New chapter's here... this is longer than the usual... but I know a lot of people (specially the ones who had been following this story at FB) has waited for this one a long time... so enjoy it and remember to leave me a review ;)



~~~Overcoming the lonelyness - Chapter 6 (8 years ago)~~~

Monica stood by Rachel's father side at the airport as she waited for her friend's arrival. Since they'd barely seen each other the previous year Monica had decided to enjoy every single moment she could with her friend, so she had begged her parents to let her go the airport to wait for her, they had told her the only way she could go was if Ross went with her. For some weird reason beyond Monica's understanding, her brother hadn't wanted to go, but still drove her to the airport to make their parents believe he was going with her. Monica knew her brother had a girlfriend now, and she couldn't spect him to react the way he used to do a year ago when it came to spend some time with Rachel. He always gave her the impression that he had feelings for her friend, but now that he was with Carol he barely named Rachel's, in fact, she didn't remember him talking about her the whole year.

"Your brother isn't coming, right Monica?" asked all of the sudden Dr Green. There was something very intimidating about that man thought Monica.
"No sir... why would he?" she asked, unaware of her brother and her friend history
"Yeah... why would he... I'm happy to know that they stoped that sillyness... like they could fall in love in two months"
"Fall in love?" asked Monica confused "Ross and Rachel?"
"Well... at least that was what he told me... I still believe it was only a summer fling, but I prefer my daughter to focus on living a normal life, and that kid wasn't doing any good to her" he replied firmly.
In love? Ross and Rachel? Kept asking Monica in her head. Now everything was falling into the right place, the look on Ross' face when she named Rachel, the sadness in her friend's voice everytime she asked her about him, everything made sense now... specially since Rachel's father had forced them to break up. She hadn't told her friend Ross had a girlfriend, basically because she had forgotten, now that she thought about it, it was a good thing she didn't... it would have killed Rachel if she had told her over the phone... at lease now she'd have her shoulder to cry on. But why didn't they tell her anything? There had to be something else there? Rachel would have to answer a lot of questions that evening.

"Hey daddy!!" greeted Rachel with a huge grin on her face
"Hello princess" greeted back Leonard Green "Look who's here with me"
"Hey Rach!" said softly Monica, still processing all the information she had jus gotten
"I'm so happy you're here!!" replied Rachel hugging her friend "Is Ross comming too?" she asked smiling
"No sweety" hurried to say Dr Green "he's out with her girlfriend, right Monica?"
"Girl... girlfriend?"
Monica nodded "Yes sir" she replied...
"Since... since when does Ross has a girlfriend?" asked Rachel, fighting her tears
"Since two months" answered Monica
"Ok... we can carry on this conversation at home... we better get going"
Monica shoot Dr Green a look he didn't saw, wondering how could he be so cruel? Didn't he see that Rachel was broken? The news had been too much for her and he didn't even care. She always thought the relationship between Rachel and her father was desirable, but now she wasn't so sure anymore, how could he be so selfish?. Monica hugged her friend after they started walking outside the airport, she could feel how her friend was crying inside.

Rachel still held the hope that everything had been just a bad dream, a misunderstanding that would be fixed once she got back. Ross didn't call her the whole year, but that was ok, the year after that he didn't call her either and they ended up spending a wonderful summer together. The past 10 months she had thought why wouldn't he wanted to be with her, and the only expalanition she found was because he was scared of the 10 moths they would spent apart. She knew he loved her, she could feel it everytime he looked at her and everytime he kissed her, he didn't need to tell her a thing, she knew it because she felt it too.
But all her hopes had crushed down now that she knew Ross had a girlfriend. She started questioning everything she was so sure about and her world trumble. She'd only loved one guy, she'd only kissed one guy and that guy had now another girlfriend... this was much more than she can handle.

*~*

"Why didn't you tell me my brother and you were dating?" was the first thing Monica asked once Rachel and her were left alone in her friend's bedroom
"What?" asked Rachel surprised
"You and my brother. Why didn't you tell me? I thought we could trust each other with everything"
"Monica, I really don't know what you're talking about" lied Rachel. The truth was, she didn't feel capable of talking about Ross in that very same moment.
"Rachel, stop lying to me! Your father told me while we were waiting for you, and I saw the expression on your face when he said Ross had a girlf..."
"I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT, OK?" yelled Rachel "I'm... I'm sorry... I'm just tired... the fly and everything... I... am sorry"
"It's ok Rach... I am the one who should be sorry... you're hurt... i can see it in your eyes... i shouldn't had brought it up all of the sudden... it's just that... well... you and my brother... that's huge. But if you don't want to talk about it that's ok too" said Monica, realizing Rachel needed a friend more than a lecture.
Rachel looked down, avoiding Monica's gaze. She needed to get it out, for a whole year she had been holding it all inside and she felt she couldn't do it anymore. "He said he didn't want to be with me" she finally spoke, her voice cracking as the tears left her eyes and rolled down her cheeks.
"What? Why? Did he give you any kind of explanation?" asked Monica sitting at her friend's side
Rachel's eyes were fixed on the floor as she played with her hands like she normally did when she was nervous. Explanation? He didn't care enough to give her an explanation, she thought. The last 10 months she had been waiting for Ross' call to tell her he was sorry, to tell her he had been thinking about her all the time like she had been thinking about him, that he loved her, and no other girl could ever replace her, but nothing. Every single night she had drifted to sleep reasuring herself that tomorrow was gonna be the day, but the day never came. Explanation? Now she knew there was just one. For him, she had been just a game.
"No" she answered softly, as she felt how the anger and the pain filled her "he didn't care and I don't care either" she added strongly, wiping the tears from her eyes and standing up "Now can we please talk about something else?"
"But Rach..."
"No 'buts' Monica... I'm really ok now... I... I don't need him. Beside, it wasn't like I was in love with him or anything. He was just a summer fling" lied Rachel, trying to convince her friend and also herself

*~*

"How is she?" was the first thing Ross asked her sister when he picked her up from Rachel's, as he looked at the building, trying to look into Rachel's father apartment, like if from where he was standing he could get a look of the 9th floor, longing to see her more than anything in the world.
"She's... tired" replied Monica without looking straight at him. She was too disapointed of her brother, she knew she'd end up screaming at him and it wasn't the right place to do that.
"I can imagine..." he replied, giving up in his attempt of looking at Rachel's place and noticing the weird look on Monica's face as she got into the car. "What?"
"You can imagine huh?..." she asked as he got into the car too, avoiding his eyes
"Yeah well... it is a long trip, she must be exhausted" he replied without understanding the tone in his sister's voice
"Yeah?... really? Can you also imagine how hurt she is? Or how betrayed she feels?... CAN YOU EVEN START IMAGINATING?!!" she finally screamed, leting go all her frustration and anger
"Wha... what?"
"Rachel told me..." Monica's voice was harsh and distant
"She did..." asked Ross, not knowing what else should he say. He still felt dissapointed and disgusted with himself for what he did to Rachel, but a whole year had passed by and it was too late to take away the words already spoken.
"How could you?" asked Monica, Ross could fell her anger and disapointing towards him. He could feel it cause he was feeling exactly the same "You played with her, broke her heart and now you're sitting there like nothing happened, asking me how is she? My God... I don't know my own brother. I never thought you were like this"
"I didn't play with her!" replied Ross hurt
"You didn't huh? Then what the hell happened?"
"I... I... I don't want to talk about it, ok? Now i have to drive you home cause later tonight I have a date with Carol"
"Don't even mention her"
"Hey... this whole thing has nothing to do with her, ok?"
"I know it's all YOUR fault... but still... you know what... I don't even wanna talk to you anymore"
"Why don't you stop butting in mine and Rachel's issues... this is not your problem" said Ross, starting to get pissed too
"You know why I butt in? Cause she's my friend... and there's a chance she won't come back here next year just because of you, jackass. If I lose my best friend because of you I'll never forgive you... so as you can see this IS MY GOD DAMN BUSSINESS!" yelled her, finally crying, feeling betrayed by her brother.
"Mon... Mon... I swear that wasn't my intention... I didn't want to hurt her... I would never do that in propose" said Ross, trying to calm his sister, resting his head in the wheel, he didn't want her to see the tears filling his eyes. "I still have feelings for her ok... but now I really, really don't want to talk or even think about it, alright?. At least not tonight"
Ross started the car without giving Monica another look, driving away from Rachel's father's building, trying to scape what he was feeling that very same moment: regret, guilt, pain, sorrow and emptyness.

*~*

Ross looked at the sky feeling like the smallest being in the Universe. The inmensisity of the sky amazed him. The sparks from the stars gave him the willing to go on, and the early July breeze encourage him to do what he was about to do. He couldn't keep lying to himself, but above all things he couldn't keep lying to her, she didn't deserve it.
He stood in front of her building and sighed. He needed to talk to her now, to solve this whole mess once and for all, cause he didn't want to live his life with the thought of something that could have been but it wasn't just because he was to affraid to even try it, too affraid to stand up for what he really wanted, too coward to actually reach for his dreams.

*~*

Rachel sat on her father's balcony looking at the park like she had done the past two weeks. Monica called her everyday to invite her to do something different, but she always turned her down. Her mood wasn't for anything excepet sitting there watching other people enjoying their free time, specially during a beautiful night like this one. She liked to watch the couples who walked down the park holding hands, just looking at the stars above them. Sharing kisses and moments that were only theirs under the moonlight. She couldn't stop thinking about Ross and all those dates that ended up down there, like that young couple she had been watching for a while. They were lying on the ground kissing, not noticing the look on everybody's faces as they walked by them. A bittersweet smile appeared on Rachel's face, a year ago that couple had been her and Ross, they could keep kissing for hours, cause everytime they did the time stood still, it never got boaring, it only got better.
Being in England knowing that Ross didn't want to be with her had been hard, but she still could pretend it wasn't true, that Ross would be waiting for her when she came down the plane like he promised last year, and they would resume their love put in hold the previews summer. But being here and having to face reality was worst than she thought. It hurted her like nothing she had felt before. Her heart, her body, her head and her sould were aching, longing to see Ross again, to be kissed by him and to be held so close like only he could. But also feling the need to hate him for leaving her alone in that place, for trading her so easily, for broken his promises and simply for not being that couple in the park once again.

"Niña Rachel" Rosa, her father's maid and her nanny when she was a child, interrupted her thoughts "your friend is here to see you"
Rachel didn't even turn aroud, she didn't want to be bother, she wanted to be left alone with her thoughts and her self-pity. But she had treated Monica awfully this past two weeks, nothing of this was her fault yet Rachel had walked away from her too. "Tell her to come in" she said resuming her study of the kissing couple from the park.
"Yes niña" replied Rosa flashing a sympathetic smile to the girl she once held in her harms and now had become a woman.
Rachel felt how the door to his father's room closed behind Rosita and a couple of minutes later opened once again. She kept looking at the park while she heard someone coming into the balcony and standing behind the chair she was siting. She turned around to greet Monica, but instead of her she saw Ross, standing there, just looking at her.

"Hey Rach" he said, lost for words, amazed by her beauty that seemed to be incresed by the moon light
"What are you doing here?" asked Rachel coldly "I thought it was Monica, if I knew it was you I wouldn't had let you come in"
"I know I deserve that... but we need to talk" he answered, approaching to her as she took a few steps back.
"I think you made things pretty clear the last time we talked" Rachel turned around, she didn't want him to see the tears forming in her eyes.
"Rach... let me explain..."
"No!" she cut him off "It's too late now Ross... I don't want to hear any explanation. I don't need it. I understand what happened. I was a game, a summer fling, you got boared of me and that's ok. Now could you please leave me alone?"
"What?! A game?! No Rachel... never... you know I'm like that" he answered, hurt by Rachel words.
"I don't know anything about you anymore... I thought I did... but clearly I didn't"
Ross sighed, he wouldn't give up so easily "What I said... I didn't mean it"
Rachel let go a sarcastic laugh "Great explanation!" she said, still not facing him, still looking at that couple that had everything she once had
"I know it's lame but it's true... I was...I was... scared. I was a coward. It was easier to run away from what I was feeling than to face it"
"Then why the hell did you say it?" she asked, finally turning around, but without looking at him into the eyes. "Why didn't you call me the whole year? Why didn't you go to pick me up from the airport like you promised?" she was defenetly crying now. "And why do you have a girlfriend?" she added softly between snobs.
Ross felt his heart squeezing. Seeing Rachel crying because of him made him hate and feel disgusted with himself. "I'm... I'm sorry... I made a horrible mistake and I'm sorry... I just can't live knowing that I let you go because of fear"
Rachel sat on her chair again and looked away, tears were still falling down her cheeks. She saw the couple from the park standing up and walking away, leaving the park and finally disapearing from her gaze. She looked up at Ross and asked softly: "what about your girlfriend?"
"She's a good girl, and she cares about me a lot" he replied, kneeling in front of her "I just needed to prove myself I was over you, I though that way I could stop thinking about you. As you can see... it didn't work" he added with a small laugh "Rach... not a day has passed by that I haven't regreted saying what I said, blaming myself for being such a coward, for not being a man and standing up for us" he lowed his head, feeling Rachel's eyes fixed on him. After being silent for a while he lift his head and looked at Rachel straight into her eyes for the first time in the whole night "I love you. I know it's hard to believe and to understand since we've been together just for two summers, we've been apart more than we've been together. But I can't help ot. You're in my heart, in my soul... in everyone of my dreams, and I don't wanna be with anyone else. I'm tired of lying to myself, you or anyone else, denying feelings I can't hide just because I'm too affraid to face them" Ross looked down and then up again, looking one more time for her eyes "I'm not asking you for a second chance, I just want your forgiveness"
Rachel was speechless, she knew Ross was talking from his heart. "Why... Why did you tell me you didn't want to be with me then?" she asked softly, lost in his eyes, trying hard not to cave into the temptation of kissing him, at least not until she had understood everything.
Ross sighed and once again looked down, Rachel could tell he was nervous "Well... I told you... I was scared"
"Scared of what?"
"Everything was happening so fast... and then... and then your dad..."
"My... my daddy?" what does he have to do in all this?"
"Let's just say he's not very fond of me" he said smiling weakly, not wanting to break Rachel's idealized image of her father "the day we talked he remarked a few points about our relationship... and at the moment I thought he was right... I guess... probably because I still think you're too good for me" he didn't want her to notice how vulnerable he felt, he had emptyed his soul in front of her, not liking the feeling of not being the strongest one.
She made him lift his head and look into his eyes "See what happens when you let your fears guide you. Sometimes you just have to let your heart take the lead" she said placing one of her hands on his chest "Promise me you're gonna let your heart lead when it comes to us" she added smiling
"So... there's gonna be an us again?" he asked smiling, his eyes sparkling with happyness
"Then only thing you need to know is that I don't like broken promises... I've had enough of those for a lifetime"
"Done" he said smiling widely as he helped her to stand up from the chair
"And no lies" she added
"Not a single one ever again"
"And no other girlfriends... wich it means you'll have to break up with... what's her name?"
"Carol"
"Argh... I don't like that name"
"Don't worry about her Rach" said Ross, trying to contain the laughter after that little jealousy outbrust "I'm breaking up with her as soon as I get out of here"
"Ok... ok... you better... And one last thing" she pressed her head against his chest while he wrapped his amrs around her. Being on his arms felt so good, specially when it was the one thing she had missed for the last 10 months "You have to promise me you'll call me everyday when I get back to England, and you'll go to say goodbye to me and then to pick me up next year"
"Promised" he said smiling back
Both remained locked on a sweet hug and on a deeply look. Both lost in each other, enjoying just being there, glad that the whole mess was already fixed and wishing they'd never have to go through something like that again. Little did they know.
"Are you planing on kissing me like... ever?" she finally asked
He smiled and nodded, leaning in, leaving all his fears behind. The moment his lips touched hers he forgot about Carol, England, Rachel's father and the horrible 10 months he had lived without her. Both felt like nothing could go wrong now and willing to take whatever that was on their way, facing it all together.

*~*

"Are you going out princess?" Dr. Green asked Rachel, who was running from her room to the bathroom every 5 minutes.
"Ye... yes daddy" replied her from her bedroom door.
"That's great!" he exclamed happily "I told you you were goin to get over that kid quickly"
"Mmmm..." Rachel didn't know if she should tell her father she was going out with that kid.
"And who are you going out with darling?"
"Mo... Monica" she lied. She hated lying, but this time there wasn't another choice. It was her first official date with Ross since they got back together and all she wanted was this night to be perfect, explaining everything to her father would mean a lecture wich she didn't have time for, specially since she still hadn't picked her outfit for the date.
"And where are you going?"
"I... I don't... I don't know" she replied re-entering her room one more time
"You two can come back here if you want... I'm not going to be home, I have to stay overnight at the hospital"
"Ok... I'll tell her"
"I can call her parents if you want"
"No-no-no-no-no" she cut him off running from her room with another t-shirt "daddy... seriously… you know her parents don't have problems with that... even if we call them later... beside, we still don't know what are we gonna do"
"Ok princess... have fun then... and don't fall asleep too late, ok?"
"I won't"
"Do you need me to drive you somewhere?" he offered
"No thank you... we'll... we'll be meeting here in half hour"
"Ok... say hello to your friend for me, alright sweetheart?"
"Of course daddy"
"Bye bye"

Leonard Green kissed her daughter goodbye and left the building. He felt kind of worried for his baby who was growing up so fast. He knew if it wasn't that Ross guy it was going to be someone else, but he was determinated in not letting any guy even come close to his daughter. He had seen it, working in a public hospital for so many years he had seen all those young women ruining their life because of irresponsable boyfriend, having babies when they could barely take care of themselves, girls even younger that Rachel living a life without future, left alones in a world where it wasn't very likely to survive when you're 15 and have a baby. He wasn't gonna allow his daughter to go through all that, not if he could do something about it.

*~*

The rest of the summer went by almost the same way the last one for Ross and Rachel, kisses, laughter, dates, shared dreams, everything under Leonard Green nose... Ross didn't want Rachel to tell him they were back together, and Rachel didn't want to have a fight with her daddy. The days went by hanging out at Ross and Chandler's place with Monica, her boyfriend, Chandler and his girlfriend, or at the coffee house where the coffee wasn't much but the talk was huge. This summer remained in Rachel's head like one of the best summers of her life... absolutely better than the last one cause now she had Monica to hang out and didn't have to feel embarassed of being so in love with Ross cause she knew he was feeling the same.
The month and a half went by almost as a blink, everyday being better than the last one, archiving new levels of entertainment and new horizonts of love.

"Ok... I have a question to ask you" said Monica one night she was staying at Rachel's place, her last night in the city
"Of course, you can ask whatever you want"
"Ok... ok... but first of all... if the answer is yes then please... no details... ok.... here I go" rambled nervously Monica
"Come on Mon... you can ask me"
"Ok... I'm gonna do it... yes... I'm gonna do it... here I go.... have you and my brother... you know... have.... you know.... sex... already?"
"Not yet" answered quickly Rachel, also feeling kind of nervous about the subject "I know he's the one I wanna do it with... but I don't know if I'm ready yet... Have you and Bryan?"
"Well… kinda... actually... not yet... but I don't know"
"I think you have to do it with a guy you feel something for... you'll know when the time is right, and when the guy is right"
"This whole thing with you and my brother is so romantic... I wish I could fall like that"
"But you can... what about Chandler?"
"What about him?"
"You had a crush on him, remember? He may be the one"
"Nah... Chandler is just... you know... Chandler... my friend... he's sweet and all... but I don't think he's the one, beside... he has a girlfriend... annoying as she is, but he seems to like her... and I have a boyfriend too"
"Come on, Chandler's girlfriend is not annoying, you are just jealous" said Rachel tissing her friend
"I'm not jealous, beside... I have Brian. And Kathy is annoying, specially if you compare her with Carol, she's a real sweetheart"
Rachel's expression change as she gave Monica a killer look. The Carol issue had been hunting her the whole summer. Most of the time she didn't think about it, but as soon as something remind her of that other girl her whole mood change.
"I'm sorry" said Monica, noticing Rachel's look "I was joking Rach... I didn't mean to..."
"Right"
"What?... come on... you know my geek brother loves you, you just said it"
"Yeah i know" said softly Rachel as she looked down "but I can't help it... I'm gonna be away for 10 months... and she's gonna be here... and... and probably Ross will feel lonely... and..."
"Don't even think about it... he wouldn't do that to you"
"You think?"
"I know"
"Thanks Mon" said Rachel hugging her friend, still scared for the forthcoming 10 months

*~*

Rachel looked around. Monica, Chandler and her father were at the airport, as well as a thousand other people, but Ross was nowhere to be seen. She kept telling herself he was gonna show up, he had promised, he had swore.

"He's gonna come" Monica whispered to Rachel as she reisurely hold her hand "he told me this morning, he just didn't want to get here at the same time your father did... you know"
"Yeah I know... I just want to see him, you know. We're gonna be apart for 10 months"
"I know sweety"
"What are you girls whispering?" asked Chandler
"Have you talked to Ross?" asked back Monica
"Yeah... he's on his way here Rach, don't worry... he probably went to pick a bone or something like that" Rachel and Monica gave him a weird look "You know... so you can have something to remember him by" both kept looking at him weirdly "you girls wouldn't know a good joke even if it hits you in the face"

Rachel kept looking around while her father went to get some sodas for the kids, as he called them, and some coffee for him. Leonard Green always liked to arrive one hour later, so he would have more time to say goodbye to his baby.

She had to be on the plane in 25 minutes and Ross still didn't show up. 20 mintues. 15 minutes. 10 minutes. Rachel saw her father coming back but still no signals of Ross. She felt how the tears started to gather in her eyes as time went by.
Rachel looked at her watch once again. 5 minutes. "I need to sit" she said
Monica and Chandler exchanged worried looks, none of them knew what was happening or where the hell Ross was. "Relax hon, he's gonna be here soon" said Monica "he better be" she added in her head.

"I think you better get going Princess" said Rachel's father
Rachel looked around one more time and sighed. Ross wasn't anywhere. She walked to Chandler and hugged him, feeling how her heart was starting to ache... Ross had failed her, she couldn't believe it.
Then she walked to Monica and hugged her deeply, she felt a knot forming in her throat as she let one single tear scape from her eyes "it's gonna be ok sweety, I'm gonna kick his damn ass" her friend whispered.
Finally, she hugged and kissed her father before taking to her purse and walking to the gate. She once again looked around but no one looked remotely like Ross. She smiled weakly to her father and then waved to her friends before start walking away.

Before she turned around to the boarding area she looked back one more time. But it was helpless. She lowed her head as tears came down her cheeks, he hadn't came. She walked through the boarding area with her head fixed on the floor, she didn't have to go to the plane right away, so she sitted on a chair as she played with her hands.
A minute later she felt how a person sat next to her but she didn't give it much importance, when the person placed a red rose in her hands she lift her head and saw Ross sitted next to her, smiling. Without saying a word she throw herself to his arms before placing a kiss on his lips

"I thought you weren't comming" she said when they broke the kiss
"I just didn't want to get in trouble with your dad... I'm sorry for not telling you"
"It's ok..." she said before sighing "I was so... so... dissapointed"
"I'm sorry sweety"
"But you're here now... and we still have 20 minutes before the plane take off"
"I know..."
"How did you get in here anyway?" she asked him as he still held her close
"Well... I'm not telling you that... this was a surpised I had planned for a while"
"You never stop amazing me"
"That's the idea"
"I love you"
"I love you too" she replied before kissing him one more time.

To be continue...

That's if for this chapter... pretty sweet... isn't it? actually this one was just a filler... a few things you needed to know for future chapters... nothing else... but still... please REVIEW... you know how much I love knowing what you think