Hey People! OHMY GOSH I AM SOOOOOOOO SORRY FOR TAKING FOREVER! Well here's what's been going on! I've been trying to get my driver's permit, I've been looking for scholarships and I've applied to a college, but they've still not responded. ; So I figure I work on my stories again! YEAAAAAAAAA Well last time we left off Kamui has been reunited with Fuuma and Kotori, oh and Subaru and Sei-chan are dead. (cries) and in this chapter people are going to be fighting over Kamui, and Kotori is kidnapped O.O
Disclaimer! I NO OWN X
CHAPTER 5 THE FIGHT OVER THE PRETTY BOY AND THE KIDNAPPING FO THE LITTLE BIRD.
"Kamui…You've really returned?" said Fuuma.
"Yes I have," replied Kamui.
"Kamui…" blushed Kotori.
"Oh wait I should do my introduction!" shouted Kamui.
"Huh?" said both Fuuma and Kotori.
Kamui throws Kotori into the air and he starts his weird posses, and odd speeches. "Who is the prettiest CLAMP boy ever drawn? Who can out run a rabid fangirl and leap over Tokyo Tower with a single bond?" (strikes a sailor moon pose)
Fuuma: (sweatdrops)
Kotori: KAMUI!
"That's right. I Kamui am that boy. And now to catch Kotori, and do another Sailor Moon pose with her in my arms." As Kamui held out his arms to catch the little bird, Kotori just happen to land in a tree about 10YARDS away from Kamui.
Kotori: Owww .
Kamui: O.o Sorry!
"Hey Kamui staring contest!" shouted Fuuma.
"Okay," replied Kamui, and the contest began, and all of a sudden, they both got headaches," I need Advil!" (AN: and so do I) Then the sakura petals started sworming in again out of no where, and Kamui realized he was now floating above the stars, and behind him was a crystal earth, with a little person inside of it," What is that?" Kamui asked himself.
"Kamui please you must help us!" cried the person inside the glass earth.
"Hey awesome it's a jawbreaker!" Kamui grabbed the earth and was getting ready to put it in his mouth when, the little person inside shouted "STOOOOOOPP!"
"Huh? Who are you," asked the confused boy.
"My name is Hinoto! And I am the leader of the Dragons of Heaven," has a tear drop go down her face," Kamui please you must help us. You are the chosen one to lead us into battle with the Dragons of Earth," cried the little prophet.
"What? Oh great another one! Listen I told my mom, the press, and CLAMP I don't want to save the world!" shouted the angry pretty boy.
"Okay then Kamui I shall show you what will become of the earth if you don't help us!" said Hinoto as she put a vision into Kamui's head.
"What is this trash dump?" asked Kamui.
"This so called trash dump is Tokyo. Well it will be Tokyo if you don't help me and the other members of the Dragons of Heaven."
"But why should I care! I mean the earth will end with or without my help, so why should I care so much?"
"Because Kamui if you don't help us all there will be no more sakura petals, and happy fields, and peaceful meadows with feather for you to frolic in, to sing and dance!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Kamui's screams were so loud it shattered the glass earth, and the vision sending Hinoto back to the diet building where the other members of the Dragons of Heaven are waiting for her to come back.
"Princess Hinoto!" shouted Karen, Yuzariha, Aoki, Sorata, and Arashi.
"I'm okay," said Hinoto, "kamui's screams of terror just sent me flying back here."
"so is that guy really Kamui?" Yuzariha, as she stuck pocky sticks up her nose, "how much older then me is he?"
"He's about two years older then you," replied Sorata.
"Oh not my type then! Aoki!"
"No I have a wife and daughter, I've told you that since the day we met!"
"Oh darn it!"
"So that boy is really Kamui?" asked Arashi.
"Yes he is, and you need a bath!" shouted Hinoto.
"Oh cram it! Everyone is always getting after me, and how I smell. I smell like a basket of roses!"
"Yea, OLD ROSES!" shouted Karen.
"SHUT UP YOU SLUT!"
"Hey what about Subaru!" shouted the pocky child," He's older then me and single!"
"Oh I forgot to mention Subaru is dead," said Hinoto.
"NOOOOOOOOOO!" screamed Yuzariha.
Everyone: (sweatdrop)
Back at the shrine Kotori and Fuuma, are wondering why Kamui is in the fetal position and crying about no more sakura petals, fields and meadows.
"Kamui-chan?"
"Kamui-kun"
"No more flowers, and feathers, and happiness all gone, but I DON'T WANT TO FIGHT!"
"Huh a fight? Why would Kamui be fighting?" asked Kotori.
"Oh it's that fight to decide the fate of the earth, duh sis," explained Fuuma.
"Huh? How do you know all this stuff?" asked Kotori.
"I don't know! So leave me alone about if or I'll put you on a metal cross and stab you in the heart, and chock you into little pieces!" screamed Fuuma.
Kotori started crying as it started to rain, "Hey it's raining?"
"Rain yes let's play in the rain!" shouted Kamui as he started jumping up and down but got cut on the rain," Ow that hurt! ACK I'M BLEEDING CALL THE AMBULANCE!"
"Let's just get inside!" said Fuuma, and everyone started to run towards the house but then the rain stoped.
"Oh no the rain stopped! I don't wanna die I don't wanna die. I'm dying I'm melting melting melting!" screamed Kamui.
"No you're not melting you dumb baka!" said a voice.
"Who's there?" asked Fuuma.
"Why it is I the replacement!" and the Kakyou replacement, "and this is the clone!"
"DADDY!" shouted the clone as he/she jumped down to hug Fuuma.
Fuuma: WTF?
Clonie: But daddy it's me!
Replacement: BAKA HE'S OUR DADDY IN THE SERIES NOT THE MOVIE!
Clonie: Oh never mind then (jumps back on the roof)
"We came here to get Kamui! Now hand him over or we will be forced to use our powers against you!"
(Somewhere up in the realm of the dead)
Sei-chan: Haha the replacement said 'came'. (AN: use your imaginations)
"What kind of powers do you have?" asked Kotori.
"I use this pretty cloth," said Clonie.
"And I have a water gun of DEATH!" (squirts it)
Fuuma, Kamui, and Kotori sweat drop.
"Ha some powers!" said a voice in the background.
"Who's there?" asked replacement.
"Why it is us the Dragons of Heaven and we came here to get Kamui!" said Sorata.
"Great more people who want me!" pouted Kamui.
The replacement and Clonie jump off the roof, and grab Kamui's arm, "No he's ours and you can't have him! NAHHH (does the Japanese way of flipping the bird) (AN: The way you flip someone off is Japan is you hold down the bottom of your eye and stick out your tongue)
"No he's ours!" shouted the Dragons of Heaven, and they grabbed Kamui's other arm. The two different sides started pulling and tugging on Kamui and Kotori and Fuuma just watched on the sidelines in amazment.
"Oniichan why are they fighting over Kamui-chan?"
"Because they both want him for there side for the big battle to end the earth, but kamui has another self an evil side. Who doesn't like flowers or happy things, and when Kamui decides which side he wants to be on, the other Kamui will come out and take the other side, and the battle will begin!" explained Fuuma acting all angst like.
"Wow Oniichan how do you know all this stuff?"
"DON'T MAKE ME GET OUT THE SWORD!"
"Ahhhhh!"
"Wait I forgot to put up the barrier!" shouted Sorata as he let go and put up the barrier, and it was in the shape of a woman that was on truckers mud flaps.
"Just like with sex you must always have a barrier of protection right Arashi?" said Sorata, and Arashi just sweat dropped. Both sides go back to fighting, and little did they know but the evil, and half dressed, and half baked Kanoe was planning on stealing Kotori, and taking her back to the lire of the Dragons of the Earth.
"Come to me pretty girl." Said Kanoe, as she reached up her hands from a hole in the ground to grab Kotori.
"Ah help I can't scream for help!" said Kotori as she was being drug down the slimy hole.
Sei-chan: Hole Haha (AN: takes a giant fan with Japan's flag on it and slaps Sei-chan)
"Help me!" shouted Kotori.
"Don't worry Kotori I'll save you!" said Fuuma as he jumped down the hole.
By this time the Dragons of Earth have given up on getting Kamui so the retreated with their tales between their legs.
"Yea we won!" shouted Arashi as she lifted up her arms.
"Ahhhhh! Put down your arms they stink!" said Karen.
"Hey where are Kotori and Fuuma?"
"We don't know!" said the Dragons of Heaven.
"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" shouted Kamui as he franticly started searching for his lost friends, including making jumps over to Kyoto, and the moon, and still no Kotori and Fuuma.
Oh where oh where could they be? You'll have to find out in the next chapter of "The Parody that killed all X movie parodies"