. He mixed it and then placed it onto the other plates. He finished it off by placing sausages and bacon on every plate. He then set out the table as Pietro and Lance walked in.
"Oh great, the food was prepared by him," Lance sighed, "We're all gonna die.
"Shut up and eat the tucker mate," Pyro said, "In a few hours ya'll be having good old Aussie food, Vegemite, which I bloody miss like all hell!"
"Sounds good," Lance muttered, "Isn't made of vegetables is it?"
"Hell no, it as sweet as shit!"
"You know what shit taste like?" Pietro grinned as Remy entered.
"Sabertooth's cooking," Remy muttered. Lance and Pietro laughed as Blob, Toad, Magneto and Scarlet Witch entered. Pyro winked at Wanda, and grabbed his plate and Remy's.
"Hey, Remy wanna go eat out side?" Pyro suggested handing Gambit his plate. Gambit nodded and the two went outside. They sat on a swinging seat and began to eat.
"So what is Australia like?"
"Bloody hot in summer, gets up to bloody forty degrees and its fucking humid at the same freaking time," Pyro grinned, "but winter is like autumn here,"
"What season is in Australia now?"
"Summer,"
"Funny I think Magneto, Mystique and Pietro packed winter clothes," Gambit laughed.
"Should we tell em?"
"Nah,"
"So how are you enjoying your food?" Pyro grinned as Gambit kissed him gently on the lips. Gambit grinned, stabbed one of Pyro's sausages (No not that one) with his fork and bit the head off.
"Hey that's my wiener!" Pyro snapped hitting Remy across the head.
"You want my wiener," Remy said seductively. Pyro grinned and nodded. "Let's go to our room, cherie."
"Yay!" Pyro cheered. The potion is already working! He jumped up and threw his plate over his shoulder, it sailed threw the air and smashed into the kitchen window and landed in the sink.
"Nice shot," Gambit said, throwing his plate in as well.
"PYRO! GAMBIT!" Magneto hollered, "STOP BREAKING THE DAMN WINDOWS!"
"Sorry," Gambit and Pyro squealed running off.
"Idiots, that's the seven bloody windows they've broken this week," Magneto cursed.
90909090909090909090909
"Wanda! Pietro! Toad! Lance! Fred! Gambit! Pyro! Piotr! Victor! Raven!" Magneto shouted, leaning against the stairs "Hurry the hell up our ride is here and we have less then an hour to get to the airport!"
The ten other people ran down the stairs like a pack of St Bernard dogs. He shook his head, when suddenly Blob tripped and went sailing down the stairs. He crashed hard to the floor, and in the process made pancakes out Pietro, Wanda, Mystique, Victor, Lance, and Piotr. Gambit, Pyro and Toad were lucky that they were standing behind Blob. Pyro burst out laughing. However Gambit and Toad both thanked God for saving them.
Blob finally stood up. Wanda and Mystique helped each other up, they seemed quite alright after the fall. Piotr and Sabertooth stood up rubbing heads, butts, legs, arms and any were else that was bruise. Lance tried to stand but fell back onto Pietro who looked like he had broken every bone. Magneto helped Lance up and then gently lifted Pietro up.
"I can see little fat Blobs flying around my head," Pietro said faintly before fainting. Pyro burst out laughing once more, but then went screaming, sailing through the air covered by a magnificent blue light.
90909090909090909090909
The Airport before the flight.
"Ten dollars, for a stupid bar of chocolate!" Remy snapped at the salesman, "You're bloody insane! No one in their right mind would buy it."
"I'll have four packets," Pyro said handing over the money. The salesman looked over at Gambit with a smirk.
"He isn't in his right mind," Gambit snapped, snatching the money of the salesman, he threw the chocolates back at the man, and dragged John off.
"Hey I want my chocolate!" Pyro squealed.
"I'll get you nicer chocolate, it's cheaper," Gambit said, as his hand slide into a woman's bag, he pulled out a chocolate and handed it to Pyro, "It's for free!"
"I love you!" Pyro grinned bitting into the chocolate. Sabertooth walked up to him and suddenly pulled him into a hairy kiss. Pyro struggled kicking and mmmphing as Gambit stood in disgust.
"Pyro!" Gambit said in horror. Pyro continued to struggle until finally he managed to kick Sabertooth in the family jewels. The large cat dropped him and sank to the floor. "What the hell were you doing?"
"Trying to fucking breath," Pyro snapped spitting out the hair that managed to sink into his throat, "Stupid overgrown cat! Even his saliva taste like shit!"
"Maybe I can make that shit flava turn to raspberry," Lance muttered into Pyro's ear, he turned John around and pulled him into a gentle, long kiss. Gambit's eyes flared a darker red; he let out a war cry and jumped onto Lance, tackling to the ground. Grabbing the younger boy by the ears and began to bang his head across the carpeted floor.
"Gambit!" Magneto shouted pulling the furious Cajun off the rock tumbler.
"Sacre Bleu! I'll skin him alive and feed his eyes to a chicken!" Gambit screeched. Avalanche merely sneered at him and walked behind Fred.
"Okay, we have two minutes to get onto the plane, so let's go," Mystique said dragging Pyro by the arm. "Did anyone ever tell you, you've got the ass of a god?"
"What?" Remy muttered, "What the hell is going on?"
"How would I know?" Magneto snapped. Remy growled as Blob pushed Mystique out of the way and French-kissed Pyro. Once Pyro got his mouth back he began to spit out the flavour. Only to be sped of into a toilet by Quicksilver.
"Pyro?"
90909090909090909090909
"Pietro, what the hell are you doing?" Pyro said pushing Pietro hard into a toilet. The fast one landed with a splash. Pyro rolled his eyes and ran out of the bathroom right into Wanda. "What!"
Wanda didn't speak but instead pushed Pyro into the wall and began to grope the man. "You've got a sexy body!"
Pietro ran out of the bathroom to his sister's side. "Can I help you Wanda?"
"Yeah why not," Wanda said kissing Pyro's neck, Pietro joined in. Suddenly Remy pushed both Wanda and Pietro off Pyro; he had his metal Bo in his hands and was ready to fight anyone who came near. The twins both growled and got ready to attack but Magneto showed up with Colossus, Sabertooth, Mystique, Toad, Avalanche and Blob.
"Hurry up you lot, the people are boarding the plane," Magneto snapped, handing everyone their ticket. Remy looked down at his and then at Pyro's. They were sitting at least ten seats away from each other. Colossus walked over and looked at Pyro's ticket.
"You are sitting with me, John," Piotr said winking at Pyro, who shuddered. Gambit growled. Toad hoped over.
"Touch him and I'll kill you!" Remy threatened.
"Relax," Toad grinned, "Where are you sitting?"
Pyro and Gambit showed their tickets. Toad grinned.
"Gambit we're next to each other!" Toad said hopping happily.
"Toad, please swap with Pyro?" Gambit begged, "I'll do anything!"
"I'll swap, but you don't gotta do squawt, yo, I owe you anyway," Toad grinned handing Pyro his ticket. Pyro gave his. "Wait who were you sitting next to?"
"Piotr,"
"Oh good, cause if it was Sabertooth," All three shuddered. They followed the group. "Hey what's up with everyone? Why are they all so 'oh Pyro you're so hot yo'?"
"No idea," Gambit growled. Pyro froze uncomfortably. Toad hopped off. "Okay spill it cher what did you do?"
"I asked Wanda for some help, so she gave me a potion to make you fall in love with me," Pyro said softly, "But I think I gave it everyone else instead."
"Fall in love? More like fall in lust!" Gambit snapped, "What made you do something so stupid."
"I- I don't know," Pyro said, as he and Gambit gave their tickets to the man.
"Sir, you can't take that stick into the plane," Gambit growled at the man, and then hit him hard across the head with the bo, he threw it over the metal detector and walked through, catching the stick.
"So why ain't Toad and Maggie affected?" Remy snapped.
"Maybe they don't eat eggs," Pyro sighed as they entered the plane.
"Next time you try to poison me with a potion, make sure you do it right," Gambit snapped, pushing Pyro into their row. Pyro sat on the seat and stared out of the window weakly. He sniffed once or twice when he found Remy's arms around him, "I'm sorry love, but you should know by now that you don't need to poison me to make me love you! I already do!"
"I know," Pyro cried as Remy pulled him into his arms and held him.
90909090909090909090909
Sabertooth sighed as he swallowed another kitty treat that Magneto brought for the flight. He watched Pyro and growled as Remy kissed him. "I'll kill him; yeah that's what I'll do!"
90909090909090909090909
Colossus snarled as Remy and John kept kissing and groping each other, Pyro was his, "I will skin Remy alive, ya that is what I will do!"
90909090909090909090909
Lance and Fred sat next to each other, both snarling as they watched Remy pull John's shirt off, and kissed John's left nipple which was pierced.
"I'm gonna make Remy's world rock, and kill him in the process," Avalanche snarled.
"I'm gonna sit on him," Blob also snarled.
90909090909090909090909
Wanda and Pietro both glared as Remy pulled his own shirt of and began to unbuckle Pyro's pants.
"I'm gonna spin around Gambit so fast, he wont have any oxygen to breathe!" Quicksilver grinned sadistically.
"The I'm gonna hex him to hell!" Scarlet Witch laughed evilly.
90909090909090909090909
Mystique scratched the chair angrily, as Remy unbuckled his own pants.
"I'll shape-shift into a raven and pull his eyes out!"
90909090909090909090909
Toad's mouth fell in shock as Gambit began to pull Pyro's pants off.
"I think I'm gonna faint."
Thud
90909090909090909090909
Magneto sat reading a magazine he brought from the airport.
"Britney Spears: To be married for the eleventh time," Magneto read, "That girl is a bigger slut then that Tabitha Smith girl."
Magneto yawned, looked up and jumped. Pyro and Gambit were going at it on a public plane! Meanwhile his Brotherhood of Acolytes were all glaring dagger at them, or more specifically Gambit- well Toad was asleep or something. "GAMBIT! PYRO! STOP THAT AT ONCE! THERE ARE CHILDREN ON THE PLANE!"
Gambit and Pyro looked around to find mothers glaring at them, and children staring at them in shock. The lover dressed, and braced themself for a boring twenty-eight hour trip top Australia.
90909090909090909090909
Gambit sighed. "Maggie?"
"What?" Magneto snarled
"Are we there yet?" Gambit asked for the hundredth time.
90909090909090909090909
PyroManaic-
Afro: Thank you! My new reviewer
Afro: I don't get how you don't like slash!
Afro: Everyone is entitled to their opinion.
Afro: Yeah but still, its hot to naked sexy men for me to perve at!
Afro: You're sick!
Afro: And your point is?
Afro: Just shut up.
redroe23102:
Afro: Thank you very much. My loyal reviewer.
Afro: 'My Todd is cute', were u been all Todd's are cute!
Afro: Shut the hell up, mumbles even though I agree with you.
Afro: What was that?"
Afro: You're too big a fool.
Afro: oh okay…. She is right though every one appears to be spastics! Specially Pyro, no wonder Gambit don't like him. Only wants him for his body.
Pyro: Wh-what? runs off bawling his eyes, Gambit is shown running after him promising vengeance to Afro
Afro: Kiss my ass!
Afro: You should be kissing Gambits ass.
(Both at the same time)
Afro: mmmm Gambit's ass.
Afro: mmmm Gambit's ass.
Pyro Lady:
Afro: Thank you….My other loyal reviewer.
Afro: Was this quick enough updating?
Afro: Shut up. I've come up with that weird way of making Gambit jealous but I included everyone!
Afro: Cept for Toad and Maggie!
Magneto: Don't call me Maggie!
Afro: What is this, I don't remember asking for interviews with you! First Pyro, and then nice assed Gambit.
Afro: Magneto Buggar of, and Afro shut the hell up! God Dammit, you're making me swear. I don't swear.
Afro: Surrrrre you don't.
Afro: Shut up I'm sorry everyone, but I have an annoying other half to me, the rude annoying Afro…When she is bold you know she is trouble…Italics is the good one
Afro: Gimme a break.
Afro: Shut the hell up. Next chapter.
Afro: Don't tell them what happens swatted across the head with a fly swat thingy
Afro: NEXT CHAPTER they arrive in Australia.
Afro: Well what was the point of that, I'll tell them what really happens
Afro: Okay no you don't get to the PACP already…
Peace and Chicken Grease
Afro! Afro!
Review
Afro: Or else
Afro: Shut the hell up. Stupid bold Afro.
Afro: She loves me!
Afro: Like a wildebeest loves five lions chewing at her feet…
(Who can guess were that quote is from?)
Afro: I knew she loved me!