Title
Coming Back Over the Edge
Arthur
Da Warslayer
Summary
In the end people say that winning is everything. Well I have won every one of my battles why do I feel so empty. Sora is injured from a battle with a heartless and I thinking about how life is going for him. When he remembers his promise. When he goes home will everything be okay, or is the world still moving without him.
Disclaimer
I do not own kingdom hearts, Square-Enix and Disney interactive do, but if I wish upon a star my dream just might come true. (Pinocchio smacks warslayer in the back of the head.) Hey! I also do not own this song, it is sung by Our Lady Peace.
I do own this story, I think, yeah I do, or do I? Hum, think, think, think. Any ways I do not own anything except the story.
A/N
Okay this is my first one shot so flamers are welcome in any shape or form. if you want to say you fuckin suck. that's fucking fine with me you a- oh you didn't say it yey well any well if you read it cause your bored review and say i was bored and read your fic.
On with the Fic
o0()0o
In the end people say that winning is everything. Well I have won every one of my battles why do I feel so empty. Rain was pouring hard on the dark street. I watched lightning hit the clouds, and then vanish, leaving a red orange glow behind. All I could think about was her safety. These feelings inside of me are getting to strong for me to bear.
I felt my eye lids begin to drop. And then I fell into a dreamless abyss.
Dream
Darkness. Clouds flying by. Drifting along the waves. I was alone in another nightmare. Surrounded by nothingness, darkness. A void within a void. I was so lost in my dream of silence that silence was becoming a sound to me. My whole body began to shake uncontrollably like I was having a seizure. I felt like I was in the middle of where dreams, nightmares, and reality meet.
"A meaningless effort."
I heard those words in an echoing voice in the distance. The voices in my dreams were never clear but this one was.
"One who knows nothing, can understand nothing"
The voice began to get louder, and clearer. Like it wanted to be heard and listened to. I looked down at my feet and saw that I was floating on a cloud of darkness. Then I heard the voice continue.
"Tied to the darkness."
I felt the chill of the air glide across my cheek sending a chill down my spine. The voice was dark a menacing.
"Soon to be completely eclipsed."
"there is so much to learn."
"You understand so little."
"A meaningless effort."
"One who knows nothing can understand nothing."
"The heart will return to the darkness whence it came."
"Darkness is life's true essence."
It faded away this time leaving me alone. The sound of silence returned, but it was a New Hope for me.
End DreamMy eyes flew open. I stared at the endless abyss out side, wondering if I was the only one out there. 'Darkness is life's true essence.' Was this a sign on how I am supposed to live my life?
I was sitting against a wall in Traverse Town.
Thinking of my friends that I sacrificed to save Riku. The lost of Goofy and Donald. The ones that understood my need to find my friend; at the cost of everything. I had lost Goofy on my journey to find Riku. We had found a man knowing where the door was. Axel. Axel told us he would help. When we found the door Axel betrayed us. He stabbed a Keyblade strait throw Goofy's armor, splitting his heart in two. I killed Axel yes, but the pain was almost too much to go on. It was a terrible way to die. I knew that Donald could handle it so I had to handle it.
Then I had lost Donald after I had opened the door to save Riku and King Mickey. The door had opened sending herds of heartless out with Riku and King Mickey out with them swinging. The heartless had trampled Donald to where he couldn't fight. Then they devoured his heart. I had fought to get them off but there was too many. I had lost two important people, for what?
I ran my hand threw my blood soaked spiked hair, a broken smile appeared across my face as I remembered what Donald always told me. "Keep smiling." It was hard to smile after I had lost everything. Here I was sitting here waiting for death to take me, waiting to go see my friends. Friends? Kairi. I could return home.
I turned to a cut on my arm. I knew my wounds should hurt a lot more then what they were, but I had lost all hope for anything right now. The blood from the wounds seeped threw my shirt and gradually pooled on the floor. The drip of the blood was silent like everything else around me. I looked back around at the sound of footsteps, nothing.
I felt no pain now, because all was lost and it didn't matter anymore. Everything was gone. I was alone right now and I hated it.
Why now?
Last time I talked to you
You were lonely and out of place
You were looking down on me
Lost out in space
It's been a while hasn't it? Four years, five months, three weeks, four days, fifteen hours, sixteen minutes, and fifty four seconds. I haven't seen her forever it seems, but also like I have always been with her. It feels like she is still in my heart. The last time I talked to her I remembered my promise. Like a broken record repeating over and over again and again in my head, 'I'll come back'. It hurt the thought of leaving her to save Riku. But I heard he had come back two years ago. Making me seem like an ass. Lately I've been thinking about my lost hope, my lost dreams. I thought about how life can do many things for you. Like for me it brought her into my life. My world had changed when I had her in my heart. It was strange feeling her feelings. I feel the darkness rising up my spine ready to take over my mind.
Is this the end?
I felt like I was falling away from my light that held me together. "How can this be my life?" that was the question ramming against my brain over and over, again and again. I felt like I couldn't get out of this world I was in. This mess I am in. Instead of getting out I felt like I was going deeper inside the darkness. I was walking in the dark, blind because I left the damn flashlight in the bathroom after I just took a piss. Hitting every thing on my way back into bed and into safety's arms that are finally stretched out for me. But now I can't feel anything, I can't see anything and I can't touch anything. That hurts. The feeling of not feeling. I pushed off the ground fighting the pain I felt all over my body. I looked up, as the stars seem to swarm in an osmosis of colors. Seeing the complexion of life before my eyes. I started to have a little hope that I could be saved from this life I am living. That there might be hope for me yet.
We laid underneath the stars
Strung out and feeling brave
I watched the red orange glow
I watched you float away
But how was I going to get out of this mess of feelings that I cannot feel. Is it down to this? Making this life make sense to me was hard enough with out the problem, with struggling with these random emotions. But can I do this. Can I make this new life work? Huh, it's funny how a simple thing like life can come so tough and a hard choice like killing comes so easy to me.
I lost my reason to live; I lost that reason for me. A reason to start a new. That reason is gone.
"A meaningless effort. One who knows nothing can understand nothing." I looked at my feet thinking about those words. Ansem once told me these words before he left. "Mean ound me. I was home. I looked around seeing something that made my heart drop. I walked over to the sidewall running my hand over the drawing. There was Kairi and I eating a paopu fruit. I let a smile escape my lips. I felt the pain in my heart when the memory of me leaving her stranded on that beach. How I regretted it. I stepped out of the cave. I looked at the water encircling the island, remembering the last time I saw it. It was a purple darkness. But the thing I noticed most was that there was Kairi on the beach staring into the ocean waiting. I was about to say something when my anger rose at the person who came next. "Kairi he's not coming back." my fist clenched at Riku's words. I watched as Riku wrapped his arms around Kairi and kissed her cheek.
"I know but it doesn't hurt to wish." I felt my heart drop at Kairi's words. She wanted me back. "So he's dead?" she asked Riku as she faced him. Riku nodded.
I turned on the radio
To find you on satellite
I'm waiting for the sky to fall
I'm waiting for a sign
I have been fighting heartless for so long now that those simple words she said made me smile, for real, for the first time in years. She still wishes I were there. Everyday it was the same thing, I wanted to be near her but was afraid she would reject me for leaving her. But, she was waiting for me. My heart began to feel lighter, like I had saved the world another time, but this time I would be able to stay with the one I truly wanted to be with. I looked up at the sky seeing a couple of stars. Then my heart jumped as a cluster of comets passed by Destiny Island leaving a huge blue streak across the night sky. I looked back over to where she was standing, watching the sky for hope. I couldn't keep my eyes off her. I felt something inside… I couldn't hold any more. I give up my life to be with her once. I don't want to loose her again. She looked over at where I was with her smile. This notion made my heart skip a couple of crazy beats.
Did she see me?
"He's gone Kairi." she looked back out at the ocean.
And all we are
Is all so far
"I wouldn't say that." They both turned to see me standing there, staring at them. Riku's eyes widened at the site of me standing there. Kairi ran into my arms and I lifted her off the ground. "I missed you." I said putting her back on the ground.
"Riku said you were dead." Kairi said smiling wide.
"Nope," She smiled grabbing me around the waste bringing pain as she squeezed my cuts. I jerk a little sending her eyes to the cut on my side. "But almost there."
"Your hurt." She put a hand on my cuts healing me slowly. She threw me a smile before she grabbed me and dragged me along.
"Riku, we'll be back we have to catch up.
You're falling back to me
The star that I can see, yeah
I know your out there, Somewhere out there
You're falling out of reach
Defying gravity yeah
I know you're out there, Somewhere out there
We stopped at Paopu Island standing there, staring at the ocean not knowing what to say or feel. Happiness for seeing her, anger for how I left her, sadness that it took me so long, guilt for being happy while my friends were gone. I didn't know what to feel. But, I grinned after a long moment and Kairi's cheeks where shaded pink. She smiled then immediately wrapped her arms around my neck whispering in my ear how she missed me. I returned her embrace tightly closing my eyes not wanting this moment to pass me by. I laughed as I gave her back a few strokes. My eyes met her and I saw the happiness of her soul pouring out into mine eyes, I saw the smile I missed, the smile she had when we were fourteen returning to her face, not in a dream but in reality. "God, I missed you Kairi." I finally let out as I choked back the tears that were caught in my throat.
"Sora…" she whispered gently, I didn't want to move "Sora what took you? What have you been doing all your life?"
I felt like I shouldn't answer her but those eyes.
"Running," I said hoping to get off the subject, "The same as I am today."
"What else, we shouldn't keep secrets from each other."
I lifted an eyebrow to the brownish red head smiling at me. "Everyone keeps secretes Kairi."
"Yeah, but you were never good at it." If I weren't trying to stay off the subject I would have noticed Kairi looking at me. "Why now?"
"I don't know." I leaned against a tree and Kairi leaned beside me and said nothing. Eventually I broke the silence. "Looks like you won't go away until I tell you huh." She giggled and nodded. I started to take a deep breath.
Her gaze was confused and concern contemplating my every move. "Are you Ok Sora?"
"Sure, you wanted to here what I have been doing?"
"Yeah."
"Well, I have heard a man say once that the only thing necessary for failure is for men to do nothing. Nothing? That was something I was doing. Nothing but running."
"That was what you had to do."
"Was it? I can't stand running from something. I was falling into a black hole, an endless abyss. I knew it was coming, I knew hell would rise from under me."
"You knew what was coming?"
"That I would fall-" I stopped my choice of words. I knew she wanted me here but was it the way I wanted to be here? "-fall doing my job. I wanted to stay on Destiny Island. But I didn't want those feelings any more; I didn't want the pain of loosing someone. When I arrived here that's when it began to hurt on the inside. That's when I knew the true meaning of hope. I could run. Sitting on this mountain of disgrace and hope." I looked at Kairi my sapphire eyes hoping she understood. "I took defeat, falling into the air, breathing the dust, then hitting hard.
"Knowing that I may have never got back up. Taking defeat can take courage though. As I sat against that crate at Traverse Town, I looked around, as I harvested the pain from losing you, I looked at my life and realized it's just plain. That doesn't fit for a person like me, it makes me feel like a waste of space. With no importance." I raised my hand to the back of my neck and started rubbing. "The funny thing is, I was lost. Lost in where I was in the world."
It was silent for awhile. Then I broke the silence "I know I'm not a perfect person, there are things I wish I didn't do. I wanted to prove to myself that I could be useful. When I came to Hallow Bastion all I was thinking was getting you back no matter what. And then I left you, and I am sorry for that.
"I am going threw life writing his story. I am choosing my course. I am choosing my life's story. I look at you and wonder what you are going to put in my empty pages. My hope? Because in the end it leads to one thing… this is my story, I will write it how it should be."
Kairi just looked at the ground. Then we both looked at the stars wondering how life can be so cruel.
Hope you remember me
When you're home sick and need a change
I miss your purple hair
I miss the way you taste
I know you'll come back some day
On a bed of nails I wait
I'm praying that you don't burn out or fade away
I looked up the tree I was leaning on seeing that it had one paopu fruit left. I quickly got on the tree and started to yank at the fruit. "What are you doing?" Kairi giggled.
I jumped down with a smile across my face as I broke the fruit in half. "For you." I said giving her one half. She looked down at the ground as we ate the fruit, not saying a word. I smiled and brushed a strand of hair away from her face and lifted her head to face me. Her cheeks were stained with red. I switch my gaze to the ground and then back at her. The moon shined across her face making her prettier then ever. She smiled up at the stars and I couldn't help but wonder if she was smiling at me or something else instead. She reminds me of an angel, an angel who had been clipped from her wings. Her smile lingered for a while staring at the sky with the moon showing her features better. She truly was an angel, bringing me happiness, joy, and just making me into the man I am today.
I leaned in for a kiss but then changed my motives, and pulled her into an embrace. If it were any other girl I would have thrown my lips on her, but with Kairi it was different. It meant something to me, she meant something to me.
And all we are
Is all so far
"Sora?" her hair started to fall as she spoke my name, "Riku." The name stung. She was thinking of him not me. I was too late.
"Oh." I pulled away from her. "Yeah sorry." I rubbed the back of my head a little to rough but the hurt emotion took the pain from my neck and stabbed it in my heart. "I shouldn't of come back, I'm…I'm sorry." I walked back off the island feeling the rain hit me hard, or was that the pain of rejection. I walked along the beach my head hung low, wanting the pain to stop. I stuffed my hands into my pockets and turned to face the ocean. "Destiny Island, is this my destiny?"
Memories rushed threw my head. "Sora, don't ever change."
Was that why she didn't want me? Di Somewhere out there
The sound of rain echoed behind me as I stared at the endless sea. I probably wouldn't have been in this mess if…how stupid could I be to think, no to believe she would wait all those years. I felt darkness's cold death like fingers take hold of me. I exhaled a deep breath letting my emotions escape, convincing myself that it was over.
"Sora!" I turned to see nothing, but I realized I should keep my other promise before I left, and the thing I have been questioning all these years. The thing I always kept by my heart. My head lowered in shame as I cursed myself for believing. I started to walk back to the island when I felt the wind get knocked out of me.
You're falling back to me
The star that I can see
I know your out there, oh!
Your falling out of reach
Defying gravity
I know you're out there, Somewhere out there
At first I didn't know what quite to do. I looked down to see Kairi holding me as tightly as she could. "Kairi?" she didn't move. The rain slid down my face, hitting my face, matching the rhythm of her heartbeat.
"Don't leave me again." I looked down into her ocean gems, as her thin arms tightened around me. Then her arms moved to around my neck. I wrapped my arms around her waste.
"Never." My smile came back across my face as I brushed a loose strain of wet hair behind her ear. Tears started to stream down her face. I swiftly wiped them away, actually making her face wetter then it already was. then I felt her rise on her tippy toes, her face getting closer to mine. Then my lips touched hers. I was kissing her. I pulled her in tightly not wanting to ever let go. Not this moment, not her. I felt her legs begin to shake, and as they gave out I tightened my hold on her. Not ever would I let her fall. I pulled away softly seeing her smile. I stuck my hand in the inside of my jacket pocket. I pulled out a black velvet box and fell to one knee. Then I spoke the words I have been dying to say
"Kairi would you marry me?"
Your falling back to me
The star that I can see yeah
I know your out there, Somewhere out there
Your falling out of reach
Defying gravity yeah
I know you're out there, Somewhere out there
She jumped into my arms knocking me over so that she lay on top of me pinning me down. She stared at me as we laughed not breaking eye contact. "Guess that's a yes?"
"No," she lowered her face closer to mine, "This is a yes." And once again her lips touched mine, melting me into her light as our hearts became one. That was when I refound my light and my way out of the darkness. I found my reason to live; I finally found that reason for me. A reason to start a new. That reason is Kairi.
You're falling back to me
I know, I know
You're falling out of reach, oh!
I know...